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Posted

"The only way you would be remembered by jumping off a building is if you landed on Joan Cusack."

:p I love that scene...

And then I felt chills in my bones / The breath I saw was not my own

I knew my skin that wrapped my frame / Wasn't made to play this game

XXI

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Posted

Omfg! I love this show!

My favorite episode is when its New Years and they thing Y2K is gonna happen and it does and stuff!

I freaking love it <33333

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Posted

Hmm WHO DOESN'T?

 

I like American Dad.. but to tell you the truth.. if you just watched the first episode and stopped.. I don't blame you because the first episode really didn't put an affect on anymore. The next episodes though are great!

 

FAMILY GUY RULZ

~Izzmo

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Posted

Quagmire at the strip club

Quagmire: " Alll right. Oh no, no, it's not all right, I'm outta cash! Hey, you take bank cards ? "

Dancer: " Sure "

Quagmire: [swipes card] " Can I get stamps too ? "

 

Chris Griffin: Hey, birthday dude! You want some ice cream?

Stewie Griffin: Yes, but no sprinkles. For every sprinkle I find, I shall kill you.

 

Stewie Griffin: [making kissing noises] Oh, I love you, mommy.

Lois Griffin: Oh, aren't you affectionate today?

[stewie making kissing noises]

Lois Griffin: [short pause] Stewie! Did you unhook Mommy's bra?

Posted
"Yeah...yeah thats it....take it off....oh Oh no OH NO They spotted me!"

And then I felt chills in my bones / The breath I saw was not my own

I knew my skin that wrapped my frame / Wasn't made to play this game

XXI

Posted
Family Guy is awsome...

~Lisa AKA Knife~

 

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"You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories" -Stainslaw J. Lec

Posted

(Brian, Chris's teacher, gave him an F in class)

Peter: When teachers gave us Fs, we would egg his house!

Chris: Yea lets do it!

Peter: Where does he live?

Chris: Ill show you!

(runs our door, points at their house)

Chris: He lives there!

(starts throwing eggs)

Brian: (walks out) What the hell are you doing?

Peter: Is that him?

Chris: Yea!

Peter: RUN!

 

Haha that was soooo funny!

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Posted

Family Guy is teh funniest show on tv next to teh most disgusting funny show on tv (South Park) which said "shit" 162 times in 20 minutes. Family Guy is simply my favoritestest show of all time =D. But anyway...quotes from FG.

 

(Family is in a fight and Peter punches Lois)

Lois: Hey! You can't hit me! I'm A Girl!

Peter: Sometimes I wonder...

______________________________________

 

Stewie: The life of the wife is ended by the knife

______________________________________

 

Meg (to boy): Please go out with me. I'm just trying to make Neil jealous. I promise I'll pay and everything.

Boy: Yeah...uhh...that sounds cool but I'm gonna be in the hospital that night.

(shoots himself in the stomach with a nail gun)

______________________________________

 

Stewie: There's always been a lot of tension between Lois and me, and it's not so much that I want to kill her, it's just, I want her not to be alive anymore.

______________________________________

 

Auctioner: Our first item is a pair of panties confiscated from a prostitute.

Quagmire: Fifty bucks.

Auctioner: She had nine STDs.

Quagmire: Forty-five bucks.

Auctioner: And when we caught her she wet herself.

Quagmire: Fifty bucks.

 

(My all time favorite)

______________________________________

 

Peter: Oh my god, Brian, there's a message in my Alphabits. It says, 'Oooooo.'

Brian: Peter, those are Cheerios.

______________________________________

 

Peter (narrating his life): "I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I looked with a grimace at the questionable meal Lois had placed in front of me. Of course I'd never tell her how disgusted I was with her cooking, but somehow I think she knew. Lois had always been full of energy and life, but lately I had begun to grow more aware of her aging. The bright, exuberant eyes that I had fallen in love with were now beginning to grow dull and listless with the long fatigue of a weary life. (Lois knocks Peter out.)

I woke several hours later in a daze."

______________________________________

 

Peter (after Lois tells him he's childish): If I'm a child, that means you're a pedophile, and I'll be damned if I get lectured by a pervert.

______________________________________

 

Stewie (to Jeremy, the babysitter's boyfriend):

Ha! I got your hat! Take that, hatless! Now go back to the quad and resume your hackey sac tourney! I'm not gonna lay down for some frat boy bastard with his damn teether sandals and his Skoal Bandits and his Abercrombie and Fitch long sleeved, open stitched, crew neck Henley smoking his sticky buds out of a soda can while watching his favorite downloaded Simpsons episodes every night! Yes, we all love "Mr. Plow"! Oh, you've got the song memorized, do you? SO DOES EVERYONE ELSE! That is exactly the kind of idiot you see at Taco Bell at 1 in the morning! The guy who just whiffed his way down the bar skank ladder!

_____________________________________

 

Guy on Airplane: "Oh great, I always end up sitting next to a damn baby."

Stewie: "What did you just say?"

Lois: "Stewie, stop fussing."

Stewie: "Pipe down Lois." (Slaps guy on head) "Hey big man, turn around. Oh you can't hear me now. I was going to watch the movie, but forget it. For the next 5 hours, your my bitch."

_____________________________________

 

Stewie: Well, I'd love to stay and chat, but you're a total bitch.

_____________________________________

 

Lois: Oh, I haven't been on a college campus in years. Everything seems so different.

Stewie: Really? Perhaps if you laid on your back with your ankels behind your ears that would ring a few bells.

_____________________________________

 

Lois: Peter,why are we stopped?

Peter: Yeah, I'll have three cheeseburgers...

Lois: Peter for God's sakes she's havin' a baby!

Peter: Oh that's right...and a kid's meal... and uh,I, I guess I'll have fries...if I have fries is anyone else gonna have any? Cuz,uh I don't wanna be the only one eatin' them... I'll feel like a fatty.

_____________________________________

 

Dennis Miller: I don't wanna go on a RANT here but America's foreign policy makes about as much sense as Beowolf having sex with Robert Fulton at the first Battle of Antetum. I mean when a neo-conservative defenstrates it's like Raskalnakov filibuster dioxymonohydrostinate.

Peter: What the hell does RANT mean?

_____________________________________

 

Stewie: I was under the impression the name of the show was "Kids Say the Darndest Things," not "Old Black Comedians Never Shut the Hell Up."

_____________________________________

 

(Lois finds a note in Chris' pocket)

Lois: Huh, what's this? You know Stewie, Mommy doesn't usually read things out of Chris's pocket. She's more respectufl than that.

Stewie: Whatever helps you sleep at night, bitch."

 

(3rd favorite)

_____________________________________

 

Lois: Honey, what do you say we uh...christen these new sheets, huh?

Peter: Why Lois Griffin, you naughty girl.

Lois: Hehehe...that's me.

Peter: You dirty hustler.

Lois: Hehehehe...

Peter: You filthy, stinky prostitute.

Lois: Aha, ok I get it...

Peter: You foul, venerial disease carrying, street walking whore.

Lois: Alright, thats enough!

 

(Second favorite)

 

_____________________________________

Rehab is for quitters... alcohol is what quitters need

 

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Posted
Good 1 LinkinParkFanArtie!!!i love those qoutes....

~Lisa AKA Knife~

 

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"You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories" -Stainslaw J. Lec

Posted

 

Peter (narrating his life): "I walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. I looked with a grimace at the questionable meal Lois had placed in front of me. Of course I'd never tell her how disgusted I was with her cooking, but somehow I think she knew. Lois had always been full of energy and life, but lately I had begun to grow more aware of her aging. The bright, exuberant eyes that I had fallen in love with were now beginning to grow dull and listless with the long fatigue of a weary life. (Lois knocks Peter out.)

I woke several hours later in a daze."

______________________________________

 

 

(Lois finds a note in Chris' pocket)

Lois: Huh, what's this? You know Stewie, Mommy doesn't usually read things out of Chris's pocket. She's more respectufl than that.

Stewie: Whatever helps you sleep at night, bitch."

 

(3rd favorite)

_____________________________________

 

I laughed SO hard i think my parents are signing me into some clinic for crazy people...not good

Posted
brokenangel lol your so funni

~Lisa AKA Knife~

 

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"You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories" -Stainslaw J. Lec

Posted
Thanks darkangel ^^... I love teh show and I cant get enough of it. I have seasons 1-3 and I cant stop watching them.

Rehab is for quitters... alcohol is what quitters need

 

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Posted

You can always type stuff out instead of abbreviating. :p

 

Yeah, I really need to get some Family Guy DVDs...I didn't get to see alot of the first episodes.

And then I felt chills in my bones / The breath I saw was not my own

I knew my skin that wrapped my frame / Wasn't made to play this game

XXI

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