LP_lady_bug_777

I've seen this before, its nothing new feeling scared and alone, no clue what to do im ready for the challenge though i won't be defeated i might lose a battle but never the war my life is changing i am used to that by now im trying to adjust but i don't know how i am leading two different lives and its getting harder to lie theres no point in hiding so why even try i have realized i can't please everyone so i should just be myself but i don't know who i am lost hope. lost faith. redeemed to the fullest how can i use this to my advantage its not all my fault-one day i will know but im losing it and i can't let it show confusion.exhaustion. where does it all end its really hard trying to blend in the past.the future. now is now why can't i just let go what happened to me is exactly that that does not make me who i am but who am i if i am not my past.... my future?

Bipolar i think i may be bipolar or maybe just messed up in the head i think i may be bipolar i'd rather be called crazy instead i used to think i was normal being weird isn't horrible i wish i still had the ability to pretend nothings wrong explaining myself to everyone just takes too long i wish someone could save me take me away from here no one understands me i "have nothing to fear" im so selfish it makes me sick im tired of having to choose and pick maybe if someone would just listen they could figure out what they're missin ive messed up everything i had it good for a while i hate just being an o.k. child

These scars will never fade away nor will the memory of why they are there maybe it's time to share my story maybe someone will care i'm not the average adolescent i've been through more in the past three years than a lot of adults have their entire lives i've seen the bad and the worse- i have cried a million tears but i am a fighter- a trooper what doesn't kill me makes me stronger everything works out in the long run can't keep relationships with anyone too scared i will lose them but i am also terrified of being alone the scars on my arms and my legs will never go away but the pain eventually will it's not easy knowing i have developed disorders for staying in those situations no one will ever know how i feel no one could possibly understand until they have walked in my shoes with the shoe strings tied farely loose-it would be too much to handle i held my head high for so long trying to pretend that nothing was wrong that got me absolutely no where BUT NOW I WILL SHOW MY SCARS TO ALL WHO WILL ACCEPT ME someone out there must care and show affection to me i am pleading for you to heal my broken heart as long as you don't hurt me

I see the light creeping through this darkened room it's pissin me off, what else is new i'm scared of the dark- scared of the light running away from the rest of my life i am not who daddy wants me to be i'm tired of everyone thinkin so highly of me i am not superwoman i'm barely makin it through each second they last so long sometimes what's so amazing about such a simple mind am i living a lie or dreaming of one psychosis is setting in i just want to be left alone here i go again mad at the world pushing away everyone who cares oh well cause "in the end it doesn't even matter", right? my hope was shot out the window long ago, maybe thats where the lights coming through from

i love you buttercup

hello hey does somebody want to make me a pretty signature...or a cool one whatever!! pretty please

It's been difficult it's been trying but after so long i'm done crying it hasn't helped and it never will it's time to show you how i feel i can't fake the anger and i'd feel a lot safer if you were out of the picture screw you and your lies you've been given enough tries to repent yourself i'll do what i must if i hear of one more punch or even a wrong tone i hate you i can't imagine how she feels who knew love could kill you will get what's coming to you you ready for such a hell i don't know what i can do to get her out of this but stayiihng with you will kill her and you apparently don't give a shit does it make you happy for her to hang her head down in shame of all the bruises, the scars-the broken bones? i wish i could show her love she deserves i wish she knew she was worth such love a world full of kisses and hugs i miss her beautiful face. her once beautiful eyes. i miss her will and strength and even the stupid fights (they never involved bruises) i miss her grip when she hugged me i miss the smiles now she can't even look at me i haven't seen her truely happy in a while i hope you rot alive i hope you burn she's been through enough torment and now -bitch, it's your turn one day she will gather the balls to pay you back for all you've done I love my mommy with all my heart every punch you've laid on her hits me just as hard i will save her one day one day she won't have to wear her patches of shame she has to be willing to get away from you i nkow it will happen some day if she doesn't break away her doom- i shall despair all for hear of loneliness all for someone to care. mom you know i love you not all in this world is lost but i cannot help you until you are ready to be your own boss get rid of this bastard- LEAVE i will scream when you finally break free but what the hell do i know oh yea he loves you-that's right nobody ever listens to me be gentle with that one folks, touchy subject for me. let me know what you think of it. i edited it a little bit cause i did't want everyone to think i was psycho. i was pissed when i wrote it if you can't tell. let me know k?

Hey everybody! I'm new obviously. I am collision_course_777's girlfriend/future fiance however you wanna put it. Be kind to me, I'm a sweetheart when people let me be one. Any tips, new topics, or just funny stuff ya wanna share go right ahead. Love ya!!

Hey guys! This is collision_course_777's girlfriend. I decided to register myself..fun place to be and all. Thanks for your responses to my stuff. I will have more posted on here don't you worry LOL! Well, I will be on here later. Be good kids!