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FlonkNews: This Could Make for a Whiffy Ransom Situation


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Guest mimus

A Lloyd's of London syndicate said Tuesday it is insuring the nose of

winemaker Ilja Gort for $8 million.

 

The Dutch winemaker and taster took out the policy after hearing about a

man who lost his sense of smell in a car accident.

 

"I thought it must be a horror to lose your smell," Gort said. "It would

mean that you cannot taste wine anymore. Tasting wine is something you do

with your nose, not your mouth."

 

Gort, 47, said his nose is essential for him to produce top quality wines

at his Chateau de la Garde vineyard in the Bordeaux region of France.

 

The custom policy covers Gort for the loss of either his nose or his sense

of smell and has some conditions for protecting his nose. Among other

things, he is barred from riding a motorcycle or working as a knife

thrower's assistant or fire-breather.

 

And he can't be a boxer.

 

<more>

 

http://www.newsday.com/news/nationworld/world/wire/sns-ap-odd-britain-valuable-nose,0,3603731.story

 

--

tinmimus99@hotmail.com

 

smeeter 11 or maybe 12

 

mp 10

 

mhm 29x13

 

You display a hole: admitted, and a fine hole it is.

But how does this hole differ from any other?

 

< _Cugel the Clever_ aka _Cugel's Saga_

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Guest Bill Cleere

On Mar 18, 2:13 pm, mimus <tinmimu...@hotmail.com> wrote:

> A Lloyd's of London syndicate said Tuesday it is insuring the nose of

> winemaker Ilja Gort for $8 million.

>

> The Dutch winemaker and taster took out the policy after hearing about a

> man who lost his sense of smell in a car accident.

>

> "I thought it must be a horror to lose your smell," Gort said. "It would

> mean that you cannot taste wine anymore. Tasting wine is something you do

> with your nose, not your mouth."

>

> Gort, 47, said his nose is essential for him to produce top quality wines

> at his Chateau de la Garde vineyard in the Bordeaux region of France.

>

> The custom policy covers Gort for the loss of either his nose or his sense

> of smell and has some conditions for protecting his nose. Among other

> things, he is barred from riding a motorcycle or working as a knife

> thrower's assistant or fire-breather.

>

> And he can't be a boxer.

 

Although I look down on wine nonsense as a poor

substitute for genuinely refined aesthetic taste,

it is nevertheless encouraging to find a man willing

to insure anything other than that other pathetic

appendage, which I'm sure, if given the choice of

insuring one and only one bodily part, 99.9% of men

would choose.

 

Excepting your porn stars, of course. They have

a right to protect their livelihood. A Britisher named

Frankie Jakeman did his for $1.6 million.

 

If I was British, I might follow his example, and have mine

done for one and six.

 

-- Bill Cleere

 

"I prefer the pleasure of writing bits of nonsense to that of wearing

an embroidered coat which costs 800 francs." (Stendhal)

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Guest mimus

On Tue, 18 Mar 2008 15:15:50 -0700, Bill Cleere wrote:

> On Mar 18, 2:13 pm, mimus <tinmimu...@hotmail.com> wrote:

>

>> A Lloyd's of London syndicate said Tuesday it is insuring the nose of

>> winemaker Ilja Gort for $8 million.

>>

>> The Dutch winemaker and taster took out the policy after hearing about a

>> man who lost his sense of smell in a car accident.

>>

>> "I thought it must be a horror to lose your smell," Gort said. "It would

>> mean that you cannot taste wine anymore. Tasting wine is something you do

>> with your nose, not your mouth."

>>

>> Gort, 47, said his nose is essential for him to produce top quality wines

>> at his Chateau de la Garde vineyard in the Bordeaux region of France.

>>

>> The custom policy covers Gort for the loss of either his nose or his sense

>> of smell and has some conditions for protecting his nose. Among other

>> things, he is barred from riding a motorcycle or working as a knife

>> thrower's assistant or fire-breather.

>>

>> And he can't be a boxer.

>

> Although I look down on wine nonsense as a poor

> substitute for genuinely refined aesthetic taste,

> it is nevertheless encouraging to find a man willing

> to insure anything other than that other pathetic

> appendage, which I'm sure, if given the choice of

> insuring one and only one bodily part, 99.9% of men

> would choose.

>

> Excepting your porn stars, of course. They have

> a right to protect their livelihood. A Britisher named

> Frankie Jakeman did his for $1.6 million.

>

> If I was British, I might follow his example, and have mine

> done for one and six.

 

I doubt Lloyd's would be interested.

 

Maybe a bookmaker.

 

--

tinmimus99@hotmail.com

 

smeeter 11 or maybe 12

 

mp 10

 

mhm 29x13

 

I wish to protest most strongly at the scandalous

treatment this country's finest policeman, Mr James

Anderton, received on your programme last night.

To sit a fine Christian gentleman down in close

proximity to an unsavoury crowd of prostitutes was

bad enough. Even worse was to allow him to be

humiliated intellectually by the afore-mentioned

rabble . . . .

 

< Henry Root

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Guest Bill Cleere

On Mar 18, 4:25 pm, mimus <tinmimu...@hotmail.com> wrote:

> On Tue, 18 Mar 2008 15:15:50 -0700, Bill Cleere wrote:

> > On Mar 18, 2:13 pm, mimus <tinmimu...@hotmail.com> wrote:

>

> >> A Lloyd's of London syndicate said Tuesday it is insuring the nose of

> >> winemaker Ilja Gort for $8 million.

>

> >> The Dutch winemaker and taster took out the policy after hearing about a

> >> man who lost his sense of smell in a car accident.

>

> >> "I thought it must be a horror to lose your smell," Gort said. "It would

> >> mean that you cannot taste wine anymore. Tasting wine is something you do

> >> with your nose, not your mouth."

>

> >> Gort, 47, said his nose is essential for him to produce top quality wines

> >> at his Chateau de la Garde vineyard in the Bordeaux region of France.

>

> >> The custom policy covers Gort for the loss of either his nose or his sense

> >> of smell and has some conditions for protecting his nose. Among other

> >> things, he is barred from riding a motorcycle or working as a knife

> >> thrower's assistant or fire-breather.

>

> >> And he can't be a boxer.

>

> > Although I look down on wine nonsense as a poor

> > substitute for genuinely refined aesthetic taste,

> > it is nevertheless encouraging to find a man willing

> > to insure anything other than that other pathetic

> > appendage, which I'm sure, if given the choice of

> > insuring one and only one bodily part, 99.9% of men

> > would choose.

>

> > Excepting your porn stars, of course. They have

> > a right to protect their livelihood. A Britisher named

> > Frankie Jakeman did his for $1.6 million.

>

> > If I was British, I might follow his example, and have mine

> > done for one and six.

>

> I doubt Lloyd's would be interested.

 

....as they were not. One of the Waiters

showed me the door. To be precise, quoth he:

"If you will be good enough to look over there, sir,

you will observe the door. Kindly be the fuck out

of it immediately."

> Maybe a bookmaker.

 

The best William Hill could do was 10-3 against,

which I didn't fancy.

 

The other punters were laughing at me, so I told

them, "I'm getting better odds than England, you

thick fucks!" That shut them up.

 

-- Bill Cleere

 

"I prefer the pleasure of writing bits of nonsense to that of wearing

an embroidered coat which costs 800 francs." (Stendhal)

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Guest dave hillstrom

On Tue, 18 Mar 2008 16:37:40 -0700 (PDT), Bill Cleere

<bcleere@gmail.com> wrote:

>On Mar 18, 4:25 pm, mimus <tinmimu...@hotmail.com> wrote:

>> On Tue, 18 Mar 2008 15:15:50 -0700, Bill Cleere wrote:

>> > On Mar 18, 2:13 pm, mimus <tinmimu...@hotmail.com> wrote:

>>

>> >> A Lloyd's of London syndicate said Tuesday it is insuring the nose of

>> >> winemaker Ilja Gort for $8 million.

>>

>> >> The Dutch winemaker and taster took out the policy after hearing about a

>> >> man who lost his sense of smell in a car accident.

>>

>> >> "I thought it must be a horror to lose your smell," Gort said. "It would

>> >> mean that you cannot taste wine anymore. Tasting wine is something you do

>> >> with your nose, not your mouth."

>>

>> >> Gort, 47, said his nose is essential for him to produce top quality wines

>> >> at his Chateau de la Garde vineyard in the Bordeaux region of France.

>>

>> >> The custom policy covers Gort for the loss of either his nose or his sense

>> >> of smell and has some conditions for protecting his nose. Among other

>> >> things, he is barred from riding a motorcycle or working as a knife

>> >> thrower's assistant or fire-breather.

>>

>> >> And he can't be a boxer.

>>

>> > Although I look down on wine nonsense as a poor

>> > substitute for genuinely refined aesthetic taste,

>> > it is nevertheless encouraging to find a man willing

>> > to insure anything other than that other pathetic

>> > appendage, which I'm sure, if given the choice of

>> > insuring one and only one bodily part, 99.9% of men

>> > would choose.

>>

>> > Excepting your porn stars, of course. They have

>> > a right to protect their livelihood. A Britisher named

>> > Frankie Jakeman did his for $1.6 million.

>>

>> > If I was British, I might follow his example, and have mine

>> > done for one and six.

>>

>> I doubt Lloyd's would be interested.

>

>...as they were not. One of the Waiters

>showed me the door. To be precise, quoth he:

>"If you will be good enough to look over there, sir,

>you will observe the door. Kindly be the fuck out

>of it immediately."

>

>> Maybe a bookmaker.

>

>The best William Hill could do was 10-3 against,

>which I didn't fancy.

>

>The other punters were laughing at me, so I told

>them, "I'm getting better odds than England, you

>thick fucks!" That shut them up.

 

you know, menjy thinks he can "sic" you on me. did you see that?

 

--

dave hillstrom mhm15x4 zrbj

 

<This space for rent.>

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Guest Bill Cleere

On Mar 20, 12:44 am, dave hillstrom <D...@MeOw.OrG> wrote:

> you know, menjy thinks he can "sic" you on me. did you see that?

 

No. Where's it at?

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Guest mimus

On Thu, 20 Mar 2008 09:39:01 -0700, Bill Cleere wrote:

> On Mar 20, 12:44 am, dave hillstrom <D...@MeOw.OrG> wrote:

>

>> you know, menjy thinks he can "sic" you on me. did you see that?

>

> No. Where's it at?

 

Just try not to look like a trout.

 

--

tinmimus99@hotmail.com

 

smeeter 11 or maybe 12

 

mp 10

 

mhm 29x13

 

You want a job and a lizard to ride?

 

< _The Einstein Intersection_

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Guest Bill Cleere

On Mar 20, 3:24 pm, mimus <tinmimu...@hotmail.com> wrote:

> On Thu, 20 Mar 2008 09:39:01 -0700, Bill Cleere wrote:

> > On Mar 20, 12:44 am, dave hillstrom <D...@MeOw.OrG> wrote:

>

> >> you know, menjy thinks he can "sic" you on me. did you see that?

>

> > No. Where's it at?

>

> Just try not to look like a trout.

 

Why not? Is Menjy having those species-identity issues again?

 

Last time it was fucking insects nobody could look like,

if I'm remembering right.

 

OK, I'll have a shot at not looking like a trout....

 

[tries]

 

There...I went for something in a goodish haddock.

Did it work? Yes? Splendid!

 

-- Bill Cleere

 

"I prefer the pleasure of writing bits of nonsense to that of wearing

an embroidered coat which costs 800 francs." (Stendhal)

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Guest dave hillstrom

On Thu, 20 Mar 2008 09:39:01 -0700 (PDT), Bill Cleere

<bcleere@gmail.com> wrote:

>On Mar 20, 12:44 am, dave hillstrom <D...@MeOw.OrG> wrote:

>

>> you know, menjy thinks he can "sic" you on me. did you see that?

>

>No. Where's it at?

>

 

<td24u39s4ntq9o1npj8rku01sknvqfl9r5@4ax.com>

 

mheh.

 

<stirs pot>

 

--

dave hillstrom mhm15x4 zrbj

 

<This space for rent.>

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Guest Bill Cleere

On Mar 20, 10:56 pm, dave hillstrom <D...@MeOw.OrG> wrote:

> On Thu, 20 Mar 2008 09:39:01 -0700 (PDT), Bill Cleere

>

> <bcle...@gmail.com> wrote:

> >On Mar 20, 12:44 am, dave hillstrom <D...@MeOw.OrG> wrote:

>

> >> you know, menjy thinks he can "sic" you on me. did you see that?

>

> >No. Where's it at?

>

> <td24u39s4ntq9o1npj8rku01sknvqfl...@4ax.com>

>

> mheh.

>

> <stirs pot>

 

I'm not biting your damn trousers, so you can both forget it.

 

-- Bill Cleere

 

"I prefer the pleasure of writing bits of nonsense to that of wearing

an embroidered coat which costs 800 francs." (Stendhal)

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Guest dave hillstrom

On Fri, 21 Mar 2008 13:21:20 -0700 (PDT), Bill Cleere

<bcleere@gmail.com> wrote:

>On Mar 20, 10:56 pm, dave hillstrom <D...@MeOw.OrG> wrote:

>> On Thu, 20 Mar 2008 09:39:01 -0700 (PDT), Bill Cleere

>>

>> <bcle...@gmail.com> wrote:

>> >On Mar 20, 12:44 am, dave hillstrom <D...@MeOw.OrG> wrote:

>>

>> >> you know, menjy thinks he can "sic" you on me. did you see that?

>>

>> >No. Where's it at?

>>

>> <td24u39s4ntq9o1npj8rku01sknvqfl...@4ax.com>

>>

>> mheh.

>>

>> <stirs pot>

>

>I'm not biting your damn trousers, so you can both forget it.

 

damnit.

 

--

dave hillstrom mhm15x4 zrbj

 

<This space for rent.>

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Guest dave hillstrom

On Thu, 20 Mar 2008 15:51:36 -0700 (PDT), Bill Cleere

<bcleere@gmail.com> wrote:

>On Mar 20, 3:24 pm, mimus <tinmimu...@hotmail.com> wrote:

>> On Thu, 20 Mar 2008 09:39:01 -0700, Bill Cleere wrote:

>> > On Mar 20, 12:44 am, dave hillstrom <D...@MeOw.OrG> wrote:

>>

>> >> you know, menjy thinks he can "sic" you on me. did you see that?

>>

>> > No. Where's it at?

>>

>> Just try not to look like a trout.

>

>Why not? Is Menjy having those species-identity issues again?

>

>Last time it was fucking insects nobody could look like,

>if I'm remembering right.

>

>OK, I'll have a shot at not looking like a trout....

>

>[tries]

>

>There...I went for something in a goodish haddock.

>Did it work? Yes? Splendid!

 

trout. <drool>

 

--

dave hillstrom mhm15x4 zrbj

 

<This space for rent.>

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