chick flicks, stop the pain

Chick flicks, you know the ones, the type of movie that makes every male on earth wish he could hide in the deep dark hole til its over, movies that spend two hours talking about issues and feelings, and relationships, with no real story, with names like "The bridges of madison county", "you've got email" and my favorite pet hate of all, not a movie, but a TV show "The Gilmore girls", which makes my spine crawl with horror. There is only one thing I hate more than the chick flick and this musicals! Come on, if you saw someone dancing down the street singing, you would cross the road and hope they didn't follow!

You must be young, so I'll help you out here.

 

No guy ever got any help in getting laid by watching "Rambo" with a hot chick.

 

However, I have gotten laid plenty after watching all the movies you mentioned, and a few Cannes and Sundance Film Festival winning chick flicks.

 

90 minutes of a chick flick for an evening of hot sex...works for me.

One more thing...Fuck you!

 

I love a good musical...

rofl what can I say but

Hey, "HOW TO LOSE A GUY IN 10 DAYS" should be translated to say, "HOW TO GET HEAD FROM A CHICK BY WASTING ONLY 2 HOURS with a stupid DVD"

.

.

NO MUSICALS!@?@?@?@......Rocky Horror Picture Show you fool!

 

As for the chick Flick Thing, Have never had that problem. The ladies I associate with are usually into good movies like Boondock Saints, Fear and Loathing, The Devils Rejects etc...

...The ladies I associate with...

 

Yeah, it's amazing what a crack whore will do for $20 and a bottle of Thunderbird...

I'm hearing Quarky loud 'n' clear on this one. I remember coming home from work and wanting to watch Monday Night Football on my big screen TV after work, only to find my girlfriend and her daughter watching Will & Grace. What is it about overtly stupid programing and woman that go hand in hand? Anyone here ever take a gander at the Lifetime network? That network is well known for being a womans network and the programing is almost exclusively for stupid people. "My husband is cheating on me with the babysitter and I have breast cancer and he doesn't care". As men, we can't even have a good "guy" movie anymore as Hollywood has learned that if they inject some ditsy broad into the mix then they snare a wider demographic. So sick of these bullshit movies with a female action hero character. A 90 pound woman wit big 'ol tities that can kick a 200 pound muscle pound man across the room, is something I just can't watch.

I'm hearing Quarky loud 'n' clear on this one. I remember coming home from work and wanting to watch Monday Night Football on my big screen TV after work, only to find my girlfriend and her daughter watching Will & Grace. What is it about overtly stupid programing and woman that go hand in hand? Anyone here ever take a gander at the Lifetime network? That network is well known for being a womans network and the programing is almost exclusively for stupid people. "My husband is cheating on me with the babysitter and I have breast cancer and he doesn't care". As men, we can't even have a good "guy" movie anymore as Hollywood has learned that if they inject some ditsy broad into the mix then they snare a wider demographic. So sick of these bullshit movies with a female action hero character. A 90 pound woman wit big 'ol tities that can kick a 200 pound muscle pound man across the room, is something I just can't watch.

 

 

Although the tough hot woman schtick is played out and generally asinine, I'd personally rather see a 90lb woman with big hooters than a muscle man......I just tend to find staring at muscle men for two hours a little bit ummm, homoerotic. Homoerotica just isn't my thing.

 

But as for chick flicks, Quarky and Jhony hit the nail on the head. These things are complete utter schlock. Yea sure all movies for the most part are mind rotting garbage, but these things are scraping the bottom of the shit bucket. I remember the last chick flick I saw. It was something to do with some workaholic who gave up a high paying job to be with some ditzy cancer-infested boho girl. WHAT A FUCKING PUSSYWHIPPED MORON! I'm a fucking commie and I wouldn't give up my income to live in poverty just to fuck some hippy who's going to be dead in a month! And more disturbing....WHO COMES UP WITH THIS SHIT!? If I find them....me and Black & Decker are coming to re-educate their asses.

 

And I want to know why the fuck women make guys watch these things and blackmail them to by promising free sex? I've never made any women watch "General Blood vs the Ninja Terrorists" or the "Beriut Machine Gun Massacare"

and promise them whatever it is women like. Oh yea women don't like anything other than to be spoiled by some dude who expects nothing in return (but let's not get into that right now.) Therefore any future dates (pffft!!!) better not make me sit through any of these crappy sapfests.

NO MUSICALS!@?@?@?@......Rocky Horror Picture Show you fool!

 

As for the chick Flick Thing, Have never had that problem. The ladies I associate with are usually into good movies like Boondock Saints, Fear and Loathing, The Devils Rejects etc...

 

I agree with you the rocky horror picture show is the best musical made, when I said I hate musicals I was commenting on the doris day, debbie reynolds type of clap trap.

I have to say 99.9% of new movies, television, and video games are absolute shit.

I just watched Spanglish...biggest waste of 2hrs of my life...well idk about that but it wasn't a very good movie.

I watched Mr. and Mrs. Smith. By far the biggest piece of crap ever devised.

I watched Mr. and Mrs. Smith. By far the biggest piece of crap ever devised.

 

That movie is a perfect example of what I was talking about in regards to how Hollywood has tuned to a specific formula to snare a wider demographic. By making a "Guys" action movie, with a great appeal for women by injecting a ditzy broad/love interest. They do the same trick by injecting what they rate as "crude" humor into kids movies, like Shrek, in order to gain a PG rating. PG movies traditionally have a higher turnout then G movies because the adults are more compelled to see it themselves.

Yeah, it's amazing what a crack whore will do for $20 and a bottle of Thunderbird...

 

Ain't it so........

 

Times change, but some value systems remain untainted by time and tide.

I watched Mr. and Mrs. Smith. By far the biggest piece of crap ever devised.

 

That's for sure...

 

I have a MUCH better idea for a movie.

 

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie having wild - freaking - monkey swinging from the chandelier - crazy ass sex. Just like they were doing in the trailer on the movie set of Mr. & Mrs. Shit.

 

It only needs to be about 20 minutes long.

 

Production should take about one day at a cost of $10,000 total.

 

Pay Pitt and Jolie $25 million each.

 

Release to theaters and then to video, worldwide profits estimated at around 1 billion dollars. Maybe more if she does him in the ass with a huge strap-on.

 

Damn, I should run Hollywood.

Couldn't you work Jennifer Anniston into that somewhere? Please. I'd eat a mile of her shit just to get to her asshole. I'd eat a whole can of raviolies out of her ass with a wooden spoon. I'd..........................

Jhony, just go buy some porn.

.

.

Jhony, just go buy some porn.

.

.

 

 

I get my porn for free, thank you. And lots of it! I'm tired of the poorly photoshoped pictures of Jenny Anniston nude. I know they aren't real, but the appeal is too strong for me to resist.

No. The Rocky Horror Picture Show is absolute shit.

No. The Rocky Horror Picture Show is absolute shit.

 

bah!

 

But the programs that does my head in above all else is "The Gilmore Girls" who ever thought this up should be made to suffer, it is the without doubt the biggest load of crap I have ever had to sit through, after an hour of listening to them prattle on about nothing much at all, I feel like putting my head under the wheels of a truck, they're just fucking annoying and there is nothing I can do to escape, even the adds make my skin crawl.

bah!

 

But the programs that does my head in above all else is "The Gilmore Girls" who ever thought this up should be made to suffer, it is the without doubt the biggest load of crap I have ever had to sit through, after an hour of listening to them prattle on about nothing much at all, I feel like putting my head under the wheels of a truck, they're just fucking annoying and there is nothing I can do to escape, even the adds make my skin crawl.

 

Might I suggest one of two courses of action.

 

1. Press the button on your remote that says CHANNEL, up or down, makes no difference. The offending material will magically change on your screen to something totally different.

 

2. Press the POWER button on your remote and the screen will magically go blank. Then, go select a nice book, something that catches your attention, and discover a lost art, reading. This activity will be further enhanced by the addition of a nice cup of your hot beverage of choice. I highly recommend it.