Phranka/Franka's Journal

[Phranka]

For some reason I thought lets start a journal,

well I just wanted to tell something about my life..

 

Today I had no school, Never have school on tuesdays, pretty relaxed huh?

was enough to do though.. Had to finish my Papers (you knoww bringing papers to houses)..

Glad that I'm giving that up ¬¬

 

and well then I had therapy(yes I guess I'm so hopeless that I need that)

It's therapy against shyness, insecureness etc.

I have it for a half year now and I guess I can see a little change..

cause for a long time I didn't dare to talk to anybody, don't talk much now eather, but more than usual..

 

I have to do exercizes like, trying to talk to strangers or just ask someone a question.

 

well this was what I wanted to say.. don't know where or to who I could say this, sorry about some weird spelling or word choices ¬¬

[Friðbjörn]

Nice journal

 

I could use something against my shyness...

[Phranka]

Hehe I'm just bad

[Dark Angel]

Hey, haven't seen you around here. Well, hi anyways. I'm Erica.

Hum, shyness? I'm also shy, but I think talking on forums and chats to people you hardly know helps. I mean, I talk more in class, and more outgoing then I was a year ago.

Well, nice journal, hope you continue to write in it!

[By_My-elf]

Hey, haven't seen you around here. Well, hi anyways. I'm Erica.

Hum, shyness? I'm also shy, but I think talking on forums and chats to people you hardly know helps. I mean, I talk more in class, and more outgoing then I was a year ago.

Well, nice journal, hope you continue to write in it!

 

Yes pretty good I'm a shy guy as well

but you are shy gurl's

[Phranka]

Yeah my mom is all acting like I don't give a shit about my therapy and she doesn't know if we should go on with it or not..

 

but I do care, I wanna change..

[By_My-elf]

oh yeah but it's just your attitude and your point of view toward's thing's

[Phranka]

yeah I forget appointments sometimes.. I hate me for that..

 

But this time I've done much, I wrote down my exercizes and explained my mentor what's the thing that makes me shy, My negative thoughts that is, thinking what kind of reaction they would give me if I say anything.

 

Now I have to try and change that into positive thoughts..

[By_My-elf]

i doesn't depend on your shyness I'm like that i found out i have lot's of friend's but i just neglect them i have about twenty

I never knew that even tough I'm a shyguy

[Phranka]

I'm a little distant against my friends I guess, well I don't really dare to call them friends, afraid of losing them with that, like sometime..

 

my shyness against them isn't too big though.. the only thing I don't do is tell them personal things, they know nothing about me.. I know they should but that is REALLY the hardest thing for me to do... :\

[By_My-elf]

yeah know what you mean I've lost a lot of 'em this past summer I felt

lost did'nt know what friend's were but friend's are ppl that actually care about you and look out for you and ppl you could feel comfortable around

and ppl that will understand you and trust and have a close bond like bro and sis

[Phranka]

Yeah they are always nice to me and when people do that I think automatically

that they I faking it, 'cause I don't trust much people anymore..

 

my former "friends" didn't wanna hang out with me anymore because I said too less,

thanks to my shyness I lost them -.-

[By_My-elf]

yes but find ppl who will listen and you feel comfortable about that's what I'm trying to say not ppl who use you for stuff

[Phranka]

yeh I hope I get to do more outside of school with the people I talk to..

I'd love to open up to them..

 

But after that incident I was claimed "Depressive" and that's how they found out that my shyness was a serious thing.

I never should have joined them and just stick with my then-friend.. who is now my friend again.. lucky to have though I don't understand why she would be my friend after that.

[By_My-elf]

depressive huh MY shyness turned worse than that it turned to panic attack's so bye now g2g

[Phranka]

Well bye byee, I'm just blabbing here.. all this uninteressting complaining stuff in my journal bumming you guys out ô.O

 

[Oohw I have over 100 posts now]

[Phranka]

4:50 PM NL time:

 

I was dreaming about LPF last night. you know weird topics and reactions.. can remember some but I don't remember names c:..

 

well much more I didn't do.. school was boring like always, had to write an english letter which was veeery easy c:..

 

and I just got home (4:10 pm) And I'm watching "Corpse Bride" with my dad c:..

[By_My-elf]

hmmmm you and me too could'nt stop thinking about ti too

and dreamed anput it

and your not bumming me out from you complaint's I had fun talking yesterday

[Phranka]

thanks.. I think I'm getting addicted to this forum c;

[By_My-elf]

yeah me too it's cool here I love it here

[Phranka]

And we made a class-picture.. just an amateur picture with a digital camera

since we don't usually do that at my school anymore.. but we did it for my math-teacher's birthday tommorow who is also our class-mentor.. but he's pretty cool! C:

 

I don't think I look very bad on it.. lucky then.. I'll post it here if somehow get it..

can't wait for my senior prom next year c:.. still need a dress and a date I guess.. well or I will just go alone o.ô

the theme is going to be American-Highschool.. haha

we're gonna have a yearbook and stuff (NL schools don't usually do that eather).

all that organizing is pretty hectic. but I'm not with that.

[By_My-elf]

yeah my math teacher is the only cool teacher here

ever swear word we use he turn's it into a joke

[Phranka]

yeah mine turns 31 or so tommorrow.. and he's just nice, good class-mentor I'd say.. especially for a group like mine (31 students)

[By_My-elf]

whoa that's alot we have like 15 not much

[Phranka]

yeah our group is a real pain in the ass.. Offcourse I'm the quietest

 

there are 3 main characters who are really bad..