Can't stay truthful

[LPpinkfreak821]

Yea... you shouldn't read this. Its just me.. ranting about something on my mind. so... it's pointless, but I need to get it off my mind & on to something else.

 

 

Ok... well I have a problem.

 

I can't stay true in relationships. I just can't. I've tried, but I fail.

 

I get bored too quickly &&& end up cheating with a guy that ACTUALLY interest me.

 

I can tell you that EVERY relationship I've been in... I've cheated.

 

& I dont know how, but I always fall for the wrong guy. The guy who wants to be your friend, but really wants to secretly be the freinds with benifits. I hate that. But I always go with it...

 

Why?

 

I'm not sure.

 

Then wrong guys that are involved with someone else, but I still get mixed in with them KNOWING that they are with someone else. Whats wrong with me?

 

me & my friend [Jake] always joke around and call each other whores. He's not a whore though. Yea, he sleeps around with A LOT of guys, but thats becasue he thinks he's in love. He's one of those people who NEEDS love! so he's being used but he doesn't know it. So he isn't a whore.

 

I am a whore. I dont sleep around, but pretty much [crossing that NEED TO KNOW line] do everything except intercourse. I see myself as a whore because I knowingly let guys use me.

 

Whats wrong with me?

 

I can't help it either. The oppurtunity comes around and I take it. I dont regret it... I just amaze myself.

 

 

Honestly... that's why I'm still a virgin. Because I'm afraid that if I lose it... I wont be able to control myself. I'll end up sleeping around and I dont want that.

 

I dont mean to waste your guys' time, but it's just on my mind. It's one of those things I have to get off my chest.. you know? I mean that's rare for me, but this is just one of those things.

 

I hate the term "fuck buddy". That bothers me. I hate the term & meaning. I can't be someone's fuck buddy because to me... that's disgusting & low. BUT that's basically what I do. Except without the actual fucking.

 

I can't stay true to anyone. I just can't. I get bored and move on.

 

I'm not a dating person. I always meet the wrong guys & end up wanting to just scream.

 

I guess I just haven't met the right guy, but I doubt I'll ever meet him. Or I'll meet him and fuck it up by cheating.

 

I dont know what it is, but cheating is like... a habit. a habit that I can't break. WHATS WRONG WITH ME!?

 

I'm sorry about this whole thread...

 

I'm ranting &&& feeling horrible. I just had to get it out of my head and put on something else. why not the internet... yea thats real genious right there.

 

 

the right guy will never happen for me. Never.

 

I dont like the whole clingly thing. I barely like cuddling. It's okay once in awhile, but not constantly. I like my personal space. . . I like my bubble. I love to laugh. Someone who can make me laugh is great. I mean just someone who can be funny, but serious [not too serious though]. I HATE control freaks.

 

I'm not picky, but when it comes to some things... Its this or that. I just dont get the chance to mix in with the right guys. I get stuck with assholes & users & sometimes the abusers. I'm sick of this shit. I'm ready to give up. I'm never going to meet the right person.

 

agian sorry for the ranting.... as I said before... I just needed to get it off my chest.

 

I amaze myself...

[stupidsoul1]

How old are you?

[Jeezy]

You are young...you want to have fun...and that is alright...when you get older you'll be able to stay true in a relationship...

[diana]

Hmmm, yeah...you are like 15 years old...well...you're gonna be 16 soon...I don't know where's the rush?? I mean, you don't need to find the right guy yet, you know...you really don't need that! There are rare people who find the real one at that age...+ I don't believe in "real one" person...it's all in the relation, respect and so on...first is love but this don't last long in the same shape...that's what I think about it...

However, I think it would be better for you if you stop thinkin about guys for a while...that's for like a year or something...so you can get yourself together and figure it out what you want...it would be pretty useful, I think...

And, if I can add...I too got tired of my last ex-bf...it got boring to me...but, it's okay...I don't care...we are now still buddies and it's all good...

Look, and if you're gonna have bfs and stuff...when you get tired just leave him, don't cheat! And start being more picky about them! Don't just get together with anyone that seems like it...NO! Simply stop! It's not that hard...I'm sure... The problem is just that you already gave up...I can see no reason, though...

 

Look, put yourself together...okay? And I hope I helped for at least a bit...Good luck!

[Clogz]

Don't struggle with the idea of a serious commitment right now, you are too young to be trying to make one. Trust me, high school is too dramatic to actually have a good relationship in (thats my opinion).

[LPpinkfreak821]

I'll be 16 soon

 

but see thats what I meant by "the right guy will never come for me"... I dont believe in the right guy. I'm not guy crazy. I swear. Any of my friends will tell you that. Its not something I focus on. But I do like to get out there once in awhile. You know?

 

Its just that everytime I get out there... it ends all screwed up. Because I either end up cheating [& someone said to just leave them if I get bored & want to cheat, but I dont want to leave someone for someone else. thats mean & I'll explain later] in a relationship or I end up getting used.

 

highschool for me isn't too dramatic. I tend to make friends with people who have their heads on their shoulders & not in their asses. Yea, there is always that person trying to start something, but that is RARE!

 

Plus, I dont like to date. Its too complicated. Like if I'm going to date someone... then I get to know them first. I usually develop the crush after we start talking, but then I'm always disapointed.

 

I'm not sure about what I'm gonna do. I'm just chill for now. I'm going to TRY to seperate from guys for awhile, but I doubt it'll happen. Thats just who I am. Its kind of like my smoking habit. I say I'm going to quit & days later a pick up a cigarette. Whatever

[LPHybridSnax]

i wont be with a chick that cheats, thats whats stopping me from going with a girl thats one of my best friends... that and the best friend thing.

[misspiggy]

youre like me. your more independent and need like spark and variety.