Plastic surgery

[Ahhlee]

"Next winter, I will be sitting on a beach in Cancun in a bikini drinking mango margharitas." - Ali

 

This is my goal, and it will be realized.

 

I've done my research on weight loss and scared myself silly with the plastic surgery that many people require after the fact. Viewing pictures of huge amounts of sagging skin prompted me to plan for my own surgery once I met my goal weight. I was certain I would need to be competely reconstructed like some sort of Frankenstien's monster, so I set aside some money for the occasion.

 

Fortunately for me, my elasticity is holding up fairly well...probably due to my age, and the fact that I don't smoke and have been working out during the weight loss process....so my surgery probably won't be too extreme, but I still want to undergo some nips and tucks to make me happy.

 

One acquaintance and I were discussing life after weight loss and I mentioned I would be getting surgery sometime early next year. She replied, "Do you really think you'll need it? And isn't plastic surgery kind of shallow?"

 

My answer, "I think I WANT it and if it will help me come full circle with this whole transformation then call me 'shallow'."

 

.........

 

What are your thoughts on plastic surgery?

 

Would you ever have it done? How would you feel if your loved one wanted it?

[RoyalOrleans]

What are your thoughts on plastic surgery?

 

Would you ever have it done? How would you feel if your loved one wanted it?

 

We all know how timesjoke feels about elective surgery, but it is fine and dandy for his wife to get a boob job.

 

 

 

I want to get Lasik to correct my vision... I can't see sh!t without my glasses or contact lenses. It would be of great benefit, because I am way too vain to be seen in public with glasses.

 

My sister had the procedure done a few months ago and now she has perfect 20/20 vision. Not all circumstances are the same nor does the end result come out the same, but I believe that my results would be very close to my sister's situation.

[mercury]

Personally opposed... I'd rather learn to cope with my shortcomings and learn to accept me for me. The things that bother me most about my physical make up are not things that can be fixed through surgery, anyway. When they learn to make ugly hands pretty, I'll sign up

 

Publically- don't give a rat's ass. Whatever makes you happy and able to come to that acceptance is perfectly acceptable.... for you.

 

A lot of my personal resistance probably comes from the fact that everyone and their brother seems to think I should have issues with being so flat chested, and have not bothered to keep that kind of thing to themselves. It's kind of a big "F UKK YOU!!" to anyone who has ever voiced an opinion on how I should not accept my sternum and I should yearn for cleavage, instead.

 

BUT.... when I look in the mirror these days, I'm thinking that a little bit of botox between my eyebrows and maybe an eyelift might be in my future... possibly even the near future. And hair removal would be awesome if I had the funds for it!!

[Ahhlee]

We all know how timesjoke feels about elective surgery, but it is fine and dandy for his wife to get a boob job.

 

Yes, elective surgery is ELECTIVE surgery....no matter how you dice it.

 

Get it? "Dice"?

 

Oh, I'm such a cut up!

 

Get it? Cut.....oh, ok. I'll shut up.

 

 

I want to get Lasik to correct my vision... I can't see sh!t without my glasses or contact lenses. It would be of great benefit, because I am way too vain to be seen in public with glasses.

 

My sister had the procedure done a few months ago and now she has perfect 20/20 vision. Not all circumstances are the same nor does the end result come out the same, but I believe that my results would be very close to my sister's situation.

 

I have a friend who has been researching Lasik and I believe she's going to go to Canada to have it done because it's cheaper there but it's the same exact procedure.

 

Yes, if it worked well for your sister I would think you'd have a very similar outcome.

 

Me? I like my glasses cuz I dig looking like a nerd.

[Ahhlee]

Personally opposed... I'd rather learn to cope with my shortcomings and learn to accept me for me. The things that bother me most about my physical make up are not things that can be fixed through surgery, anyway. When they learn to make ugly hands pretty, I'll sign up

 

Publically- don't give a rat's ass. Whatever makes you happy and able to come to that acceptance is perfectly acceptable.... for you.

 

A lot of my personal resistance probably comes from the fact that everyone and their brother seems to think I should have issues with being so flat chested, and have not bothered to keep that kind of thing to themselves. It's kind of a big "F UKK YOU!!" to anyone who has ever voiced an opinion on how I should not accept my sternum and I should yearn for cleavage, instead.

 

BUT.... when I look in the mirror these days, I'm thinking that a little bit of botox between my eyebrows and maybe an eyelift might be in my future... possibly even the near future. And hair removal would be awesome if I had the funds for it!!

 

Honestly, if I had a husband and kids I wouldn't think of having extensive plastic surgery because I'd feel like I was being selfish by taking money away from them.

 

But since it's just me, I can do whatever the hell I want....lol.

 

I saw a show once about a woman who demanded that her husband buy her plastic surgery, so he took out a second mortgage on their dream home and ended up losing it. I think that's pretty sh!tty.

 

Besides Merc....Chris loves you for you and that's very special. Plus you're freakin' GORGEOUS! What's not to love?

[emkay64]

Depends on the surgery.

 

Personally I was considering a boob job, but exceedingly, they look fake, and I think it's a really poor example to set for two growing girls. My motivation is to restore some volume lol...I've had my babies and might enjoy a tune-up, but the stigma attached to fake breasts is difficult to grasp for two growing girls...so I'll pass.

 

A physical deformity....absolutely! If it helps you blend without extreme prejudice and restores your confidence...go get it. Skin removed after extreme weight loss, breast reductions, all things that are required to prevent pain go to it. It has to be pretty bad though. I personally love flaws. A bump on the nose, scars, big ears lol. They add character and I love that.

 

Botox? NO! I love lines...smile lines etc...all map a life...again...just age gracefully, please do not inject botulism in your face. Expressionless is really not the way to go. Not to say no moisturizer etc...but not that sh!t.

 

Ehhh I just don't like it in general. Like I previously mentioned...I have two growing girls...if their mother was injecting botox to erase the lines they gave me, or adding fake breasts because clearly small is unacceptable or what have you, how can I parent them on moral values when I'm a walking hypocrite...no...no surgery for me.

 

If one of my loved ones wanted it...I would stress completely that i don't feel they need to change. I love them without any of that. If they still wanted it, I'd be sick with worry that something would go terribly wrong. Finally if all went okay, I'd support their decisions, but I wouldn't like it lol. If my girls wanted it...they'd have to wait until they were out of my house. They are perfect as they are and need absolutely nothing. I couldn't support that very easily. The following article is basically why I am opting out of procedures. Body image issues are so prevalent in young girls...it's scary to me. I want them to develop a healthy self esteem and not have to focus on societies ridiculous version of the "norm".

 

http://www.ourbodiesourselves.org/book/companion.asp?id=1&compID=102

[Ahhlee]

If one of my loved ones wanted it...I would stress completely that i don't feel they need to change. I love them without any of that. If they still wanted it, I'd be sick with worry that something would go terribly wrong. Finally if all went okay, I'd support their decisions, but I wouldn't like it lol.

 

I'd be exactly the same way. I'd tell them they don't need it because obviously I love them no matter what, but if it's something they truly want to feel better about themselves I would make sure they researched it extensively and got the best care possible. And of course I would be by their side through every excruciating moment...lol.

 

I thought I wanted a breast reduction, but I think I would look strange without my boobs. Like you mentioned, I'm just looking for a bit of a perk (gravity is a bitch) and to possibly to restore volume, but my doctor will determine whether that is necessary or not.

 

Besides, I need my huge knockers to balance out my big ol' child bearing hips...haha!

 

Dang, if I had opted to have children, I would have given my husband fine, strong sons! Fine, strong sons indeed!

[timesjoke]

 

We all know how timesjoke feels about elective surgery, but it is fine and dandy for his wife to get a boob job.

 

Where did I ever say I was against elective surgery? You guys seem to have a great time making sh!t up just so you can talk trash.

 

 

 

Think of it like this, there are two mindsets to suicide, one is in the realm of mental illness, one is not. Knowing the difference will help you understand my possition on things like elective surgery.

 

 

In the situation you describe Ali, having elective surgery to help you find a healthy self image is perfectly reasonable, even my earlier "Devils advocate" possition with you on the belt deal was more to figure out the two sides of the destination, not a specific condemnation of any one procedure.

 

 

If you have a large amount of flabby flesh as a result of extreme weight loss then it is perfectly reasonable to want that removed and tightened up. If you can afford it, why not? If your money cannot be spent to make you feel better, then what is the point? I have a river house not because I need it but because in my life it is nice to

 

 

 

emkay,

 

I agree in part with your point but at the same time everything from tooth whiteners to makeup is used by women for one purpose, to improve their looks, to offer a better self image, to give confidence and happiness for the woman to face her world........is it really that much of a difference to get cosmetic surgery?

 

How long have padded bras and even padded pants been available on the market for women emkay? Let's look at the corset for example, first popular in the 1600's they were designed to draw in the waist and push up the breasts. Women have been using artificial means to alter their appearance for generations emkay, personally I feel as long as the person is not doing it for the wrong reasons, an elective surgery is in the same boat as all the other methods women use to improve their appearance using artificial means.

 

.

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[Ahhlee]

emkay,

 

I agree in part with your point but at the same time everything from tooth whiteners to makeup is used by women for one purpose, to improve their looks, to offer a better self image, to give confidence and happiness for the woman to face her world........is it really that much of a difference to get cosmetic surgery?

 

How long have padded bras and even padded pants been available on the market for women emkay? Let's look at the corset for example, first popular in the 1600's they were designed to draw in the waist and push up the breasts. Women have been using artificial means to alter their appearance for generations emkay, personally I feel as long as the person is not doing it for the wrong reasons, an elective surgery is in the same boat as all the other methods women use to improve their appearance using artificial means.

 

 

The difference is cosmetics, padded bras and corsets don't require an anesthesiologist, a scalpel or risk of death.

 

Big difference, really.

[emkay64]

Where did I ever say I was against elective surgery? You guys seem to have a great time making sh!t up just so you can talk trash.

 

 

 

Think of it like this, there are two mindsets to suicide, one is in the realm of mental illness, one is not. Knowing the difference will help you understand my possition on things like elective surgery.

 

 

In the situation you describe Ali, having elective surgery to help you find a healthy self image is perfectly reasonable, even my earlier "Devils advocate" possition with you on the belt deal was more to figure out the two sides of the destination, not a specific condemnation of any one procedure.

 

 

If you have a large amount of flabby flesh as a result of extreme weight loss then it is perfectly reasonable to want that removed and tightened up. If you can afford it, why not? If your money cannot be spent to make you feel better, then what is the point? I have a river house not because I need it but because in my life it is nice to

 

 

 

emkay,

 

I agree in part with your point but at the same time everything from tooth whiteners to makeup is used by women for one purpose, to improve their looks, to offer a better self image, to give confidence and happiness for the woman to face her world........is it really that much of a difference to get cosmetic surgery?

 

How long have padded bras and even padded pants been available on the market for women emkay? Let's look at the corset for example, first popular in the 1600's they were designed to draw in the waist and push up the breasts. Women have been using artificial means to alter their appearance for generations emkay, personally I feel as long as the person is not doing it for the wrong reasons, an elective surgery is in the same boat as all the other methods women use to improve their appearance using artificial means.

 

.

.

 

I don't live in the dark ages, and I don't advocate padding, corsets etc so that's lost on me. This was an opinion post and I'm entitled to mine.Teeth whitening for clean teeth so your teeth aren't yellow and nasty is a far cry from inserting silicone into your chest. Enhancement of existing beauty and features is completely fine to me. Removing or covering up what makes you unique is not. The article I posted accurately sums up my feelings. I'm appalled at the number of elective surgeries being performed in the under 18 category.

 

Your view is biased because your partner has had breast enlargement surgery..that's fine. My views are still unchanged.

[timesjoke]

The difference is cosmetics, padded bras and corsets don't require an anesthesiologist, a scalpel or risk of death.

 

Big difference, really.

 

Well I suppose if you feel any contact with a doctor means you can possibly die then I guess your right, but in this modern time and the ability to know the great from the average doctors we can certainly know that some things are perfectly safe so we are making informed decisions from a possition of safety and our desired conclusions.

 

My point about these things being similar is based on the mindset of a woman looking to use artifical means to "improve" her outward appearance is the same no matter what the method they use, it is still for one purpose, improving self image.

 

 

 

I don't live in the dark ages, and I don't advocate padding, corsets etc so that's lost on me. This was an opinion post and I'm entitled to mine.Teeth whitening for clean teeth so your teeth aren't yellow and nasty is a far cry from inserting silicone into your chest.

 

Dark ages? Ever hear of the wonder bra? The concept of padding is very much a modern idea that was started generations ago.

 

Why is yellow teeth nasty? Why do you believe yellow means not clean? Is this true or just something you feel is implied because of how it "looks"? Teeth turning yellow is perfectly natural and part of nature.

 

Enhancement of existing beauty and features is completely fine to me. Removing or covering up what makes you unique is not. The article I posted accurately sums up my feelings. I'm appalled at the number of elective surgeries being performed in the under 18 category.

 

So you say some forms of artificial enhancement is fine, but others are not? To me it is all based on the same mindset, looking to change who you are on the outside is all the same.

 

 

I agree with you on the under 18 category though, hell our bodies are still developing well into our 20's so why screw with it?

 

 

Your view is biased because your partner has had breast enlargement surgery..that's fine. My views are still unchanged.

 

I had the same views before her implants, if not why would I be with her or pay for it? You should all know by now that I am very hard headed and will never change who I am for anyone, life is too precious to sell out your morals for companionship.

 

My view is based on the relative safety of modern and skilled Doctors and the fact that on a mindset level, the desire to have a better self image seems to be a deep rooted part of a woman's being.

[Ahhlee]

I can say this about my decision:

 

I'm paying for it myself.

 

I'm doing extensive research to make sure I know exactly what I'm going to get out of it and taking into account all the pros and cons.

 

My expectations are realistic.

 

I'm doing it for me, and for me only.

[Ahhlee]

I do feel like a bit of a hypocrite, though.

 

If emkay or merc....or eddo, came up to me and told me they were considering plastic surgery, I would say, "Nooooooo!!!! You're so beautiful!!!! Why would you want to undergo the risks?" and I would worry.

 

Yet I'm perfectly fine with wanting it for myself.

 

 

Odd.

[emkay64]

I don't disagree that a better self image is desired by women and also for men. I believe that plastic surgery has horribly skewed what is considered normal or acceptable in today's society. Why don't we see more clinics opening up to build the mental image for women instead of the damn external? A woman's personal worth, and success can all be attributed to a skinny ideal, large breasts, huge lips, expressionless faces, padded asses etc etc....I just can't advocate that. The huge rise in teen surgeries proves that. My reason for not partaking is because i choose to be a role model for my kids. Plain and simple.

 

Yellow teeth almost always imply a lack of personal hygiene and staining due to specific foods. I'm not going debate something so petty because it's ridiculous in comparison. A wonder bra, lipstick, and moisturizer, hair dye etc...are not permanent alterations on the body.

[Ahhlee]

I don't disagree that a better self image is desired by women and also for men. I believe that plastic surgery has horribly skewed what is considered normal or acceptable in today's society. Why don't we see more clinics opening up to build the mental image for women instead of the damn external? A woman's personal worth, and success can all be attributed to a skinny ideal, large breasts, huge lips, expressionless faces, padded asses etc etc....I just can't advocate that. The huge rise in teen surgeries proves that. My reason for not partaking is because i choose to be a role model for my kids. Plain and simple.

 

Your girls are BLESSED to have a mom like you!

 

My mom is a Saint. OMG, she sacrificed everything for us kids and worked damn hard to make ends meet, but she was always lamenting about how she wished she were skinnier, or had better hair or....you get the idea. I learned severe self-criticism from her.

 

My dad didn't help matters as he was self-absorbed, unaffectionate and I can recall one time....ONCE...when I was dressed up for a wedding and he said I looked beautiful.

 

My self esteem has taken a tremendous hit recently and I'm dealing with a lot right now. Unfortunately, I've pushed people I care about away because of it and I need to get past the past and push on to accept the new me that is emerging.

 

And honestly, I think the new me is going to be pretty damn amazing.

[mercury]

The old you is pretty damn amazing.

[Ahhlee]

The old you is pretty damn amazing.

 

OMFG Kelly....you just made me tear up!!!!!!!

 

Holy hell.

[emkay64]

Awwwww....group hug...or group sex...whichever...it's all love.

[mercury]

OMFG Kelly....you just made me tear up!!!!!!!

 

Holy hell.

 

Sorry... just sharing the facts.

[emkay64]

I often wonder if a person deciding to undergo plastic surgery, had everyone around them saying..."please don't do it...I don't want you to change....I love everything about you"...if that came from spouses, friends and family...I wonder if they'd bother?

 

Instead most say "If it's what you want"...or "If it makes YOU happy".....those comments to me just sort of say ......yah...you could probably use some improving or basically saying it's great to surgically improve...I just wonder.

 

Hmmmm.......

[mercury]

That's a good question, emkay.

 

I have one friend that has already had an extensive amount of botox, restalin, chemical peels, dermabrasion and all that good stuff. I think she's addicted to the stuff and she's only 35 (36 maybe?). She spends a couple thousand dollars every 3-6 months and is fully committed to continuing the practice. I don't think she needs it. I don't think she ever did, but I've never told her that. I don't think it would change her mind, though.

[Ahhlee]

I often wonder if a person deciding to undergo plastic surgery, had everyone around them saying..."please don't do it...I don't want you to change....I love everything about you"...if that came from spouses, friends and family...I wonder if they'd bother?

 

Instead most say "If it's what you want"...or "If it makes YOU happy".....those comments to me just sort of say ......yah...you could probably use some improving or basically saying it's great to surgically improve...I just wonder.

 

Hmmmm.......

 

Boy, I think you're on to something.

 

I guess my stance is I decided it's what I want to do and I have the means to do it. My family and friends keep asking, "Are you SURE you need it?" because they know if they tell me "You don't need that!" I'll be even more prone to do it because I'm a rebellious little sh!t.

 

If I had a spouse telling me that he loved me no matter what and insisting I didn't need it, would it change my mind?

 

I can honestly say....I don't know.

[timesjoke]

I don't disagree that a better self image is desired by women and also for men. I believe that plastic surgery has horribly skewed what is considered normal or acceptable in today's society. Why don't we see more clinics opening up to build the mental image for women instead of the damn external? A woman's personal worth, and success can all be attributed to a skinny ideal, large breasts, huge lips, expressionless faces, padded asses etc etc....I just can't advocate that. The huge rise in teen surgeries proves that. My reason for not partaking is because i choose to be a role model for my kids. Plain and simple.

 

Yellow teeth almost always imply a lack of personal hygiene and staining due to specific foods. I'm not going debate something so petty because it's ridiculous in comparison. A wonder bra, lipstick, and moisturizer, hair dye etc...are not permanent alterations on the body.

 

Well I think it is a tad simplistic to lump all those who get plastic surgery into one group, even when I go against abortions I always leave room for the exceptions in every norm because I know it is impossible to lump everyone together.

 

I think your a great mom and your working hard to set a great example, as do I in my every day life by rarely drinking and never getting drunk and setting a very high moral standard just to name a couple things. One of the things we discussed openly even to my young daughter was how Tami was a mature woman who was already where her body could take her and no amount of hard work on her part would give her a more balanced body image. We spent a lot of time on research and selecting the right doctor so from day one we at least showed that it was an important decision and not to be done rashly.

 

 

I often wonder if a person deciding to undergo plastic surgery, had everyone around them saying..."please don't do it...I don't want you to change....I love everything about you"...if that came from spouses, friends and family...I wonder if they'd bother?

 

Instead most say "If it's what you want"...or "If it makes YOU happy".....those comments to me just sort of say ......yah...you could probably use some improving or basically saying it's great to surgically improve...I just wonder.

 

Hmmmm.......

 

I would have to ask when is it a woman puts on her makeup?

 

Does she get up in the morning and completely "fix" herself up even if she is staying home or does she instead not concern herself with how her family and visiting friends see her but take the time to apply her makeup when she is going to work or going shopping where all she will see is strangers or other people who are not close to her?

 

More often than not I believe most of a woman's work to external improvements is not for the people she is closest to in life.

 

 

Let's look to Ali, she is well thought of, she has lots of friends who like/love her for who she is and has spoken of dating and such so she has companionship as she is, there is no "need" for the help she can get from cosmetic surgery other then her self image.......and from everything I have seen in my life, this is a valid point and I believe perfectly natural.

 

 

I will agree that nurture plays a big part of this, but it really is a core issue to "feel" beautiful.

[emkay64]

I know. I considered discussing it with the kids, but it still leaves some seeds in their mind. Emily has already had issues. For 2 weeks straight when she was 5 years old she cried every time she looked in the mirror, because she felt she looked "different" than everyone else.

 

Why did Tami feel her body was "unbalanced"? It's the perception that really needs to change...not cup size. Whether or not she's old enough...it still tells your daughter that Tami didn't feel her breasts were adequate...and in all likelihood if your daughter were to look the same later in life, she would see that someone she cares about thought that wasn't adequate and maybe...maybe she needed some work done. I'm not saying she will feel like that for sure...I'm saying the potential for damage is there. I personally don't need any more potential here.

[Ahhlee]

One thing I can say is that I'm only seeking to restore what I originally had. I'm definitely not looking to alter myself severely.

 

And as much as I look to Dolly Parton as my personal ideal </sarcasm> the thought of two giant beach ball looking protusions sticking out from my chest makes me want to puke. I'll stick with the soft, natural look, thanks....lol.