Reasons we should invade .... If we wanted world domination

This is just a post of EXCUSES. I think we should examine each of the countrys and think of EXCUSES to invade them and create an occupation and assume government control...Your choices are....

 

Afghanistan

Albania

Algeria

Antigua

Argentina

Australia

Austria

Azerbaijan

Bahamas

Bahrain

Bangladesh

Barbados

Belgium

Belize

Bolivia

Bosnia and Herzegovina

Botswana

Brazil

Bulgaria

Burma

Burundi

Cambodia

Cameroon

Canada

Chad

Chile

China

Colombia

Congo

Costa Rica

Cote D

You lame cunts can't even manage a six mile road from Bhagdad to the fucking airport. Get over yourselves. Fucking hopeless. Go bomb some developing country that has no ground-to-air defences to raise your hopes again.

 

Fucking retards.

 

And why start with Poland, phreak?

 

You got issues with some Polack?

 

Big list. Can I pick a favourite?

 

I'll pick New Zealand. Because those Maori fuckers will chill the shit outta your steroid-stoked negroid marines.

 

http://www.discoverdownunder.com/wetini.jpg

Any nation, my reason is:

Because they fucked my sister and bragged about it to there mates, whore!

You lame cunts can't even manage a six mile road from Bhagdad to the fucking airport. Get over yourselves. Fucking hopeless. Go bomb some developing country that has no ground-to-air defences to raise your hopes again.

 

Fucking retards.

 

Yeah, if we wanted to have a successful military campaign, one that we could surely win and make the USA feel good about stopping the bad guys, we need to invade Mexico!

 

That's right, Mexico, our next door neighbor to the South. Then, export all of those little fuckers to Guantanamo Bay in Cuba. In fact, let's just export all of the Mexican's to Cuba. Much easier that way and hey, they don't have to learn a new language to get by.

 

Then we could build beautiful beachfront properties for America's wealthy, on the lovely beaches of Mexico.

 

Yeah...that's it. Invade Mexico.

 

I'll pick New Zealand. Because those Maori fuckers will chill the shit outta your steroid-stoked negroid marines.

 

http://www.discoverdownunder.com/wetini.jpg

 

I'm sure not afraid of any bloke who has rings on his fingers and bells on his toes and a bone in his nose - Ho Ho.... (nods to Ray Stevens...)

 

Then we could build beautiful beachfront properties for America's wealthy, on the lovely beaches of Mexico.

 

Yeah...that's it. Invade Mexico.

 

Noooooooooooooooooh, anywhere but mehico. How am I gonna enjoy my winter holidays to sunny mehico with all those rich yanks jacking up the prices every-fucking-where?

 

Go North, young man. Skip the Canucks and see if you can't conquer Alaska, agin.

Noooooooooooooooooh, anywhere but mehico. How am I gonna enjoy my winter holidays to sunny mehico with all those rich yanks jacking up the prices every-fucking-where?

 

Go North, young man. Skip the Canucks and see if you can't conquer Alaska, agin.

 

The only reason to invade Canada is if we run short on food supplies, but then again, they're not very tender and they certainly don't taste like chicken!

Venezuela would be a good one... they have oil, and the bastards are getting it for pennies on the dollar at the pumps too..

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I say we invade Australia. There is a dim-witted moron that goes by the handle "builder" who should be seized and donned a jesters cap and forced to perform court tricks at all whitehouse functions.

Venezuela would be a good one... they have oil, and the bastards are getting it for pennies on the dollar at the pumps too..

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That's coincidental. The Eyerarkees were paying about 12 cents a gallon, but that was back before liberation.

 

I say we invade Australia. There is a dim-witted moron that goes by the handle "builder" who should be seized and donned a jesters cap and forced to perform court tricks at all whitehouse functions.

 

You cunts don't pay enough, and your annual leave sucks the big one.

Well, I think if we are gonna take the Mid east, we should send a special forces team into Turkey to sieze control there for the impending Iran invasion.

 

I guess logically, if you think about it, we could totally play out a real scenario of how to rule the world..

 

And that's basically what I created this rant about..

 

For sure we could overtake Mexico and Canada, it would be a matter of letting them meld with us and taking away the borders and making them states.

 

I mean, if you gonna take over the world, wouldn't you think it would be smarter to capture soil that you do not need to fly or sail to get to first ??

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Yeah, if we wanted to have a successful military campaign, one that we could surely win and make the USA feel good about stopping the bad guys, we need to invade Mexico!

Yeah...that's it. Invade Mexico.

Making Mexico a state is really not a bad idea. If we bought Mexico, we wouldn't have to worry about the fact that they are invading us. No more boarder patrol problems. They are a hard working people, which is more than I can say for some Americans. Though it is a little nasty in some areas, I think Mexico could be a great asset.

I guess logically, if you think about it, we could totally play out a real scenario of how to rule the world..

And that's basically what I created this rant about..

It's called RISK, and it's a great game.

Countries we should invade IF we wanted to dominate the world... The west that is... The US's best days are far behind us.. only an effort by the whole of the estern world could work...

 

Saudi Arabia - Control the worlds oil, and you control the world

China - Cheaper labor than Mexicans and they are willing to learn Engrish! And they are loaded with resources too! Win - Win!

Africa - Loaded with resources, and populated with people who do nothing but walk barefoot over them and complain about health problems when thier activities are causing them... easy to conquer!

France - Corner the Cheese market! (and Whine)

Germany/Japan - Only country with enough balls to fight us man to man... we need to watch these guys!

Italy - Put a stop once and for all to those HORRIBLE looking suits! Many of my relatives would be killed, be we all have to make sacrafices, right?

After we "recieve" Mexico and Canada, we should probably look further South. After all, if we control the Americas, we control quite a bit of the world. And where would Castro be? Sitting in a courtroom cussing at a judge. And then we could look to the East...don't want to touch Russia...they have nukes. May not want to hit China either...you know the old saying: "Give everyone in China a knife and march them in any direction, they could take over any country." So we don't hit them with the Miritary...we hit them with Nucrear Bombs! After that, we look towards Japan...they are a small group of islands that need more craters and more Americans with guns. Then, we basically take over Eurasia, avoiding any Russian soil you can. Then you dominate the Middle East, and after such, move to Europe. They need more Americans with guns, too. Then, and ONLY THEN, you would take over Russia. You would not do this with a Right-Wing bible-thumper as president, as the whole world would be named "Jesusland". There you have it! A very vague way for TOTAL WORLD DOMINATION...maybe it would work.

Invade japan. NO MORE FUCKING ANIME GEEKS. UGH!!

 

Then Invade Australia. Why? because I hate them, and they belong in concentration camps

 

After that we throw nukes at the following cities: Vatican, Jeruselam, and mecca. NO MORE FUCKING RELIGIOUS WACKOS

 

And then we ANNHILATE all of the carribean and mexico. Fucking tropical shitholes.

 

And while we're at it, INVADE JESUSLAND (the southern U.S) to continue the eradication of backwoods hicks and religious nuts.

 

...speaking of backwoods hicks, head to Canada and nuke Saskatchewan and Alberta.

 

And then Invade BOLIVIA. Impose a minimum wage, safe working conditions and NO MORE FUCKING SLAVE LABOR.

Two points you will choose to avoid. Japan and China have your economy by the balls. They have the power to plunge your paper-based economy into the shitter, permanently.

 

Second, Australia and Japan have your southern hemisphere surveillance systems by the balls. We simply swictch you off, and take all your geek troops hostage. It was a while ago now, but Pine Gap "research facility" was almost crippled by a few well-organised hippies with some bomb experience.

 

Stick to actual possibilities, like Mexico. Fuck with Canada, and their goes your alliance with England. They fucked you over in 1812, remember? The call then was that all your troops had to do was march over the border, and all the Canucks would be cheering your arrival. ROFL

 

Presumptious pricks. Iraq is a failure. All hail the mighty military machine.

If we assimilate the Mexicans, Guatemalans, etc.. everything down to panama... thats a nice chunk of real estate to grow our own tropical fruits with a cheaper price over importing it...hmm.. I always wanted my very own banana grove...

 

But anyway, I would think before taking Canada, we would need to gain ICELAND and GREENLAND first to secure us a position for the European strike.

 

The U.S. forces would need to possibly occupy both Britain and Canada at the same time... France will then surrender (as usual), as will Spain.... Greece might prove difficult if we dive into the realm of Islam, so we need the dutch first to help with them...

 

Yeah, we would defiantly need to take out the DUMBER countries first before fucking with the slant eyed fuckers.

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Two points you will choose to avoid. Japan and China have your economy by the balls. They have the power to plunge your paper-based economy into the shitter, permanently.

 

Second, Australia and Japan have your southern hemisphere surveillance systems by the balls. We simply swictch you off, and take all your geek troops hostage. It was a while ago now, but Pine Gap "research facility" was almost crippled by a few well-organised hippies with some bomb experience.

 

Stick to actual possibilities, like Mexico. Fuck with Canada, and their goes your alliance with England. They fucked you over in 1812, remember? The call then was that all your troops had to do was march over the border, and all the Canucks would be cheering your arrival. ROFL

 

Presumptious pricks. Iraq is a failure. All hail the mighty military machine.

 

Both very valid points....

Strongly ally yourselves with the UK and India to begin with. Gather any other support you can to eliminate North Koreas nutcases and sieze their nuclear arsenal. Create a seeminly Islamic based terrorist group in France to cripple the government citing that they're supported by Pakistan. Another quick coup will be needed, military control is essential here. Saudi Arabia is still a key one, kick their asses and make Isreal/Egypt babyset for the time. Trade with Canada would need to be increased quickly but a we would have to depend on you almost entirly so you could keeps us by the balls when we start gettin uppity about you forign policy.

 

With puppet governments in both France and Pakistan as well as perhaps direct control (or atleast military control) over former North Korea you can invade China, feel free to use viral warfare beforhand to demoralize their population quickly, and economic blockades are helpful (Human rights violations are a good excuse, not to mention they're commies) This is the hardest part so support from your Allies would have to be total (make sure India is willing to go though with it however you must). Once you control China its all down hill. You've a massive population to work with and a mojor competitor down.

 

Then comes Russia, the government isn't terribly strong so covert work would probably be a better option here as well rather then direct invasion right off the get go. Next comes betrayal. Take your pick of India or the Brits, use the other along with your accumilated power to make mince-meat of them then do the same to the other.

 

For those of you paying close attention, you've finally knocked off the worlds nuke-nations. Being in control of this ultimate weapon you need only to wipe out a few wiener nations (Beleze and South Africa prehaps) and the rest of the world will know you aren't fucking around and will have no option but to surrender or make futile efforts against which you may vaporize. Theres the odd chance of a few nukes surfacing and the US suffering a couple of bites yourselves but theres a price to global domination now isn't there?

Eisnabt. For one, the US and Britain are already pissing in eachother's pockets.

 

India has no pockets, so the US is selling off all sorts of old military hardware to them, and to their arch enemies, Pakistan, who were staunch allies in the cold war, and agents for the transfer of cash to the taliban, up to and including the 911 fiasco.

 

Saudi Arabia owns more US real estate than you could poke a stick at, and their financial fingers are in more pies than every grandma in the country could bake in one weekend.

 

Israel is calling the shots in more sectors than anyone would be comfortable with, and Egypt's gov is a replica of Maine's layabout council. Just waiting for orders.

 

North Korea is closely allied with Russia, Iran, and China, and that is the reason why diplomatic "talks" have fallen down the scale of things Bush must do. Much easier to bomb some indefensible nation.

 

Just admit that this is a game for you, and you clearly have little information relevant to the topic.

Sorry Eyesinbutt, gonna have to go with builder on that, you need to be political, as well as have a strong army to do it, nukes COULD be an option, but one would suppose world domination would also include changing cultures in other regions, not just throwing a flag on the enemies soil and claiming ownership.

 

Nazz' concept is actually more legitmate, then for one to think a great army wins the game of world domination.

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Both very valid points....

 

Well thank-you FA. I was starting to think everyone had me on ignore.

If I was gonna take over the world, I would start by taking out the guys who are NOT enemies..

 

AFRICA

 

That whole continent could be easily wiped out by disease and lack of medication... hell see how many fucking AIDS cases there are in Africa ??

 

World domination could start by ignoring there needs and letting them all die out from aids and starvation.

 

Take over Africa, you just got yourself a nice piece of real estate, tons of resources, and a gain in your wealth factor... your no longer playing the food stamp game with the African population, less people to feed in the world, so you have helped your own resources as well as gained more..

 

Hmm... I would bet by wiping out Africa's population and taking control of it, one would have a controlling interest in the world.

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I wasn't being terribly serious, I somehow doubt theres anyone who could formulate a real workable plan for global domination and I readily reconize that direct military action would be horribly inpractical and far too costly in any real attempt that could be made. Also, considering the time required to conquor the globe one could not possibly account for the innumerable changes economically, politically and envrionmentally that would happen because of and indepentent of any action of war taken. All plans that have been presented are based on current global conditions and could be applicable to a small handful of states that would be first targets, but the rest of the globe would be changing drastically while the initial events were underway. If you really wanna conquor the globe then just burn all the coal you possibly can, lay waste to all old growth and rain forests, dump toxic wastes in all majour fresh water sources and wipe out everybody in the process.

 

As for you Afrika plan Phreak, good luck bringing political and religious stablility to the region.

 

I'm just a fan of Rise of Nations is all.

Simple is best. Slow and methodical, get everybody hooked on ANY given product that nobody needs but everybody wants. Implant this product with some sort of chemical version of a permanent "salt peter" sterilize and ultimately neutralize any potential opposition and also get a couple bucks out of the deal. McDonalds has a pretty good foothold in the global community, maybe we just slip a little sumpn sumpn into those double cheese burgers. Also just for fun, we could send all illegals ie. mexicans etc. to the middle east and let them do what they do.

Simple is best. Slow and methodical, get everybody hooked on ANY given product that nobody needs but everybody wants. Implant this product with some sort of chemical version of a permanent "salt peter" sterilize and ultimately neutralize any potential opposition and also get a couple bucks out of the deal. McDonalds has a pretty good foothold in the global community, maybe we just slip a little sumpn sumpn into those double cheese burgers. Also just for fun, we could send all illegals ie. mexicans etc. to the middle east and let them do what they do.

 

Brilliant! I love it!

 

Lets put birth Control In outbound cans of Coke!

 

BRILLIANT ! ! !