phreakwars Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here. AL GORE: I invented the chicken. I invented the road. therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people. COLIN POWELL: Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road. HANS BLIX: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access to the other side of the road. MOHAMMED ALDOURI: (Iraq ambassador) The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete fabrication. We don't even have a chicken. SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it. RALPH NADER: The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV. PAT BUCHANAN: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American. RUSH LIMBAUGH: I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross. MARTHA STEWART: No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side. That's what they call it -- the other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." DR. SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, The chicken crossed the road, But why it crossed, I've not been told! ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain. Alone. MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question. GRANDPA: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us. BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road. JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace. ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. KARL MARX: It was an historical inevitability. VOLTAIRE: I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it. RONALD REAGAN: What chicken? CAPTAIN KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before. FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it? SIGMUND FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity. BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook - and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken. ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken? BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please? COLONEL SANDERS: I missed one? . . 1 Quote https://www.facebook.com/phreakwars Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jokersarewild Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 Nice, dude. I especially love the Bill Gates one. I hate him. Anyway, I know that there have been stories that Gore said he invented things. Not True! He said he "championed" the Arpenet(sp?), also known as the internet. Did he say he invented it? No. Did he say he wrote the packets? No. I would have voted for Al Gore, but I am 15. Quote RoyalOrleans is my real dad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hugh G. Rekshun Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 You forgot Fifty Cent (Fidy Cent) : What da fuck is a chicken? Quote "May you sit naked in Hell for all eternity with your tender rectum resting squarely upon the sharp end of a red hot barbed stalagmite, all the while you are tormented forever by hideous demons who force you to listen to endless Barry Manilow and Elton John duets of Ashlee Simpson's greatest hits, let this fate befall all those who so much as plagiarize one single word from my work" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phreakwars Posted April 7, 2005 Author Share Posted April 7, 2005 Wouldn't Fidy cent say something like: "Mo fucka was runnin like a bitch till I popped a cap in his ass and fry'd em up in da Crisco Quote https://www.facebook.com/phreakwars Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hugh G. Rekshun Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 Lol! Quote "May you sit naked in Hell for all eternity with your tender rectum resting squarely upon the sharp end of a red hot barbed stalagmite, all the while you are tormented forever by hideous demons who force you to listen to endless Barry Manilow and Elton John duets of Ashlee Simpson's greatest hits, let this fate befall all those who so much as plagiarize one single word from my work" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captainfrenchfry Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 that sounds alot more reasonlable cause i'm pretty sure fidy cent would know what the fuck a chicken was. Quote Bow Down To Your Lord And Master Foamy!!!!! http://www.sucksbbs.net/data/MetaMirrorCache/b06170ad5254f3e23341c5baf387a116.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jokersarewild Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 Or President Bush:That there chicken crossed the road to use WMDs. He may deny it, and the UN might search him, but we know according to US intelligence that the chicken posseses Weapons of Mass Destruction. Quote RoyalOrleans is my real dad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anarchyintheuk Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 You forgot Fifty Cent (Fidy Cent) : What da fuck is a chicken? Nah it would be more like this: "For my ass da eat'em" AITUK Quote Right-O Cheerio !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jokersarewild Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 'da' isn't 'to', you dumbass. 'Da' is the. Seriously, I am tired of you talking about shit you don't know about or faking researching something when you don't. It is really annoying. Quote RoyalOrleans is my real dad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snafu Posted April 7, 2005 Share Posted April 7, 2005 John Kerry: I saw the chicken cross the road while I was in Cambodia during Christmas. Yes I saw our own men kill, torture, rape their chicks, Burn thier chicken coups and yes even eat those chickens before they had a chance to cross the road! Quote "You can't stop insane people from doing insane things by passing insane laws. That's just insane!" Penn & Teller NEVER FORGOTTEN Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anarchyintheuk Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 'da' isn't 'to', you dumbass. 'Da' is the. Seriously, I am tired of you talking about shit you don't know about or faking researching something when you don't. It is really annoying. Wow I'm sorry I'll research "Black slang" on the internet, like I'm sure you do every day. Stop misusing words like "ignorant" and "hypocrite" will you. Because you ARE the single most ignorant hypocrite on this site. Stop fuming off your own stupity on me for once and go to theropy dick head. AITUK Quote Right-O Cheerio !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phreakwars Posted April 8, 2005 Author Share Posted April 8, 2005 My Mom: The chicken crossed the road because it was trying to put its mom on a guilt trip again for being abused by its father years ago and still holds her responsible. I think my mom needs to tell that bitch she talks to in the coffee shop to get therapy. Mom's got issues herself, gotta quit being a busy body. . . Quote https://www.facebook.com/phreakwars Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ParasiteGod Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 ParasiteGod: The chicken crossed the road to piss off the farmer, who told it not to cross in the first place, in order to look "hardcore", "punk", and "cool" and impress it's friends. Chicken: Oh my god like, I crossed the road because I'm my own person, fuck authority. You don't know anything about me, shut up. Quote I want to report a double murder. If you go one mile east on Columbus Parkway to the public park, you will find kids in a brown car. They were shot with a 9mm Luger. I also killed those kids last year. Good bye Brooks, I like you. Now get out of here. Go home. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jokersarewild Posted April 8, 2005 Share Posted April 8, 2005 Hey, AITUK, www.gizzoogle.com You could at least translate the text before you go and sound like an idiot. Quote RoyalOrleans is my real dad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilspillicu2yahoo.com Posted April 11, 2005 Share Posted April 11, 2005 Maybe, becuz the chicken got tired of being on that side Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilmisssecrets Posted April 11, 2005 Share Posted April 11, 2005 michael jakko: What do you think that lil chicken will do for some corn?will he play with the "rooster"? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilmisssecrets Posted April 11, 2005 Share Posted April 11, 2005 i guess this topic is over with.lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snafu Posted April 11, 2005 Share Posted April 11, 2005 Palestinian: I shot the chicken before it could cross the road. He Was a Jew! Israeli: I shot the chicken before it could cross the road. He was a Muslim! Quote "You can't stop insane people from doing insane things by passing insane laws. That's just insane!" Penn & Teller NEVER FORGOTTEN Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
captainfrenchfry Posted April 12, 2005 Share Posted April 12, 2005 Chicken: to be honest i did it because it's sterotypical of us chickens Farmer: So that's where my chickens have been going Quote Bow Down To Your Lord And Master Foamy!!!!! http://www.sucksbbs.net/data/MetaMirrorCache/b06170ad5254f3e23341c5baf387a116.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
phreakwars Posted April 12, 2005 Author Share Posted April 12, 2005 Ron Jeremy: SHE WANTED TO SEE MY BIG COCK. . . Quote https://www.facebook.com/phreakwars Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lilmisssecrets Posted April 12, 2005 Share Posted April 12, 2005 chicken little: i knew there were pennies falling from the sky but no one believed me. so i went across the roads where other chickens had the same experince.i9 knew i wasnt crazy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anarchyintheuk Posted April 12, 2005 Share Posted April 12, 2005 Jesus: The chicken crossed to road to please his father, that is all that he ever wanted. And regardless of the fact that he was hit by a truck, a car, a semi, puked on, shat on, and made into a McChicken Burger in the process only made him more enlightened. Quote Right-O Cheerio !!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jokersarewild Posted April 12, 2005 Share Posted April 12, 2005 Darth Vader: He crossed the road to join the Dark Side. My son Luke should be crossing over any minute now...any minute... Quote RoyalOrleans is my real dad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jokersarewild Posted April 12, 2005 Share Posted April 12, 2005 Steven Jobs: He mistook my new Apple computer for a real apple. I put a homing device on the chicken and sent him back across. This way I can monitor what chickens want and put it in my new computer: The iChickentosh '06. Now comes w/ CD burner and complimentary cup holder. Quote RoyalOrleans is my real dad! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bart1123 Posted April 12, 2005 Share Posted April 12, 2005 Bill Gates: Convince the chickens to cross promising an easier crossing. Then when all the chickens cross the road upgrade the road...forcing all of the chickens to cross back. Quote "You are the only person responsible for your happiness...this life can be as wonderful or misserable as You choose." J.P.W Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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