Letting him go, advice please

[Greyfoxx]

Hey everyone. I need some advice.

 

Okay. Ya'll know i've been going out with andy for over two years. But the past few months i've had the thought of leaving him in my head. He is a jerk a lot of the time and he just makes me feel bad, among other reasons. Yesterday, i decided enough was enough and i brought it up. He started bawling his eyes out and clinging on to me, begging me not to leave, and begging me not to leave him alone. I called my mum and told her to come get me. He spazed even more. He was a complete wreck. Before i left, i caved in and told him i'd stay but i cant stay forever.....even though thats not what i want.

 

I know i want to leave him but i can't make him go through that......

 

Guys, gals, any advice would be very much helpful.

[Friðbjörn]

if he can't not be an ass, he doesn't deserve you.

 

if you're only staying with him not to make him go through the pain of it then it's pointless.

 

my opinion...

[Black_Angel]

Youll have to do it, just try to reassure him a bit, tell him that you'll still be friends and you still want to know him. It'll be for the best in the long run. Sorry I can't be of more help I'm totally useless in situations like yours.

[diana]

if he can't not be an ass, he doesn't deserve you.

 

if you're only staying with him not to make him go through the pain of it then it's pointless.

 

my opinion...

I support this...

 

Hmmm...do you still love him?

 

It would be good that you face him with his behaviour you don't like (if you haven't already) and talk about it...But if you really want you 2 to part then you should leave him even though he feels awful about it...I mean, what's enough is enough...You can't always go back to him just cuz of him...you have to think about yourself, your future and your happiness...

 

I don't know what else to say...hope you'll do what you think it's best for you and that it'll turn out okay...*hugs*

[Yackiestinger]

Dump him immediately

[Stenners]

U cant stay in a flase relationship, it isn't fair on either of u

 

feel better x

[Greyfoxx]

thanks ya'll.....it helps and dosnt help at the same time.

[Breakdown Conspiracy]

thanks ya'll.....it helps and dosnt help at the same time.

 

Hmm he sounds rather weak and abit of a jerk, either hes dosnt have much self-confidence or something.. Also if you want a break theres no harm in asking for one.

[Greyfoxx]

good point. I know i should be doing what is best for me and such, but i dont think i can live with myself if i know I made him hurt so much.....

[By_My-elf]

It's natural for him to feel like that after 2 years,

But if you want to leave him cause of the way he's acting just go for it.

 

you can't stay with him through guilt and such not gonna work and he'll be the one dumping you on the spot later on.

 

I'm not that goo dat this area of things, can't rly say much I only observe other relations. (friends,fam,etc)

[XrockinfreakX]

If he hasnt been a jerk all along maybe he thinks that he can be one and that you wont leave him for it.

 

You should leave him though, in the long run you might be glad you did.

[Jeezy]

You should really think about yourself in this situation...

 

I know that you don't wanna hurt him and stuff...

 

but in the end your feelings are more important.

 

If you just stay with him to not hurt him....you hurt yourself.

 

and it's a waste of your time

[GraDoN]

ya i agree with jeezy

if he wants to be a jerk and doesent treat you with the respect you need and deserve give him the finger

[Greyfoxx]

Ya'll make good points....i should end it. But how?

[By_My-elf]

Just let'em know that it's over,

and if he tries to spaz out leave before he get's to you.

 

He'll try to make you pity him or some other way and he'll try to make you feel bad

to stay with you...either that or he just does care for you, but if you feel nothing their just

break it off on the spot. and walk away be a friend after it all cools off if he's up for it.

[Breakdown Conspiracy]

Ya'll make good points....i should end it. But how?

Well assuming you can both be mature about it, sit down with him and say what you feel, why he makes u want to leave. Tell him the things he does that push you away, and explain that you want a break. If you take it slowly it should be easier, instead of quickly dumping him, to be left in a emotional puddle.:no:

[untitled]

Ya'll make good points....i should end it. But how?

just be honest, tell him how you feel and why you want to end it, try to do it in person though and not by phone or so

[Greyfoxx]

I dont think i can do it in person, cause i know he'd start crying like crazy agian and i dont think i can handle that while trying to break up with him.

[allieking]

you can't stay with someone out of guilt hun, it will make you hate them. sit him down and tell him that you don't love him anymore and that you think you should split up, if he reacts the same way again ask him if he really wants you to stay with him because you feel sorry for him. i'm sure he will agree with you then and if he doesn't hes mad!!!!

 

its sad when people split after so long but he has to see that its unfair to keep you with him just for his selfish needs. you guys can still be friends if thats what he wants.