Question for you all...

[Clogz]

Okay, here it goes.

 

Lets say that, two and a half years ago, you met a someone through a mutual friend. After chatting over the internet for a week or two and finding you had alot in common, you decide to meet and go out with some other people.

 

Lets say it was the best night of your life, and you felt like you had met someone really special. This person was fun, and just great to be with. Plus being pretty, and smart.

 

Now, after a second 'outting', you begin to realize just how crazy you are for this person. But, hot off the heels of a break-up, you are afraid of getting hurt again...and coupled with your natural shyness towards the opposite sex, you push this person away. You know, from the changing attitudes of this person's friends towards you, that it hurt them.

 

The question I ask is this: We both liked each other alot and had alot in common. I have grown up alot since then and feel like I can commit to the kind of relationship I would want to have with this girl. Is there still a shot? I feel the same about her as I did after that first night we met, and both of us still have alot in common (we still talk from time to time, when we see each other)...but I'm scared to ask if she feels the same.

 

Its been so long now...I think she still likes me, but if I'm wrong I will look so frikkin retarded. I just like this girl so much, and after finding out she has the same college plans as me, I need to figure out these feelings. Because I am going to see her again...any advice from anyone?

[misery]

It's tough to say if you have a shot or not. Just ask her if she wants to go catch a movie or something. If she says she's not interested, it's not that big of deal. Hell, if you're embarassed about her saying no, then you can just act like you meant as a friend. There's really nothing to lose, and there's a good chance she'll give you another chance.

 

Just my advice, take it or leave it

[diva__007]

yer, u should just try get her to hang out with u a bit first, then if it all goes well u can then prolly make something more of it

[Clogz]

Yeah, if I asked her to do something it would be kind of like a "we should hang out, and catch up on things" kind of thing...I've dated enough to know that rushing into relationships will kill them.

[geeko]

It's not really that you're rushing the person.Talk to her and explore your feelings for each other.Maybe through that way you can slowly work it out.

[diana]

Well, you should just try and get closer with her...I'm leaving you the ways and stuff...I'm just saying you should...Why? Cuz the whole life is risk and you should take it now too...If you don't do it, you'll never know and this would be harder than getting rejected!

This is what I think...

[Jeezy]

You should try to get close to her again....if you don't try, you'll maybe regret it your whole life

[Black_Angel]

I say go for it, you'll be left wondering what could have happened if you don't.

 

Good luck! :]

[Dark Angel]

You should try to get close to her again....if you don't try' date=' you'll maybe regret it your whole life[/quote']

I agree with Jeezy on this one. At least you can say you tried, and don't regret a thing, instead of never trying, and wondering what could have been, you know?

[Clogz]

I agree with Jeezy on this one. At least you can say you tried' date=' and don't regret a thing, instead of never trying, and wondering what could have been, you know?[/quote']

 

Yeah, thats my biggest fear. I've just got so much crap going on with myself right now...I just wish things could be more simple for me. My problems are alot bigger then this, but don't get me wrong - all this helps alot. Thanks guys. :thumbsup:

[LPpinkfreak821]

as they said... hang with her again. invite her to a movie or to dinner. After about 3 dates ask her out. What do you have to lose? If she says no... then maybe thats for the best, but if she says yes then you win.

[majinkamahl]

Okay, here it goes.

 

Lets say that, two and a half years ago, you met a someone through a mutual friend. Always be wary of "friends of friends".Bad relationship voodoo will come back to bite you in the ass from more than one source. After chatting over the internet for a week or two and finding you had alot in common, you decide to meet and go out with some other people. Go out with other people was a wise choice, but your best bet is to always try to get neutral parties, and above all else, try to get them to be not her friends. Your friends are always better. Or the friends in which you met her through.

 

Lets say it was the best night of your life, and you felt like you had met someone really special. This person was fun, and just great to be with. Plus being pretty, and smart. Not to be pessimistic, but it sounds to be true. Not to mention, as a well versed veteran of the gender wars, ALL women have their insecurities. Hers might be one that would bother you.

 

Now, after a second 'outting', you begin to realize just how crazy you are for this person. But, hot off the heels of a break-up, you are afraid of getting hurt again...and coupled with your natural shyness towards the opposite sex, you push this person away. Big no no, my friend. Being aloof is the better of the two choices. Be "there" but be aware. Not push away. Just avoid closeness. Two entirely seperate things.You know, from the changing attitudes of this person's friends towards you, that it hurt them.Their opinions mean squat. What is important is what the two of you decide.

 

The question I ask is this: We both liked each other alot and had alot in common. You went from a hypothetical "me" to a realistic you. Who we talking about? Just teasing.I have grown up alot since then and feel like I can commit to the kind of relationship I would want to have with this girl. Is there still a shot? There always is. Play a smooth game, and go with the flow. Time your advances and don't be too aggressive. Girls' hearts are tender things. One hurt is enough to last a life time, so be gentle.I feel the same about her as I did after that first night we met, and both of us still have alot in common (we still talk from time to time, when we see each other)...but I'm scared to ask if she feels the same. The absolute worst she could say is no, so if you are prepared for that as a possibility, you don't have much to worry about. If chances are 50/50, and she liked you/thought you were cute/you have a lot in common...things already play out in your favour. Go for it, do not be a baby.

 

Its been so long now...I think she still likes me, but if I'm wrong I will look so frikkin retarded. Friend please. Like I said, worst case scenario, you get shut down. Shit happens. Pull up your pants and walk it off. There are about 5 billion other women on the planet, and you have many years to test the waters.I just like this girl so much, and after finding out she has the same college plans as me, I need to figure out these feelings. Because I am going to see her again...any advice from anyone? When it comes to matters of the heart, take my advice; the heart never speaks, but you must listen to it to know. If you understand that, you will understand what you have to do.

 

 

 

REP ME!!

~MK

[stupidsoul1]

If you have a shot, i say go for it.

I mean no matter how you look at it, it will be an awkward situation until you get the final answer anway.

[Clogz]

Not to bump this emo thread, but I need help and my situation has become majorly fucking compounded.

Tonight this girl saw me at a band contest...she proceeded to run up behind me, and hug me...and twirl us around (she must be strong or something, im like 190) Then she lets go of me and we start talking...

 

her - "Hey! I haven't seen you in forever" with a big smile on her face.

me - "Yeah, I haven't seen you either!"

her - "How are you?"

me - "I'm good."

her - "Thats cool! Well hey, I gotta go now. Catch 'ya later!" And she runs off.

 

This happened in front of alot of people...some of them being my girlfriend's friends. rather then have them tell her what happened. So I told her. Now I'm fucked...because I have to choose, basically. And no matter how much I try, I can't do it! I like my girlfriend alot, but I also like this other girl...and my girlfriend is basically telling me that if this happens again, then it is over, because she is done trying to deal with girls hitting on me all the time...

 

I don't know what to do... X/ (btw, if this shit is getting annoying, im sorry...)

[linkinpark-1]

There must be some trust issues between you and your girlfriend if she can't handle the fact that you catch other girl's eyes. I don't know what to tell you...but you just have to figure out which girl gives you that...feeling? lol...I don't know if I'm making any sense. But in my opinion, if you're even questioning your relationship with your girlfriend, then there must be something not right with your relationship. If you're in a relationship that you're really happy with...then you wouldn't have any doubts.

[Clogz]

There must be some trust issues between you and your girlfriend if she can't handle the fact that you catch other girl's eyes. I don't know what to tell you...but you just have to figure out which girl gives you that...feeling? lol...I don't know if I'm making any sense. But in my opinion' date=' if you're even questioning your relationship with your girlfriend, then there must be something not right with your relationship. If you're in a relationship that you're really happy with...then you wouldn't have any doubts.[/quote']

I'm not happy in my current relationship...but I'm afraid to say so. My biggest weakness is my seeming inability to tell people the truth about how I feel. I can't bring myself to break up with her...because, I am a wuss.

[FireHawk]

I'm not happy in my current relationship...but I'm afraid to say so. My biggest weakness is my seeming inability to tell people the truth about how I feel. I can't bring myself to break up with her...because' date=' I am a wuss.[/quote']

 

You need to end your current relationship clearly....and....

 

You need to learn how to end a relationship because look at it this way...I don't know how old you are so don't take this to literal. What if your with this same girlfriend (or another girl that dosen't make you happy), and say you were to get married. Would you want to live rest of your life unhappy, and knowing you were to weak to break up the relationship? Thats just one way to look at it.

[linkinpark-1]

I'm not happy in my current relationship...but I'm afraid to say so. My biggest weakness is my seeming inability to tell people the truth about how I feel. I can't bring myself to break up with her...because' date=' I am a wuss.[/quote']

 

well you know what you should do...now it's just a matter of actually doing it.

[stupidsoul1]

hahaha last time she hit you, so now you know what is coming.

 

Tell her that it is not fair for her if this keeps happening.

And it is for her own good.

[Clogz]

So, as furious as my girlfriend was about this other girl and our encounter...yeah, it turns out she was just lying. Apparently, she was under alot of 'stress'...that was her explanation for accusing me of liking someone else and dredging up alot of my feelings for this other girl. She also cited family problems.

I tore her head off for it. She has put me through hell, emotionally. She destroyed everything I felt for her...I can't trust her anymore, and I can't love her anymore. And on top of that, she forced me to confront this feelings I have for this other girl, and guess what? Now I like her again! I'm still not sure if my heart has survived all this lying and treachery, but its still beating so I guess that is a sign.

Either way, I'm pretty sure I'm ending it this time. And this time, its her fault.

Fuck it all. I'm fed up with this...I'm doing it tomorrow.

 

I'll read a differing opinion though...if someone has one...which I doubt.

[stupidsoul1]

I dont blame you, i am glad she made your mind up for you.

I have noticed alot of girls have a bad habit of doing shit like that,sorry she did that to you.

[HaziLPTonz]

well somttimes u only need a helping hand. and sometimes it comes form the most unlikely of places, its been awhile....whats happened?

 

ahaha, altho i still dont see why ur gf got pissed bcoz a frendgirl came up to ya and gave ya a hug. i thot it was normal for frends to hug one another in anycase. *shrugs*

[Clogz]

Yeah, I dumped her. Turns out that she may have been cheating on me too, because as soon as I dumped her, like literally two days later, there was this totally other guy that just came out of nowhere.

Not that i care, the only reason I brought it up was because three days later she called to apoligize to me for everything, and then I said, "What the hell are you doing?Get off the phone, I told you its over."

That felt good.

 

And Hazi, you have no idea how true that first line is....you really don't. Either way, I've decided not to pursue this girl as of yet. As soon the circumstances are right, I will try and start something. Right now, I am content with where I am. Single and Free, w00t!

[lstic]

Give it a shot.. I had a similar experience once and i've succeeded and i'm still with that girl...