It is very quiet round here isn't it
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Well here I go, heres all you need to know about my trip to Holland
Well I survived the boat ride there... it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. We then drove to the campsite (which was a stupid happy camp called Eurocamp). We were staying in a caravan, much to my dissaproval, cuz I'm too spoilt to live in a caravan for a week
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Well after we got there my brother and his friends wanted to visit the camp's theme park.. so we did, and then we went to a water park. Pretty boring day.
The next day was also boring
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Apart from we went into the village and looked at the shops and bought cake
We went to Amsterdam on Wednesday, which was pretty good, apart from it was really confusing and we couldn't find any of the main shops. It was good though, there are so many drug shops! Coming from a country where marijuana, cannabis and magic mushrooms are illegal it was an amusing experience for me. Its a shame my mum wouldn't buy a cannabis starter kit
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, she feared that she would get done at customs for attempting to smuggle illegal drugs into the country
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. We also went to Anne Franks house which was really interesting.
The next day we went to Amsterdam again with some friends of ours. Luckily we got to do a bit more as we found the shops that day. We went around some shops but didn't buy anything. Then we went to the flower market, where they also sold drugs. My mums friend bought a cannabis starter kit because she 'liked the plant'. I ripped off a cannabis leaf to take home as a souvenir but I lost it on the way home
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. Me and my friend got bored of looking at flowers so we went in this weird souvenir shop. The owner of the shop gave us a funny look, but I dismissed it to the fact that he wa probably racist and hated Engligh people
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. My fried tried on this Britney style wig and started dancing with it on and singing while I was ******* myself laughing. But then, uh oh, the shopkeepr came up to us in the middle of his routine and went "Are you English?", so we said "yes", and then he pointed to this tiny weeny sign above the wigs saying DO NOT TOUCH. "What does that say?".. "er.. do not touch?". We didn't even notice it, it was too small lol. Then he started ranting on going "I have to clean all this up (yeah, all that, we didn't even make a mess you loser), I don't come to your house and mess up all your things (dude, get over it)", then he asked us to leave
Well after that we went to Amsterdam's famous Red Light District (joy..). It wasn't that bad, there wern't many prostitutes there (probably all in service lol), but most of the ones that were there were ugly
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. There was also an endless amount of *** shops and cinemas. We also got halfway through this street before realising it was the gay street. When we were near the end of out visit to Amsterdam we realised this guy was following us. Thinking he was just going the same way as us we just ignored it, but he kept following us, and by this point we were getting really worried. We stopped at a shop and then he went the other way, stopping at each puddle to put his finger in it and wave it around a bit (weird I know). So we headed back to the station, but as we were about to go in the station he walked in front of us. We were scared, we thought he was a terrorist or something lol. We eventually lost him in the crowd.
The next day we went to this other town, to look at a cheese market! We just at alot of cheese and didn't do much else. We went to the water park again and played bingo
On Saturday we went to another town. We got the bus there and after we stopped at the station we went to make a toilet break. We were all ****** off cuz you have to pay 50 ******' cents to use a public toilet
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so me, my mum and my mums friend all decided to sneak into the toilets on one 50c coin (since it is stupid that they charge people for using the toilet.. when you gotta go, you gotta go
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). Just as we were all about to squash through the turnstile this Dutch old woman popped up from behind this counter and started screaming at us in Dutch! We didn't know wtf she was saying, but we knew it was about not paying up. She was really screaming her *** of, looked like she was gonna have a heart attack. Eventually she switched to English and started screaming "One person, one person!!" repeatedly. My mum and her friend paid up but I couldn't be bothered going so I just stood outside watching her storm around her little office area, muttering to herself in Dutch. She kept giving me the evil eye, probably checking that I wasn't gonna try and sneak in
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. Well she was the highlight of my day, not much else happened.
The next day we just stayed in the park, went to the theme parks and water parks and didn't do much else. The next day we went back home on the boat and had a gruelling 6 hour car journey back up the country.
I thought that you all might like to know that I found not one, but TWO shops named the same as our beloved drummer boy! The first, was in a little village and it was called 'Robbies Friet' aka Robbies chip shop! I insisted upon eating there that night. The next however, was a very different sort of shop, it was called 'Rob's Erotic Clothing' and was located in the gay section of the Red Light District! This immediatly sparked thoughts of Rob in spandex
Overall views:
- They're obsessed with bikes! They're lethal! I lost count of how many times someone almost ran me over with one.
- Its stupid to charge people for using the toilet.
- Legalise marijuana!
- If I ever see another happy ******* frog I'm going to kill someone. (Eurocamp's mascot is a happy green frog and they insisted on plastering his face on everything. His name was Rick The Frog.)
Well thats my amazing holiday tale
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Its good to be back though, I missed this place *sniff* *Hugs everyone*