Heartbroken

Chester lay awake in his bed not even paying attention to his alarm clock blaring in his ears. A few minutes later he hears his dad yell" Turn that dang thing off!"OK!" yelled chaz. He got up and got in the shower. About ten minutes later mike called.Chester ran out of the shower to pick up the phone. "Hello." "So you actually think that you will go to school today"."Who wants to know." "Me and Dave."said mike. "Chaz wasn't always the kind of person who went to school even if he dose have to put up with the horable beatings he gets from his dad. He has the cuts and bruises to prove it. "I guse. I can't take the beatings any longer". said chaz. "I wouldnt be able to for one second".said mike. Yeah you are lucky you dont have to.said chaz. I'll call you later. Bye. When chester was just about to get back in the shower the phone rang again. "Hello." yelled chester."Didnt mean to catch you in such a bad mood. said dave. "Is it possible for me to actually take a shower?" asked chaz. "So you think that you can take the pain of actually going to school today.asked dave. Why dose everyone who calls me ask me that? Maybe becoause it has been 3 weeks scence youve gone to school.said dave. Fine,if it will make you any happier then you already are. I will go to school today." chaz said in a sad voice.:Good boy." "Shut the fuck up!" yelled chester. Bye. Chester went to the bathroom and finished his shower and then went to the kitchen to get his breakfast when the phone rang again. "Hello." "Hey chester." said mike. "What now." "Just wanted to know...If i was going to go to school today." "Yeah." said mike confused. "How did you nknow that i was going to ask you that?" "Because everyone else who called me asked me that." said chester. "And it is getting very annoying. said chaz.

Next chappie

Chester walked in and saw his friend Dave. "Whats up?" asked chaz. "Nothing much" said dave.Chester went to his locker and pulled out his science and math book.Chester turns around and sees the girl of his dreams. "Jenn". He stared at her not paying any attention to his friends question."Chester Chester. Snap out of it". Chaz was swept by her beuty. She had long brown hair and blue eyes. She probaly wouldnt even talk to me chester thought. All of a sudden the bell rings. Chaz went to his math class. "I am going to pass back your tests. Most of you did very well. Actually all of you did exept Mr. Bennington. F Mr. Bennington. So far you got all F on your math tests. I want everyone to bring this sheet home and bring it back tommorow with all the problems done. That includes you Chester. said chaz's teacher.Finally i am free from that beast. I bet if she could she would give me detention for getting to school early knowing her. Now i have to go to Mrs. I can give headaches to whoever is one second late. "i am so lucky i dont have her". says mike. Oh shutup. "Chestr Bennington" You are one miinute late. I had to go to the bafroom." he said in a baby voice. DETENTION". What> I was only one minute late coause i had to use the bafroom!" yelled chaz. Would you stop talking like a baby. It is bad enough i have to deal with three kids at home and now you. You just got everyone a pop quiz!" yelled the teacher. AWW! cried the class. OH SHUTUP!" yelled Chester.

Next Chapter

I am sorry this is so short. I will add to it later. I have to go or my brother will go into his world famouse temper tamtrome and hirt everhthing in his sight.

For Chaz, the day went by like any other day. More teachers giving him detention. Thats all they ever did. Chester, Dave, Jenn(Chesters girlfriend.) walked out the front doors of the school. "So, what are we doing tonight?" asked Jenn. "I geuess we could go see a movie." said chester. "What one?" asked dave. "Um Dave, Whyy dont you take your girlfriend to the movies." said Jenn."But but but but." whined Dave.

It is pretty good, but i think it is kinda hard to read dialogue like for instance:

"I wouldnt be able to for one second". Yeah you are lucky you dont have to. I'll call you later. Bye. Hello. "hey chaz". It was Dave

Like where it says Bye. Hello u have to put the indacation the phone rang again. I didnt know when they started talking and where they ended. And also i didnt know ho was saying what, lol.

But anyway, I like it and it sounds promising! I think if u fix those things, it would be easier to read. I didnt mean to offend, but it is just a little advice! ^^; ttyl, bibi

like Fainting_LP_Fan890 said this story is really great n i cant wait for more but it would be alot easier if u did what Fainting_LP_Fan890 asked u to

thanks u post more

Next chappie. 1 month later. Just so you know Jenn is chazs girlfriend now.

Chester woke up to his alarm clock blaring in his ears. Automaticly he shot up and turned it off before his dad yelled at him again. That was the last thing he wanted. His drunk dad yelling at him. The Phone started ringing Chaz went to pick up the phone. Hello. "Hey chazzy chaz." It was Jenn. "You think you would like to come over after school?" asked Jenn. "After, why not right now." "Because my parents don't raelly like it when i have people over when school starts in ten minutes." "Thats stupid." Well i guesse i have to go now." "Loveya." "Bye chester." "Seeya." Chester quickly took a shower and did his hair. Just when he was walking out the door the phone rang. Chaz went and got the phone. Hello. "Whatsup Mike" "How did you know it was me?" "Its called callerid." "I was going to call you earleir but i sortof got cought up in somthing." "And i literly mean i got cought in somthing." "What do you mean you got cought in somthing." "It wasnt my falt." "My stupid sister is a master mind in setting traps." "You should know chester." "She cought you in her net that she hung from the sealing." "How did she get that there anyway." asked chester. "Like i said, she is a master mind in setting traps. "Well is that all or were you going to tell me somthing alse besides your sister who has a crush on me." "Yeah i needed to tell you that we have a new kid in school and he is in love with jenn." "What." yelled chester. "I will kill him if i ever see him staring at her or talking to her." "Wow, lighten up chaz." "Your right i shouldnt worry about it." "I really have to go mike." "Whatever." "Seeya." Chester shot out the door. When chaz got to school the bell just rang when he got to his locker. He quickly grabbed his math book and ran down the hall to get to his class. "Well well mr. bennington." "Late again."yelled chazs teacher. "Sorry, ill be sure to make sure my friends dont call me to tell me that the new kid likes my girlfriend." "I have know idea what you just said but this is what i am going to say." "Detention." "Huh. Ill add that to my score." "Just sit down." "Ok class, today i want you to finish your assighnment or you can sit up here and do some equations till your mind pops out cause it is full of equations." "I cant beleive this new teacher." I got nine detentions cause i was one minute late." whined chaz. "You might as well sleep here for heaven sakes." said mike. "But then i would have to stand her even longer then my ass can take." said chester.

nEXT CHAPTER

Chester was so happy today was saterday. He got up and took a shower. "I guese i will go to jenns house today until i get sick of her parents yelling and screaming just like my parents." thought chester.By the time he got to jenns house her parents were already fightining.She was screaming about how she knew that he was cheating on her because she found lipstick on his shirt. When he got up to jenns room he saw that she had cuts and brusies on her arms and face. "What hppened jenn?" asked chester. "I should have known not to do what i did so my mom wouldnt have to get in this so they wouldnt fight. "What did you do?" "I dont want to talk about it." "At least not now." "Ok." said jenn with a sniff. "I would of hoped that you wouldnt find out about this." "I hoped not until i was old enough to get in so much trouble that i get a huge woopen." said jenn. "I just came over to ask you if you wanted to go to the movies but i geusse you cant because you seem to have your hands full with somthing." "I guesse i could just ask mike." "Ill be fine to go chester." said jenn. "Are you sure about that because when my dad did this to me i.... Oop. Shit yelled chester. "Your dad beat you to?" "Yes." said chester in a quite voice. "W hy didnt you tell me?" asked jenn worryingly. "I didnt want any one feeling sorry for me." "Lets just drop that subject ok! yelled chester. "Fine but the next time any of our parents do somthing like this we should tell eachother." aid jenn. "so what movie are we going to see chester?" "What ever is in the theater." "Lets get a move on then." They walked to the theater hand in hand. After they got done watching the movie they went back to jenns house to find it totally trashed. "What happened hear?" "Take one guese. "Your parents did this?" "They always do when they get in fights after i leave to go somwhere." "Yesh." said chester. "Well you want to go upstairs and do somthing?" asked jenn. "You know it.

Next chappie

They went upstairs to find something very disturbing. "Oh my god!" yelled Jenn. What Jenn saw was her mother, lying on her bed, not breathing. "How did this happen." said Chester. "Take a lucky guesse." said Jenn. Jenn ran downstairs to get the phone and dial 911. After she did all that she went back upstairs. "I know their fights were bad but I never thought that they would go this far." Jenn said. Tears started running down her cheeks. "Jenn, I am so sorry." said chester. Jenn just stoodthere, shocked. She couldn't believe this. The ambulance came and took her mother to the hospital. Jenn and chester sat in the waiting room. Jenn was rapped in his arms. She was crying softly so noone could here her. "Which one of you is Mrs.Andrews duaghter?" asked the docter. "I am." said Jenn. "Well, your mother is currently in a coma. We have no exact time or day she will wake up. When she does, we will call you." said the docter. "Thank you." said Jenn.

Next chapter

Jenn and chester got a ride from a cab back to Jenns house. They walked up the stairs and into the house. "Jenn, it will be ok. Your mother will wake up from that coma. She is a stong women." said chester. "I know. I just dont know how my father could do such a thing. I know he has done some bad stuff in the past but nothing like this." said Jenn. They sat on the couch for a little while. Suddenly, Jenns father came in the house. "Jenn, what are you doing here you little whore!" yelled her father. From the sound of his voice and the way his eyes lokked she could tell he was drunk. She imediantly ran towards the door. Chester ran out with her. "My father is always drunk. everytime he gets drunk he finds somthing to blame on me and give me beatings." she said as they were running down the street to his chaz's house. "My dad was like that to. He was drunk all the time and would do all that shit to me." said chester. They got to his house and went up to his romm. Jenn was worn out from all that running. Chester lived about 4 miles away. Chester let Jenn have his bed. Chester slept on the floor with a sleeping bag and a pillow. In minutes, they were both sound asleep.

but but but WHY??? I WAS SO WAITING FOR THAT STOY HOW COULD U

''ok calm down''*talks to herlself* just plz tell me that ur joking n u r gonna add more chapters U CANT END IT LIKE THAT i mean look at it poor lp assocition's story u really broke it heart no wonder u called it heartbroken and if ur gonna stop it bcuz of the rules dont u worry u can start writing it again on http://www.lpfiction.com im wating dont give up ur story is really good and I love it

but but but WHY??? I WAS SO WAITING FOR THAT STOY HOW COULD U

''ok calm down''*talks to herlself* just plz tell me that ur joking n u r gonna add more chapters U CANT END IT LIKE THAT i mean look at it poor lp assocition's story u really broke it heart no wonder u called it heartbroken and if ur gonna stop it bcuz of the rules dont u worry u can start writing it again on http://www.lpfiction.com im wating dont give up ur story is really good and I love it

Nice joke

But anyway...

The story is good, but I'm afraid it's really hard to read, for me at least. I can't pick out who is saying what. I'm not being mean, I'm trying to be helpful With some more punctuation and paragraphing the story could be really good.