Something to entertain married guys.

[cool_dude]

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband wants a threesome with my bestfriend and me.

A: Obviously your husband cannot get enough of you! Knowing that

there is only one of you he can only settle for the next best thing -

your best friend. Far from being an issue, this can bring you closer

together. Why not get some of your old collage roommates involved

too? If you are still apprehensive, maybe you should let him be with

your friends without you. If you're still not sure then just perform

oral on him.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband continually asks me to perform oral *** on him.

A: Do it. Sperm can help you loose weight and gives a great glow

to your skin. Interestingly, men know this. His offer to allow you to

perform oral *** on him is totally selfless. This shows he loves you.

The best thing to do is to thank him by performing it twice a day.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband has too many nights out with the boys.

A: This is perfectly natural behavior and it should be encouraged.

The man is a hunter and he needs to prove his prowess with

other men. A night out chasing young single girls is a great stress

relief and can foster a more peaceful and relaxing home. Remember,

nothing can rekindle your relationship better than the man being

away for a day or two (it's a great time to clean the house too!).

Just look at how emotional and happy he is when he returns to his

stable home. The best thing to do when he gets home is for you

and your best friend to perform oral on him.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband doesn't know where my ******** is.

A: Your ******** is of no concern to your husband. If you must

mess with it, do it in your own time or ask your best friend to

help. You may wish to videotape yourself while doing this, and

present it to your husband as a birthday gift. To ease your

selfish guilt, perform oral on him and cook him a delicious meal.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband always has an ****** then rolls over and goes to

sleep never giving me one.

A: I'm not sure I understand the problem.

Dear Mr. Abby:

Q: My husband is uninterested in foreplay.

A: You are a bad person for bringing it up and should seek sensitivity

training. Foreplay to a man is very stressful and time consuming. ***

should be available to your husband on demand with no pesky requests

for foreplay. What this means is that you do not love your man as

much as you should - he should never have to work to get you in the

mood. Stop being so selfish! Perhaps you can make it up to him by

performing oral on him.

 

[Komrade Vostok Hazard]

HIT POINT!!

Mr Abbey definately has his head on track. AND ALL WOMEN SHOULD LISTEN TO THIS ADVICE.

 

[builder]

You boys are doomed to be bachelors. I have no pity for either of you.

 

[angie]

You boys are doomed to be bachelors. I have no pity for either of you.

The voice of reason finally speaks.

Believe it or not, I know plenty of men who think of things other than blow jobs.

Because they GREW UP. I will never understand KVH's animosity towards women, although I am sure it's safe to say he has mommy issues.

 

[eisanbt]

Not to sound like a suck-up but i'm definatly more entertained with pleasing the ladies then being pleased. I don';t find the above particulary amusing, its not even funny jackassery. We make a **** load of politically-inncorrect jokes in this household, none of which are serious but **** like that...meh.

Oh and Angie incase you didn't notice, the MEN were speaking.

 

[Komrade Vostok Hazard]

The animosity will stop when they pay to get into the bar, they get in **** for making ***** of themselves, when men can hit back, when feminazis realize the difference between equal rights and special rights, when there will be no more "hot chicks" being treated like pillars of society and getting paid and glorified to be pretty, when they start liking guys for more than just financial and material gain, when they stop being ***** teases, when they don't compare average guys that are at their level to hollywood stars that they will never have a chance with, when they don't ***** about trivial **** like the ******* toilet seat being up, when they realize AND RESPECT the fact that men like to ogle girls and men like to ****, When they lose the princess complexes they tend to have and realize their worthlessness, when all these ***** whipped men stop worshipping women, When they ALL lose any form of pissy attitudes they have (this bullshit is just TRASHY), when they lighten the **** up, when they know how to control themselves if they recieve anything that even remotely resembles status, when they realize that men have lives beyond them, when women stop trying to be sexy, when women stop trying to be MACHO, and last but not least.....WHEN THEY ALL DIE.

 

[Komrade Vostok Hazard]

You boys are doomed to be bachelors. I have no pity for either of you.

I'm fine with that. I don't want to waste my life being stuck growing old with some broad who is guaranteed become a miserable old hag

 

[angie]

The animosity will stop when they pay to get into the bar, they get in **** for making ***** of themselves, when men can hit back, when feminazis realize the difference between equal rights and special rights, when there will be no more "hot chicks" being treated like pillars of society and getting paid and glorified to be pretty, when they start liking guys for more than just financial and material gain, when they stop being ***** teases, when they don't compare average guys that are at their level to hollywood stars that they will never have a chance with, when they don't ***** about trivial **** like the ******* toilet seat being up, when they realize AND RESPECT the fact that men like to ogle girls and men like to ****, When they lose the princess complexes they tend to have and realize their worthlessness, when all these ***** whipped men stop worshipping women, When they ALL lose any form of pissy attitudes they have (this bullshit is just TRASHY), when they lighten the **** up, when they know how to control themselves if they recieve anything that even remotely resembles status, when they realize that men have lives beyond them, when women stop trying to be sexy, when women stop trying to be MACHO, and last but not least.....WHEN THEY ALL DIE.

You are definitely hanging out with the wrong broads.

 

[builder]

This should be fun.

The animosity will stop when they pay to get into the bar,

Many niteclubs encourage women to enter for free for financial profit for the club. Take that up with management, who, more often than not, are MEN.

they get in **** for making ***** of themselves,

Fill us in on how they don't get in **** for that. Courts are rarely gender specific in handing down sentences.

when men can hit back,

Sounds like you've copped a few floggings for being a woman-hater. Karma is a pain in the ****, particularly for sexist fuckwits.

when feminazis realize the difference between equal rights and special rights,

OK, I think I know what you're on about here. Trouble is, only a small percentage of women fit that descriptor of yours.

when there will be no more "hot chicks" being treated like pillars of society and getting paid and glorified to be pretty,

Name one. And if it's Paris Hilton, who ever assumed she was a pillar of society? A rich ***** heiress airhead is how she markets herself. You want her, but you can't have her, so you bag the **** out of her. Poor fella.

when they start liking guys for more than just financial and material gain,

Gold-diggers are everywhere. Gender has little to do with that greed thing that has taken over from honesty and integrity. Look to government for proof.

when they stop being ***** teases,

Sweeping generalisation. You meant to say, "why won't they just suck my **** and get on with it?"

when they don't compare average guys that are at their level to hollywood stars that they will never have a chance with,

Like Angie said, you're chasing the wrong broads.

when they don't ***** about trivial **** like the ******* toilet seat being up,

LOL, I have to agree with you there. But then again, a brother-in-law of mine is even more fixated about such things. Most women eventually accept that blokes can't **** into a bucket without getting it everywhere.

when they realize AND RESPECT the fact that men like to ogle girls and men like to ****,

Men do like to ogle women, but getting to the *** thing takes time, patience, and charm. Wise up, you impatient little woman-hater.

When they lose the princess complexes they tend to have and realize their worthlessness,

Ad hominen attack. Total bullshit. Princess complexes are usually inspired by the father figure. Most women are over that even by your age, Komrad.

when all these ***** whipped men stop worshipping women,

I never worship women. I've never been *****-whipped. Teens are often acused of this condition. Men are over it, usually by your age.

When they ALL lose any form of pissy attitudes they have (this bullshit is just TRASHY),

Generalisation. Women soon realise that acting bratty only works with brats.

when they lighten the **** up,

And you are a prime example of someone who has "lightened the **** up"???

when they know how to control themselves if they recieve anything that even remotely resembles status,

Power corrupts. Ultimate power destroys. Are you learning anything here?

If you keep putting girls on pedestals, they will soon become tired of being up there. Be a friend first, think about the *** bit later.

when they realize that men have lives beyond them,

Quit chasing ditzy teens then. If people need entertaining full-time, they are not complete people. I have mates like that. I can only put up with that **** for a very short time myself.

when women stop trying to be sexy,

Make up your ******* mind, Komrad. You want women in baggy pants and daggy sweaters?

when women stop trying to be MACHO,

Oh, like now we are getting to the point. You are one of the most feminine looking blokes I've seen, Komrad. You want to be the only glamour queen to be seen?

and last but not least.....WHEN THEY ALL DIE.

See above.

 

[angie]

**** Builder. You beat me to it. Bravo.

 

[builder]

**** Builder. You beat me to it. Bravo.

I don't think I did it true justice. The feminine point of view would be much appreciated, Angie.

 

[Komrade Vostok Hazard]

This should be fun.


Many niteclubs encourage women to enter for free for financial profit for the club. Take that up with management, who, more often than not, are MEN.

How this works to gain finances I don't know. And probably never will. And these dudes must be *****-worshippers.

Fill us in on how they don't get in **** for that. Courts are rarely gender specific in handing down sentences.

I see women making ***** and total attention whores of themselves EVERYWHERE. When men do this they get Rodney king'd

Sounds like you've copped a few floggings for being a woman-hater. Karma is a pain in the ****, particularly for sexist fuckwits.

I haven't recieved any floggings. I just think that MEN SHOULD HAVE A ******* RIGHT TO DEFEND THEMSELVES IF NEED BE.

OK, I think I know what you're on about here. Trouble is, only a small percentage of women fit that descriptor of yours.

I have yet to see a feminazi who DOESN'T fit my descriptor here

Name one. And if it's Paris Hilton, who ever assumed she was a pillar of society? A rich ***** heiress airhead is how she markets herself. You want her, but you can't have her, so you bag the **** out of her. Poor fella.

How about EVERY single ***** who made a fortune from modelling, *******, lip syncing, etc. They aren't doing anything useful for the world but yet someone gave them a gazillion dollars to do it, so obviously some ******* thinks they're something special. This burns my ***.

Gold-diggers are everywhere. Gender has little to do with that greed thing that has taken over from honesty and integrity. Look to government for proof.

I never seen a man who plays women for money and free ****.

Sweeping generalisation. You meant to say, "why won't they just suck my **** and get on with it?"

yes

Like Angie said, you're chasing the wrong broads.

Seems that EVERY broad is the wrong broad if that's the case.

LOL, I have to agree with you there. But then again, a brother-in-law of mine is even more fixated about such things. Most women eventually accept that blokes can't **** into a bucket without getting it everywhere.

You're on to something. I'LL LEAVE THE SEAT DOWN AND **** ALL OVER IT. That will shut them up for sure.

Men do like to ogle women, but getting to the *** thing takes time, patience, and charm. Wise up, you impatient little woman-hater.

Why oh ******* why do women expect men to play ******* Mr Smooth games? They know men want *****. So they either need to give it up or get lost.

Ad hominen attack. Total bullshit. Princess complexes are usually inspired by the father figure. Most women are over that even by your age, Komrad.

When they get to my age they still think they can't do any wrong and then find a man to spoil them instead of daddy.

I never worship women. I've never been *****-whipped. Teens are often acused of this condition. Men are over it, usually by your age.

Teens? I've seen this condition more rampant with married men who live in fear of their wives. Guess I can't blame them since the courts will always step in to help the women take their husbands to the cleaners bad enough to put him on the streets. (I personally know someone who had this happen to him) And maybe you don't worship women....NOT ALL MEN HAVE THE SENSE NOT TO DO THIS. But I guess this is mostly the men's fault.

Generalisation. Women soon realise that acting bratty only works with brats.

I wish reality would kick them all in the *** that easily.

And you are a prime example of someone who has "lightened the **** up"???

I wish I could....but there is too much bullshit going on in this world that burns my *** to no end

Power corrupts. Ultimate power destroys. Are you learning anything here? If you keep putting girls on pedestals, they will soon become tired of being up there. Be a friend first, think about the *** bit later.

I assume you're saying you can beat them at their own game with the part about putting them on high. I don't know about this. They do let it get to their heads quite severely.

Oh and most of my friends were members of the less-hairy ***. Key word WERE. I'm ashamed to have ever given them a such a title as "friend". All they did was give me random small talk, and you could just look at their body language and realize they were thinking everything from "I could care less whether I see this loser or not. I'm just being socialable because that's the acceptable thing to do" all the way to "please let this ******* go away. I don't have the heart to tell him to **** off to his face"

Quit chasing ditzy teens then. If people need entertaining full-time, they are not complete people. I have mates like that. I can only put up with that **** for a very short time myself.

Not complete people? Guess that pretty much sums up womankind there.

Make up your ******* mind, Komrad. You want women in baggy pants and daggy sweaters?

Heaven forbid I don't like a woman who looks like a two cent ***** (because they're clearly using *** appeal to gain free **** or to flirt their way in and out of everything)

Oh, like now we are getting to the point. You are one of the most feminine looking blokes I've seen, Komrad. You want to be the only glamour queen to be seen?

So I suppose you LIKE it when WOMEN are macho? Well if you get off on some dike with a cigarette hanging out of her hairy mouth, a beer belly down to her knees or a physique that makes her look like King ******* Kong, while cursing and trash talking like a sailor....that's fine with me. But I personally find that idea rather repulsive.

It's interesting how you referred to me as a "queen". Just to let you know, there's not a gay bone in my body. It's not that I find women unattractive, I just find women (and especially political correctness) to be a pain in the ***.

See above.

 

[tiredofwhiners]

KVH maybe you just need to get laid. There's no way a real woman would ever **** you, so get out and find some homeless crank ***** and trade her for some ***.

Or save the crank and swallow a bullet, and save the people around you. Because i'm sure in person your as big of social dumb *** as you are here.

Is there anything in life you are happy about?

 

[Komrade Vostok Hazard]

KVH maybe you just need to get laid. There's no way a real woman would ever **** you, so get out and find some homeless crank ***** and trade her for some ***

And since most real women are annoying pompous ******* as mentioned earlier, there's no way I'd want to **** them either.

Or save the crank and swallow a bullet, and save the people around you. Because i'm sure in person your as big of social dumb *** as you are here

Swallow a bullet? I consider that every day actually, but let's not get into that. And as far as being a social dumbass is concerned, what do you suggest I do? Kiss the *** of anything with a set of ****?

Is there anything in life you are happy about?

No