MS - Rav's newest story

[crazy robster]

Awesome update my sweet! I still think there's too much drama concerning your character though...definitely not the Greek way of thinking!! LOL But then again if you didn't have Ravyn act like that and think like that then it would be me writing and not you right? And I can tell you I couldn't assume the burden of writing a colossal piece like this on my shoulders! I'm a noob when it comes to these things lol The latest updates are full of action!! Chester is out, Mike's freaked out and organising his next move... Makes one hold their breath really! Oh and since you appreciate suggestions my sweet.... I suggest you do me the honour of coming on MSN cause I have missed talking to you!! *hugs*

[woodyloveslinkin]

I thought they had found Ava and she was in the police car...??

Curse these eyes!

This is what doing a 1700 word essay at the last minute does to your eyes...grr...

[Pheonix791989]

good updates mum. i got exams coming up next week so I got to get ready for them.... i hate schooling like that....when everything rides on a stupid test and nothing else. its a nice break from everything to read the updates. *pokes fribby* eh what can you do? especailly now a days when a HS diploma is like nothing now that they hand them out left and right... update soon mum

[Ravynlee]

Well good luck with them! All the best, Mel, you're smart, I know you'll do well

And don't be so sure on the certificates, I never got mine. Dropped out half way through year 11. Never finished any education I start, so let's hope you'll do better than me in that regards!

Again, best of luck.

And thanks. More soon.

[Ravynlee]

Hello.

Small update today.

Have been consciously trying to get back to everyone's POV (every character) and try and spread it out evenly in order to keep this ball rolling. So far so good. Here's what I wrote last night. More later.

 

---

 

The humidity of the day brought a storm on its heels that following night.

Staring out across the rain-slicked street Fox grimaced. She was saturated to the bone and her teeth were gnashed to keep them from chattering. Above her the sky rumbled like the voice of an angry god. Lightening cracked as the rain continued in a loud tireless applause. Watching the street flash pink and white Fox braced herself for the sudden boom and barely flinched when it came. With her eyes peeled ahead Fox was too distracted to care about the elements raging on around her. Ever since she had heard the news her world had gone into a tailspin. The illusion that Chester would rush out as a free liberated man straight from jail and into her welcoming arms hadn’t happened the way she had often envisioned it. In fact though Chester had been out now for almost 24 hours she still was yet to lay eyes on or hear a single word from him. It was as if her former lover had simply vanished into thin air upon release but deep down Fox knew there was more to it than that. In the last few months she could guiltily recount the amount of times she had gone out of her way to see him on one hand, and the last one had been more weeks ago than she dared admit to herself. She had failed him and now when it mattered the most he seemed to have returned the favour in kind. It was a bitter pill for Fox to swallow considering she had all but taken Chester’s name in his absence and was now on the outer with the only man she had once vowed to lay down her life for.

Watching the alley and the city street light up quickly, Fox squared her shoulders and hung her head a little, scowling at the sidewalk in a weak attempt at deflecting the blame. As always of late her thoughts quickly turned to David. The stocky bald-headed pierced and softly spoken man had been her rock in Chester’s absence and they had always been close friends, the three of them, both she and Dave willing aides to Chester’s empire ready to stand up at a moments notice and do whatever it took to maintain the status quo the criminal entrepreneur had set in place. But those carefree days were long behind her and in recent years and months Fox had felt her tentative grasp on life in general slipping precariously through her fingers without Chester there to guide her. Dave had been only too willing to step up and be the post to her mast, be her underling as she had been Chester’s, but something in his eyes always belied his hunger for something more than she could give him. And now in his good friend’s absence Dave had anchored himself and had no intentions of going anywhere. As far as he was concerned ‘this’ was just business and had nothing to do with friendship or loyalty, he repeatedly told her. Something about his attitude made the blood inside Fox’s veins run cold the more she thought about it. Though she had started out virtually falling into Chester’s shoes once Chester was dragged away, and had done her best to keep what little there was left of his entourage; she too had been swept up by it, the parties, the back-alley treaties, the unspoken threats and petty acts she had both organised and been party to had left their indelible mark on her. Fox was not that same naïve woman who looked at her boyfriend with rose-coloured glasses, no, she had long since stripped him down from that pedestal she had once held him in such high esteem upon. The truth was now after two years Fox didn’t feel inferior to him, she felt equal, more than equal, and what was worse was that with Chester’s disappearance and Dave’s well timed and well crafted pearls of wisdom in her ear Fox was almost certain Chester himself had to know it. After all the rest of New York seemed to cower beneath her shadow like a badly whipped dog just watching and waiting for when she would show up and strike next. But Chester had never taken kindly to competition, it had been his biggest downfall with that two-faced schmuck Shinoda, who himself was no different. No, to Chester’s way of thinking, Fox was certain, that he was looking at her now like an enemy and a rival, and the only way he was coming back to her was if she gave up her throne and all the associated power she had come to accumulate with it and step back into the shadows where she used to be. The only thing was Fox couldn’t wholeheartedly convince herself that any of that wasn’t true and the guilt did burden her, but not to the point of action. Dave had filled her head with visions of the two of them taking over this city, just the two of them he smiled, and as fanciful as that dream seemed it was alluring. Besides, he told her often that he loved her and would take care of her and unlike Chester he had so far lived up to his word. And so he should have. But it was a declaration she had not, and would not hear from Chester now for a very long time, not now she had been replaced by a five year old girl.

“Ava,” Fox scowled and spat at the sidewalk. “Bitch.”

When she had heard rumours that the illegitimate little bastard had been snatched from her mother for the most part Fox had been glad to hear it. She hoped that someone else got to that kid before Chester did and did to her what the little bitch so badly deserved. The idea that Chester could keep a secret that big from her all these years made her decisions all the more easier to live with. She still loved him with all of her heart and probably always would, but she wasn’t so gullible as to believe he would commit himself to her now so completely, not when he had a frigging kid and some well-to-do-bitch he had knocked up all those years back to settle down and live happily ever after with. No, Greyfoxx did not cope well with competition either. If it wasn’t for the fact that the kid’s mother was already locked up for her own protection and the kid was already missing somewhere in this rat-infested city then Fox would have gladly taken it upon herself to extricate the both of them from both her and Chester’s lives altogether. Shame really some loose cannon had already beaten her to it, but no matter. At least it bought her some time, she snorted decisively.

Staring down at a crumpled newspaper floating in a puddle on the sidewalk Fox strolled over to it and frowned down with her slitted green eyes. The grinning visage of Mike Shinoda assailed her eyes from beneath the water like a visual mockery. Fox’s sneer only intensified as she recalled word of his proposed TV interview coming up a handful of days away. With a grunt she cursed under her breath. Then, with the toe of her boot, she kicked the paper across the cement and into the gutter with a noisy wet splat. At that her smile slowly grew. Reaching into her coat she traced the pistol’s handle with gentle reverence.

Three days, she mused to herself. Three days and then the world would be free of him. She may not have Chester back but if nothing else she would liberate this city of the one man who cast a bigger shadow over it than she or her former boyfriend ever did. Three days and Mike Shinoda would be a memory just like his moronic brother. Still smiling to herself Fox raised her face and turned her malicious joy skyward. She seemed to be daring the heavens to smite her murderous intent with lightening and hail but if God was paying attention he obviously didn’t give a shit either way. No one could hear the sound of her laughter over the rumbling thunder. Aside from the cabs sweeping past ambivalently no one was around to notice her at all.

 

---

 

Poor Mikey... everyone's out to get him... Well I guess the more famous you get the bigger target you ultimately become :lol:

[Ravynlee]

---

 

The irony of treatment was the fact they gave her drugs to help wean her off the other drugs that had supposedly brought her to this stage in her life.

Sitting alone in the therapists office Ravyn stared at her interlocked fingers counting the seconds clack by on the obligatory clock until she lost count of them. In front of her a small fish tank sat on a small wooden shelf. The fish inside it were peaceful and relaxing, the sound of bubbles meant to unwind her, locked as she was inside those four sterile white walls. Struggling her eyes up she watched the therapist scribble a few more sentences on the clip board before she cleared her throat and shuffled closer, reminding him that he wasn’t alone in the room, regardless the way he was making her feel with his professional lapse into silence.

“So, what are you hoping to get out of this experience?” he asked her, his grey eyes peering over the lenses of his horn rimmed glasses haughtily.

Ravyn shrugged. The fish were terribly distracting, so too were her thoughts racing ahead too fast for her mouth to formulate coherent sentences from it. She shrugged and smiled meekly hoping to come off acquiescent. The therapist just looked at her. Seeking shelter towards the carpet she confessed exactly what she knew a trained counselor wanted to hear. She might have been a few days without her meds but she was far from stupid. Aside from her nausea and dizziness she felt fine, not counting her emotions surging like a river of hot lava bubbling away just below the surface. It took incredible willpower just to sit there still and smiling agreeably when inside she felt a hairs breadth from snatching that pen from his hand and stabbing him in the neck with it. Thinking of that she let out a tiny smile. It would be all too easy she thought to pretend to be crazy in a house full of crazy people and slowly lose herself amongst it.

They had started her immediately on group therapy, and along with the initial weening process rehab at least so far felt like nothing more than extended stay at a hospice. It certainly hadn’t played out like she had seen on TV with orderlies pinning her down and bashing her with nightsticks in order to get her to take her daily medication. Save for the fact she spent her nights locked alone in a cramped soulless room like some common criminal things were arguably normal. But nothing ate away at her so much as her lack of general freedom. She was a prisoner as she had been back at that holding cell and what was worse someone she cared about and trusted had put her here in the first place. She had listened when the doctors explained Joanna’s reasoning to her and she had even nodded agreeably but inside she could feel her anger and frustration building inside of her like a scream waiting to fly out and deafen someone with the sheer force of it.

Since she was new they wasted no time in introducing her to the rest of the inmates, and predictably Ravyn found herself in a room full of strangers outlining her life story to empathetic faces who were as much a captive audience just as she was. Though the nurses and counselors all praised her apparent bravery afterwards Ravyn sunk down into her seat feeling even more burdened by her confessions than she thought was natural. Feeling eyes on her she blinked up to see a young man staring back from his plastic seat across from her. The participants were all set out in a circle. There were roughly ten others including the councilor. It was with some trepidation when they were instructed to pair up and found the man across from her smiling back somewhat coyly. Ravyn rolled her eyes. The last thing she wanted in this chapter of her life was to be hit on by a recovering drug addict with about as much to live for as she had. While it may have been the kind of ‘eyes met across the room’ bullshit her sister may have endorsed Ravyn was not taken by it. As the class was made to stand and interact with their new ‘team mate’ Ravyn huffed at the floor and waited for the man to approach her. He wasn’t tall or solid or exuding confidence as he made his way over and tentatively settled down beside her. Seeing him shift about in his seat did little to comfort her as she leant forward over her lap and gave the stranger a cursory glimpse over her shoulder. His hair was scruffy, a dirty brown blonde, his face squarish, and his eyes were a vibrant bright blue. Ravyn was not attracted to blue eyes, she preferred them dark, the darker the better, or deep like Rob’s had been. He looked young, younger than her, but the shadow of stubble threw her calculations out the window making him look like a poster boy for a Calvin Klein billboard or some such. She nodded at him as he nodded hello. Then he grinned and raised his hand towards her.

“Sorry, I forgot your name.”

“Ravyn.”

“Uh, that’s right. Nice to meet you.”

“Yeah. You too,” she struggled out as the two of them shook hands. “And you?”

“Nick,” he said. “Nick Stahl.”

“Nick?” Ravyn repeated. It wasn’t easy to do. Saying it was like switching on a light bulb in her attic full of memories. The handshake lasted a few seconds longer than she normally would have allowed in general contact. In his strange way Nick was smiling at her.

“What?” he asked, seeming oddly coy for first introductions. But Ravyn at first couldn’t answer. In her mind, with her heart tight and her pulse racing, it was like something inside of her had just fallen into place, something made sense even if the rest of her didn’t know what it was to quite comprehend what it was. As the rest of the room droned with the sound of others making idle conversation around them Ravyn dipped her eyes to her lap struggling to speak with her mouth suddenly dry and her voice heavy and raspy.

“Do you believe in fate, Nick?” she asked him. She braved a lingering glimpse up into his bright blue eyes.

Nick grinned at her.

“Maybe,” he said.

Sliding her hand free Ravyn slowly, secretively, smiled back at him.

“Nick,” she repeated again. Her smile grew. Suddenly she felt more at ease with the place. It was as if her son, if only in name, had come back to her once more. Calmness settled like a blanket over her. For the first time since arriving she began to feel as if she were exactly where she belonged.

 

---

 

Awwww

[woodyloveslinkin]

Schmuck....

ROFL ! I love it when people use that word. My friend is looking at me pissing myself laughing and thinking "wtf?"

Wait...who's Nick Stahl..is it just a character's name or an a direct allusion to a real life character (like Tarja off DS is Tarja Turunen off old Nightwish)?

Good work! Can't wait for more!

[Ravynlee]

Real guy. Not hard on the eyes either. He ain't no Rob of course but hey, he'll do. (And for the purpose of the story works very well of course, Nick and Nicky, awwness).

Schmuck. Yeah. That's what I get for watching Billy Crystal on The Late Show last night... funny stuff.

And thanks. Glad you liked.

[Pheonix791989]

come on billy idol is better.... JK i love billy idol though. its all good.. n_n but here in america mum they have this thing called "No Child Left Behind" where if anyone fails no one passes. i swear "President" Bush is dumber then a box of rocks and I'm normally just right under him... waiting for him to have an epicaly legendary failure so I can point and laugh at him, his failure and his stupid ears. sorry if I ended up hijacking the thread for a semi-rant. I had to do a research paper on the whole "No Child Left Behind" act. in my opnion one of the stupider things that that president has done, even if the war in iraq was worse. but great updates mum you gotta keep going. summer break is coming up soon and I'll be out in about 2 weeks so yeah. pwease?

[Friðbjörn]

nick stahl huh? terminator much?

haha

 

gotta love this story

really brooding atmospheres...

and the nice thing of introducing characters that are real life people that we perhaps know a little, makes it all easier to comprehend and keep track of, very good

[Ravynlee]

Thanks guys. And shit yeah, Fribs Haha. Why not I say?

Mel, that's a hell of a rant. Awesome stuff! You're putting my previous ranting ways to shame. Oh well, had to pass on the torch eventually yeah? Best of luck with it all and yay for upcoming break. Wish I could join ya. But I will do my best to update again soon. Have nothing yet, literally, but will work on that. Try my best to distract you for a few mins a day anyway.

Thanks again. More soon.

~Rav

[Ravynlee]

Productive day. Wrote about 11 pages. Haven't proof read one of them, am leaving that to you to sort out. Too much for me to go over just now Sue me, I'm lazy.

 

On with the show.

 

---

 

“I still can’t believe you’re going through with it,” Mel muttered.

Flipping through the pages of a magazine opened across her thigh Mel scowled a little as she blinked up. Across the room Mike settled back into his chair with a sigh. He shrugged.

“I kind of had to. I was backed into a corner. If I stayed here saying nothing then the press would have a field day. I’m not looking forward to it, believe me,” he said, and sighed again.

Meeting her eyes across his over sized desk Mike smiled ruefully. Mel matched it. He watched her sit up and with a squeak of leather pushed herself up onto her feet. The magazine bearing the image of his face hit the coffee table with a swish and clatter.

“I wasn’t talking about the interview,” she said eventually.

Mike’s smile dwindled.

In a few steps Mel made her way across the few feet that separated them and perched herself up on the edge of his desk. With all the vacant chairs that littered the room it was as much an act of defiance as it was a literal statement that he couldn’t distance himself from. Folding her arms across her chest she continued to watch him, never quite directly, never seeming completely at ease at being confrontational with her employer. With anyone else she could size up in a heartbeat but she looked at Mike now as she always tried to be, something of his reluctant yet appreciative confidante. As the never-ending silence continued on rarely unabated around them Mel watched his eyes sink and wander introspectively upon his chest.

“I know it’s not my place to ask, but I just… why are you letting her go through with it?” she wondered.

It was a rare moment for them to be left alone like this where he wasn’t distracted taking phone calls or making them, or being harassed by one person or another, all who couldn’t seem to function their normal day-to-day lives without the omnipotent Mike Shinoda telling them what to do or be a part of. And to that she had to find a fleeting moment where she could read his moods well enough to know anything she had to say to him wouldn’t be misconstrued, be put aside or ignored in the general chaos of his busy schedule, leaving little if any time left to waste on building up a gentle approach. She watched him closely for those passing moments as he sat forward in his seat and rubbed at his face and beard before his shoulders rose and fell with heavy consternation.

“I don’t know,” he said at last.

When he met her eyes he seemed to pout in place of smiling bravely. Mel smiled back for him. In moments like these in his vulnerability and humanity it disarmed her how alluring he really was, and she quickly had to look away. Mike seemed to be considering his answers very carefully. Aside to the window he reasoned, “You know things have just been so busy lately… and I guess part of me was just hoping it would go away and would take care of itself, but it hasn’t.”

“No, it hasn’t,” Mel agreed.

“You know,” Mike smiled, folding his arms across the desk casually. “I don’t get you sometimes. I know you’re a mercenary, I know you make a living… doing what you do, but… if I didn’t know any better I’d swear you were like… What happened to you? I mean, where’s your motherly instincts? You’re a woman. Don’t you ever want to have kids of your own one day?”

Mel balked and shook her head. She immediately regretted it, feeling the lie simmering away in her stomach like a tumor. She quashed her nervousness with a strange smile she hoped was coming off menacing. She almost laughed to herself. The notion that someone like her could just stop shooting and beating and killing on demand and appreciate life in all its frailty almost smacked of hypocrisy. To Mike’s somewhat amused chuckle Mel could only lower her eyes again and let them trail distantly away outside the panoramic windows. Slumping backward into his seat Mike groaned.

“Look, don’t get me wrong, I love her, I do,” he said of his wife. “I just… I’m not ready. And I can’t talk to her at all. It’s like ever since we moved into the city she’s become this whole new person. She’s like a loyal pet dog you know, always wanting me to take her somewhere, do something, always wanting to be right beside me or know where I am or who I’m with like 24 hours a day. I can’t live like that, I need room to breathe, to- to do my own thing, you know? And if I don’t give her enough attention she feels ignored, if I let her do what she wants I feel smothered. Bringing a kid into this shit is just…”

“Counterproductive?”

“I was going to say wrong,” Mike corrected with a glance before shrugging again in dismissal. “Maybe one day, yeah, sure. Hell I’m even looking forward to it, but not now… not right now. There’s still too much to do, too much at stake. And now with Chester out there… God, I still can’t believe he had a kid this whole time and no one, not even he knew about it… Apparently. Perfect example of what I’ve talking about. Call me paranoid or whatever but what’s to stop that exact same thing happening to Rashell and… and… my family what happened to his? You see, this is the shit I’ve been going on about for months now and nobody was listening. Oh yeah they’re all up paying attention now, now that it’s too late and that kid is fucking missing and god knows where and in what state – she’s probably lying a gutter somewhere with her throat cut, and I’m supposed to be thrilled to be bringing another one into this fucking shit? Are you fucking shitting me?”

For a few moments the silence settled into its usual proportions underpinned by the sound of traffic droning below and the seconds on the clock counting down like some mechanical heartbeat. Getting to his feet Mike strolled away from his desk and the window and made his way over to another section of his office to open a drawer and rifle through the papers inside with a brooding frown.

[Ravynlee]

“So,” Mel said, “What are we going to do?”

Mike’s ensuing silence made her defenses rise and her heart race a little faster in guilt as she slid herself off the edge of the desk to approach him. Stopping within arms reach she looked over his shoulder catching glimpses of the clippings, the folders and surveillance pictures that choked the drawer before he stopped, opened a folder and acknowledged it with a satisfied grunt.

“We,” he muttered almost under his breath, “are not going to do anything. We’re sticking to the plan.”

“But I thought it’s too late for an abortion?”

Frowning at her over his shoulder Mike ordered her silence before he slid the drawer shut with a cushioned thump.

“It is. But that was never part of it anyway. Trying to get Rashell to terminate would have been like trawling the entire Mississippi for Bourdon’s supposed body, downright fucking impossible. Besides, I need her to trust me. If she thought for a second I had any hand in this, she’d…” Mike stopped. Clearing his throat he wandered across the office again to sink down on the sofa now where Mel had been previously laying. As the springs groaned he laid the folder on the coffee table and spread out its contents beneath Mel’s cautious gaze.

“What’s that?”

“This is what I’ve spent the last two years working my ass off to get.”

“What, you mean Chester?”

Mike looked up and met her eyes seriously. He smiled but it was slow, full of teeth and came off practically malevolent in the way it caused the shadows to dance across his face.

“Better.”

“We don’t even know where he is. I thought the whole idea was to get him to-?”

As she made her way across the room towards him Mike cut her off and asked like a teacher, “You know what motivates anyone more than anything else on the planet?”

Mel shrugged vaguely. “Money?”

“Fear,” he corrected. “If we can somehow find out where that kid is we can draw him out, straight out into the open where we want him. If he thought for a second she was in trouble he’d come out from under his rock and face me.”

“That’s assuming he even gives a shit about this kid anyway. Just because she’s his doesn’t mean he cares?” Mel offered.

Mike nodded agreeably.

“True. But unlike the rest of this city I actually know this man. Or at least I did. I know his type. And he’s spent the last two years or so living behind bars, whatever form, cut off from everyone else around him. The man needs a friend. He needs a purpose. He’ll be looking for anything to prove to the world that oh yes he’s done his time and now he’s a changed man. Fuck that. He murdered my brother and he knows it. If he thinks even for a second I had access to his little girl he’d be here in a heartbeat trying to get her back.”

“But – I don’t understand, how-?”

“I know where her mother is. She’s already been questioned. I have the transcripts right here,” he said lifting a small sheaf of stapled papers pointedly. “It was her brother that took it, some dumb-ass punk kid by the name of Stenners. Goren’s men are already out there scouring the streets where this kid is known to frequent. It’s only a matter of time til we do find her and I have the New York police department on my side. What does Chester have? He’s one person out there on his own. The odds are stacked against him. But I don’t care. Even in the unlikely event he gets to her before we do I have something else up my sleeve to get at him with; it involves his old lady love.”

“Who, Greyfoxx?”

“Bingo.”

Inviting her to settle down beside him Mike showed her the papers spread out before him that were a comprehensive mixture of police reports, surveillance photos, notes and such from a number of different sources. The scowling black and white visage of Chester’s old girlfriend staring off ambivalently as she exited some club made Mel frown in consternation. Remembering back to the day they had first met back at Fort Minor Mel swallowed loudly, sighed, and sunk back on her seat a little to distance herself from it. It felt like a lifetime ago. Beside her Mike was still sorting through them with the casual abandon of someone flipping through a treasured family album. In many respects Mel assumed to Mike it was. This was the album he had left to create with bitterness and hatred in place of his slain sibling. Mel listened as Mike explained in fleeting detail the plan he had woven to draw Greyfoxx out in much the same way he was planning with Chester. It was in many ways like listening to an artist explain the science of his craft to someone who had no idea what any of the terms or explanations literally meant. Hearing the name Jos Mel froze and glimpsed back at him with her eyes narrowed in recognition. There was only one Jos she knew of, another student back at Brown like she had been, and picturing her face Mel felt her insides sink with sickening clarity. The face back at Mike’s house the other day, of course, she knew her, she just hadn’t known how. In a city this big she saw familiar faces all the time, still… But Mike was speaking to her again. She missed some of what he had already said. Repeating the name she stalled him mid-sentence.

“What does she have to do with any of this?”

“She’s a friend of mine. Just like a lot of people are. Just like you are,” he said. And in that one simple statement Mel felt her insides run cold. Somehow instinctively she knew without having to be told that her college associate had been drawn into this web just the same way she had and was now a helpless fly trapped inside it. Though Mel smiled on the outside on the inside she was cringing. Though she really didn’t know Jos that well at all, the fact she knew her even a little somehow seemed to make this development more personal. The life she had lived prior to Mike, that she had been able up to this point to block out so successfully, was clawing away at her consciousness trying to get back in again. All of a sudden Mel felt like he had stripped away her apathetic façade and had left her sitting there bleeding and vulnerable as she had figuratively been that day on the quad bench back on campus all those months ago.

“There’s no need to be jealous, she just works for me. She takes care of Rashell when I’m not around. She’s… the nanny we hired.”

Nanny? For the kid he was trying to get rid of? Mel stared back at him lost in his direct stare saying nothing.

“I told you, we’re sticking to the plan. All I need to do now is make it happen. When the time is right the world will mourn for my loss like it should have for Jason, and I’ll make sure that bitch Greyfoxx is implicated somehow. If I can’t make Chester pay for what he did in the past I’ll make sure as hell he suffers for it in the future. If he thinks for a second he’s going to live the rest of his life as a free man I’ll personally see to it his future isn’t one worth living, by taking away everything that son of a bitch holds dear – starting with his precious girlfriend. We’ll take it from there.”

“And the kid?”

“We’ll see.”

[Ravynlee]

Mel sat in a kind of stupefied silence listening to Mike rationalise his reasons for going public with his upcoming interview. The fact he was going on TV and to print for hundreds of thousands of dollars and literal fans had little if anything to do with it: to Mike’s way of thinking it the perfect platform for setting his personal little agenda in motion. He was counting on the spotlight now when it suited him; he was actually going to drum up some good publicity for his cause, because when his unborn child was disposed of, somehow in another one of his signature ‘accidents’ the city if not the country was going to rise up in sympathy with him – and how easily a city full of outraged citizens would be to manipulate against a solitary ex-con like Bennington – or one of Bennington’s known associates. It would be like pointing a loaded missile at a helpless fly. Whether lost in the force of her past memories, both good and bad, or struggling to come to terms with what lay ahead Mel sat there silent as Mike reached out and squeezed her hand. She saw him smile in gratitude and tried to reflect it all the while feeling the silence and monumentality of the moment bearing down upon her like a physical force. Then tentatively he leant closer and pressed his mouth against hers. Frozen in shock Mel couldn’t even think let alone react. The kiss was brief but overwhelming. A second later after he lingered studying her face, Mike pulled back and eventually walked away from her. Gingerly Mel licked at her bottom lip to test if she could taste him there or if it really had been a terrible trick of her emotions. Sinking her teeth into her lip she swallowed a stone. Watching Mike resume his usual business on the computer screen once more behind his desk Mel couldn’t help but feel like something had drastically changed in her reality. Unable to tell whether he was now ignoring her or was concentrating all his attentions on the work at hand Mel got up on unsteady legs and excused herself from his office. He bid her goodbye but with her pulse pounding in her ears Mel hardly heard it. For a woman that made a living killing drug dealers and generally anyone Mike told her to, the fact she stood out in the corridor feeling like the frightened teenager she physically resembled was almost laughable. But no one, especially Melissa, was laughing. Something about his kiss, not his words resonated within her like a parting farewell. For the first time since meeting him, since he had set himself up like an untouchable presence in her life, Mel began to truly fear that her days at Mike’s side were somehow inexplicably numbered.

 

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[Ravynlee]

---

 

“Oh Joel, they’re gorgeous,” Joanna grinned.

Gripping the bunch of bright mixed flowers tightly in her hand Joanna met him in a one armed hug and kissed his cheek then his lips in a long thankful kiss before she slipped back again. They were walking side by side along the footpath and for the first time in what felt like ages Joanna was really beginning to warm to her new life. The sun was shining down through gaps in the trees and the sky above was still a faultless blue. In her stroller Haily was pulling faces as she concentrated hard on her pacifier and was content to be pushed along without making so much as a sound beyond a series of low grunting noises. Beside her Joel grinned back happily. He didn’t have an explanation for buying them nor a defense and shrugged back feigning innocence when Joanna told him he shouldn’t have done so. The sound of her voice however pitched in adoration clearly suggested otherwise.

It had been a few days now and spring was finally starting to settle properly in New York City. Though the mornings were still a little misty by mid afternoon the sun was out and radiating its superlative glow over the city and its grateful inhabitants. Joanna had been more than happy when Joel had taken her and Haily out for lunch and they had spent a good hour or two just roaming the streets, wandering in and out of stores and generally just basking in one another’s company. Central Park was a favorite spot for the love struck couple with its many rollerbladers and cyclists and joggers, and others laying in the sun reading books or generally strolling the rolling green lawns hand-in-hand as Joanna and Joel now were.

It was the evening of the most anticipated interview New York had seen in a while and there was a general buzz about the city. Even wandering along with Joel occasionally breathing in the aromas of her flowers and blushing out at the people that passed them Joanna could not escape the sight of Mike’s face staring back at her from every newspaper cover and magazine in proximity. Haunted by the visions of her sister laying there in her hospital bed fighting for life and hearing Mike’s voice recount his innocence in her memories Joanna’s smile fell off her face and was picked up again by the deft touch of Joel’s hand as it gently tugged at her waistline.

“What are you thinking about?” he asked her.

He looked a sight in his tee shirt and baggy black pants and pumps with his tattoos spilling down his arms, and Joanna felt a tiny rebellious thrill at the looks some people gave the mismatched couple, but looking down at the face of Jesus on his forearm Joanna couldn’t summon the will to lie to him.

“Everything,” she generalized. “My sister. Mike… Rob,” she sighed.

Beside her Joel nodded. Glimpsing aside to gauge his reaction, Joanna leant her head briefly against his side reassuringly. Through dark glasses Joel’s eyes were trained upon her. He smiled.

“You still miss him, huh?”

“Of course. He was my husband. He’s Haily’s father. Regardless what he was like before he… went away, I’ll always miss him. I just feel bad sometimes, you know?”

Joel nodded and tightened his grip around her.

“It’s natural,” he told her. He nuzzled a kiss into her crown with a murmur.

Across the reservoir a faint breeze picked up whisking cool air into their smiling faces. Stopping at the railing Joanna sighed and cast an eye out, looking at the way the skyscrapers seemed to be painted atop the gently lapping waters like a work of art come to life. Staring down at her reflection and the murky depths beneath her smile once more dwindled dismally from her face.

“Hey,” Joel urged. Joanna blinked up. “You know you don’t have to feel like you have to keep it from me, you know. Bourdie may have had his troubles but he was still a good guy from what I knew of him. I’m sure he wouldn’t have wanted to see you mourning him like this. He would have wanted you to get on with your life, you know, with you and Haily. That’s the best way I think you can honor someone’s memory.”

Hearing his words and staring deeply into Joel’s eyes (or his glasses) Joanna nodded agreeably. A passing Jogger pulled her attentions away, briefly distracting her focus. When she looked back Joel was holding a small blue box open in front of her.

Joanna gasped loudly.

The ring sparkled like the cresting waters lapping quietly beside them.

“Oh- oh my god, Joel,” she stammered.

“I know. It’s fast. It’s probably too soon,” Joel explained with his lopsided grin, “and the last thing I wanted to do was rush you. But you don’t have to say yes right now. You don’t have to say anything. Just think about it okay? Please? I’m only telling you this so you know, so you know how I feel about you and so you know that I’m serious. I don’t have any plans to run off tomorrow and leave you for someone else. I don’t want to be anywhere else. I knew from the minute I first met you I wanted to be with you, and I know you’re still going through a rough time, but I’ll wait… I’ll wait as long as it takes, until you feel you’re ready. I just… wanted you to know is all.”

He seemed to be gasping for breath by that stage and Joanna was barely able to swallow and practically choking on any attempt at speaking along with it. Her chest was tight and her head seemed to be floating. All she could hear over the wild pounding of her heart was the ragged nature of her breathing. She sounded exhausted. Mentally, physically and emotionally she did feel exhausted, but suddenly she was feeling something else with them too.

“Oh baby,” she struggled to squeak out. “It’s beautiful.”

“Benj has a friend out at Compton. Cut me a good deal. I had it custom made. Been working on it for weeks I just… been trying to figure out the best way to tell you was all,” Joel was blushing. “Waiting for the right time… I’ve never done this before.”

Reaching out tentatively Joanna touched it. The diamonds sparkled brilliantly beneath the sultry spring sky. Her grin was a mixture of shock awe and adoration. But there was a hint of sadness to it too. She remembered the day, the moment, the very look on Rob’s face when he had proposed to her too and briefly for that one painful moment it was like her past and her present combined, amplifying the memory. She didn’t even realize a tear had slipped down her cheek until Joel was gently wiping it from her. The flowers now sat on the hood of Haily’s stroller and glimpsing aside at them in her peripheral vision Joanna was haunted by the wreaths of flowers she had seen at Rob’s funerary service. She sobbed and was too quick to mask it behind the palm of her hand. Joel made a sound and she felt herself being crushed against his tee shirt, against his chest, cuddling half falling against him. Though he seemed to berating himself for being so stupid Joanna was quick to tap his back with her free hand in her thankful embrace and tell him that she wasn’t upset.

“I’m happy,” she pledged when she pulled away in his arms. “I’m sad because I’m happy.”

Though it didn’t make sense Joel seemed to read her face and agree with her as if he understood perfectly.

“Everything’s just- everything has just been so much lately… I just feel like I’ve spent the last few months dreaming-”

“This isn’t a dream. I’m real. The way I feel about you is real.”

“I know. Oh my god, I know. Joel, I love you, I do-”

“But?”

“No buts. I love you. It just… might take a while, that’s all. I mean, once sis gets out and things kind of settle down of course I’ll marry you. I just, I mean, we need to sort things out and Haily needs to-”

“Wait, was that a yes?” Joel intercepted unsurely.

Joanna’s mouth fell open as if she only just registered her decision herself. With eyes wide and her heart pounding wildly Joanna felt Joel’s arms wrap around her and hoist her up, turning her around. She was already dizzy and the motion only exacerbated it but by the time he loosed his grip enough for her to slide down she was practically mewing against his lips adoringly. For the first time in a long time she wasn’t thinking about anything else. In that moment locked against his kiss in his strong arms Joanna was finally at peace with the world that had taken so much pain and grief from her to fill up a lifetime. Here now ironically on the edge of the water of the great lake of Central Park Joanna had put her old life behind her and had found herself again in the arms of another man. Her life could begin again anew and the promise of it left an indelible mark etched across the lower half of her face. It was a grin not even the visage of Mike Shinoda staring back blankly from the cover of The New York Times could remove as they continued their stroll through the park in the sun, a young couple in love on the verge of starting a whole new chapter in their lives together.

 

---

 

Better, sis?

[Ravynlee]

---

 

Several miles away in Midtown Fox lingered outside the studios.

As the sun began to set behind the towering high-rises she mingled amidst the crowd held at bay behind barricades watching as the long black limousine shunted past. The ecstatic cries of young girls all begging for a moment of the high flying businessman’s time ricocheted around her like the caws of gulls vying for a scrap of food on the beach. Rolling her eyes aside she blinked at a familiar face and nodded in the direction of another. Both Dave Grohl and Dave Draiman blinked back as they made their way through the teaming throng to opposing ends of the barricades. Turning her frowning face towards the black-clad officers standing watch like fat bored sentinels Fox felt for her gun beneath her jacket and drew strength from the touch of it. The cold hard metal, having warmed against her skin, felt like a living extension of her body now, an enhancement, an evolutionary fifth limb. She smiled to herself feeling emboldened with each drawn breath that she had made it this far and had been virtual meters from him and still Mike had not seen her. Thrill set in with a sick kind of anticipation that made her heart hammer and her mouth pasty and dry and difficult to swallow, yet she relished in it. The thought that with each passing second was counting down to the moment she would take aim and blow holes in the grinning businessman’s face made her skin prickle and ripple all over with morbid delight.

In just a few hours Mike Shinoda would lay dead on the sidewalk and Fox would be smiling down over his bullet-riddled corpse like the Angel of Death herself. All she could hope for was that wherever he was Chester was somehow watching this. In her heart as much as she tried telling herself otherwise, the young woman vowed that in her love for him she would do anything, that Chester would heed her declaration of love and loyalty to him and return to her to the ways that things once used to be.

Then, staring up at the building that stretched high into the pastel sky, Fox summoned in a calming breath and mentally readied herself for the task she was about to undertake.

 

---

 

“I don’t want you to do this,” Rashell begged in the doorway watching the stylists fussing with her husband’s hair with deft professionalism.

She had been repeating this same mantra all day, indeed the whole ride over, almost driven to the point of tears in desperation as much as his silence as Mike continued staring out the tinted windows with his jaw set on his fist blatantly ignoring her. She had awoken that morning feeling ill and light-headed but in a way that she instinctively knew was more than just morning sickness. The truth was yes she was scared, and while Mike had laughed off her earlier resignations saying she was just worried about exposing their private lives to such a grand audience Rashell had fought to make him see that his flippant attitude was far from justifiable, and naturally he wasn’t making her feel any more at ease about it either. While she loved her husband’s ability to be dependable and in control and seemingly take charge of any given situation, especially where it counted most, lately it seemed that Mike’s independence was bordering on cold when it came to his dealings with her. It had been a long time since they had shared any real moment of intimacy where she was able to stare into his eyes and know he was focusing wholly on her like he once did in the old days. But then again it was to be expected now that he was so incredibly busy these days she tried to tell herself. Unsure whether it was her fluctuating hormones or something far more inexplicable she couldn’t put down into words, Rashell had argued with him to at allow her the benefit of being at his side or at least on the sidelines in the studio just to assure herself that nothing bad was going to happen and that, despite the magnitude of the story’s coverage, it really was literally nothing more than any other televised interview she often saw others do on TV and occasionally enjoyed. Tentatively Mike had agreed and given Jos the night off to entertain herself while the two of them made themselves ready for the big night ahead, barely uttering so much as a word by way of conversation between them.

Now standing there in the dressing room watching him stare ahead at himself in the mirror and say nothing Rashell cupped her hands together and to her lips like she was one of God’s children offering up heartfelt utterances of prayer and grimaced in frustration that she wasn’t getting through to her stubborn husband.

“Five minutes Mr Shinoda,” some kid in a Knicks cap announced.

Mike nodded at him. He slid his eyes aside to his wife soberly.

“Don’t worry. Everything will be fine. Trust me,” he told her. Then he suggested she go out and find a seat while he finished getting ready. He waited until she pecked his lips with a parting kiss before he added for her to send in Melissa who was waiting out there in the hallway for a last minute debriefing. Rashell forced out her breaths through her nose as she clamped her lips taut and nodded thinking that the woman staring back in her reflection looked far more composed than she was feeling at that moment. She smiled back tightly.

“Love you,” she vowed as she left the room.

“Yeah,” she heard Mike sigh exasperatedly. “You too.”

The door creaked to a close on its hinges behind her.

 

---

[crazy robster]

Awww sis this was marvellous!! Awesome!! And, to answer your question, YES FAR BETTER! Awww I adored that scene of me and Joely and Haily all together sharing moments of true love!! And the marriage proposal!! Wow that was fast indeed! But I loved it!! Ain't he sweet?? I awwwed so much reading it, it was just... precious. <3 Now as for Mike, I sooo can't wait for him to bring down Chester!! Of course I don't exactly agree with using poor little Ava in this but yeah, like I've said before, in THIS specific battle I'm on Mike's side. That was impulsive, sorry, maybe this is the only drawback in using real life characters. I like Mike far more than Chester in real life so that plays a big part in my decision to support him in this battle in the story lol And one last thing... Poor Rashell is she really that naive or does she pretend she doesn't understand what's going on cause she's madly in love with her husband? I trully feel sorry for her she just wants a normal life with her family...awww... So now, we're getting ready for more action yay!! Oh and please we want more info on the Ravyn-Nick rosy story *hugs*

[Ravynlee]

To answer your question sis the Rav-Nick story is already progressing on my laptop. Just haven't finished that chapter yet. When I do you'll have it.

And sooo stoked you liked it! Yes I know Joel's progressing fast but hey the man knows what he wants and stranger things have happened in real life so why not I say? I seriously never planned that at any point in this story. Another classic example of what happens when you let the characters dictate the story rather than the other way around (as happens with most fanfics). I thought it was an aww moment and I have been conscious of the fact that we need more softer moments in the chaos and warring. The point is it has to be in crucial points otherwise this would go straight from Saw 4 to Sleepless in Seattle, and nobody, especially me, wants anything to do with that :lol:

 

As for Rashell well I think on part she is not naive as much as she is in denial. I see it like (forgive me) an abusive relationship where she can sort of see what's happening but doesn't want to admit it to herself. She's in denial. Remember that all through this she has been Mike's greatest advocate. She sees him as a good man at heart, even if he is a bit neglectful of her. She (sorta like Fox with Chester) clings to the hope things will get better and yes settle down and have that happily-ever-after thing we all sort of want to whatever degree.

 

And it's interesting your opinion of Mike. The more I write about him in this the more his character seems to brood. His grief and lust for revenge has kind of taken on a life all it's own beyond the original scope that I had in mind when I first envisioned this. I never wanted it to be a good versus bad saga because as I explained way back at the beginning even serial killers aren't necessarily born evil, all villains have their 'good sides.' As a writer I do empathize with Mike. Anyone who's lost a loved one and was robbed of justice probably would relate to his plight, only he took it to a level most of us never adhere to. In a way I kind of admire him - but there's another part of me that sees him as a madman. And Chester wronged him but we all make mistakes. There's a limit to all of it. Personally I can almost side with Chester. I don't know why. Mike really is like the darkest part of my psyche. What a dark place that is to be huh? :lol:

 

Anyway thanks again. Thrilled you liked. More later <3

[Pheonix791989]

nice update mum. really nice break from studyin Algorithims and computer programming lol. but yeah its really good.

[Friðbjörn]

wow the romance! sweet indeed

and the mel and mike kiss...omgoshwtfbbq

what's going on there

 

well in light of all the romance and kisses and everything, when does frib get to french-kiss a stranger? haha

[Ravynlee]

*lmfao* Depends - who you want? :lol:

 

Thanks

[Friðbjörn]

haha

does that mean you're considering this?

[Ravynlee]

haha

does that mean you're considering this?

 

Why not? Seems to me you're like the only one not embroiled in some kind of love scandal or affair (why would you want it?? haha) and hey, sis asked for less mayhem and more romance so that's what ya got. Am open to suggestions (providing it fits in to the general realm of things and doesn't detract too much) then hell why not I say?

 

Wow. Maybe the next fic I pen here should be a romance story huh? :lol:

 

And Mel - taking the kiss in your stride huh? What a trooper :thumbsup:

 

More laters.

[woodyloveslinkin]

Man that was a refreshment from the ANZAC parties I went to last night. And on top of my studies (grr...essays...designs...photography that ends up looking shit anyway I do it.....)

I'm lolling at Jojo's reply..still ^.^

BRING CHESTER DOWN .... bastard .... I'm rooting for Mike all the way!

[Ravynlee]

---

 

“That was bullshit. I can’t believe they gave a guy like that free airtime, let alone prime time. Guy’s so in love with himself it’s practically criminal.”

Rolling eyes aside from the magazine in her hands Ravyn acknowledged Nick’s scoff then the wall mounted television screen without so much as a comment. Licking her thumb she turned a page and continued to stare at the articles though mentally she wasn’t absorbing anything of them. The sound of Mike’s voice echoed throughout the recreation room unchallenged by another human inhabitant. Her limbs were rigid and tense and they had been all day now. The muscles in her neck were tight. Gingerly rubbing at the fine scar hidden away beneath her raised collar Ravyn cleared her throat uncomfortably. Hearing Nick laugh sourly at another comment being relayed on the screen in front of him Ravyn finally tossed the mag aside and told him to change the channel.

“I want to watch this,” he said.

He was relaxed back on a plastic chair with his legs outstretched and ankles crossed on another. Behind his head he clasped at his wrist, and the remote, like the master of his domain in his private living room. Staring back at her with his sardonic smile fading he blinked back up at the screen, then back at her and sat up in his seat noticeably.

Still tugging her collar closer about her neck self-consciously Ravyn stirred on her seat before she stood up and made to leave the room.

“Holy shit,” he breathed. “I knew I knew you from somewhere. You’re that girl right, that reporter, the one who he was supposed to have-?”

But by that stage Ravyn was already walking out. Her whole body was quaking by now and she was holding herself as if beset with a fervent chill as Nick followed her out into the hall and scurried alongside apologetically. Despite what his words said he seemed to be more enthralled than sorry and ironically resembled a reporter tagging along to break his big news story. Huffing at the memories Ravyn shouldered her way past and disappeared into her room severing the one-sided conversation, and the echoes of Mike’s voice playing from the TV, behind her closed bedroom door.

Perched on the edge of her bed she was rocking back and forth a little, at the mercy of a non-existent stiff breeze, clamping her jaw shut and stifling the tears that welled in her eyes that she refused to spill. It was hard to swallow and the pain in her neck was indescribable, she hadn’t felt so physically raw since just after it had happened, since she woke up from one nightmare to endure another. Hearing a tentative knock at the door Ravyn blinked aside watching Nick make his way in with his hands up as if gesturing a severance from his previous attitude of moments ago.

“Look, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to… I didn’t know… I mean-” he was saying.

Over the sound of her breaths and of material swishing with his movements there was no other sound to penetrate the silence as he approached and stopped a few metres away in the tiny room. With a thoughtful pause he dropped his eyes to the carpet and dug his fists inside his hip pockets. Nick shrugged as he looked at her but Ravyn could only turn away again. She hated that look he was giving her, the same look that everyone gave her and had done since the day she woke up from it, unable to speak through the pain and the terror and unable to close her eyes for the nightmare freshly imprinted behind her closed lids.

“I’m sorry,” Nick uttered.

He looked downright uncomfortable but Ravyn practically expected it. It was a look she had been dreading but knew well. Now that her secret was out she had lost her identity again and had gone from something of an equal to a victim, what was worse she was ‘his’ victim, it didn’t matter what she did now or until the end of time the fact remained that his actions had forever inextricably intertwined their lives forever, she wasn’t Ravyn she was Mike’s victim, and it was just one more piece of her he had stripped away along with everything else he had already taken. She had thought she had been brave enough to face him and she had stared up at the TV screen for a while glued to his smiling face and absorbing every little nuance as if committing them to memory. But she had been wrong, so terribly wrong, and now sitting here in her room haunted by her memories threatening to burst through the floodgates Ravyn could only feel more worthless than she had before, more vulnerable and lonely. She hadn’t even heard a word of what he’d said but just that cold rich tone of his voice. It ground away at her subconscious even now as she sat there huffing on her breaths and feeling that hot tight sting around her neck, wanting to say something with her lips quivering but unable to say anything.

“Look, for what it’s worth, I believe you,” Nick told her.

He remained in the centre of the room a safe distance away looking awkward and uncertain as he shared his focus between her face and the carpet that divided them.

“I heard what the papers said, how… he got away with it. It’s shit, is what it is… I don’t know what to say-”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Ravyn said. It was, with its guttural delivery, her way of telling him she wanted to be alone at that moment. But rather than leave Nick stopped looked at the door then with a redetermined step made his way over and settled down on the edge of the bed beside her. Ravyn flinched, recoiling at this personal invasion. Though there was no contact and he hadn’t so much as looked at her let alone said anything to her Ravyn’s entire body tensed up on reflex like she was anticipating any moment he would throw her on to the mattress and have his way with her.

“No,” she squeaked in a panic.

In a flash she was on her feet putting what menial distance between them that she could. She knew what he was doing before he well started anything, she knew from experience men were drawn to women who had been sullied before, they were easier to prey on, the hard work had been done for them, hell if one man had already dominated her and taken what he wanted there was no logical reason he couldn’t do the same thing too, or so she was convinced. But glaring back at him from across the room with her arms gripped like steel bars locked across her chest Ravyn stood poised and challenging him. Sitting on the edge of her bed Nick blinked down saying nothing. His joints popped as he scratched the back of his neck pensively. He seemed to take a long time gathering his thoughts together. Outside in the corridor they could hear the hushed squeak of shoes against the squeaky linoleum. When he managed to drag his eyes up from their dance across the carpet Nick’s expression was one of cautious curiosity.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” he said. He met her eyes. Ravyn shook her head at him deflecting the sentiment. Nothing he could say or do was going to get him one step closer to where he seemed to be heading.

“Why are you here?”