Phranka/Franka's Journal

[Phranka]

heehee.. I can finally call you blonde

[Phranka]

Mmm my journal is like the same every post xD

sorry bout that.

I guess this thing is number one on my mind right now.

 

so anyways.. went over yesterday. he was playing WoW. then he went to shower and I could use his comp's msn.

when he was done he played some bass n stuff.

 

then we decided to watch the movie. The Number 23 with Jim Carrey.

after that we watched some anime. I got bored with it and payed more atention to him xD. the rest of the night we spent cuddling, laughing, tickling.

 

I think I'm really getting used to him now, I can make jokes and comments without hesitation. and he's got his faith back and is starting to like our get togethers.

 

Still waiting for a certain something though.

 

Oh really awkward we were just relaxing when my phone rings. my mom called and ask how long I was planning on staying. it was 1 am xD (I went there around 7 pm)

totally didn't wanna leave. really funny after I got home I was really giddy all of the sudden. my parents thought I had alcohol or something. xD

[Black_Angel]

Haha aww that's cute! My parents would never let me stay at a boy's house until anywhere near 1am so think yourself lucky haha ^^

[Linkin_lp_park]

Haha aww that's cute! My parents would never let me stay at a boy's house until anywhere near 1am so think yourself lucky haha ^^

 

Don't it depends on what kinda boy?

Won't they even let you there if it was 'the perfect son in law' ? lol

I mean, in my mind a guy should ALWAYS bring a girl home (not if his leg is broken or something..you know what i mean:-P)

[Jeezy]

Sounds like you guys are getting closer now

 

can anyone tell me what's so interesting about WoW...

[Black_Angel]

Haha, you don't know my parents, they're kinda scary when it comes to boys. Though if they'd met him before and knew what he was like (and liked him, obv) then they probably wouldn't mind as much!

 

 

Oh and Jeezy I think WoW is gay too, a load of lads at my school play it and they lose sleep cause they play it too much lol.

[Phranka]

Haha my parents(dad xD) were mad actually.. and remco's 5,5 years older than me. and they're not used to me being with a boy.. that never happens you know xD

he's a good guy though.in college, doesn't smoke or do drugs.

oh well they must be glad it didn't start at 14 or so..

 

and what's so interesting about WoW? idunno.. but he's addicted to it

[Friðbjörn]

seems like everything's going in the right direction

next time we'll read about how you got him off WoW...haha

[Phranka]

Okay so I started a bit serious talk on msn today with him..

 

I said I've been wondering if I'm just a project to him or he also cares atleast a little about me..

he said yes but he isn't a person who hops into a relationship quickly.

 

and he likes how things are right now.

he also said that maybe I shouldn't wait until he is ready for one,

but I said I think he's worth it and even if he isn't I'd get something out of it,

we came to an agreement on that

so now that I know that I don't have to be so paranoid.

 

going over there tomorrow.

probably do what we've been doing for the last weeks.

and I don't really mind atm.

[Black_Angel]

Well it's good that you kinda know where you stand now :]

 

If you two don't kiss soon I'm gonna come over there and make you!

[Phranka]

So friday he texted me if I felt like coming over. I said I'd love to but didn't hear from him all day.

when he got online he said his grandmother was dying, and was feeling a little sad, after hesitating he asked me to come over anyways, he needed some distraction.

 

when I got there he didn't seem sad at all. he actually couldn't stop talking, making jokes and stuff.

probably a way to cover it up.

well we watched a movie (Disturbia, it wasn't very good in our opinion).

after, we cuddled and stuff. and our faces were like a cm away from each other.

and yes we've kissed a few times. it was nice (:

he walked me home afterwards.

 

when I talked to him yesterday he said his grandmother died yesterday morning

talked to him today about his feelings and stuff. I said he didn't seem down at all friday. but he's actually cried.

if only boys could show their feelings more easily.

 

he said he needs time to get over this.

and he didn't even feel like coming to my friend's birthday party with me,

oh well.. I'm pretty patient.

[Friðbjörn]

it's probably better he stay at home alone getting over it rather than going to a party with you, not enjoying one minute of it.

that's how I'd feel I think

[Phranka]

why do guys assume you get rid of problems by running from them and hiding them.

isn't talking the best way?

[Black_Angel]

Guys generally find it harder to show their feelings than girls, they don't want people to think that they're weak or anything... Just give him some time to grieve, absence makes the heart grow fonder :]

[Jeezy]

Guys don't hide their problems, they try to solve them on their own

[Phranka]

well I hope it doesn't take too long.. cause I miss him

[Friðbjörn]

why do guys assume you get rid of problems by running from them and hiding them.

isn't talking the best way?

it's not running away and hiding, it's resolving things on your own.

but it's different with each person obviously.

depends on each person how much space they need, and how soon they feel like talking about it, if at all

[Phranka]

meh I still feel like helping him some way..

just want him to know that I'm there for him.

[allieking]

boys think atlking about their problems makes them less, manly. he needs time hun, its hard when someone close to you dies and maybe hes not comfortable about you seeing him upset. its not a way of avoiding you.

[Phranka]

So.. this news is probably gonna shock you and make you object and stuff but here it is.

 

Had a serious talk after like 2 weeks. and right now he's very focussed on his education

and he doesn't want a serious relationship yet, especially with a 17 year old.

so we'll stay between friends and that for a while probably.

 

you could see it as an open relationship. we just hang out to have fun.

and it's possible we find other people along the way.

I've told him I don't wanna get too intimate with someone who doesn't

want a serious relationship cause I'd never have sex with someone

who doesn't LOVE me.

 

you're probably gonna say he's using me etc.

but be a little understanding.

I gotta make myself to like him less cause otherwise I'll end up hurt.

 

[Jeezy]

^^ I think that's cool

[Friðbjörn]

that's so sad...

[allieking]

i totally understand franka. its good that you told him you don't wanna get to intimate, you don't wanna give yourself to just anyone.

[Sygy]

sigh, oh well. i think you made the right decision.

[Friðbjörn]

so who's the guy you like now?