Here ya are TJ... A favor.

wez

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 19, 2006
Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration. They believe that they're superior to others and have little regard for other people's feelings. But behind this mask of ultra-confidence lies a fragile self-esteem, vulnerable to the slightest criticism.

Narcissistic personality disorder is one of several types of personality disorders. Personality disorders are conditions in which people have traits that cause them to feel and behave in socially distressing ways, limiting their ability to function in relationships and in other areas of their life, such as work or school. In particular, narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by dramatic, emotional behavior, in the same category as histrionic, antisocial and borderline personality disorders. Narcissistic personality disorder treatment is centered around psychotherapy.

Narcissistic personality disorder symptoms may include:

-Believing that you're better than others
-Fantasizing about power, success and attractiveness
-Exaggerating your achievements or talents
-Expecting constant praise and admiration
-Believing that you're special
-Failing to recognize other people's emotions and feelings
-Expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans
-Taking advantage of others
-Expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior
-Being jealous of others
-Believing that others are jealous of you
-Trouble keeping healthy relationships
-Setting unrealistic goals
-Being easily hurt and rejected
-Having a fragile self-esteem
-Appearing as tough-minded or unemotional


Although some features of narcissistic personality disorder may seem like having confidence or strong self-esteem, it's not the same. Narcissistic personality disorder crosses the border of healthy confidence and self-esteem into thinking so highly of yourself that you put yourself on a pedestal. In contrast, people who have healthy confidence and self-esteem don't value themselves more than they value others.

When you have narcissistic personality disorder, you may come across as conceited, boastful or pretentious. You often monopolize conversations. You may belittle or look down on people you perceive as inferior. You may have a sense of entitlement. And when you don't receive the special treatment to which you feel entitled, you may become very impatient or angry. You may also seek out others you think have the same special talents, power and qualities ? people you see as equals. You may insist on having "the best" of everything ? the best car, athletic club, medical care or social circles, for instance.


But underneath all this grandiosity often lies a very fragile self-esteem. You have trouble handling anything that may be perceived as criticism. You may have a sense of secret shame and humiliation. And in order to make yourself feel better, you may react with rage or contempt and efforts to belittle the other person to make yourself appear better.



It's not known what causes narcissistic personality disorder. As with other mental disorders, the cause is likely complex. Some evidence links the cause to a dysfunctional childhood, such as excessive pampering, extremely high expectations, abuse or neglect. Other evidence points to genetics or psychobiology ? the connection between the brain and behavior and thinking.


Risk factors:

Narcissistic personality disorder is thought to be uncommon, affecting less than 1 percent of people in the United States. It affects more men than women. Narcissistic personality disorder often begins in early adulthood. Although some adolescents may seem to have traits of narcissism, this may simply be typical of the age and doesn't mean they'll go on to develop narcissistic personality disorder.

Although the cause of narcissistic personality disorder isn't known, researchers continue to learn more about the factors that may increase the risk of developing the condition. These risk factors may include:


-An oversensitive temperament as a young child
-Overindulgence and overvaluation by parents
-Excessive admiration that is never balanced with realistic feedback
-Unpredictable or unreliable caregiving from parents
-Severe emotional abuse in childhood
-Being praised for perceived exceptional looks or talents by adults
-Learning manipulative behaviors from parents


Check out the rest here bud... Mayo Clinic.. don't get no better than that.. Good luck, my friend.

Narcissistic personality disorder - MayoClinic.com
 
Narcissistic personality is characterized by behavior or a fantasy of grandiosity, a lack of empathy and a need to be admired by others. Narcissistic personality has a pathological unrealistic or inflated sense of self-importance, has an inability to see the viewpoints of others, and is hypersensitive to the opinions of others.


Hope it helps TJ.. seriously.. not intended to "attack you"... Perhaps there's no nice way to say it.. and from experience, I know you'll take it as an attack and search high and low for some validation that you are indeed better than anyone and everyone, or else.


Try something different this time.. like facing a mirror like a man. And taking the huge stick out your ass like Emkay suggested.. seriously. You hurt no one but yourself.. and most likely your children.. do it for them if not for yourself.. Not many recover, I understand, and usually go to their death bed in this sad condition.. Don't let that happen to you..
 
And here's something for those who have to deal with someone like that... A boss, boyfriend, girlfriend, husband, wife... They're everywhere.. Give them nothing.



Are you Walking on Eggshells with Jekyll & Hyde?

NARCISSISTIC PERSONALITY DISORDER

A Learning, Resource and Support Group
We invite you to join us as we share our experiences and reclaim our lives from the devastating effects of the narcissist.



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


You are not alone...

"I didn't know another human being could be so cruel, manipulative, deceptive and twist reality so much and just walk away like nothing ever happened. It has left me questioning myself, who I am as a person, fundamental laws of reality and life itself."

"I mourn the loss of what could have been and what should have been and the realization that he will never be any different. It's quite shocking to realize you wasted a whole year of love and time and money on someone who never really cared about you because they can't. It hurts! I hate it too. I'm still spending alot of time trying to understand and deal with the pain"

"I lived a decade with an N. Anything he did was only done if he reaped some recognition/attention reward for his own popularity with our friends. Behind closed doors the craziness continued until I thought I was going to lose my mind. He would twist and turn my words, his logic made no sense but that never stopped him. My point is some people are culls, dont bother trying to change them, dont change yourself to suit them. If you're in a relatioinship with one. GET OUT -- RUN HARD RUN FAST and never look back because that face you once cared for is only a farce, its a ploy to keep you as a plaything."


"When I read his emails they made me melt. He was articulate and well versed, something I loved in a man. To make a long story short, for many months life was bliss. He was a gentleman, appeared to be responsible, kind and very generous. I wanted a responsible man, a man that did not lie, a man that can talk AND listen to a woman. I wanted a man that had a conscience, was REAL. I thought I saw this in him. Then it started..."


"Eventually, you will come to the painful realization that you were nothing more than an instrument of their self gratification, then we're as easily discarded as a piece of gum that's lost its flavor."


"You are dealing with a totally delusional human being, who builds his own fantasies about his reality and believes his own pathological lies. How can you possibly hope to have a healthy relationship with someone who bases his whole existence on deceit? IMPOSSIBLE! And don't kid yourself - They know exactly what they are doing - They prey, victimize, and devastate."


"My councillor said he was a psychopath and would not change. She said men like him keep her in work because of women like me, ahhh sad but true."

"I spent 7 years with my N, trying to recapture the first 3 months, and yet it’s only today that it occurred to me that the first 3 months were NOT who he was; the rest of the time was!"

"As human beings, we cannot grasp evil so cold. We just cannot imagine this whole part of our lives that was so important, was a big nothing. A big sick lie. When it's over, we will be forgotten like yesterdays trash."

"I have both a therapist and psychiatrist, and both helped me see how I gravitate toward men without consciences because I was raised around them. In fact, I was willing to look the other way for this guy precisely because I grew up looking the other way"

"I believe I've been to Hell and met the Devil..."

"If you want genuine heartfelt advice from one of the many on this forum who have had their entire lives destroyed on every level - emotionally, financially, or psychologically: BE AFRAID, BE VERY AFRAID!!!! RUN LIKE HELL AND NEVER LOOK BACK!!!!"

"I would say my biggest weakness is a heart that is too compassionate; and a high level of tolerance of nonsense."

"Even now I find it difficult to fathom how you can give so much of yourself to a person and have them so totally wipe it all away as if it never happened with no remorse and go on their merry way leaving a path of destruction behind them."

"I'm mourning the myth of what I thought was reality. I wanted it to go back to like when we first met. He was so charming,humorous and complimentary---unlike any guy I ever met. He found me at a vulnerable time. My ego needed a boost. But even in the midst of this charm, there was also this gut feeling that something was not right..."
_________________________________________________________________

Hmmmm.. sounds familiar.. Don't be stupid, like myself.. They really are this way. A trip to a psych ward is the prize.. If you're lucky, that is, for when confronted, they will threaten your life and could kill you without a shred of emotion, like a doctor cutting away a cancer and will stop at nothing to stop you from getting free from them and telling the truth. Truth and losing control of another is their kryptonite.. How sad.

When my ex-girlfriend told me she was gonna shoot me between the eyes at the end for merely telling the truth.. I believed her, cause she meant it.. At that moment she'd rather I was dead than free from her.. Sick sh t. The worst part is death woulda been preferable at that point, and didn't give a sh t what she threatened.. I was done. Twenty years was more than enough.. see ya, wouldn't wanna be ya..




NARCISSISTIC_PERSONALITY_DISORDER
 
I find that 1% hard to believe.. I'm no psychologist but only know from experience.. Much more common than 1% as I think anyone who does this sh t is narcissistic to a certain degree, and equal in men and women despite those statistics. Men are more apt to be identified with this behavior because unlike women, men have no where to turn for help and support with abusive women.. Women are also more apt to talk to a friend or family about their situation where men are more likely to never say a word and internalize it.. After I realized I was the worlds greatest enabler, leaving was easy..


hahahaha.. Notice in this even, it always assumes women are the only targets of control freaks. Far from the case. Sexist bastards. :D


Does any of this sound familiar? If so.. know it doesn't get better til you get the hell out... only worse.


Spousal abuse and battery are used for one purpose: to gain and maintain total control over the victim. In addition to physical violence, abusers use the following tactics to exert power over their wives or partners:


Dominance
— Abusive individuals need to feel in charge of the relationship. They will make decisions for you and the family, tell you what to do, and expect you to obey without question. Your abuser may treat you like a servant, child, or even as his possession.


Humiliation
— An abuser will do everything he can to make you feel bad about yourself, or defective in some way. After all, if you believe you're worthless and that no one else will want you, you're less likely to leave. Insults, name-calling, shaming, and public put-downs are all weapons of abuse designed to erode your self-esteem and make you feel powerless.


Isolation — In order to increase your dependence on him, an abusive partner will cut you off from the outside world. He may keep you from seeing family or friends, or even prevent you from going to work or school. You may have to ask permission to do anything, go anywhere, or see anyone. Source: Domestic Abuse Intervention Project, MN


Threats — Abusers commonly use threats to keep their victims from leaving or to scare them into dropping charges. Your abuser may threaten to hurt or kill you, your children, other family members, or even pets. He may also threaten to commit suicide, file false charges against you, or report you to child services.


Intimidation — Your abuser may use a variety of intimation tactics designed to scare you into submission. Such tactics include making threatening looks or gestures, smashing things in front of you, destroying property, hurting your pets, or putting weapons on display. The clear message is that if you don't obey, there will be violent consequences.


Denial and blame
— Abusers are very good at making excuses for the inexcusable. They will blame their abusive and violent behavior on a bad childhood, a bad day, and even on the victims of their abuse. Your abuser may minimize the abuse or deny that it occurred. He will commonly shift the responsibility onto you: Somehow, his violence and abuse is your fault.


Abuse — The abuser lashes out with aggressive or violent behavior. The abuse is a power play designed to show the victim "who is boss."


Guilt — After the abusive episode, the abuser feels guilt, but not over what he's done to the victim. The guilt is over the possibility of being caught and facing consequences.


Rationalization or excuses
— The abuser rationalizes what he's done. He may come up with a string of excuses or blame the victim for his own abusive behavior—anything to shift responsibility from himself.


"Normal" behavior — The abuser does everything he can to regain control and keep the victim in the relationship. He may act as if nothing has happened, or he may turn on the charm. This peaceful honeymoon phase may give the victim hope that the abuser has really changed this time.


Fantasy and planning — The abuser begins to fantasize about abusing his victim again, spending a lot of time thinking about what she's done wrong and how he'll make her pay. Then he makes a plan for turning the fantasy of abuse into reality.


Set-up — The abuser sets up the victim and puts his plan in motion, creating a situation where he can justify abusing her.




One big neverending circle.. A total joy.. not. I know I aint the only one who lived/is living through this sh t.. Good luck to any and all in reclaiming your life from a sick individual.. I know it aint easy.


Domestic Violence and Abuse: Signs and Symptoms of Abusive Relationships
 
wez said:
Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance and a deep need for admiration. They believe that they're superior to others and have little regard for other people's feelings. But behind this mask of ultra-confidence lies a fragile self-esteem, vulnerable to the slightest criticism.

Narcissistic personality disorder is one of several types of personality disorders. Personality disorders are conditions in which people have traits that cause them to feel and behave in socially distressing ways, limiting their ability to function in relationships and in other areas of their life, such as work or school. In particular, narcissistic personality disorder is characterized by dramatic, emotional behavior, in the same category as histrionic, antisocial and borderline personality disorders. Narcissistic personality disorder treatment is centered around psychotherapy.

Narcissistic personality disorder symptoms may include:

-Believing that you're better than others
-Fantasizing about power, success and attractiveness
-Exaggerating your achievements or talents
-Expecting constant praise and admiration
-Believing that you're special
-Failing to recognize other people's emotions and feelings
-Expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans
-Taking advantage of others
-Expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior
-Being jealous of others
-Believing that others are jealous of you
-Trouble keeping healthy relationships
-Setting unrealistic goals
-Being easily hurt and rejected
-Having a fragile self-esteem
-Appearing as tough-minded or unemotional


Although some features of narcissistic personality disorder may seem like having confidence or strong self-esteem, it's not the same. Narcissistic personality disorder crosses the border of healthy confidence and self-esteem into thinking so highly of yourself that you put yourself on a pedestal. In contrast, people who have healthy confidence and self-esteem don't value themselves more than they value others.

When you have narcissistic personality disorder, you may come across as conceited, boastful or pretentious. You often monopolize conversations. You may belittle or look down on people you perceive as inferior. You may have a sense of entitlement. And when you don't receive the special treatment to which you feel entitled, you may become very impatient or angry. You may also seek out others you think have the same special talents, power and qualities ? people you see as equals. You may insist on having "the best" of everything ? the best car, athletic club, medical care or social circles, for instance.


But underneath all this grandiosity often lies a very fragile self-esteem. You have trouble handling anything that may be perceived as criticism. You may have a sense of secret shame and humiliation. And in order to make yourself feel better, you may react with rage or contempt and efforts to belittle the other person to make yourself appear better.



It's not known what causes narcissistic personality disorder. As with other mental disorders, the cause is likely complex. Some evidence links the cause to a dysfunctional childhood, such as excessive pampering, extremely high expectations, abuse or neglect. Other evidence points to genetics or psychobiology ? the connection between the brain and behavior and thinking.


Risk factors:

Narcissistic personality disorder is thought to be uncommon, affecting less than 1 percent of people in the United States. It affects more men than women. Narcissistic personality disorder often begins in early adulthood. Although some adolescents may seem to have traits of narcissism, this may simply be typical of the age and doesn't mean they'll go on to develop narcissistic personality disorder.

Although the cause of narcissistic personality disorder isn't known, researchers continue to learn more about the factors that may increase the risk of developing the condition. These risk factors may include:


-An oversensitive temperament as a young child
-Overindulgence and overvaluation by parents
-Excessive admiration that is never balanced with realistic feedback
-Unpredictable or unreliable caregiving from parents
-Severe emotional abuse in childhood
-Being praised for perceived exceptional looks or talents by adults
-Learning manipulative behaviors from parents


Check out the rest here bud... Mayo Clinic.. don't get no better than that.. Good luck, my friend.

Narcissistic personality disorder - MayoClinic.com


Yep Its this or psychopathy, but I'd put my money on this.
 
wez said:
They're everywhere..

Psychopaths - those suffering from psychopathy are indeed just about everywhere. The worlds leading authority on this disorder is Dr. O'Hare from the university of British Columbia I think.

Psychopathy is also known as sociopathy

One man in three is affected. The figures are slightly better for women at one in five. They are convincing actors. The best give away, is their constant lying, where you see someone lying, even where there is no need to lie- beware.

The link takes you to a list of symptoms:






Profile of the Sociopath
 
emkay64 said:
I think it's more about the syphilis.

Well, ya know, you may have something there....


Tertiary Stage

Serious effects of the spirochetes' activity of the latent stage begin to appear. This stage can be characterized by damage to the heart, eyes, brain, nervous system, bones, joints, liver, or other organs. This can result in mental illness, blindness, neurologic and cardiovascular problems, and even death.
 
Narcissistic personality disorder symptoms may include:

-Believing that you're better than others
-Fantasizing about power, success and attractiveness
-Exaggerating your achievements or talents
-Expecting constant praise and admiration
-Believing that you're special
-Failing to recognize other people's emotions and feelings
-Expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans
-Taking advantage of others
-Expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior
-Being jealous of others
-Believing that others are jealous of you
-Trouble keeping healthy relationships
-Setting unrealistic goals
-Being easily hurt and rejected
-Having a fragile self-esteem
-Appearing as tough-minded or unemotional


Have a great day! :) ;) .. lol.. :) ;) .. hugs .. lol
 
[quote name='TJ's Ignore List']Jump on board.[/QUOTE]

... to TJ's wonderful list!
 
Narcissistic personality disorder symptoms may include:

-Believing that you're better than others
-Fantasizing about power, success and attractiveness
-Exaggerating your achievements or talents
-Expecting constant praise and admiration
-Believing that you're special
-Failing to recognize other people's emotions and feelings
-Expecting others to go along with your ideas and plans
-Taking advantage of others
-Expressing disdain for those you feel are inferior
-Being jealous of others
-Believing that others are jealous of you
-Trouble keeping healthy relationships
-Setting unrealistic goals
-Being easily hurt and rejected
-Having a fragile self-esteem
-Appearing as tough-minded or unemotional
 
"Soon to be added"

"Have a nice day"

"Hey fatty"

???
I do believe that someone is trying to set me up....
 
When you have narcissistic personality disorder, you may come across as conceited, boastful or pretentious. You often monopolize conversations. You may belittle or look down on people you perceive as inferior.

You may have a sense of entitlement and when you don't receive the special treatment to which you feel entitled, you may become very impatient or angry. You may also seek out others you think have the same special talents, power and qualities ? people you see as equals.

 
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