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Posted

omg, you guys have foony ones. heres another one, not funny, but worth a try:

 

andrew: *puts his pencil on my desk* go getchur own!

me: what the hell

andrew: don't start with me *in a girly voice*

 

me: you guys can come over to my place.

stephanie: cool!

jane: when?

me: at ten or eleven at night. thats when i sleep.

stephanie: whats the point?

me: you can molest me around that time.

 

mike: you got a problem with that, officer? *whips his hair off his face*

andrew: yo! i own that!!

mike: *laughs* oh yeah...how does that work again?

andrew: you got a problem with that...*lifts his shirt and pinches his nipple*..officer?

me: what the fuck? put that shirt down, the teacher's there!

[broken External Image]:http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y12/Shadow_Serpent/darkslidesig.jpg

Madd props go to Shadow_Serpent

::~proud member of the CoS::candle lighter~::

 

I'll drag your body to the car as blood races down my arms

Posted

lmao, me and my mom were in the Fred Meyers parking lot

 

Me: Holy Cow! the moon is bright!

Mom: What? where?

Me:Over there, by the car dealership!

Mom: that thing behind the trees

Me: YEAH!

Mom: *pause* Taylor, thats the burger king sign...

Me: o

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http://www.sucksbbs.net/data/MetaMirrorCache/bb2dcf01aaef6417df375864d8457158.gif

 

myspace|peta2

Posted

This is from one of the Halo books, 'The Flood'

 

"All right," Major Silva boomed as he strode out onto the center of the catwalk. "Listen up! Play time is over. Captain Keyes is tired of our company and wants us to leave this tub. There's a construct down there, complete with an atmosphere, gravity, and the one thing Marines love like beer - and that's dirt beneath our feet."

The ODST officer paused at that point, allowing his bright, beady eyes to sweep the faces around him, his mouth straight as a crease. "Most of the crew - not to mention your fellow jarheads - will be leaving the ship in lifeboats. They'll ride to the surface in air-conditioned comfort, sipping wine, and nibbling on appetizers."

"Not you however. Oh no, you're going to leave the Pillar of Autumn by a different method. Tell me boys & girls... How will you leave?"

It is a time-honored ritual, and the ODST Marines roared the answer in unison. "WE GO FEET FIRST, SIR!"

"Damned right you do," Silva barked. "Now, lets get to those drop pods. The Covenant is holding a picnic on the surface, and every single one of you are invited. You have five minutes to strap in, hook up, and shove a cork in your ass."

Good bye, auf wiedersehen, adiós, sayonara

Gone

Posted

heres a new one I got from my first cheerleading practice as the mascot

 

Sara:Who let the bitch onto the field?

phi (me): I did, now if you don't mind....

(takes off shoes and sits in the grass)

sara: What are you doing freak?

Phi: I'm about to throw my left shoe at you.

(throws shoe and it clocks her in the chest)

Sara: that hurt, you said you were throwing your left shoe.

Phi: that is my left shoe.

Sara: But it says right on it.

Phi:your suposed to know your right from your left. I write it oppasite to confuse people like you.

Sara: what?

(I pat her on the head)

Phi: don't worry little girl some day you'll know as much as I do.

sara: what are you doing now?

(picks up shoe and puts it on foot)

Phi: Me CJ Bessie and Nathan are going to donut dunk you into a toilet and then shove you in a locker.

Sara: (runs screaming)

http://www.sucksbbs.net/data/MetaMirrorCache/905b4d5028c3e3d1ceb11b9069165e4b.jpg

 

"You can't please everyone and trying to do so is the kiss of death."- criss angel

Posted

Flow like water, strike like a tiger, defend like a rock.

 

that was what my sensei told me.

http://www.sucksbbs.net/data/MetaMirrorCache/905b4d5028c3e3d1ceb11b9069165e4b.jpg

 

"You can't please everyone and trying to do so is the kiss of death."- criss angel

Posted
lmao well I mean that not-hot ppl can also be good' date=' not that just some of them are :p[/quote']

lol Sammi it was mostly the comment on the rain that cracked me up XD

[broken External Image]:http://img259.imageshack.us/img259/2784/lpfas08mostintelligentym8.jpg

 

Posted

well lol to a person who didn't see the whole convo, it must be weird to see you say something about hot ppl, and the just say you like rain XD

 

like you're saying you don't want love, you want rain :p

[broken External Image]:http://img259.imageshack.us/img259/2784/lpfas08mostintelligentym8.jpg

 

Posted

imagine that you have an apple tree. i would rather sort out the bad apples from the good right out of the tree, so i wouldn't waste my time shaking the damn tree into one basket and THEN sorting everything out.

 

weird metaphor about how to chose your friends.

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