Foxx's Poetry Corner

[MrsBennington-Delson]

otay, good, now that i'm sure u dont hate me, i'll make it perfect!!!

ok lol thanx

[Ravynlee]

I know its been a while but just wanted to stop in and see what you been up to creatively...

Jeezy's request thing, cool. Very confronting though. Thats the point right? Each line is like a short sharp blow, if it were lyrically translated into physical gestures I'd liken them to jabs/short sharp quick punches. Its like a lyrical parlay, but then I have to say Fox that rather is your style isn't it? You dont overcrowd your sentences, you dont allow them to overflow, they are sharp and to the point. Very direct. Thats why I say confrontational even when the subject matter isn't. Anyway I liked it. Will be interesting to see what you come up with for Jos. Best of luck

 

~Rav

[Greyfoxx]

I know its been a while but just wanted to stop in and see what you been up to creatively...

Jeezy's request thing, cool. Very confronting though. Thats the point right? Each line is like a short sharp blow, if it were lyrically translated into physical gestures I'd liken them to jabs/short sharp quick punches. Its like a lyrical parlay, but then I have to say Fox that rather is your style isn't it? You dont overcrowd your sentences, you dont allow them to overflow, they are sharp and to the point. Very direct. Thats why I say confrontational even when the subject matter isn't. Anyway I liked it. Will be interesting to see what you come up with for Jos. Best of luck

 

~Rav

thankies mummy! I'm glad you posted!!!! I never noticed it till you said something, but i guess that is my style isn't it? Never crossed my mind. ^_^ But, i'm glad ya liked it nevertheless. Keep popping in here to see what i come up with next!!!

 

~~Foxxy Lady~~

[Greyfoxx]

Breathe In

 

 

Intro

Breathing so slowly

You never meant to go this way

I will not let you go

I will force you to breathe

 

Chorus

Breathe for me

Breathe to see the light

Breathe for me

Breathe and give a good fight

 

Verse One

You lay down before me

Your breaths are so shallow

Please Believe that

You will make it

All you have to do

Is breathe the dark away

And soon

You will fly

 

Chorus

 

Verse Two

Let go of the darkness

Breathe in the light

Let the light flow into

Your soul

Never again fear the night

Breathing strong now

Feeling your chest fill

With the fresh air

 

Chorus

 

Outro

Finally you see

How good it is

To Breathe…

Breathe for me…

Breathe for yourself…

 

[GraDoN]

awe thats one AWESOME song weeeeeeeeee i love it *sings it*

[Greyfoxx]

thanks GraDon. ^_^ I liked working on that song, it's fun for me to sing

[Peterdea]

i love it! sweet job there!!!

[Jeezy]

that's great...you are just an awesome writer

[MrsBennington-Delson]

omg!!! this is so awesome and touching!! grey you're the best!!

[Greyfoxx]

awwww thankies guys

 

i thought ppl might not like it, but i guess i was wrong

[Ravynlee]

It is an awesome song - I'm wondering to what music style that would go... hmmm...

But aside from that very visual, thats the first thing that caught me. That and the fact from like the second stanza or sth I went 'this sounds familiar to me' and I dont mean I've read it before, I meant the theme, it sounds like a familiar theme - I was thinkin Anne Rice, maybe I was wrong, but its def what I was seeing in my mind as I read the words...

Anyway, I take back what I said before, your previous post (song) was way more abrupt than this one, this one flowed it was almost... enticing, the exact opposite really - which means you Foxxy have the unique ability to blend styles to fit the theme. Everyone likes to think they can do it but you actually can and for that you must be commended. If I had read this and the last one and not known they were by the same person i wouldn't have guessed they were by the same person so there ya go - awesome work. I'd def like to hear this one set to a tune too... explore the whole world not just this one facet of it. Very intriguing

 

~Rav

[Friðbjörn]

woah...Breathe in is beautiful...

sounds like a desperate wish to breathe life into someone you love, it's moving to say the least

 

I'd love to see that interpreted with music...or has that already been done?

[Greyfoxx]

woah...Breathe in is beautiful...

sounds like a desperate wish to breathe life into someone you love, it's moving to say the least

 

I'd love to see that interpreted with music...or has that already been done?

 

I would love to put it to music, but yet i have no band so that is completely impossible.... :'( it'd be cool to do music with it,

 

thanks big bro, glad ya like it!!!!

[diana]

Sorry for the late comment...I didn't forget about it...

 

I like it...you really did a great job on that one...

I love that it's dark but kinda optimistic...I wouldn't be able to do that...to combine this...excellent...^^

[Greyfoxx]

thankies diana!!! yer so sweet *tackle hugs*

[Greyfoxx]

Soldiers coming from near and far

Working together to make a difference

Their efforts made clear

For the world to see

And yet we are still in

A land of confusion

 

 

 

People hating the government

Speaking ill of our leaders

Yet they do nothing to change the times

And to change their own ways

But they still criticize those in charge

Blaming them for their problems

Instead of stepping up

And taking responsibility

 

 

When I see all this hate

All this mistreatment

I begin to wonder why

I even try to do good for others

When the Good that I do

Is just overlooked

And the Bad and the evil is on the news

Yet they don’t recognize the few good people

So I wonder now,

How we can ever get better?

If we always focus on the negative.

Trying my best

Yet I can’t feel it in me

To try so hard to do good

And have it shoved aside

Like a piece of road kill

 

 

All these facts

All these truths

Begin to make me feel

That our once great world

Will never be the same

And its’ going to ruin itself

And we will never have the good

That we once had

So why? I ask

Why do they do these things?

Why do they insist on being evil?

When it’s so easy to be good!

Turning your backs against your own nations

Instead of helping the poor out

Instead of lending a helping hand

Or giving to a good cause

You spend your money on drugs and war

So tell me the sense in this

And I’ll show you

A land of confusion

 

 

 

 

 

[Friðbjörn]

woah good one...good message too

it's a bad bad world...

[Jeezy]

yeah great message...isn't there a song which is called "Land Of Confusion"

[Greyfoxx]

yeah great message...isn't there a song which is called "Land Of Confusion"

teehehehe, yea, i was listening to It and decieded it was a good line, so i used it ^_^

[Stenners]

Done well though a couple gripes when u say the world will never be the same U dont have that much to base it on....... in my eyes it hasnt changed that much since I was a kid other than its alot faster

[Jeezy]

teehehehe, yea, i was listening to It and decieded it was a good line, so i used it ^_^

yeah that's cool...and it's a nice song also

[Greyfoxx]

Done well though a couple gripes when u say the world will never be the same U dont have that much to base it on....... in my eyes it hasnt changed that much since I was a kid other than its alot faster

I do have much to base it on, see I, unlike you, have read LOADS of books. and the world has changed drasticlly. the people have changed, everything has changed. If you try to do something good in this world, most of the people shun you out, or push you aside. But, on the otherhand, if you do something bad or ill-mannered or something, you get on the night-time news.

tell me, is that how you want the world to be?

 

and Jeezy- Yeahh, thats a great song, it has tons of meaning. thats why i "borrowed" its 'land of Confusion"

[Stenners]

^^

 

Thats from the point of view of others though, no one can see true change other than yourself.

[By_My-elf]

Whoa you really otudone yourself I like this.

You never really see ppl talk bout these things.

I really dont have much to say I'm not really that well with comments -.-;

[diana]

I think this is...brilliant...

I love the theme...something new from you...you put it so good together...

I love that it's so realistic but yet...kinda dreamy...Idk...it is hiding some hope...and wishes...

It's good...and it's bad...it's pessimistic...

 

Wah, really awesome piece of art!