...I have clincal depression?

[Cloud]

I'm 15 and male. I get what your goin through, I've been through it before, not as major as you but I have. It isn't nice... But the things I have posted is how I overcame it and you should too...

I hope you get better man.

[Ravynlee]

I wasn't going to reply to this thread for several reasons but there's a few things here that need to be said, at the risk of sparking another heated exchange. Most of you who know me know my situation too, and though I am now far from the teenage years of angst and confusion/adjustment/finding my place in the world, the feelings you describe are universal and don't catagorically fit necessarily to that specific age bracket - if it did it would be considered more a 'phase' of development than an actual clinically diagnosed illness.

 

Since the age of 13 or thereabouts I have been on medication for depression. It's not a case of waking out of it, and anyone who's had depression knows its not as simple as having a few bad days that everyone else experiences then 'snaps out of.' How you view things certainly goes a long way towards self-help as medication will only do so much, but having supportive people around you is far more beneficial than people telling you, as was so elloquently said, to cheer up and smell the coffee or however that was put earlier. That really irritated me on a personal level I have to say.

But as if. Who chooses to live like that? Without hope, without reason, or a sense of purpose, to the point where food is tasteless, you dont even notice the passing days/years/seasons or care, you move and breathe and talk because you have to, because it's expected, but there's no point to it, nothing driving you, no reason to look forward or back or just be in the moment, there's nothing... it's a hollow, lonely, haunting existence.

 

And anyone at all who says they know what you're going through is a bare-faced liar. That's like saying 'I know how you feel' when a loved one dies. No one can ever KNOW how YOU feel, they can relate but they dont know as each life, each circumstance, each person are unique and their own.

Helping yourself out of depression is a very long arduous continous process and really if you dont find something to cling to to keep you focussed or going its painfully easy to do stupid things to make it worse. It pisses me to tears to hear people look at depression and its effects like its a choice not an affliction. Real depression is biochemically enduced. In my case as much circumstantial as it was medical. I have over the course of 15 years taken a whole heap of pills and sought councellors and therapists and specialists and hasd tests and so forth to correct the imbalances in my serotonin levels but in the end it wasn't so much medication that has brought me out of this latest phase of it, it was faced with my mother's mortality which gave me a sense of purpose. That's not to say I am free of the shackles of it, I dont think it will ever go. It always feels like a dark cloud hanging over my head where I cant see it but I know its there, and some days its thick enough to physically weigh me down but most of the time its just lingering. Like a threat. Maybe its to remind me of my lowest points so I dont ever go back. But how you see yourself and how you see the world and where you see yourself in it goes a HUGE way to working your way through the illness. And I say 'illness' not choice because that's what it is. Some people like to live melodramatic lives and some arent happy unless they are 'miserable' but if what you're going through doesnt feel normal to you and its not a conscious state you've talked yourself into then chances are you should seek help from whatever avenue seems approriate to you. Depression in its many forms is far more widely accepted now than it was ten years ago, twenty years ago. The way we live plays a huge part in the global epidemic. But think about it, if people thesedays actually stopped to help each other through difficult times (in an idealistic view of the world) rather than judge them maybe we really could cure it...

Nice idea right?

[Peterdea]

When i get depressed, i try to sleep it off. that works for me. And other times i just realize how fucking lucky i am compared to some people.

i think about how there are some people who are constantly alone, and yeah in some ways i am alone, but what friends i do have i feel lucky to have.

Occasionaly it does get realy bad but thats when i just spend a lot of time sleeping, reading and soing school work.

thats all i have to say

[Shadowed Heart]

Weird! I was diagnosed with that TODAY.

Says if I have three of more of those for 6+ weeks...

-Depressed mood, or Anhedonia

It is sufficient to have either of these symptoms in conjunction with five of a list of other symptoms over a two-week period. These include:

-Feelings of overwhelming sadness and/or fear, or the seeming inability to feel emotion (emptiness).

-A decrease in the amount of interest or pleasure in all, or almost all, daily activities.

-Changing appetite and marked weight gain or loss.

-Disturbed sleep patterns, such as insomnia, loss of REM sleep, or excessive sleep (Hypersomnia).

-Psychomotor agitation or retardation nearly every day.

-Fatigue, mental or physical, also loss of energy.

-Intense feelings of guilt, helplessness, hopelessness, worthlessness, isolation/loneliness and/or anxiety.

-Trouble concentrating, keeping focus or making decisions or a generalized slowing and obtunding of cognition, including memory.

-Recurrent thoughts of death (not just fear of dying), desire to just "lie down and die" or "stop breathing", recurrent suicidal ideation without a specific plan, or a suicide attempt or a specific plan for committing suicide.

-Feeling and/or fear of being abandoned by those close to one.

 

Meh... I underlined the ones I've had for 6 or more weeks. Blahhhh

[lstic]

Well...i feel most of those things also, but i just don't worry about it... And one advice...Let the psychologist or any person beginning with psycho be your last option.... The last thing you need is a help from a person who's mentally f***d up like every official psycho doctor...

The best help would be your friends...find one you can trust and i'm sure you'll be satisfied with non professional treatment.

And after all...you always have LPF's dark room...you can already see how many people tries to help you.

[diana]

The last thing you need is a help from a person who's mentally f***d up like every official psycho doctor...

Okay...I'm sorry you think this way...but I'm offended...

[mrsrobourdon]

Well...i feel most of those things also, but i just don't worry about it... And one advice...Let the psychologist or any person beginning with psycho be your last option.... The last thing you need is a help from a person who's mentally f***d up like every official psycho doctor...

The best help would be your friends...find one you can trust and i'm sure you'll be satisfied with non professional treatment.

And after all...you always have LPF's dark room...you can already see how many people tries to help you.

 

i wonder why your saying that, because my major is psychology and i am going to be a psychologist whether im mental or not. im thinking you had bad terrible experience from past psychologists?

i dont know, but not all psychologist are the same, so i going to go with diana IM OFFENDED AS WELL!

 

we arent psycho or f***d up. we examine human behavior and see whether or not drugs should be involved to help treat the patient...u can call it helping people out.

 

i dont know whats f***d up about that. >:o

[lstic]

Well...i apologize to you guys, but that's my personal opinion...

[PTeddy]

I hate to say this, but you're 15. Almost everyone 15 year old feels like that, but they get over it with time. Look after yourself and find a way to get your feelings out. Giving yourself the idea that something is 'wrong' with you though, isn't going to help.