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Posted

So this is the speak your mind forum is it?

 

Well I went to the pub on Friday night and got drunk on cider. I eventually told my friend that I fancied upgrading to a commercial pilot license and starting up my own airline and told him about having a look on line at planes and the stupid costs of buying a new one compared to buying an old or classic plane. You know thats how they keep the price of shit high, the dont classify it as old or on its last legs, the simply put the words classic in its place, anyway I was looking at the price of a Douglas C-3 and fuck me they want $500,000 dollars for it. allright its got some history to it, but anything from 1937 is going to have some history surely. I can buy a small used jet and probably get better miles out of it than a prop, allright they had put lots of shit inside of it but it still wasnt worth half a million which was in US dollars, perhaps if it had been in canadian dollars which are worthless I could have raided my kids piggy bank and bought the crate for peanuts. Anyway we get to the next pub along our regular route and find that the quiz machine has been replaced with a 'better' quiz machine. Better? To fuck it is! The questions are crap and the gameplay sucks, you try complaining to the landlord but he tells you that he was instructed by the local brewery tyo have it installed which is his answer to everything from the price of his beer to why bogs are still blocked and the hand dryer doesnt work. I go into the pub to relax not skid across the fucking mens room, they have ice rinks for that shit. Talking of which I've been ice skating twice in my life, the first time I was on my arse more than on my feet and the second time I busted my knee on the ice. Not once did I see a fit figure skater on the ice. You know the ones I mean, short skirt, does lots of spinning so you can see up her short skirt. Billiant, but I didnt fucking see any.

Anyway back to the pub. We're necking back the ciders and our brain cells are going to hell, when this fat cow comes up to us and tries copping off with both of us, She wore ugly like it was fashion. What is it with fat birds? They get a few drinks under their wings then think that everyone else is suddenly going to fancy them. I couldnt have fancied this one unless I had drunk ennough to pass out, which you dont want anyway incase she does take advantage of you and you wake up to find her rubbing her minge on your face. I told the fat bitch, "You're ugly". She needed telling, otherwise someone might break her heart by pretending to be interested before nipping off to the bogs and escaping through the window. She didnt take it lightly, how could she? she was fat, and started shouting and screaming at me in the pub. Eventually the landlord came over and asked her to leave, then after 10 minutes he asked us to leave. I found this annoying and I explained what we had said to her. we said she was from the local nuthouse and would probably be waiting for us with a pizza in one hand and an icepick in the other, so he let us stay and we drank some more.

Closing time we decided to go for a indian supper. This is not North American indians, who I think are pretty cool characters or at least they didnt spit in my face when I went to one of their casinos when I visted the states, but the asian indian, the type of place you only go if youre tanked up. Anyway we ordered our food, I remember I ordered a Dhansak and Tim ordered something stpidly hot, not that I was going to be impressed, I was already drunk, nothing seems to impress me much when I'm drunk. Being impressed whilst drunk is confusing. anyway we ate what ever they gave us, which we believe was the correct food but you never know with these people, and afterwards the billcomes and we decide to split the bill and as quickly as we put the money down the waiter picks it up and fucks off sharpish. after ten minutes finihsing off our drinks the little fucker still hasnt returned with the change so I have to fucking ask for my change. Whats the deal with that? 2 meals costing less than a

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Posted
So this is the speak your mind............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

 

Little hint for ya.

Nobody likes long winded posts. You got to get everybodies attention before thier gonna read that much.

"You can't stop insane people from doing insane things by passing insane laws. That's just insane!" Penn & Teller

 

NEVER FORGOTTEN

Posted
So this is the speak your mind forum is it?

 

Well I went to the pub on Friday night and got drunk on cider. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

Snooze fest.:(
I'm a liberal's worst nightmare. A black man with a brain! :D
Posted
Well this thread just went into the shitter huh?

"I wish I was in Tijuana, eating barbecued iguana." - Wall of Voodoo

 

http://www.sucksbbs.net/data/MetaMirrorCache/fb910e0baa5b4e108ffee98f66cdb3cc.gif

Posted

Speaking of shitters. How come all of a sudden the water pipes going to your shitter starts making noise. What's up with that?

 

Anyway that's whats on my mind right now.

"You can't stop insane people from doing insane things by passing insane laws. That's just insane!" Penn & Teller

 

NEVER FORGOTTEN

Posted
Speaking of shitters. How come all of a sudden the water pipes going to your shitter starts making noise. What's up with that?

 

 

They probably are in fear of the inevitable, incoming host of snafu shit.

To be the Man, you've got to beat the Man. - Ric Flair

 

Everybody knows I'm known for dropping science.

Posted

What's on my mind today?

 

Metrosexuals. A girl asked me if I was a metrosexual last night. I responded, "No, I am not a gay-male-lesbian.".

 

How could I be a metro, for Christ's sake? I pick my teeth with a pocket knife!

To be the Man, you've got to beat the Man. - Ric Flair

 

Everybody knows I'm known for dropping science.

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