Funny Quotes

Okay, i know they're around, so post em here. I'll post the ones i've acquired that i saved. they're from irc mostly

some are just.. random

i'm not bipolar, i only have one pole - me

<Raven> I tried setting my hotmail password to penis.

<Raven> It said my password wasn't long enough.

i'm spazz in this one

<Spazz> Seems like when I say "FUCK" you get an EOF error :o

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<Bartolimis> fuck

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<Bartolimis> fuck

<Spazz> fuck

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<Spazz> fuck

<Bartolimis> stop

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<Bartolimis> we're done >

<Ranto> hmh?

<Spazz> Your client got an error...

<Bartolimis> yeah, we're done saying fuck

<Spazz> everytime we said f***

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<Spazz> Quit saying fukc

<Bartolimis> my bad

<Spazz> fuck*

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<Icc> Someone says fuck and he drops ?

*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)

watched this one

JstWnnaHveFuN08: do you think i should call a guy friend and talk to him about my problems? or will he not care?

Thilo: Here's how it works: if a guy helps you with your problems, you're obligated to give him a blowjob.

JstWnnaHveFuN08: lol thanks that cheered me up

Thilo: No problem. That'll be one blowjob please.

lmao...

Jakefeb3: do you know a turtles only weakness?

AvatarOfSolusek: no

AvatarOfSolusek: well

AvatarOfSolusek: thier slowness

Jakefeb3: there weakness is they cant roll over when they are on their backs

AvatarOfSolusek: lol

Jakefeb3: now i have a plan

Jakefeb3: if i duck tape 2 turtles together they are unstoppable

<MasterG> .....................................................................

..................................

<judas> where's pacman when you need him?

lol this one makes you think..

Mike3285: wtf is a palindrome

MaroonSand: no its not dude

lmao...

<glacial> I love school

<glacial> Today our term paper due date's set

<glacial> Our instructor says that we WILL hand in the paper on time, and she'll accept no excuses except illness, with a note from our doctor, or a death in the immediate family, with a note from the dead member.

<glacial> So this wiseass pipes up: "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?"

<glacial> She waits for the laughs to die down and says:

<glacial> "Well, I guess you'll have to learn to write with your other hand"

i'm zooass.. don't ask

<born1986> why the fuck isn't my disc drive working

<born1986> i fucking worked on that essay for three friggin' hours in school

<born1986> i now i cant finish it 'cos my fuckin drive ain't working

<Z00ass> you got the right drivers?

<born1986> hell yes

<born1986> it was working fine yesterday

<born1986> why does this shit always happen to me?

<Z00ass> maybe that little clip on the side is i nthe wrong position

<born1986> i havent touched it since school

<born1986> i'm growing impatient

<born1986> ANGRY even

<Z00ass> throw that shit out tha window

. . .

<born1986> OMG i fuckin did it!!!

<born1986> FUCK!!!!!

<Z00ass> it works?

<born1986> no, i threw it out the window

<Z00ass> the disk?

<born1986> NO the whole drive

<born1986> i live on the 6th floor, made a nice *smash*

<Z00ass>

<born1986> FUCK SHIT FUCK

<born1986> THE DISK WAS STILL INSIDE

<born1986> brb

. . .

<born1986> shit

<Z00ass> what? did ya break it?

<born1986> well i couldn't open the drive

<born1986> so i had to pound it against a rock

<Z00ass> :o

<born1986> quite HARD

<born1986> and you know what?

<born1986> that fucking disk wasnt even there

<Z00ass> ???

<born1986> i got so mad i threw the remaiders of the drive on to the freeway

<born1986> and when i got back upstairs i foud the disk inside my bag

<Z00ass> lol

<born1986> I NEVER EVEN PUT IT IN THE DRIVE

<born1986> i'm actually cryin right now

. . .

<born1986> wonder if i could make that drive work again

<born1986> brb

lol.. one of my co workers..

<Ich> I have passed the transitional stage of internet geekhood

<Ich> I was cashiering at work today, and was punching in the code for plums, which is 4040.

<Ich> and the 0 key doesn't work this well, so I punched it in wrong.

<Ich> and the machine flashed up "Item Not Found: 404"

<Ich> and I actually laughed out loud

lol.. this one made me laugh...

<Sigurd> a sprite is anything not static

<SRElysian> a sprite is a variable object

<SRElysian> be it 2d or 3d

<TorMuck> a sprite is a fucking soda

<TorMuck> you god damn geekass bastards

lmao.. MK r00lz

<MortalKombat> stfu mat|t u cu.nt

* Acaila sets mode: +b MortalKombat!*@*

<@Acaila> FINISH HIM

<mat|t> rofl

<MortalKombat> omg wtf man

* MortalKombat was kicked by Acaila (forward, forward, back, back, forward, punch)

<@Acaila> FATALITY!

last one..

<Galactic> you know what's ALWAYS bothered me? cold cereal mascots

<Galactic> I mean that is just some FUCKED UP SHIT

<Galactic> the Trix rabbit, for example

<Galactic> I dunno man... if I were him I'd be fucking KILLING some kids

<Galactic> I remember a commercial where the fuckin rabbit WENT INTO A FUCKIN STORE AND BOUGHT A BOX OF TRIX WITH HIS OWN FUCKIN MONEY.

<Galactic> fuckin kids came outta NOWHERE and basically fuckin mug the poor stupid bitch rabbit

<Galactic> "silly rabbit Trix are for kids"

<Galactic> Fuckin rabbit just sits there and looks depressed.

<Galactic> FUCK NO that wouldn't fly with me

<Galactic> I'd have pimp-slapped EVERY ONE OF those fuckin bitches

<Galactic> and made them go get me the REST of a "complete breakfast" and eat Trix right in front of them bitches and THEN beat the shit out of them some more.

<Galactic> and wtf is with the disguises? All the dumb rabbit does is hide his ears and all of a sudden he's a fuckin kid?

<Galactic> I dunno about you, but if I SAW a 6 foot fuckin RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap, I wouldn't immediately think

<Galactic> "Hey, there's a cool lookin human kid, let me go over and share some of my cereal with him"

<Galactic> NO.

<Galactic> I'd be thinking

<Galactic> "that's a 6 foot fuckin RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap... what the FUCK was I just smoking?"

<Galactic> another thing... wtf is up with cereal being "A part of this complete breakfast"

<Galactic> last time -I- checked, cereal WAS breakfast

<Galactic> they show a big ass bowl of frosted flakes next to a waffle, a pancake, toast, a banana, a fuckin grapefruit... who the FUCK eats a breakfast that big

<Flaming_Duck> not me

<Flaming Duck> I don't even EAT breakfast nomore

<Flaming_Duck> I mean, I eat when I get up

<Flaming_Duck> but the whole thought "BREAKFAST IS ONLY SERVED UNTIL SUCH AND SUCH TIME"

<FLaming_Suck> bitch, you make my fucking sausage and egg sandwich when I pay you the fucking money

<Flaming_Duck> don't give me that shit.

<Galactic> Back to stupid cereal mascots...

<Galactic> Lucky Charms.

<Galactic> FUCKING LUCKY CHARMS

<Galactic> Lucky can turn the fucking MOON into a marshmallow, and he can't escape a bunch of fucking 6 year olds?!?!?

<Galactic> C'mon now, Lucky.

<Galactic> I KNOW your bitch ass has got to have a "Blow the fucking kids up" spell SOMEWHERE

<Galactic> or make "kid marshamllows" and EAT those bitches.

<Galactic> "They're after me Lucky Charms!"

<Galactic> ....

<Galactic> KILL THEM, BITCH!

<Galactic> I dunno why I went off on this rant here

<Galactic> it's just always bothered me."

LMAO thats funny stuff you got there

meh i only got inspirational ones....

"dont accept rides from strange men...remember men are all strange"

"you are a man...except better, you have boobs and a skirt...you are mine"- my friend

"if its not lady like to swear i must be a man..a man... A MAN?? OMFG IM A MAN *goes mental then passes out*

"i have a billion monkeys in my pants frying pancakes...there are also break dancing turtles chopping wood...they are eating the monkeys OH DEAR GOD NO *pulls banana face*" - a different friend

"i think about really perverted stuff to busy my mind, and fall into a daze. if some one asks me something i can only respond with this : shhhhhhhhhhhhh i need porn!!!"

yes...uh my inspriational quotes by my friends n stuff

Very scary..

*watching dude where's my car?*

Me-that girl is such a whore

Kandy-she's not a whore, she's just expensive!

lol

watching Joe Dirt

"I can see down your shirt!"

watched this one

JstWnnaHveFuN08: do you think i should call a guy friend and talk to him about my problems? or will he not care?

Thilo: Here's how it works: if a guy helps you with your problems, you're obligated to give him a blowjob.

JstWnnaHveFuN08: lol thanks that cheered me up

Thilo: No problem. That'll be one blowjob please.

 

 

Mike3285: wtf is a palindrome

MaroonSand: no its not dude

 

 

<born1986> why the fuck isn't my disc drive working

<born1986> i fucking worked on that essay for three friggin' hours in school

<born1986> i now i cant finish it 'cos my fuckin drive ain't working

<Z00ass> you got the right drivers?

<born1986> hell yes

<born1986> it was working fine yesterday

<born1986> why does this shit always happen to me?

<Z00ass> maybe that little clip on the side is i nthe wrong position

<born1986> i havent touched it since school

<born1986> i'm growing impatient

<born1986> ANGRY even

<Z00ass> throw that shit out tha window

<born1986> OMG i fuckin did it!!!

<born1986> FUCK!!!!!

<Z00ass> it works?

<born1986> no, i threw it out the window

<Z00ass> the disk?

<born1986> NO the whole drive

<born1986> i live on the 6th floor, made a nice *smash*

<Z00ass>

<born1986> FUCK SHIT FUCK

<born1986> THE DISK WAS STILL INSIDE

<born1986> brb

<born1986> shit

<Z00ass> what? did ya break it?

<born1986> well i couldn't open the drive

<born1986> so i had to pound it against a rock

<Z00ass> :o

<born1986> quite HARD

<born1986> and you know what?

<born1986> that fucking disk wasnt even there

<Z00ass> ???

<born1986> i got so mad i threw the remaiders of the drive on to the freeway

<born1986> and when i got back upstairs i foud the disk inside my bag

<Z00ass> lol

<born1986> I NEVER EVEN PUT IT IN THE DRIVE

<born1986> i'm actually cryin right now

<born1986> wonder if i could make that drive work again

<born1986> brb

 

 

<Sigurd> a sprite is anything not static

<SRElysian> a sprite is a variable object

<SRElysian> be it 2d or 3d

<TorMuck> a sprite is a fucking soda

<TorMuck> you god damn geekass bastards

 

 

 

<Galactic> you know what's ALWAYS bothered me? cold cereal mascots

<Galactic> I mean that is just some FUCKED UP SHIT

<Galactic> the Trix rabbit, for example

<Galactic> I dunno man... if I were him I'd be fucking KILLING some kids

<Galactic> I remember a commercial where the fuckin rabbit WENT INTO A FUCKIN STORE AND BOUGHT A BOX OF TRIX WITH HIS OWN FUCKIN MONEY.

<Galactic> fuckin kids came outta NOWHERE and basically fuckin mug the poor stupid bitch rabbit

<Galactic> "silly rabbit Trix are for kids"

<Galactic> Fuckin rabbit just sits there and looks depressed.

<Galactic> FUCK NO that wouldn't fly with me

<Galactic> I'd have pimp-slapped EVERY ONE OF those fuckin bitches

<Galactic> and made them go get me the REST of a "complete breakfast" and eat Trix right in front of them bitches and THEN beat the shit out of them some more.

<Galactic> and wtf is with the disguises? All the dumb rabbit does is hide his ears and all of a sudden he's a fuckin kid?

<Galactic> I dunno about you, but if I SAW a 6 foot fuckin RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap, I wouldn't immediately think

<Galactic> "Hey, there's a cool lookin human kid, let me go over and share some of my cereal with him"

<Galactic> NO.

<Galactic> I'd be thinking

<Galactic> "that's a 6 foot fuckin RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap... what the FUCK was I just smoking?"

<Galactic> another thing... wtf is up with cereal being "A part of this complete breakfast"

<Galactic> last time -I- checked, cereal WAS breakfast

<Galactic> they show a big ass bowl of frosted flakes next to a waffle, a pancake, toast, a banana, a fuckin grapefruit... who the FUCK eats a breakfast that big

<Flaming_Duck> not me

<Flaming Duck> I don't even EAT breakfast nomore

<Flaming_Duck> I mean, I eat when I get up

<Flaming_Duck> but the whole thought "BREAKFAST IS ONLY SERVED UNTIL SUCH AND SUCH TIME"

<FLaming_Suck> bitch, you make my fucking sausage and egg sandwich when I pay you the fucking money

<Flaming_Duck> don't give me that shit.

<Galactic> Back to stupid cereal mascots...

<Galactic> Lucky Charms.

<Galactic> FUCKING LUCKY CHARMS

<Galactic> Lucky can turn the fucking MOON into a marshmallow, and he can't escape a bunch of fucking 6 year olds?!?!?

<Galactic> C'mon now, Lucky.

<Galactic> I KNOW your bitch ass has got to have a "Blow the fucking kids up" spell SOMEWHERE

<Galactic> or make "kid marshamllows" and EAT those bitches.

<Galactic> "They're after me Lucky Charms!"

<Galactic> ....

<Galactic> KILL THEM, BITCH!

<Galactic> I dunno why I went off on this rant here

<Galactic> it's just always bothered me."

haha. those were the funniest.

<Spazz> Seems like when I say "FUCK" you get an EOF error :o

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<Bartolimis> fuck

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<Bartolimis> fuck

<Spazz> fuck

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<Spazz> fuck

<Bartolimis> stop

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<Bartolimis> we're done >

<Ranto> hmh?

<Spazz> Your client got an error...

<Bartolimis> yeah, we're done saying fuck

<Spazz> everytime we said f***

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<Spazz> Quit saying fukc

<Bartolimis> my bad

<Spazz> fuck*

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<Icc> Someone says fuck and he drops ?

*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)

 

LMFAO!!!!!! That made me laugh so much I think I pissed myself.. holy shit lmao!

<Galactic> you know what's ALWAYS bothered me? cold cereal mascots

<Galactic> I mean that is just some FUCKED UP SHIT

<Galactic> the Trix rabbit, for example

<Galactic> I dunno man... if I were him I'd be fucking KILLING some kids

<Galactic> I remember a commercial where the fuckin rabbit WENT INTO A FUCKIN STORE AND BOUGHT A BOX OF TRIX WITH HIS OWN FUCKIN MONEY.

<Galactic> fuckin kids came outta NOWHERE and basically fuckin mug the poor stupid bitch rabbit

<Galactic> "silly rabbit Trix are for kids"

<Galactic> Fuckin rabbit just sits there and looks depressed.

<Galactic> FUCK NO that wouldn't fly with me

<Galactic> I'd have pimp-slapped EVERY ONE OF those fuckin bitches

<Galactic> and made them go get me the REST of a "complete breakfast" and eat Trix right in front of them bitches and THEN beat the shit out of them some more.

<Galactic> and wtf is with the disguises? All the dumb rabbit does is hide his ears and all of a sudden he's a fuckin kid?

<Galactic> I dunno about you, but if I SAW a 6 foot fuckin RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap, I wouldn't immediately think

<Galactic> "Hey, there's a cool lookin human kid, let me go over and share some of my cereal with him"

<Galactic> NO.

<Galactic> I'd be thinking

<Galactic> "that's a 6 foot fuckin RABBIT with his ears tucked under a baseball cap... what the FUCK was I just smoking?"

<Galactic> another thing... wtf is up with cereal being "A part of this complete breakfast"

<Galactic> last time -I- checked, cereal WAS breakfast

<Galactic> they show a big ass bowl of frosted flakes next to a waffle, a pancake, toast, a banana, a fuckin grapefruit... who the FUCK eats a breakfast that big

<Flaming_Duck> not me

<Flaming Duck> I don't even EAT breakfast nomore

<Flaming_Duck> I mean, I eat when I get up

<Flaming_Duck> but the whole thought "BREAKFAST IS ONLY SERVED UNTIL SUCH AND SUCH TIME"

<FLaming_Suck> bitch, you make my fucking sausage and egg sandwich when I pay you the fucking money

<Flaming_Duck> don't give me that shit.

<Galactic> Back to stupid cereal mascots...

<Galactic> Lucky Charms.

<Galactic> FUCKING LUCKY CHARMS

<Galactic> Lucky can turn the fucking MOON into a marshmallow, and he can't escape a bunch of fucking 6 year olds?!?!?

<Galactic> C'mon now, Lucky.

<Galactic> I KNOW your bitch ass has got to have a "Blow the fucking kids up" spell SOMEWHERE

<Galactic> or make "kid marshamllows" and EAT those bitches.

<Galactic> "They're after me Lucky Charms!"

<Galactic> ....

<Galactic> KILL THEM, BITCH!

<Galactic> I dunno why I went off on this rant here

<Galactic> it's just always bothered me."[/Quote]

 

^^ lmao! That's going as my away message .. :thumbsup:

you gotta see em...heard there Specially chez's laughin

http://www.place4myhead.com/eng/Audioquotes/audioquoteshead.htm

you gotta see em...heard there Specially chez's laughin

http://www.place4myhead.com/eng/Audioquotes/audioquoteshead.htm

url not valid and cannot be located..

This is what my friend said to our teacher...

"You look like JA Rule,he's hott!"

And this is me talking to my aunt when i was smaller...

Me:How does a air plane stay in the air?

Aunt:With it's enjen.

Me:our car has a enjen,why the hell dosen't it fly!?!?

Aunt:um,well it also has wings...

Me:so your telling me when i turn 16 and mom gets me a car

all i have to do is tape some wings on the side of it and drive it

off a cliff and it will fly...Kewl,i'm gonna call Desiree and see if

she wants to come**runs off**

Aunt:NO!..GET BACK HERE YOU DUMBASS!!!

lmao... anyways, here's another one i found in the depths of my computer

<Ed> Why is there so much fat porn lately? Someone needs to be shot.

<Rivorus> what the hell is wrong with fat porn?

<Toad> Yeah, I'm sure they all have great personalities.

EDIT: another one

Jesus: my girl mastrabates more then i do

Finque: seeing as how your girl is your hand, i'd like to hear you explain that one

lmao those r dementicated 0___o but funny

kinda disturbing too..

Matt - Tomorrow @ Kin Coulee... gunna be awesome says:

the hell, why add me?

Matt - Tomorrow @ Kin Coulee... gunna be awesome says:

austins pretty much organizing it

Party at Kin Coulee tomorrow!!! Add Matt (mis3ry120@hotmail.com) for more info!! says:

I know you are but what am I?

Matt - Tomorrow @ Kin Coulee... gunna be awesome says:

... i hate you.

Not exactly funny.. but it's all I got. I left all my funny quotes in my other jacket... yes... that'll do.

this is too funny.

Josh - hey cousin

me - he's your cousin

Josh - yeah, long story, related by marriage

me - oh

Josh - Yeah, his uncle married my uncle

me and brandon - AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Josh - I meant my aunt my aunt!

one day the Toilet Ducky's shall rise from the porceline god and take over the world -me

School is almost a beautiful jail- ashley

18-5FUCK (this one is kind of like an inside joke)...eighteen fifty-fuck...lol

IT WONT FIT -me ( you know when your trying to fit something into your bookbag and you yell that and realize what you said.. or your sick minded friend points it out)

a wise monkey never monkies with another monkies monkey

Constipated people dont give a crap... NO S*** SHURLOCK

there is a light at the end of every tunnel just pray it isn't a train

dont cry cuz its over.. smile cuz you got MAD PLAY woot woot

your best friend isn't always the one to bail you out... your best friend is who is sitting next to you in the cell saying "that was fuckin awesome"

all men are animals.. some just make better pets

practice safe s3x.. go screw yourself

if s3x is a pain in the ass then you may be doing it wrong!

i had some problems with being skitzofranik...but we are fine now

roses are red violets are blue im a skitzofranik and so am i

mess with me you mess with the whole trailer park (lmao)

*points at a guy with his shirt off* look mommy its a gurilla -me

wow... amazing.. i didnt know little doggies.. i mean you could talk and walk at the same time -me

i know your name... i know your phone number.. and i know where you live.. scared yet!? - me

yea thats all i have.... for now

lmao... anyways, here's another one i found in the depths of my computer

 

 

<Ed> Why is there so much fat porn lately? Someone needs to be shot.

<Rivorus> what the hell is wrong with fat porn?

<Toad> Yeah, I'm sure they all have great personalities.

 

EDIT: another one

 

Jesus: my girl mastrabates more then i do

Finque: seeing as how your girl is your hand, i'd like to hear you explain that one

Those two were just classical, great ones Isaac :thumbsup:

Haha I love reading quotes. I've heard a lot of the ones you posted from http://bash.org I love that site! Too funny so I won't post the ones from there.

I actually keep my funny conversations from yahoo and put them on my site. I have conversations with some of the weirdest people ever! I'll post some (I'm all_sugar_no_spice08).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alex (23:41:39): i had diarrhoea a couple of days ago

Alex (23:41:42): hehe

Alex (23:42:39): on my way to tthe bus stop i felt that i must go and relieve myself in sitting position

Alex (23:43:18): i couldnt hold out anymore and...

Alex (23:43:24): something bad happened

Alex (23:43:33): but there was no stain on my pants

Alex (23:44:02): fortunately

Alex (23:44:31): i had never had such an adventure before

Alex (23:44:59): you dont have to read this

Alex (23:45:16): if you consider this disgusting

Alex (23:46:53): i know that your psyche is weak when it comes to my stories

Alex (23:47:22): you can ignore me if you want, babe

Alex (23:47:44): i'll get over it bravely

all_sugar_no_spice08 (23:47:55): lol It's ok

all_sugar_no_spice08 (23:48:03): You just don't need to tell me about those kinda stories

all_sugar_no_spice08 (23:48:09): Keep the details to yourself

Alex (23:48:12): no

all_sugar_no_spice08 (23:48:13): and for the millionth time.

Alex (23:48:18): im very expressive

all_sugar_no_spice08 (23:48:18): DON'T CALL ME BABE!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alex (23:56:15): my cat got killed 5 years ago, but i won' t tell by whom

Alex (23:56:21): tell you*

all_sugar_no_spice08 (23:57:03): You killed your cat

all_sugar_no_spice08 (23:57:07): Damn! You murderer

Alex (23:57:26): yeah, indeed

Alex (23:57:42): but i still have a sister

Alex (23:58:08): a younger sister

Alex (23:58:47): she gets annoyed when i fart while standing next to her

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

War (00:08:09): for the last time im not gay

all_sugar_no_spice08 (00:08:09): They should do it for yahoo as well as irc

War (00:08:13): i dont fancy serge

War (00:08:14): jesus

all_sugar_no_spice08 (00:08:37): Holy shit, I never said you fancied Serge You saying it out of the blue means you do

all_sugar_no_spice08 (00:08:43): He is really that hott?

War (00:08:48): hell yes

all_sugar_no_spice08 (00:08:55): all_sugar_no_spice08: He is really that hott? w4r_m4ch1ne: hell yes

all_sugar_no_spice08 (00:08:56): )

all_sugar_no_spice08 (00:09:01): )

all_sugar_no_spice08 (00:09:08): )

War (00:09:11): man i can bring up a worse quote on you

War (00:09:14): so dont push it

all_sugar_no_spice08 (00:09:25): I've always had my suspicions about you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sam was high during this whole conversation I think lol. It was hilarious.

Sam (12:58:49): wait

Sam (12:58:56): are you a

Sam (12:58:58): cat 2

Sam (12:59:01): meow

all_sugar_no_spice08 (12:59:04): No

Sam (12:59:06): here kitty kitty

all_sugar_no_spice08 (12:59:09): I'm a girl.

Sam (12:59:15): fuck

Sam (12:59:22): so im not in the north pole

Sam (12:59:26): where am i

Sam (12:59:27): then

Sam (12:59:31): a cat stole my

Sam (12:59:32): bed

Sam (12:59:33): and im

Sam (12:59:36): hungry

Sam (12:59:39): are you my mom

Sam (12:59:57): all i want for christmas is my 2 frount teeth

Sam (12:59:59): not u

Sam (13:00:04): buzzz

Sam (13:00:07): noich

Sam (13:00:09): buzz

Sam (13:00:10): bee

Sam (13:00:11): bzz

Sam (13:05:17): ohh

Sam (13:05:49): sorry for uhh your incoveniousrs uhhh tommorrow i will be straight and will apolozise

Sam (13:05:51): i think

Sam (13:02:34): haha im male

Sam (13:02:38): and highh

Sam (13:02:43): i got a picture

Sam (13:02:48): of u dont belive me

Sam (13:03:05): truthfully are you my mom

Sam (13:03:08): sike

Sam (13:03:58): im sam

Sam (13:08:51): please santa girl

all_sugar_no_spice08 (13:08:57): I'm not santa lol

all_sugar_no_spice08 (13:09:03): My name is Jenny, Jen for short

Sam (13:06:46): im sam

Sam (13:07:08): uhh

Sam (13:07:14): hi santa

Sam (13:07:20): sorry i see santa

Sam (13:11:03): im sam

Sam (13:11:05): hahah

Sam (13:11:06): sike

Sam (13:11:11): i already told u that

Sam (13:13:40): omg

Sam (13:13:43): guess what

all_sugar_no_spice08 (13:13:46): What?

Sam (13:13:51): i have been eating paper

Sam (13:13:55): and its nice

Sam (13:14:00): mmmm

Sam (13:14:03): paper

Sam (13:19:22): i just wanted to talk but instead i made my self look like a fook head

Sam (13:19:49): uhhh wanna chat

Sam (13:19:51): im sam

all_sugar_no_spice08 (13:20:15): Lol

Sam (13:20:24): what did i do now

all_sugar_no_spice08 (13:20:27): I know your name is sam I get the picture

all_sugar_no_spice08 (13:20:30): You keep introducing yourself

all_sugar_no_spice08 (13:20:35): a million times lol

Sam (13:20:35): oh

Sam (13:20:36): lol

Sam (13:20:40): im sorry

Sam (13:24:44): awwww yeah

Sam (13:24:49): im sam

Sam (13:24:52): from

Sam (13:24:55): sam

Sam (13:24:57): is smsa

Sam (13:24:59): home

Sam (13:25:02): yeah

Sam (13:25:05): im just here

Sam (13:25:09): hey sam

Sam (14:02:38): can i hear your voice

all_sugar_no_spice08 (14:02:45): Umm, why lol?

Sam (14:03:04): because english chicks voices sound hot as

all_sugar_no_spice08 (14:03:32): lol

Sam (14:03:33): like i could be told about how to do a maths thing all fooking day aslong as the chick was english

all_sugar_no_spice08 (14:03:39): I like every other accent apart from ours

Sam (14:03:51): well i like u

Sam (14:03:57): spud

Sam (14:04:16): can u do me a faviour

all_sugar_no_spice08 (14:04:26): Lol

all_sugar_no_spice08 (14:04:28): What??

Sam (14:04:35): and say balls in the mic when u get it

all_sugar_no_spice08 (14:04:46): No lmfao

Sam (14:04:49): bollcoks

Sam (14:04:55): pleaseee

Sam (14:05:00): i will like do anything

Sam (14:05:01): lol

Sam (14:05:08): i will run my nabourhood naked

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I'm using my old I.d. Sherbetstrawberry02 by the way. "Gangsta" talk is always hilarious =D

sherbetstrawberry02: Yo yo yo!!!

social_pimp: who the fock are you

social_pimp: another E-slut?

sherbetstrawberry02: Your local brother g!!!!

sherbetstrawberry02: WUDDUP?!

social_pimp:

social_pimp: local brother?

sherbetstrawberry02: Hellz yeah. I'm like.... your bro man.

sherbetstrawberry02: Your best mate.

sherbetstrawberry02: Dont you remember me DAWG?!

social_pimp: thats a lame name...

sherbetstrawberry02: My name?

sherbetstrawberry02: Oh, it's my sisters.

social_pimp: haha

sherbetstrawberry02: My name is Bob Hi Juan!

sherbetstrawberry02: How iz yo?

social_pimp: @_@

sherbetstrawberry02: Wtf

social_pimp: I have no idea who are you

sherbetstrawberry02: @@@@@_

social_pimp: @_@

sherbetstrawberry02: Your gay. Because I know exactly who you are.

sherbetstrawberry02: Don't you remember me man?

sherbetstrawberry02: After that GREAT night we had together!

sherbetstrawberry02: Cummon man.

sherbetstrawberry02: I ain't that forgetable.

social_pimp: ROFL

social_pimp: i didn't touch shit nigga

sherbetstrawberry02: dont u remeber ma home boy?

social_pimp: No i don't

sherbetstrawberry02: yo so fly bro!

sherbetstrawberry02: cum u must must remeber me

social_pimp: So your name is rob?

social_pimp: or bob

sherbetstrawberry02: ? wtf?

sherbetstrawberry02: its micky

social_pimp: Aka bubba?

sherbetstrawberry02: cum on yo u must remeber me !

sherbetstrawberry02: yeh tis me yo!

social_pimp: Oh

social_pimp: I don't remember

social_pimp: lol

sherbetstrawberry02: wuddup home boy!

social_pimp:

sherbetstrawberry02: u remeber me thn yo?!

social_pimp: no

sherbetstrawberry02: aw cum on bro u must!

sherbetstrawberry02: cum on dawg!

social_pimp: *_*

social_pimp: You are lame dude

sherbetstrawberry02: wanna get to kno each uva yo! wana pimp out at mah crib yo?!

sherbetstrawberry02: no dude i aint lame

sherbetstrawberry02: cum on bro u must rember me!

sherbetstrawberry02: so wat u doin later dog?

social_pimp: i'm go to my gf's house

sherbetstrawberry02: ill cum with u yo!

sherbetstrawberry02: is yo girl hot!

social_pimp: pump that shit for a few hours then chill outside you know

sherbetstrawberry02: well ride in my banger

sherbetstrawberry02: we can pump tht shit togeva

social_pimp: nigga i don't share my pie

sherbetstrawberry02: yo dude dnt keep her to ur self dus tht mean shes a ugly bird?

sherbetstrawberry02: yooooooooooo!

sherbetstrawberry02: i aint down wit tht

social_pimp: nigga she fly, better then yo

sherbetstrawberry02: im a dog yo!

sherbetstrawberry02: no mans fly as me!

sherbetstrawberry02: yo im ur master G

social_pimp: oowerd yo, you ain't fly g your buttugly son

sherbetstrawberry02: nahh man no mans as fly as me yo!

sherbetstrawberry02: i gots da bling bling yo yo kno wat i mean my ghetto bruva

social_pimp: so why are you in ur sis account yo? that ain't cool

sherbetstrawberry02: my sis has sum fly frends yo!

sherbetstrawberry02: u aint down wit tht bro?

social_pimp: lol

social_pimp: anyways

social_pimp: Ima go eat yo

sherbetstrawberry02: ight

sherbetstrawberry02: gimme sum chickin fried rice yo!

social_pimp: and some grave soda ?

social_pimp: grape

social_pimp: lol

sherbetstrawberry02: yeh thts the shit yo!

lmao.. all of those quots are great

i also have one *not that funny but mheh*

me: my bike is fucked up.. i want a new one

nick: you can also write to pimp my bicycle to ask if they want to fix it

me: yeah that would help.. maybe they can fix my violin brakes.. *when i have to stop my brakes sound like violins..don't ask*

jroen: no.. then you can't join the local orchestra..

jroen: oh no wait you'll always have your bass left..

nick: oh and don't forget our triagle..!

me: okay okay! i know my bike's fucked up thank you =_='

nick: hail pimp my bicycle!

jroen: i still think you should join the local orchestra

we always have this weird humor =_=

lmao.. all of those quots are great

i also have one *not that funny but mheh*

 

me: my bike is fucked up.. i want a new one

nick: you can also write to pimp my bicycle to ask if they want to fix it

me: yeah that would help.. maybe they can fix my violin brakes.. *when i have to stop my brakes sound like violins..don't ask*

jroen: no.. then you can't join the local orchestra..

jroen: oh no wait you'll always have your bass left..

nick: oh and don't forget our triagle..!

me: okay okay! i know my bike's fucked up thank you =_='

nick: hail pimp my bicycle!

jroen: i still think you should join the local orchestra

 

 

we always have this weird humor =_=

lol that was hilarious, I wish I had been there

<whoreee> i just ordered the explosion self titled CD single?

<Weeve> what's it called?

hhahahha.. i've done that once or twice before! the people just look at me and stare... but that was like.. way back when... -cough-

lol that was hilarious' date=' I wish I had been there [/quote']

 

lol yeah we always have this weird humor..

 

i have one from my friend Mnoe:

*calling her parents but the line is engaged*

Mnoe: who the fuck is he calling with?

Nienke: ehh with the phone?

 

lol i thought that was hilarious!

okay here another one...

At class my foot was ichy wich was really annoying and it got worse

*there is a sort of cancer called Leukemie in dutch and my whole life I tought it was jeukemie* jeuk is dutch for itchy. So I sad I've jeukemie. Hybi: whaha wokay and then Mnoe: uhm when you have jeukemie are you itchy all the time??

Hybi: euh it's leukemie

Mnoe: oh ey yeah..is it??

<whoreee> i just ordered the explosion self titled CD single?

<Weeve> what's it called?

 

hhahahha.. i've done that once or twice before! the people just look at me and stare... but that was like.. way back when... -cough-

Haha, that one actually made me laugh out loud. Sounds like something I would say.. lol.

Well, my friends found out about my massive 'crush' thing on some girl at my school when I was wasted.. they were using her to make me do stuff, like lure me into places, for example. Yea...

Matt - Sigh. says:

i heard about how u lured me into the car too...

Matt - Sigh. says:

fucker..

says:

lol

says:

well it was that or taxi

says:

that u pay for

Matt - Sigh. says:

lol

Matt - Sigh. says:

janessa tried to get me to go to sleep at justins the same way

Matt - Sigh. says:

i should slap her.

says:

lol

says:

thats how i got u on the couch at his house

Matt - Sigh. says:

god dammit

says:

and into his house

Matt - Sigh. says:

fucking hell!!

Not incredibly funny. But again, it's all I've got. Worst thing is that I don't remember a thing from that night.