Restaurant etiquette 101

I work in a middle to upper class restaurant, and I see people (pillars of society mind you) acting like total and complete apes....SO here is a guide for you (and possibly to be debated...) And i had a crappy night tonight so i thought id share.....and i have many many stories as i have been in this business for 9 years

 

Treating anyone in a restaurant as below you is wrong. Most of them are going to school to be your boss. Becarefull of how you act

 

Expecting to be before anyone else as you are waiting for a table is absured..because you will be upset (and frankly bitch) when someone who came in after you gets one before you...right?

 

Tipping between 11-14 percent is an insult. Period

 

Tipping 10 percent and under is downright cruel.

 

Acting like a snotty bitch/bastard is a sure fire way to get your meal late, and get the worst of everything. Especially since the server automatically thinks you arent going to tip based on your demeanor.

 

Being nice and understanding your server wants to give you great service and do everything they can for you is a sure fire way to get everything done perfect the first time! (Most servers will even get you free stuff for being nice or give you tips or honest opinions on the menu) And if something isnt perfect the server will do everything in their power (including consulting management to get soemthing for you or even get your stuff for fee because you are nice and understanding)

 

Saying "im a big tipper" right when you sit down usually means you arent...

 

Sitting in your talbe for more than an hour and a half and undertipping is the biggest insult you can possibly do. Servers look at each table as their Buisiness property. And sitting there longer than that is wong. Unless you are willing to compesate for it. We dont sit at your job and waste your time and resources on chatting about your new baby now do we?

 

Something comes to your table and it isnt quite what you ordered, expected, or has something you said you didnt want on it? 90% of the time its a 1-2 minute fix...we WANT to fix it for you. keep that in mind. Remember we live on your tips. We will do ANYTHING |we can to fix it or even get it for your for free. Acting like a total ass gets us to not want to help you or even so much as go to your table any longer. It also isnt always the servers fault it was wrong..sometimes the cooks forgot...not your server...and undertipping because of this hurts...

 

If you can afford a 20 dollar filet...you can afford a 15-20% tip...Remember your server has to tip out 1-3 people based on their sales (in my case..1% to the food runner, 1.5% to the bartender...and 2% to the busser...your not just ruining your servers day..but 2-3 others)

 

asking for something with, say, no onions, no this, no that is totaly fine...we want to make you happy. But reading the menu, making your decion and getting your food and seeing something you didnt read and throwing a fit about is totaly uncooth....shame on you! (we will still fix it...but leave the fit out....you didnt read it on the menu)

 

Didnt get your refill fast enough on your 7th coke? Look to see other tables your server is waiting on. Some restaurants make the server wait on 10-20 tables at a time....That is hard work (fortunately i never have more than 5). Its not their fault..it is what the manager is making them do......Hence why Perkins(and their kin) are used to small tips. On that same note when you make 100 demands on (in need this, i need that, wheres this) every time the server walks by you are making another table wait for things they asked for...

 

 

 

( my post was too long....oops...so ill have to make 2)....but here we go...continued to next post!

 

If a server is "weeded" (meaning has too many tables or just got 5 tables sat at the same time and is having trouble keeping up) they are working their ass off try to catch up and UNDERSTAND that they arent getting to you right away. If they are being a total lazy ass and would rather chat with co-workers...then yes...undertip them...they dont deserve it!

and the very UGLY truth about customers in a restaurant...is your category. If you belong to one of these categories and tip like a normal human being in this country then i am truely sorry. (i look at at every one of my tables as someone i want to do my best at and dont prejudge...but...sorry to say i am in the minority on this one...after all i want to give everyone the bennefit of the doubt...and in our culture that is rare) This list is WHY you may get bad service at any place you dine out...it is an ugly truth because this is the norm. I see it every day and hear everyone in my industy bitch about it...and here is why (and explanations, and in no particular order)

 

A)Old People: They take forever to order (and thats fine really)...but then they get their food and they try to tell you how to make it better. Unfortunately managers, cooks, etc dont listen to it and dont frankly care. Old People tip very poorly and order the cheapest things and sit at your table forever. It doesnt mean they arent nice people...usually they are.. But when your old and nasty...you have already been written off as a bad tip and a time consuming pain in the ass

 

B)Black People: (keep in mind im not a racist, unless it comes to the "thug culture") Black people are by far your worst customer in all way shapes and forms. They typically dont like anything they are given...nothing is done quite right. and they seem to want something for free. From the Well-to-do blacks to the "i hope they dont dine and dash ones" I myself waited on an extremely wealthy Vikings football player (make that 2...i live in minnesota) and got tipped 10%.....Im not a football fan and didnt know who i was waiting on till one of the managers was drooling at me to figure out what was going on. Either way they got extremely good service (without me being intruding or asking for autographs or anything). They both got free stuff and everything done perfectly. Yet this ass left me a 10% tip...Go to hell. But back to your regular customer..... They also ask for every pain in the ass things you can ask for (lemon in the water, lime in the diet coke, extra this extra that...and they may be a pain but we are happy to do it....providing we are going to get compesated because WE have to do it and go out of our way to get it for you). Nothing is spicy enough, or this was too spicy. All in all this kind of table makes us give our other tables less service because we have to walk to the ends of the earth for them. Usually the table starts off very nice and polite and then turns ugly because something tiny didnt turn out right...and ugly i mean i fear for my life. But there are sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo many nice people in this category that tip (somewhat average) that i am happy to wait on. I see a table of black people sit in my table and i cringe...buti still try to give them everything they want...and sometimes im supprised and get a great tip and feell good about myself...then do the same and get a crappy one and feel my faith in humanity has done me in. But i will NEVER give any of my tables bad service because of a stereotype.....unfortunately most servers will. MY personal theory on why this category tips this way is because there arent that many black servers and they dont understand that is their livelyhood....and got the courage enough to ask a fellow server (who is black) why that is.....and only after they said "i just hate waiting on black people" (i was floored to hear a black person say that about black people) and i just asked "is that because black people dont server much"? She said "kinda, black people dont wait tables much because they dont want to act white"...im still baffled on that one..because she is fabulous and i love working with her.....But hey what can you do!

 

C)Women: Ahh yes the 2 women ordering salads and water with lemon...you are always a joy! and your 11% tips is fabulous....STEREOTYPICAL RESPONSE AHEAD...CAUTION. So your day of shopping on your husbands money you dont want him to think your being tooooo extravengent..lets give ther server less money....and get those darling shoes. SCREW YOU. This type totaly suprises me....especially since the restaurant service industry is typically dominated by women...and always has been. I understand a womans metabolism isnt as equal to a mans...so ordering less is fine...quite understood....but to be a pain in the ass and ask for everything under the sun to compensate and under tip...whatever. A typical woman order is; this salad with the dressing on the side (then order more because it wasnt enough....why did you order it on the side then? order extra dressing) To be fair...women are very nice to wait on and i always find it a joy. But when you get less than a 15% tip you get a very let down feeling.....

 

D) High school Kids: Oh the delight. We are a 12 people and order 3 meals...and 2 deserts and want all the water and bread that is free. Sharing food is always expected.....You are SUCH a joy. High schoolers usually dont even tip...but luckily you usually come in packs of 8-20 and we can charge you gratuity. You chug your drinks and want refils all night long. Take up 3 tables and annoy every paying customer around you. (prom season is the BEST...sarcastically) Getting 2 "kids" who know how to handle themselves, tip appropriately, and handle themselves like adults makes me VERY proud!..i love you!

 

E)Asians: This group orders the closest thing to asian culutre..but hates it (orange chicken, cashew chicken...etc). They are actually very easy to wait on, doesnt ask for much (literally..usually water and wants to share a dish) Even tho you are low maintenance...it still is not right to undertip. I hate myself for writing this section up because bad things are quite minimal..but it is a stereotype that is a pain to wait on because eating the food takes forever...and taking a table for 1-2 hours to share one dish and guzzling water certainly doenst pay my bills... (remember im willing to take the chance that you arent stereotypical and will give you the best service to my ability!)

 

F)Foreign visitors: Asking the question "what would you like to drink" and getting a table of people responding in a foreign accent makes you cringe. They are from a country that the tip is included in the meal. So they dont tip well at all...and sometimes not at all. I personally love other countries and cultures so i dont totaly mind. But I DO mind when other countries get pissed off about americans not respecting thier way of life and intruding (as they put it)...and not learning about their culture before visiting and insulting them...yet they cant provide the same courtesy? I still give them great service.....but am 100% let down in this area. I have never gotten a descent or even GOOD tip from this category. With the exception of someone from this coutnry running back into the establishment saying "they arent from here and dont get it" and giving me more money kinda thing...

 

 

G)White Trash: Yes comming into a restaurant and wearing your t-shirts dating back to the 80-s or older is a great thing. you scream the loudest and want everytyhing for free. You make your servers life miserable and do everything from every stereotype list above and are NEVER happy...and you take it out on your server....i have not much nice to stay to you or even want to make any excuse for you. ORder your food to go and go away!

 

 

To reiterate....i still give all my tables the best possible service i can within my power. I have no autority to give ANYTHING away for free(even when things go wrong) but will do anytying, and i mean ANYTHING, i can to make you happy. I am working for my tip and that means making you happy. If you cannot afford a tip...or want to tip the least possible amount you can then you need to only dine at someplace like dennys or perkins (and those people probably work harder than i do....so i feel tripple sorry for them)....

 

 

I enjoy to hear the response on the other side of the table....or to hear what makes people the dictator they are sitting at the table!

Hmm...

 

Having waited tables and been a bartender, I have my own opinion on this and it differs from yours.

 

1. I never assume a tip is deserved, ever. It must be earned, each and every time. Tipping has been somehow perverted from a reward for EXCELLENT service, to a "you simply owe me 20%-25% or you're a cheap bastard" scenario. You seem to further this misconception regarding tipping.

 

When I go into a restaurant, I expect good service. That is why I am going out to pay 300%-800% more for food which I could prepare myself at home. I expect that this huge premium in food cost includes at the very least, courteous, efficient, correct service. When I receive exemplary service, I tip accordingly for the EXTRA effort made by my server.

 

2. I am not responsible for the income of the bussers, the bartender, and the runners. They are responsible for their own needs. If they don't make enough money at their jobs, go back to school, and get a higher paying job or work somewhere where they pay more money. It's that simple. Claiming that I should tip more to you just because you have to tip them out, is absurd. Get a grip.

 

3. Getting an order right, is a basic responsibility of the kitchen, BUT ensuring an order is right BEFORE bringing it to the table, is the SERVER'S responsibility. Remember, you're striving for EXCELLENT service to JUSTIFY your reward, take the moment every time to scan over the food and ensure it is correct, before taking it out to the table. After getting burned by the kitchen in my first week of working in a restaurant, a very wise OLD waiter, who every customer loved, took me aside and explained this concept to me. After that, I NEVER brought to the table, something that wasn't prepared EXACTLY as I had wrote the kitchen ticket as. IF it needed correction, I made the kitchen correct it right then and there. This is one of the marks of a professional server! I blame the SERVER every time for food delivered incorrectly prepared. It demonstrates to me that you don't care and that you are just a food conveyer system.

 

4. I will never understand servers who bring out 1 or 2 meals of a 4 or 6 top, and then 5 minutes goes by before they bring out the other meals. Patrons are then forced to make stupid niceties like "go ahead and eat while it's hot" to their dining companions. This is the ultimate in rudeness and it is not the kitchen's fault, it is the servers. The server should make sure that all of the table

I guess when you have a party of ten or more the whole "tip for excellent service" goes out the window. They already attach the 15-per to the bill.

I agree. If they don't earn it they flat fucking don't get it!!

I've worked in a resuraunt so i know what goes on in the kitchen, all the waiters do is complain about all their tables and repeat over and over,"this table better give me a good tip". Since i know that i know how fake they are and that they dont really care if you like the food, or even if you like them all they care about is the money and with that kind of attitude I say fuck them all, you get 5 dollars, and if you suck you get the change in my pocket including the lint.

I rarely tip. To me you folk are doing your fucking job. I deliver packages in a little brown truck and I never get tipped. Sure I make more money than the average waitress, but don't bellyache to me when junior is hungry. Learn to fucking type.

 

For that reason, I eat out once a blue moon and the local restaurants are a better place.

I rarely tip. To me you folk are doing your fucking job. I deliver packages in a little brown truck and I never get tipped. Sure I make more money than the average waitress, but don't bellyache to me when junior is hungry. Learn to fucking type.

 

For that reason, I eat out once a blue moon and the local restaurants are a better place.

I payed for your meal throw in your fucking buck like everybody else.

I payed for your meal throw in your fucking buck like everybody else.

 

Too much truth in Mr. Pink's "anti-gratuity" rhetoric.

Too much truth in Mr. Pink's "anti-gratuity" rhetoric.

There is that..........Personnaly, if I feel like I can spare a few bucks I tip, that is if the service was tip worthy. Otherwise I just try to be considerate by not slopping up the table and not being a pain in the ass for the wait staff. The truth of the matter is, if your current job is not doing it for you then take the steps required to put yourself into one that does. Otherwise learn to do without.

Disclaimer...i had a VERRRRRRYY bad night the night i wrote that post..and didnt think i deserved any of the tips i got that night......but let me respond to this post as it was the only intelligent one posted....

 

Hmm...

 

Having waited tables and been a bartender, I have my own opinion on this and it differs from yours.

i seriously doubt it does. It is my job and frankly my career..i take waiting on my tables VERY seriously...to the fact that i look at it as my real estate and want NO ONE to be unhappy no matter how i feel about about them..no matter the tip...i just am unhappy when im tipped badly when i dont deserve it...if i did a bad job i fully admit it and deserver the bad tip......

 

1. I never assume a tip is deserved, ever. It must be earned, each and every time. Tipping has been somehow perverted from a reward for EXCELLENT service, to a "you simply owe me 20%-25% or you're a cheap bastard" scenario. You seem to further this misconception regarding tipping.

my average tip is about 20%...because i am good at what i do and am on top of everything...but you cant be on top of everything at all times. Im just stating that customers dont always realize that being in a restaurant is a team effort...and when something goes wrong it is always the servers fault..and frankly (usualy isnt). But they are the ones who get the penalty for it even when it isnt their fault. Bartenders (and i bartended for 6 years) are out there and you can tell when it is their fault. In the kitchen no one knows....(even when it is the servers fault...but it is ALWAYS assumed it is the servers fault)

 

When I go into a restaurant, I expect good service. That is why I am going out to pay 300%-800% more for food which I could prepare myself at home. I expect that this huge premium in food cost includes at the very least, courteous, efficient, correct service. When I receive exemplary service, I tip accordingly for the EXTRA effort made by my server.

which is why im in the top 10 in my restuarant ALWAYS for service, comps, voids, and compliments. We have 97 servers (as of yesterday) and i think thats quite a feat.....and 40 have been there longer than i have....

 

2. I am not responsible for the income of the bussers, the bartender, and the runners. They are responsible for their own needs. If they don't make enough money at their jobs, go back to school, and get a higher paying job or work somewhere where they pay more money. It's that simple. Claiming that I should tip more to you just because you have to tip them out, is absurd. Get a grip.

Why should someone go to school to get a better job. I did...and hated it....I am doing what i love and look at it as a carreer....im looking to move up and do everything in my power to do so. SO far in fact that the managers ask me questions when the genreal manager isnt there....I plan to move up! (after all the GM's company car in my company is a BMW and their salary is QUITE HIGH)

 

3. Getting an order right, is a basic responsibility of the kitchen, BUT ensuring an order is right BEFORE bringing it to the table, is the SERVER'S responsibility. Remember, you're striving for EXCELLENT service to JUSTIFY your reward, take the moment every time to scan over the food and ensure it is correct, before taking it out to the table. After getting burned by the kitchen in my first week of working in a restaurant, a very wise OLD waiter, who every customer loved, took me aside and explained this concept to me. After that, I NEVER brought to the table, something that wasn't prepared EXACTLY as I had wrote the kitchen ticket as. IF it needed correction, I made the kitchen correct it right then and there. This is one of the marks of a professional server! I blame the SERVER every time for food delivered incorrectly prepared. It demonstrates to me that you don't care and that you are just a food conveyer system.

Well that was certainly true in the other 2 restaurants i worked at...but not this one. The first restaurant was 13 tables and one cook...the 2nd was 30 and 2 cooks...easy. Either way i kept an eye on everytyhing constantly because it was easy. NOW i work in a restaurant with about 200 tables. 8 stations and about 20 cooks. It doesnt always work out they way you want it. I still look to see whats cooking and figure out if everything was going okay. I look around and figure out what is going on to the best of my ability. If something goes wrong i have a manager to go to to tell my table that something is wong and it is going to take a while. The first 2 restaurants i worked at i had to take all my food out. This time around im too busy trying to meet all the times and points my job tells me i have to(its a corporate restaurant..so i have SOO manythings to worry about. Im my last 2 restaurants i had more regular customers than i could shake a stick at (other servers didnt like it because they usually got shafted and lost tables because of it). NOW i almost never get them because im either not there or they didnt know i was there

 

13 table restaruant i worked at they only had 2 servers

30 table restaurant i worked at they only had 4 servers

200 table restaurant they have 97 servers (and we are short because the patio opened today and now we are short 10 servers )

 

The bigger the restaurant the less customers that ask for you there are. But a promise you i get more compliments walking out the door than half of the other servers at my current restaurant.

 

4. I will never understand servers who bring out 1 or 2 meals of a 4 or 6 top, and then 5 minutes goes by before they bring out the other meals. Patrons are then forced to make stupid niceties like "go ahead and eat while it's hot" to their dining companions. This is the ultimate in rudeness and it is not the kitchen's fault, it is the servers. The server should make sure that all of the table

5. Any server who cannot answer any question about any item on the menu isn't worth a shit to me. It is your job to know the fare inside and out. You should know portion sizes, ingredients, and preparation methods STONE COLD. I used my employee meals wisely and had everything we served at least one time. I paid for many excluded menu items, so that I would know them personally. You should also know EXACTLY what you believe to be the very finest meat, poultry, pasta, salad, and seafood dishes which are offered and be enthusiastic in being thought of so highly by the patron in that they trust your judgment. I always felt honored when somebody gave me the privilege of assisting them in their selection and I made EXTRA sure that what I recommended came out of the kitchen PERFECT - EVERY TIME. I developed a reputation with my clients and they respected me and ASKED for my tables. THIS IS THE HALLMARK OF WHEN YOU ARE A PROFESSIONAL SERVER, WHEN CLIENTS ASK FOR YOUR TABLES. THIS IS THE SECRET TO BIG MONEY!

I have been at my job for almost 2 years....the restaurant before was 4 years..the one before that was 3 years. Each one i knew the ins and out...but still would get a question here and there that i wasnt 100% sure on because people will ask things out of the ordinary. Rather than lie and be wrong i would rather tell them to hold on for 1 minute (and usually less) then be wrong....but thats just me. And if my server did the same id be much happier (most of us would). There are SOOOOOOOOOOO mnay little things most servers dont know or didnt realize...and an honest server is better than the latter. My menu i work with is 255 (or so ) menu items. I cannot be expected to know how much salt is in this pasta, or that something is spicy (and you dont think so but they do because they think garlic is a hot spic...hardly)...You have to think of everything and try everything....and i have. I warn against everything in my arsinal that i can...even if i think they will like it.. You cant predict everything....

 

6. Show some class and actually know the wine list and the beer list. I paid a good portion of my income in the first 6 months purchasing glasses of wine, and such, just so that I could be intimately familiar with them. I kept notes and reviewed them. Be prepared to make VALID suggestions of wines to complement the meal. It's called UPSELLING and it is the key to job security and increased income for you and the restaurant, and you cannot do it successfully if you don't know what you are recommending. If you don't know anything about wines, go to the library or internet and read. I am amazed to this day servers who don't know the basic differences between Cabernet, Merlot, Syrah, Chardonnay, Chianti, lagers, pilsners, ales, etc. You should also query the bartender when time permits, and KNOW the most popular drinks and what is in them. When I tended bar, I LOVED servers who took the time to find out what was what and knew how to recommend properly. Good for them and good for me. This is your profession, BE PROFESSIONAL.

Upselling is a tacky thing..and i never do it. Americans believe what they tell you (unfortunatly) and im not about to tell them that the 10dollar glass of wine will tast better with their grilled cheese than the 5 dollar one. Im honest and sincere...and that is what i believe what people want. (and the same goes for if they order a filet or a ribeye or a pasta......they want you to be real..not a robot....nor a server who looks down on them if they dont know what they are doing. I drink wine and know alot about it. My current clientelle just wants to know if the cheapest pinot grigio or the cheapest chardonnay is the best......its not brain surgery (my last job was a snitzy itialian restaurant and wine was top of priority...and frankly we dont cary the cream of the crop there...) but i still know what im doing. And no matter HOW Much training or where you work isnt going to give you the psychic ability to figure out what wine they are going to like....period! I know what i like...and i know what my customers like.....i know what my fellow servers like and i tell all of my customers all 3 sceneros and let them choose. I draw from personal experience (from all 3 areas...me, customers, and friends/coworkers)....If you say 100% that you like this wine(dish) and push and push that that is what they want...and you get ONE customer that just hates it....your screwed and feel like total shit!

 

 

7. Your uniform and its condition tell me everything about you. My uniform was IMPECCABLE and my shoes were PERFECT. I was starched, pressed, and ABSOLUTELY stain free. Even my waist apron. ALWAYS. I made it my mission in life that my hair, skin, fingernails, teeth and breath were PERFECT and I was always perfectly shaved. I never wore cologne and always wore anti-persperant/deodorant. I ate a Tic-Tac every hour whether I need to or not. Every day I went to work, I looked like I was on a job interview for a 1 million dollar a year job. I always got the BEST customers, the BEST tips, and had the BEST time as a waiter and bartender because people RESPECTED me because I RESPECTED myself and honored them with my attention to detail. They in turn, honored me with their $$$ in the form of EXCELLENT TIPS. Not because they had to, but because they VALUED me and considered me THEIR Waiter! It used to piss the other servers off, when they would go home with $50-$100 a night and I would consistently clear over $175 and many times over $300 a night.

Welp u just described my philosiphy in this area...apparently i didnt make that clear in my first post......I usually get made fun of because i leave the restaurant with a nearly white self as i waked in (we wear white shirts, white pants, white shoes, white aprin...and a tie). BUUUUUT once in a while that darn iced tea pitcher spillson you and stains it.....or your carrying 5 plates to run into the back to box up for your customer and they slopped something on the side you didnt notice...(and its usually in the early parts of thhe night) so the later customers think you a slob....its a job hazzard really!

 

 

Perhaps I'm different in this regard, because I was TRAINED by a very OLD and WISE waiter. He had waited tables in the same restaurant for over 30 years, and all the staff bitched about him because they thought he was hard nosed and "old fashioned". I'll tell you something, next to the owner, he was the highest earning employee in the place, and even Kay, the owner, commented that he earned almost as much as she did!

Actually we are not...thats why i am bitching. Perhaps because i went from working 8ish years in small locally owned restaurants and being total stars...to working in my first corporate owned restaruant and being one of the stars and getting bad tips for no good reason. If i fucked up i never bitch about getting a bad tip (or even being stiffed) i understand these things.....But you should understand people want everything for free in a restaurant when something goes "somewhat" wrong....that is not right. If something goes TERRIBLY wrong..then yess things should be comped or even the entire meal taken off the bill.....But for a 30 second to 1 minute fix you would think we would be understanding that things go wrong because they want your meal to be correct...tasty and the way it should be??!

 

right?

 

for further reading i work here..

 

http://www.thecheesecakefactory.com/menu.htm

 

Im still learning the menu and i have worked there for almost 2 years AND am an expiditer and know what things look like when they are cooking and know many of the recipies and because of that job even cooked many items.. With that many things its easy to forget a thing or two.....but id rather have someone double check or rethink themselves and check in the back for 1 minute than to be wrong and get some nasty dish you didnt expect? WOuldnt you...hell id tip higher because they decided to be 100% sure...Unless you were in a hurry i spose...but isnt that what mcdonalds is for?

 

 

 

His words of wisdom, still ring true to me today... "Be a Professional in everything that you do, and the money will take care of itself!" He was absolutely right!

he is totaly right..and that is what i do...are you implying that thats not what im doing then? You could be the best server in the entire world..with all the time and all the help in the world and you will always encounter the problems i shared in my first posts.....

 

Now being a bartender and a server SUUURELY you can agree to that. Humanity has let me down SO many times in this area. I dont expect a 20% tip...but anything less than 15% when i havent done an exceptional job surely lets you down......

Even now, I've been scoping out sites and plan to open my own little restaurant here, and I know that I'll get it done right and I'll teach my staff what Tony taught me.

I spose getting WAY over tipped (200%) on a check that 6 old ladies wrote to my restaurant...(and we dont take checks but they decided to drop it off and rush off) and i cashed it...and called the number on the check the next day to explain that i think they left far too much is not good service. I drove 1 hour out of my way to give the money back....I have chased people out of my restaurant who left things behind that they surely wanted ( birtday cards, money, credit cards, state ID's, and even something as trival as their stupid mall recipts of their clothing). I am on the top of my game...and always have been. I am NO slacker and think of my customers first. NO mater what stereotype they fall in and want all of my customers to have fun. Hell to some customers im a stand up comedian, im a stand offish food runner, im a food informant, a socal insight, i play games, dont play games...im everytyhing my customer wants....even if its not true. If its what my customer is digging for in a server..I am. I said it earlier...if i screwed up and didnt deserve the tip...im aware of it and accept it. Its when a customer acts out of control i dont agree with it. Most other companies, jobs, or services do not go out of their way to please the customer the way a restaurant ever does. And NONE takes the fall or looses money or gives things away the same way a restaurant does. Its those customers that EXPECT IT...when something minor goes wrong i have a problem with. (you should know...EVERYONE is working to fix..or to stop it from happening). It just cant always be helped. and usually it isnt your servers fault...(even if they are in the back looking out for you). But the server always gets hurt for it. (and because they have to tip other peope out...they REALLY get hurt for it).

 

Its a humanity thing really....people just dont seem to have it with the service industry...especially since the service industry WANTS to help...they just wnat something for free...or to just plainly be an asshole because they dont know how to be one elsewhere

 

 

 

 

Sorry for the multiple posts...im not fond of them...but i had alot of catching up to do and responding in this one!

 

Sorry and good day!

...are you implying that thats not what im doing then...

 

...but anything less than 15% when i have done an exceptional job surely lets you down......

 

I corrected your writing from "haven't done" to "have done"...I think that's what you meant to say.

 

Not at all! I think you are well grounded but you worry about the tips to much. One thing I learned about when I tended bar and worked in restaurants, is I never counted my individual tips. Ever. In fact, when I tended bar, I worked in a Country Western Bar, I took every tip and slid it off of the bar and onto the floor. I worked all night amidst the money at my feet. After the bar closed, and the patrons had left, I quickly tossed all of the moeny into a bucket, and took it home with me and counted it the next morning. I never let the tips dictate how I was going to feel while at work. Plus, if for some wierd reason (which was VERY rare, the tips were overall less than average, it didn't bother me so much in the morning while having my coffee and reading the paper and I couldn't remember "who" to be mad at.

 

Good luck to you in your corporate work...I always favored private held restaurants myself. I hate corporate rules and politics...

Well i am no literary mind...really. My spelling, frankly stinks...but im not embarresed by it.

 

ANYHOW

 

Of course i worry about my tips so much. Thats why i give the best service i can possibly give...because i worry about them. When i get a bad tip I didnt deserve...i get mildly upset. It sorta take it personal. Just because some people stereotypically tip lousy doesnt mean im not going to give the best i can ....I love it when people act outside of their box (or not stereotypical if you will) and cheer them for it...

 

Weather im in a small local restaruant or a big corporate chain. I have always prided myself on being competent, caring, and the best. But customers dont always care about that and i find that very sad.

 

I prefer to work in a private owned restaurant myself...you have much more freedom and can act accordingly and be yourself. I cannot always act that way now...but still am in the top of my game. It is my "career" and i like doing it. Most people cant say that....

 

Sure i groan about people and my tables but i still enjoy it. I did the "real job" thing..and hated it....thats why i went back...

 

My entire point of my thread was in the service industry you get a better idea on how humanity ( or the lack there of) is these days. And it is a scary thing...

No, I was only pointing out my intrepretation of what you were saying so that I could appropriately respond and that you would understand my response. No harm intended!

 

I don't care about your spelling. I can read your posts and I can figure out your intent with relative ease. Relax.

 

I think you have got it together as I said before, and I wish you nothing but the very best for you!

 

All I can say is "Don't let the one or two "Oh Shit's" wipe out the numerous "Atta Boy's".

well normally i dont...but i had a VERY bad weekend where my tip average was about 12 percent...and thats the average...

 

Had nothing but nasty people all weekend long...i felt the need to vent

 

I can handle a table or two undertipping when the service didnt warrent it...but all night...it tends to wear on your nerves!

Vortex, If you don't like your job GET ANOTHER FUCKING JOB! Quit whining about people not "tipping" go work in a factory somewhere where "tipping" is not a consideration... better jet join the local union so you won't have to work at all, just draw a paycheck and do your part to bankrupt america!

i say if you do the job well (and it sounds like you do) than you deserve the 20% tip, me, i only have one real restraint in my area, the service is grate and if i can afford it i always tip at around 18% (im usually poor) Ive had really good service (and i mean unbelievable excellence) before though so Ive tipped at around $35 for a $50 meal, but thats only if its a really good experience.

Vortex, If you don't like your job GET ANOTHER FUCKING JOB! Quit whining about people not "tipping" go work in a factory somewhere where "tipping" is not a consideration... better jet join the local union so you won't have to work at all, just draw a paycheck and do your part to bankrupt america!

 

I like my job alot. I did the "real job" thing and hated it with all my being. Even went into depression. A doctor actually gave me pills (never took them)...i decide to go back to what i loved.

 

I mentioned earlier i had a VERY VERY bad day and decided to explain "What pisses me off" and make a thread about it. But what better industry is there that people actually use constantly....i was just also using social commentary from the other side of the table!

 

WHo has a job that they actually dont bitch about....in any aspect.

 

And no thanks...I dont want handouts from society...nor do i want to create a social problem when i dont need it

 

I appreciate your concern tho

"3. Getting an order right, is a basic responsibility of the kitchen, BUT ensuring an order is right BEFORE bringing it to the table, is the SERVER'S responsibility. Remember, you're striving for EXCELLENT service to JUSTIFY your reward, take the moment every time to scan over the food and ensure it is correct, before taking it out to the table. After getting burned by the kitchen in my first week of working in a restaurant, a very wise OLD waiter, who every customer loved, took me aside and explained this concept to me. After that, I NEVER brought to the table, something that wasn't prepared EXACTLY as I had wrote the kitchen ticket as. IF it needed correction, I made the kitchen correct it right then and there. This is one of the marks of a professional server! I blame the SERVER every time for food delivered incorrectly prepared. It demonstrates to me that you don't care and that you are just a food conveyer system. "

 

 

I agree with this except that the server(which is the order taker) can mess up and NOT the kitchen. I have had a waiter tell me he pressed the WRONG button. He actually brought the wrong food to me. I do agree he SHOULDN'T have ever brought it to me, which he did look like an idiot. I feel the server should REREAD the order they wrote down BEFORE they bring it to the customer. I agree 100% with that.

 

Originally Posted by Cogito Ergo Sum

"1. I never assume a tip is deserved, ever. It must be earned, each and every time. Tipping has been somehow perverted from a reward for EXCELLENT service, to a "you simply owe me 20%-25% or you're a cheap bastard" scenario. You seem to further this misconception regarding tipping."

 

 

I agree 100%. If servers would just remember my condiments, they would get a higher tip. To me, the server has to EARN their tip. If they forget anything, it will be deducted, especially even more so if I don't get an apology. I also don't like when servers bring me a refill I NEVER ordered. Sometimes I just don't want anymore drink and sometimes I actually want to switch soft drinks. I wish servers could let the CUSTOMER'S order for THEMSELVES. I also think that a good server wouldn't go buss a table before doing a request. One time a waiter at Applebees decided to buss a table with my credit card and receipt in his hand which was making us wait to leave. There is NO need to make a customer wait for clean up work. There is something else that also bugs me, when servers go to get your order, then go to 2 other tables to ask them how they are doing. I wish they would just go IN ORDER . If I am at table 6 and ask for refills, it isn't right to make my table to wait for refills while you go to 2 other tables. It's like "What's the POINT?" If the server isn't fiinshed with the other people, why did they bother asking my table if we wanted anything else. If I was a server, I'd write down each request and go in order as they come. Obviously, if the food was ready for a table, I'd have to bring the food since it was ordered before the next request. For instance, if I am serving tables: 5, 7, and 3. If I just got a request for some refills for table 7 and table's 5 order is ready. I would get table 5's food order 1st and then get table 7's refills because table 5 did order their food before table 7's refills. Now after I bring table 5's order, they ask for a side of ranch. I would go get table 7's refills BEFORE the ranch because the refills were request before the ranch. Basically what I am saying is that I would go in the order things come in a like a line.

 

I don't like when a server is triple sat and they get ALL 3 table's drink orders one after the other instead of going in order. I have had this happen at Outback. The waiter took my order which from the time we sat down to the time my husband and I got our 2 soft drinks, 10 minutes had already alapsed. We could have our drinks in 4 minutes to minutes, but instead the waiter doesn't want to take the extra steps to walk back and forth to make the individual tables wait longer. Also, he did something that irked me, he had the gall to give the second table's drinks before ours and we ordered our drinks before they did. That table had at least 4 people at it. I think that is SO unfair. If I would have been in that situation, I would have gotten the first table's drink order and went to get JUST those 2 drinks ONLY and then said "I'll be right back" and go to the second table to get their drink order. Then I would go to get their drinks. If they would have ordered a bar drink, I would still go put the drink order in and bring the soft drinks that were ordered it there were any. When I would bring the soft drinks to the second table I would say I'd be right back. Then I would go to the third table and get their drink order. I would tell them the moment I would get to their table that I would be right back. I would immediately go to the first table and get their food order and then go put it in. Same thing for the second table and then the third table.

 

I feel just treat others as you'd like to be treated.

I agree 100%. If servers would just remember my condiments, they would get a higher tip.

I personally always remember my condiments....always...its my job....Unless you are a total asshole..then i dont mind delaying it....perhaps you are this type and your server does it to you on purpose?

 

To me, the server has to EARN their tip. If they forget anything, it will be deducted, especially even more so if I don't get an apology.

How typical of the customer that thinks they are the only table in the entire restarurant! Now if a GOOD server gets delayed in getting something to the table they will know immediately before you even ask and run to the back to get it for you...and apologize as they are giving it to you!..No respectable server will not apologize..which makes me wonder...do you consider fast food as table service?

 

I also don't like when servers bring me a refill I NEVER ordered.

Sorry, but you are in the minority on this one! I refill my customers drinks without asking when they are about one third of the way through the meal...then i start asking. I dont know about you, but the slurping sound at the end of your glass then cranking your neck to find your server is far more annoying than a full glass in front of you!.. Now isnt it?!?!

 

Sometimes I just don't want anymore drink and sometimes I actually want to switch soft drinks.

then say so stupid....your server is there to do what you want....They are refilling your (FREE) beverage because that what your ordered!! If you want something different, then grow some balls and when they take your emptyish glass that you want something different.....that is what your server is for.....Keep in mind, like the majority of the human population, that servers failed (just like you) Mind Reading 101......

 

I wish servers could let the CUSTOMER'S order for THEMSELVES. I also think that a good server wouldn't go buss a table before doing a request. One time a waiter at Applebees decided to buss a table with my credit card and receipt in his hand which was making us wait to leave.

AWwwwww...thats too bad that your server thought a clean table to write your nonexistant tip would suffice...

 

There is NO need to make a customer wait for clean up work.

SO you are the one in a million customer that would like a totaly dirty table with tons of dirty dishes at the table? Sorry but your in the minority on that one...customers CONSANTLY complain that you arent taking dishes away from the table...

 

There is something else that also bugs me, when servers go to get your order, then go to 2 other tables to ask them how they are doing. I wish they would just go IN ORDER .

A good server will go in order...to the best of their ability. Think of it backwards.....you sit down...see a server taking orders and drink orders and running those pesky condiments you are willing to remove the tip if they forget....and you are the last one seated...yet your server is taking awhile to get to you. You get annoyed right? They are trying to communicate something to you....you knkow what that is???? THAT THEY GIVE A CRAP ABOUT YOU....ooops sorry to yell. But look at it from the backwards perspective...

 

Your server is trying to please everyone at the same time...even if they get an asshole like you at their table..they still want to please you...trust me they do!

 

If I am at table 6 and ask for refills, it isn't right to make my table to wait for refills while you go to 2 other tables. It's like "What's the POINT?" If the server isn't fiinshed with the other people, why did they bother asking my table if we wanted anything else.

It means you need to grow up....apparently you haven tyet

 

If I was a server, I'd write down each request and go in order as they come.

if you did, you wouldnt get any tips..and you wouldnt make it in the service industry....Im gonna dare you, before you exit puberty, to wait tables...for at least 1 month...then post again....

 

Obviously, if the food was ready for a table, I'd have to bring the food since it was ordered before the next request. For instance, if I am serving tables: 5, 7, and 3. If I just got a request for some refills for table 7 and table's 5 order is ready. I would get table 5's food order 1st and then get table 7's refills because table 5 did order their food before table 7's refills. Now after I bring table 5's order, they ask for a side of ranch. I would go get table 7's refills BEFORE the ranch because the refills were request before the ranch. Basically what I am saying is that I would go in the order things come in a like a line.

Not really..you would do it all at the same time...but who am i? Nothing but a SERVANT..not a server..right?

 

 

I could go on..but dont have the gusto...You seem to apparently watch servers at their job...but only when it concerns you.......try actually watching a server wait on all of their section to try and please EVERYONE at their tables...it isnt easy...and you get assholes (like yourself) that think they deserve everything before everyoneelse...no matter how it really works!

Vortex said Unless you are a total asshole..then i dont mind delaying it....perhaps you are this type and your server does it to you on purpose?

 

I am nice. I actually say thank you and ASK "Can I have a refill?" I don't just say Coke, I actually be nice about it. This can be an example of when I order: Cheeseburger with just lettuce and onions only with 2 sides of mayonnaise and 1 side of mustard. I went to Chilis on friday which I ordered a cheeseburger and the food runner brought out my food WITHOUT my condiments. I feel it is the SERVER'S responsibility to bring out my condiments before the meal if they have other people that are running their food. ONLY the server knows, NOT the food runner. I DEFINATELY wouldn't depend on the cook for my tip if I was the server, I would take charge of my destiny and make a good tip by bringing the condiments ahead of time. I acually had servers before bring my condiments before my meal because they said they didn't want to forget, now that is a CARING server to do something like that. I also feel he should have said at least a sorry, but there was none. The food runner had NO clue about my condiments. Also, my husbands meal got messed up too. They put vegetables instead of the cinnamon apples he ordered because this waiter DIDN'T write ANY of the order down. I was waiting to eat my food because I like to eat a lot of mayonnaise on my burger and I also don't like ketchup so I eat fries with mayonnaise. I think that it is wrong for you to delay ANYONE'S food. Customers should get EQUAL treatment. YOUR tip will suffer more, so WHY in the world would you want to make a bad tip. I personally would rather treat customers equal in hopes I get a better tip. Even if I made an extra buck, it's all worth treating them equally. That is what a server is SUPPOSE to do, not treat customers differently.

 

When I worked at the donut shop, they had video poker machines the first year I worked there. When people would win, I'd be the one that have to go in the back to give them the cash they won. MOST customers, when they'd win, they tip us like 5, 10, or even a 20 dollar bill. This one lady NEVER tipped AT ALL. I STILL treated her the EXACT same way as EVERYONE ELSE. I went in order also when she was being served. I NEVER treated other people better than her, I treated people the SAME. Yes, I KNEW she wasnt' going to tip me, but I have a heart and CAN'T be mean to people just because they didn't tip me. This lady was a regular, not everyday, but came in a lot. I had to count the money at least 2 times, once in the back and once to the customer. I did the RIGHT thing and treated her like gold, just like EVERYONE else. So, I think it looks like you are the one that is the mean person treating people differently. Like you said, it is YOUR JOB to remember the condiments, so if you don't do your job well, your tip may go down. WHY would you want that to happen? WOULDN'T you want to make that extra money, like instead of 18%, they'd give you 20%?

 

Vortex said How typical of the customer that thinks they are the only table in the entire restarurant!

 

I DON'T think that at ALL. Just like you said

personally always remember my condiments....always...its my job....

 

Well then if it is YOUR job, if you don't do it correctly, obviously if a customer doesn't take off for it, the next time you get these customers you may say to yourself "Gee, they don't take off if I mess up, so WHY bother trying?" WHY reward someone for messing up? I want to PREVENT the mistake from happening EVER again. Some people have said the server may not know why I reduced the tip, but I TRULY think they know if they forget something that it is a mistake. If the server forgets something, it SHOULD be taken off. The server, if there is no food runner running the food at the time, reread the order they wrote down BEFORE they bring the food out. I WOULDN'T put my trust into the cook. They aren't the one's getting tipped.

 

Vortex said then say so stupid....your server is there to do what you want......They are refilling your (FREE) beverage because that what your ordered![/quote

 

NO, the server should come and ASK the customer if they want more drink. WHY did you say this

They are refilling your (FREE) beverage because that what your ordered!

? Uhh, I DIDN'T order another drink. The server ASSUMES that I want another of the same drink instead of just asking FIRST. The server is making a decision for the customer, they have NO RIGHT to order for the customer. I SHOULDN'T have to tell them that they need to come ask me, they should let me order for MYSELF. I ordered 1 soft drink, NOT a refill. The server does this so they don't have to make another trip to come ask the customer which shows that they don't CARE about the customer, they only care about not making their feet more tired. If the server cared about what the CUSTOMER wants, there would be no automatic refilling of drinks without asking.

 

Vortex said Keep in mind, like the majority of the human population, that servers failed (just like you) Mind Reading 101......

 

NO, they are trying to read the CUSTOMER'S mind by getting them a drink that TRUTHFULLY and HONESTLY you don't know that they want. HOW can you know for SURE if you don't ASK? YOU DON'T, so you are mind reading. WHAT in the world is so hard about ASKING? Sounds like LAZINESS to me that you don't want to make another trip to please the customer.

 

Vortex said AWwwwww...thats too bad that your server thought a clean table to write your nonexistant tip would suffice...

 

For one thing, there were other mistakes that waiter made also like forgetting my extra bar-b-que sauce, which he didn't apologize for. Anyway, MOST people DON'T care about a clean table that is across from them when they want to leave, be for real. They want to get on with their day, not just sit there and wait for a waiter to clean up something that has NOTHING to do with their service, which this is something that could have been done RIGHT after he brought our rung up receipt. WHY delay a customer like that, WHY? Since he took the credit card and bill in his hand, WHY O' WHY did he take it if he wasn't ready for it considering he was bussing a table RIGHT across from us? If he wasn't ready to ring our bill up, WHY did he bother to pick up the credit card and bill then? THAT didn't make ANY sense. He should have just went to ring up the bill and THEN, bussed the table.

 

iVortex said if you did, you wouldnt get any tips

 

I would, because when I did go in order, I DID get tips when I worked at the diner/donut shop. I served food to booths, the counter, and 2 seater tables. I went in order, and I made tips. Also, I have seen servers go in order lots of times and I gave them a very good tip for treating me like they are suppose to.

 

and you get assholes (like yourself) that think they deserve everything before everyoneelse

 

NO, you see, you don't know me and YOU are the one that is calling people names. HOW old are you 2? I respect people enough not to be so mean, which obviously you are. NO, I don't think I deserve everything before eveyone else, I said the server should go in order. Meaning if I am at table 4 which got seated right after table 6. I would HOPE that the server would go to table 6 first since they got seated first. I would feel bad for table 6 if the server decided to go to us right after they ordered their drinks and instead of going get their drinks, the server would get our drink order. That's NOT right, the server should be going get their drinks FIRST, and then say "I'll be right back" and go and get our drink order as well as our drinks, unless it is a bar drink, then that will take more time, so that will be delayed.

 

Let's say if table 3 has 5 people and table 7 has 2 people. Table 7 ordered just soft drinks first, which they got seated first. I would go get table 7's drinks first. Let's say also that table 3 orders just soft drinks. Some servers would make table 7 wait for 7 drinks to be filled, that is making table 7 wait MUCH longer for ONLY 2 drinks. That is VERY UNFAIR to do that to table 7 got seated first. Table 7 SHOULDN'T have to wait for 7 soft drinks to be filled and brought to the tables, that is making the SERVER'S job easier, it ISN'T being fair at ALL to table 7. That shows that the server isn't thinking of EACH customer INDIVIDUALLY. They are looking at the situation as a group, which it SHOULD be like a line. If table 7 is first, table 7 should be served their soft drinks first.

 

I WOULD make tips because I WOULD put customers BEFORE side work. I would make the CUSTOMER the MOST imporant thing. Their time is MUCH more important than my side work. HONESTLY, I don't know anyone that wants to wait longer when they are hungry. If the server would go put the food order in RIGHT after it is ordered instead of going to 2 other tables, my food would be cooked that much SOONER. Server Joe Smoe beat server Jane Doe to the computer because server Jane Doe went to 2 tables before going to the computer. This means, table 5's(let's say John Doe is sitting there dining alone), order could have been in before the table that Joe Smoe's table 6, but because Jane Doe didn't go to the computer RIGHT after, table 5's order is delayed just that much more, especially, let's say both tables ordered the same dish, table 6 get's their pasta dish before table 5. It SHOULD be the other way around. Table 5's order SHOULD have been done BEFORE table 6.

Vortex, I also want to say one more thing. Just because the refill is free DOESN'T mean that it is wanted. YOU are just ASSUMING that the customer wants it.

Don't you realize they are getting you the refill to SAVE TIME so your service IS FASTER?? Sheesh. If you're not paying for it, what the hell do you care?? Get a grip!

Vortex, I also want to say one more thing. Just because the refill is free DOESN'T mean that it is wanted. YOU are just ASSUMING that the customer wants it.

 

 

Just because someone is an asshole doesnt mean i want to serve them either...

 

 

But ill give you a tip.....DONT DRINK IT.....there problem solved!!!

 

So your saying you would rather have an uncaring server that will not refill your beverage untill you ask....or untill they get busy and cant get to you quick enough as that spicy burrito is burning your mouth and you are slurping away at your empty drink chewing on ice cubes trying to get your servers attention?

 

Personally id rather have a full drink i wont be drinking in front of me than not getting any refills at all!

 

I only refill soda's for people without asking....Iced Tea and Coffee ill ask because people put sugar and stuff in them, Lemonades i ask because they are sweet and if they dont want any more ill offer water....(plus i have to go to the bar and get the bartender to refill them which takes time away from other tables....)

 

 

Wow..never heard of someone getting all riled up because someone was trying to give them good service.....Guess its true....servers cant win

 

PS ill be responding to your longer post later.....now i have to go to work and expedite...i have a kitchen to run so people dont complain that their well done 12 oz ribeye isnt done in 10 minutes.......