The Park Collaboration

[Ravynlee]

Please do not post SUNDAY for another 3 hours as of this post!

 

This is in accordance with the Games Thread post where we (Sarah and I) extended SATURDAY'S hours to make up for the downtime earlier that locked us out for around 6 hours.

 

Please check the Games Thread for more details should you need it

here --> http://www.linkinparkforums.com/showpost.php?p=579624&postcount=226 or

here --> http://www.linkinparkforums.com/showpost.php?p=579613&postcount=221

 

Thanks to all contributing members and as always eagerly anticipate updates from everyone when you can manage it! :thumbsup:

 

Edit: Just so we're clear - Sunday is now fine to post. If anyone's ready!

[Peterdea]

SUNDAY (AKA PETERDEA DAY 4)

For the last two days I have seen her. I struggled to enjoy my birthday simply because she was the only thing I wanted, but I couldn’t have it. Which angered me more then you could imagine. Most of my life my birthday has been a day for me to kick back and/or buy myself whatever the hell I want. But love is something you can’t buy, and it’s something I doubt I’ll ever get an opportunity to experience without giving up my lifestyle which I enjoy…

I still didn’t know her name, but I did know she seems to appear at similar times every day. I kept thinking to myself, does she live nearby? Is she visiting a partner? This is killing me, especially since I have the guts to literally take someone’s life away from them in horrible and painful ways, but I don’t have the guts to talk to someone that I don’t want to kill.

As well as that, yesterday I saw another girl, unfortunately I think I freaked her out, but the look she gave me almost freaked me out. She looked at me and all I could think was does she know? I kind of got the feeling the man I killed a few days ago was somehow related to her. But she seemed depressed and I don’t think I’ll need to do anything about her, I could be just paranoid. Her issues maybe completely different, who knows?

I watched as she got in to a car with a strange looking man. Looking back, he looked like the sort of funny, not serious cop from an old 70s Comedy show.

That was my Yesterday, pretty much being angry at myself and getting a bit paranoid.

But as for today… Today is a lot better in every way shape and form

 

Stephen dropped in pretty early and he looked terrible. He had a black eye and I could tell he was attacked.

“What happened?” I asked him sounding worried. I’d only met the guy once but I do consider him my best friend so I have to care.

“Got jumped, by a local gang. I know who did it, but the cops are just too afraid to intervene.” He told me sounding like a man who had just lost everything.

“Give me the names, I know someone who will get inside the gang and turn them on each other…” I lied. I was planning to destroy them all one by one, or if I got the chance more then one.

“I’ll tell you over a coffee or some shit.” He said sounding a little more enthusiastic. I think he believed me to. It was just a matter of time before my head had formulated plans to kill every single one of those sons of cunts.

 

After Stephen left I thought about it some more. I decided I’d go for a walk just to see if I come up with anything. I found faces to go with the names I was given on the internet, since they had all been in the newspaper for one reason of another.

On my way out, there she was… The worst part of me… The part that held me back and took my mind of the job. I had to talk to her.

I approached her and she looked at me. I tried to smile but I couldn’t even force one. I looked directly into her eyes and she looked directly into mine. She was amazing. But what was I going to say? My heart was racing like you wouldn’t believe.

“Hey, I-I’ve seen you round here before…” I started with. What a shit way to start a conversation. Plus I sounded like a total freaking idiot. What the fuck was I thinking? “I-I’ve seen you round here before” NO FUCKING SHIT DICKHEAD!

“Yeah I like it here. Me and Hugh get along pretty well.” She told me sounding way calmer then I’d ever freaking felt!

“Great…” I managed to get out. That’s all I could say. Seriously anyone got any tips? Help me out here I’m totally pathetic at this.

“My names Celeste, pleased to meet you Mr…” She stopped talking in that way people do when you haven’t given them your name and they are trying to get it out of you.

“M-my names Peterdea, call me Pete.” I managed a smile, progress I suppose, but the fucking stutter. I’m shitting myself by this point, like you wouldn’t believe.

“Pleased to meet you Pete!” She said with a smile. She has a smile like no other. I can tell I’m at least getting somewhere.

“Umm…” I need to think of something to say, but I have nothing, I’m frozen. Maybe I can get help from a neighbour or something if I don’t fuck this up too bad.

“I have to go, cya round Pete!” She waved and turned and walked off. I stood there looking like the biggest freak. I have to get to know the neighbours. There’s a lot of females who live around the place maybe they can help me out here? Or even the guys? Who knows?

 

I walked down the street with my mind still on here. I knew her name and that’s all that I needed at this point.

Suddenly my mind turned back to Steph. I need to take revenge, and I knew just how I was going to do it. First thing I needed was to get inside the gang. Become friends with an elite member of the gang so I can get them all. Sounds easy? Keep in mind this is a dangerous gang we’re talking here, one wrong move and I’m dead and no one will even care. I know I deserve it but I don’t want it. So no risks bigger then necessary!

I had to be friends with Viktor Lavrentiy, one of the highest respected members of the gang. All I can say is, it sucks to be him!

 

I located him and followed him around for an hour until he led me to a bar. I followed him in and sat next to him. He looked pretty proud. As anyone would be if they had the cops fearing them.

There were only about eight of these jokers I need. All Russians. Must be a Russian gang. I don’t care though. I’m not scared of anyone… Well there’s only one person that makes me scared but that’s a different story.

 

I bought him a drink and we talked. Almost déja vu. Stupid people who believe me. This guy is so dead haha. He kept going on about how he was so great and how me has authority over the police and to be quite honest, I don’t care… Who would I? He’s going to be dead soon!

Anyway by the end of the day me and him we’re “friends”. As far as we go, his gang “has my back” and I’m “there for the gang if they need me”. People in New York, so much easier then people anywhere else!

 

After that I went home and that was it, my weekend basically. I’m so glad with how this is turning out for me, I get to kill and I get to chase a girl! I’m always busy!

[DarknessLover]

Sunday

 

I re-awoke. Almost in a plain temperature. I opened my eyes, almost with the immediate desire to be awake. I looked around my bed room, dresser, and my bed, nice and empty, I like it this way, bedrooms have no need to be crowded. I stood up, landing on my numb feet and immediate falling down. Maybe i'm not as awake as I think I am, heh. I stretched out like before, and this time, didn't crack at all. Which annoyed me. The only reason I like to stretch out, is to get that crack. I walked into my living room, and looked around, I had my room all set up, TV in the corner, all hooked up, nicely actually, Futon facing it. I looked over to the side, my desk is set up nicely. computer and everything hooked up. My amp was to the right of the PC. I guess I was practicing something. Other than all that. The room was still relatively empty.

 

I yawned, and sat down at my futon. I layed back, and stared at the ceiling. Oh dammit, what time is it. I walked back into my bedroom, and saw the cellphone on the side of my bed, hm, why did I have my phone? I bent over picked it up, and look over my bed to my mirror. Dammit, i'm not even dressed, I looked at my phone it was only 8:14am which was nice, so I had the whole day to chill. I grabbed a pair of jeans, a Linkin Park shirt, and left my gauntlet, and wallet on the dresser. No need to get pretty. I chuckled and walked back into the living room, I looked over by the door, and noticed a letter next to it. I wondered who left a letter at my door? I walked over questionable, and picked it up. It was some contract, with INSURANCE printed on the top. On the envelope it wrote clearly read "If any questions please speak with Mike, at room 21."

 

I read quickly through the letter. I didn't like the looks of this, it didn't seem official to me. I yawned again. I felt my phone vibrate, and I flipped it open and read the "txt message" it was from Danielle, my ex. I didn't feel like reading it that moment. I sat back on my futon and looked at the ceiling, yeah I should probably go speak with Mike... This doesn't seem completely safe...I remembered the gun I had hid in my desk, in case of an emergency, I stood up, and went and grabbed, the feel of this gun, brought back some terrible memories from my old town...The time I shot my ex's friend in the leg for trying to sexually assault her. It brought chills to me...The gun point situations I have gotten made me feel cold again. I put it in my back pocket and walked to my door.

 

I sighed as I looked around and saw room 21. I flipped open my phone and checked the time, it was 9:21am. I knocked on the door, lightly at first, but harder after the first few knocks. I heard footsteps come to the door. I straightened out and heard the door begin to open, a red headed woman opened the door in nothing more than a black bra, and panties. I twitched, and looked around.

The woman asked "yes? Hello?"

I hesitated to speak at first. but when she seemed to get ready to close the door I abruptedly said "OH sorry, I am Jonathan, a neighbor, I was given an odd letter, and told to come here if any questions?"

She seemed prepared to answer immediately "One moment..." She walked away I heard a small conversation, and heard the footsteps reproach "Go on in back, I'm Sarah, by the way."

"Yeah, I already gave you my name," I felt at my gun in my back. And walked through, I saw a man sitting at a table.

 

"Hello, Jonathan. Feel free to sit down." He pointed the seat on the other side. I sat down and studied him, he was very calm, very normal.

"So, Mike, what is this...insurance?" He chuckled

"Right to business? Good. Basically, bad things happen here, and this apartment building has developed a way to protect you. We just need some money once every so often." I stared him down I knew what he is trying to say.

"Let me guess, problems you cause?"

"You can say that," he chuckled, but turned stern and stared me down.

I saw him reach down. I reached back to my gun. "Is this legal."

He swung his arm out, aiming a gun at me, and I likewise aimed back. "Tell me."

I was prepared to fire, I noticed he had a Desert Eagle, I only had a 9MM, I could just put a knick in him, he could kill me. He began to chuckle and aimed the gun down, I lowered mine slightly. I wasn't taking any chances.

"You've got balls to be carrying a gun on you like that." He put his gun back, I kept mine out, as I said, no chances. "You can go. Don't worry about this for now." I stood up and walked out, I saw the woman, Sarah staring at me.

 

I walked back into my apartment. And stared at my gun. My eyes ripped open. And i looked at the Gun, i forgot fucking ammunition! I could've just died...I started breathing heavily. Where the hell am I? Is this the town i moved into? FUCK, I should've just stayed home.

 

No I need to man up, this is the real world. I looked at my cellphone another text message. I decided to open it this time, I read it, from Danielle "Please call me,soon, it's urgent." I will call her later. I decided to step out again, this time around 10, I saw Sarah, with some man talking, and I nodded. I went downstairs to the mailboxes, and opened it, Junk, Junk, Junk, Parents, Junk, Justin. I went back upstairs and sat behind my desk. Parents? I opened it, and out came 500 dollars. Hm? Why did they send me this, I looked inside, and noticed there was a little letter, "Please, buy a Kitchen supplies." Oh, wow, funny guys! Whatever, I opened my letter from Justin.

 

“Yo, if you want to jam again let me know. It was fun, maybe next time we will stay a little more sober and jam more. Ight you know where I live, Peace – Justin.”

 

I chuckled after reading this, very interesting. I looked at my cellphone...shit i should just call Danielle.

 

I dialed her number in...

 

"Hey Danielle?"

"Jonathan! Oh my god thank you for calling." Her voice was cracking.

"What's wrong?"

"I got in a huge fight with my parents, I had to leave, I can't stand this anymore"

"Shit, where you going to stay?"

"Where do you think?" I wondered....hmm she can't really stay at any of her friends houses...

"Mine?"

"Please? Just for awhile?" I sighed, really, I can't say no.

"Of course Danielle, you know where I live now right?"

"Yes" Her voice was cracking. "Thank you so much." and she hung up.

 

Great so now I have someone else going to be in this crappy apartment? I guess she can sleep on the futon. I decided to cut this out of my mind for the moment, and walked over to my Xbox, and turned on Rock Band, and played for about 5 hours straight...

 

I turned off my television, it was now around 4pm. My mind was pounding, and my heart was beating quickly, too much has happened today, I can't enter back into reality right now. I tried to stand up, but immediately hit the ground. Jesus...not again....I began to panic, thoughts rushing. I crawled into the bathtub in the other room, and layed in it and turned the shower on. I blacked out.

 

I re awoke, around about 11:30pm. I opened my eyes, to the water hitting me, I reached up and turned off the faucet. I stripped myself of my clothes and put them up on the curtain holder. I walked into my bedroom and put on some jeans and my jacket...not necessarily sleep wear, but I am going out for a walk, I need a breather. I walked out of my apartment and down the steps, and outside, the whole street was empty...It didn't bother me much. I walked down the road and flipped open my cellphone, 11:40pm, just a few more minutes to midnight. I saw a group of men, all shadowy figures sitting before an alleyway, I felt an uneasy feeling in my stomach, but ignored it and kept walking. I reached the men, and one of the figures said "Hey." I turned around to someone punching me in the face, and two others pushing me down the alley. "What the fuck, who do you people think you are."

 

"It doesn't fucking matter none."

"Fuck this" I stood up and reached for my gun. One pushed me down to the ground.

"You ain't going no where. You will pay for your threat."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

I noticed one pull out a gun. "You never fuck with our boss." I heard the gun click...

 

 

 

*************

 

It's Midnight, can't go farther than that.

 

:ok::spiteful:

[woodyloveslinkin]

Sunday

10.59 am

Mike sat up to the sunshine that made its way into the bedroom. He groaned as he covered his head with the covers and groaned. He had slept in an empty bed all night, and he wasn’t happy for several reasons. He didn’t know it but Sarah had gone out for a couple of minutes to ask Rob if Mike had behaved himself that night. Well, actually, Mike had gone back to sleep to be technical. He got woken up about nine or so by another neighbour called Jonathon about the insurance business. Mike was just too tired and he could hide it pretty well, up to the point where Jonathon left. He didn’t want to be rude. Mike wasn’t happy as well that Sarah had answered the door in her underwear and her bra, as Mike was the only guy that was supposed to see her like that and she had just showed it off to another man. Well, at that stage Mike knew that Sarah had been home but why didn’t she come to bed with him? Mike felt the coldness of the weapon next to him that he had used against Jonathon. The point where Sarah had shut up for once and didn’t say anything. Sarah didn’t know that Mike had a gun and now felt really unsafe by its presence. Mike assumed that Jonathon would automatically say yes to his insurance proposition but he didn’t.

Why couldn’t Jonathon be like Rob, dumb as a stump? The insurance company’s name was called S.C.A.M – Social Contents Accreditation Money. Just like F.A.G off Team America, Famous Actors Guild.

Mike removed the sheets from his head, as he figured there was no point being in bed for the day, and the removal of the sheets revealed the desert eagle which was a powerful weapon when in possession of some evil plans. Well, Mike was only trying to do well but he was driven to the point of using his old weapon that he had stashed away just for emergencies. Not even Sarah knew about. And then Mike realised that’s what has scared her off. But if she didn’t sleep in the same bed with him last night, and she didn’t know about the weapon, what was the thing that stopped her? Was it just because he was snoring too loud?

Mike remembered Jonathon and him holding the guns at each other and the look that each of them were giving, while Sarah whimpered in the corner still in her undergarments. There were tears in her eyes and Mike didn’t like to make her cry.

When Jonathon left Sarah didn’t say a word to him and got changed into something decent. And then Mike couldn’t care less and went back to sleep, with his weapon alongside him just in case Jonathon came back to swipe Sarah or something.

Mike didn’t know where Sarah was and was a bit afraid that Sarah might’ve packed up and left him just over that incident.

“How was he, Rob?” asked Sarah, as she sat next to Rob on the seat on the roof, as each of them looked over the buildings and the horizon.

“He was grand,” answered Rob, smiling. “I know, I shouldn’t be saying this, but I’m scared for your safety with Mike around. You seem like a nice person. Like I don’t blame you for yelling at him because of the sexual harassment–”

“How did you find that out?” asked Sarah, interrupting Rob, frowning.

“An angel in my ear told me,” answered Rob, not wanting to mention names. “I don’t think you should be with him. Maybe I’ve just been listening to Ravyn too much and not enough of myself. I think she’s delusional anyway, I mean…I don’t know what I mean. There’s just so much happening in such a short period of time. First it was moving in, then the business with Hugh, having the woman you love freak out and getting a job.”

“Look, Mike’s no sex freak he’s not, can we just leave it at that?” asked Sarah. “I’ve known the guy for ages and trust me; it’s the last thing that he will ever become.”

“Don’t tell that to me, tell that to my missus,” answered Rob. “There are times where I don’t want to let her go, but at the same time I’m getting sick of the accusations, secretly, inside, it’s getting too much for me at times. I feel like I’m staying with her because of what happened with Vincent at times.”

“Do I want to know?” asked Sarah, slowly. Rob shook his head. “Good. I don’t want to know. Not that I think the worse is that after what she thinks about Mike, I don’t take such crap. It’s bad enough that my mother hates him; I don’t want the neighbours to hate him. I mean, what happens if she somehow talks to my mother and convinces her that Mike’s a predator.” Sarah didn’t want to tell Rob but she was at that emotional level that she had to say it. “I had a miscarriage last year and I’ve never gotten over it.”

“Well,” Rob didn’t know what to say so he told the truth. “Would explain the drunken moments and the parties and all. You shouldn’t drink yourself stupid just because you had a miscarriage. I know my friend had one a couple of months ago, that was a disaster, and she was all over the place. So if you had a miscarriage, then what’s Mike’s excuse for getting drunk?”

“Cos he wasn’t’ the father, someone else was, he knew from day one that he wasn’t the father I’ve always been honest with the man,” answered Sarah. “As much as I love him, I think I don’t want to marry him anymore. Especially after this morning’s episode. That I’m not telling anyone about.” She was stern on the last point. She checked her watch and realised that work wanted her in half past eleven today and had to go a straight shift until eight. “I have to go now, sorry; I have to go to work.”

“That’s okay,” replied Rob, as both of them got to their feet. “Do you want me to drive you?” She shook her head, as she smiled and walked away. She saw Ravyn enter the roof’s door with a pot plant in her arms and she smiled. Sarah didn’t smile as she walked back downstairs and back into the apartment. She didn’t say hi to Mike as there was no Mike to say hello to. He had gone somewhere else.

She gotten into her uniform and left with further ado. She walked down the straight texting away at her cell phone when a familiar face came up next to her.

“Hey sweetie,” he said, as Sarah realised that Justin was talking to her. She smiled. “I take it you’re working tonight?” She nodded and then Justin realised that she was in her uniform.

“How’s things?” asked Sarah.

“The usual, Hugh’s gotten into a bit of trouble with the mafia apparently,” answered Justin. “Haven’t you heard?” Sarah shook her head, as they stopped at a set of traffic lights. “Seems Mike’s being interviewed by the cops. Know anything about some bashings happening?” Sarah shook her head again. “You don’t hear very much for a woman. Unusual.”

“I like to keep to myself,” replied Sarah with a girly little smile.

“I bet you do,” Justin couldn’t help but to say. “I’m having a little get together tonight, if you want come around, it’ll only be just you and me, I swear. Nothing too…exposed.”

“I’m working until late,” replied Sarah, as the pedestrians started to cross. She started to cross as well with Justin. “I’m sorry, but I would dearly appreciate it if you came and kept me company tonight at the diner. It’s going to be a long night and I really don’t want to talk to Ravyn tonight.”

“Sure thing,” smiled Justin.

It was hours until Sarah finished her shift. Ravyn started her shift a couple of hours after Sarah and neither one of them really talked much to each other. Ravyn had left before she could get a chance to get a lift back with her and Rob, so Justin offered to walk her back. Sarah smiled and accepted his offer. It took them half an hour or so to walk back because they were dawdling like flirtatious teenagers in the street. Justin walked Sarah to her door, despite the fact that his door was just a couple of metres over. They exchanged goodbyes and left each other at her door.

Sarah could see there were no lights on, no anything, and it was just minutes to midnight and Mike wasn’t anywhere to be found. She didn’t want to be here in this place with Mike and his new weapon that Sarah had a feeling he had been keeping for ages. She gotten changed into her PJs and knocked on Justin’s door.

“Hi again,” Sarah said to Justin, as Justin had a piece of paper in his hands.

“Hi,” replied Justin. “Is there something I can help you with?”

“Can I stay the night?” asked Sarah. “I don’t want to be with Mike tonight. I want to be with you tonight.”

“Sure thing,” answered Justin, opening the door for her. “You sure wanna stay the night? The house is a bit messy.” It was just a tad according to Sarah with pieces of paper and pens everywhere scattered on the floor.

“I’m sure,” replied Sarah.

****

[Ravynlee]

Sunday

 

“How’s the head?” Rob murmured.

He sat at the table and barely looked up as she entered the room. Ravyn groaned and fisted her eyes. She shrugged. It was afternoon already. She had slept half the day. Obviously the alcohol, or the culmination of it and lack of decent sleep, had worked wonders for she had indeed slept well.

Having woken to the sound of music and the sound of someone’s car backfiring on the street below Ravyn shuffled out, shielding her eyes from the sun streaming in through a side window. She winced. At the table Rob sat nursing his cheek on his fist and tapping a pen in his other hand. He was staring with vested concentration at a sheath of papers piled in front of him. Music was playing from the stereo. Was that The Police? Ugh, she groaned. It wasn’t just because she’d suffered through 80’s pop as a teenager, but the obscure reference to the band’s name that had her pouting to herself dubiously. Police, cops, psycho ex-boyfriends who didn’t know the meaning of the word ‘no,’ what next?

“What’s that?” she asked nodding towards the papers. Ravyn could still read without her glasses but doing so forced her to squint noticeably. She hadn’t had them for very long and still sometimes forgot to wear them let alone where she put them, feeling like that forgetful old lady from the Looney Toons cartoons. She smiled but Rob didn’t look up at her. Rob shrugged in a huff.

“Just… stuff,” he said. He sounded bored. No, he sounded mad.

Nodding in acknowledgement Ravyn altered her course away from him and into the kitchenette. Though he hadn’t looked up she continued to watch him reading his papers. She tried to tell herself he was just concentrating but the cold feeling in her stomach told her otherwise. Fixing herself from leftover meatloaf she heated it in the microwave and made a strong cup of coffee before she managed to speak again.

“I’m sorry… about last night,” she said. She lingered just behind him stabbing at her meatloaf waiting for Rob to say something. He didn’t. He turned another sheet of paper over and started scribbling something on it with his pen.

“Rob? Did you-”

“I heard,” he said. The papers rattled again. He cleared his throat and sighed. A moment later he pushed his chair back and stood up, taking his papers with him. Ravyn caught sight of the header, or the letters on top of the page in fact, before they fell to Rob’s side. S.C.A.M. Jesus Christ, he had to be kidding didn’t he? Scam? Ravyn resited the urge to laugh out loud as she looked up into her boyfriend’s eyes. How could he be so naive, seriously?

“You’re angry?” The question was rhetorical of course, judging by the look Rob gave her as he pushed the chair back in place under the table. He made a sound and smirked at her. He turned away. That horrible feeling in her stomach came back again as she watched him approach and pass with Mike’s Insurance papers in tow, “You are I can feel it.”

She watched him gather up his keys and wallet and phone into his pockets before he opened the door. Only then did he stop and turn back towards her. His broad shoulders fell with a sigh.

“Don’t put words in my mouth, okay?” He said. No, that was a warning.

Ravyn didn’t reply and the food in her mouth tasted like bile now but she couldn’t spit it out. Please just hit me, she wanted to say, hit me and end this, anything to put this growing tension behind us once and for all. But of course she couldn’t. Rob wouldn’t understand, he would just think she was acting up again, a basket case to tolerate and nothing more. What was worse was that she couldn’t do anything about the guilt within her, further exacerbated by the hangover, thinking that she had done this to herself, that she had walked right into it with her eyes wide open and in so doing had cleared Mike and his associated bullshit of all culpability altogether.

“You’re wrong about him okay?” Rob uttered, as if reading her mind.

“Who?”

“Who do you think? Mike.”

That one word made her sickness come back as she lowered her eyes defensively towards the floor. In her head she caught flashes from the night before, hearing Mike’s laughter in her ears and the look in his eyes as he sat barely metres away from where she now stood smirking at her introspectively. She shook her head. Why was she getting a sick thrill thinking of him and why did she hate herself so much for it now? Nothing had happened, and she certainly didn’t think she had sent him any flirtatious signals, she wouldn’t, the man was dangerous, she knew better than anyone what dangerous men could do - once bitten twice shy, or so the saying went, and it was a path she had no intentions of straying down again, but still… She was right about him and deep down she knew it, she just couldn’t understand how someone like Rob who she knew really wasn’t as stupid as he acted couldn’t see it.

“He’s my boss, Rave. Drunk or not, you… do what you did again last night and… just… like, sober up, okay?” Rob said his monotone unusually tight. “I’ll be on the roof if you need me.”

Ravyn nodded and didn’t say anything; she couldn’t, as he looked at her, then at the floor, then left the apartment, closing the door behind him.

 

 

High up above the street Rob frowned to himself anxiously. His head was a mess but the thoughts contained within he had no intentions of sharing with anyone. He couldn’t. There was no one to tell, all his friends and family were back home in LA and he was stuck here babysitting his crazy on-again off-again girlfriend. Rob scoffed to himself as he thought about what that word really meant - he wasn’t sure he knew anymore. A girlfriend he would be able to touch without being looked at like some rapist, a girlfriend would have been supportive, she would have encouraged him to branch out, to try and support him in new endeavours not undermine and second guess him, or be so damned independent that he may as well not even be there, a girlfriend was supposed to be someone he could talk to and laugh with and take out like he all his other girlfriends before her, like they had in the past, back before this shit with Vincent - the man with the badge and the gun and the hedonistic attitude - had happened. Rob couldn’t even think of that name without cursing to himself.

“Bastard,” he muttered, but the anger was directed inward to himself.

Staring out at the city, at the street basking in the contrast of bright light and shadow, Rob blamed himself again for his part in Ravyn’s (or as he then knew her as Rachel’s) downfall. If only she hadn’t been so distant, he thought, if only she hadn’t tested him one too many times and he hadn’t broken up with her again, maybe she wouldn’t have taken that drastic step in trying to kill herself. She had never said it was because of him, but he knew it. After so many years of dealing with her pendulum-like moods, of reading between the lines, of listening to what she didn’t say more than what she did, if only things had been different, if only, if only… Not that any of it mattered anyway, what was done was done, but still Rob felt the burden of guilt and reasonability on his shoulders like a physical pressure.

Hearing a noise behind him Rob hesitated in looking back because he didn’t really want to face her just now. When he saw a flash of red hair in his peripheral vision he turned towards it. Noticing it was Sarah Rob smiled reflexively, relieved he didn’t have to put on an act anymore. He watched her light up a cigarette and exchanged simple greetings before she made her way over and settled beside him. He shook his hear at her offer of a smoke but he didn’t deny her the chance to talk. The truth was he liked Sarah. That was to say, he liked what he didn’t know about her – having learnt to accept the bad traits he knew like the yelling and screaming and all night drunken parties. As a rule he didn’t like women that drank; their defences went down far too easily and rendered them to dumb little girls looking at any guy in their arms like orphans needing affection, or like the golden rule of little girls looking for their father’s validation vicariously through their male partners. But Rob didn’t sign on to be anyone’s father figure let alone Ravyn’s and figured Sarah had enough faith in Mike not to need anything from him other than good old fashioned company. Having lived with someone who kept him at an arm’s length most of the time, Rob was happy to sit next to anyone who didn’t seem so scared and edgy with his burly build and serious facade. Besides, he had seen Sarah around enough to know she wasn’t fragile (from overhearing hers and Mike’s countless arguments), he knew that she could hold her own when needed, and he also knew that she knew how to work her feminine wiles. Catching a hint of cleavage pouring from her top Rob cleared his throat and looked away. When he looked back the second place he looked was into her blue eyes.

“How was he, Rob?” she asked him.

He immediately tuned in to what she was thinking. He may have looked lost but it amused him to no end to see how people really acted when they thought no one perceptive was watching. Rob smiled remembering the jokes he and Mike had shared over dinner during the night that had just passed.

“He was grand,” he said. But no sooner had the words fallen from his mouth than the mood seemed to plummet. Damn it Ravyn, why was she infecting his thoughts with her poison? Hadn’t he paid his dues now, wasn’t giving everything up enough, he thought irately. But the conversation continued.

Out beneath the sultry sun and the noise of a city in motion buzzing around them, Rob and Sarah talked. News about her miscarriage surprised him but he tried to be a sympathetic ear as much as a voice of reason. Sarah hadn’t opened up to him for a lecture, he knew, like him she must have just wanted attention, an ear to listen to her, a sounding board to bounce ideas off. Now that Mike was busy orchestrating this new business of his maybe he was just a substitute, but to that end Rob didn’t mind. He had no intentions of stealing a kiss or anything more from anyone, as much as the urges kept coming back to him. She was his boss’s wife now, or would be, and besides, he sighed, he was taken too, apparently.

It ended when Sarah realised the time and excused herself to go get ready for work. Rob stood with her and offered her a lift. He cursed to himself, damn it, what a dumb thing to say, he didn’t even have a car anymore, it was another luxury he had to get rid of thanks to insurance claims and such that an ex cop could have been able to trace if they were unfortunate enough to get into an accident. Again, along with the best parts of his happiness quashed it was just one more thing Vincent had inadvertently taken away from them. Still, he felt as if he were letting her down when Sarah declined and began walking away. The smile she wore made his face warm but only because of the memories that it triggered. He almost forgot what it felt like to smile that way and truly mean it. When the door creaked open and Ravyn stepped out the smile stammered. Ravyn was carrying a pot plant in her hands as she uttered words of hello. Sarah didn’t respond to her, she just kept on walking and took the rest or Rob’s smile away with her.

“What was that all about?”

Rob shrugged. “Nothing.” He searched for his papers. They were fluttering in a breath of a stray breeze. He went to them, anything to avoid the look he could feel searing into his back across the rooftop. He gave her a solemn look but could see the doubt there staring back at him.

“Nothing happened,” he exclaimed, “we just talked.”

Tired of defending himself, tired of a lot of things, Rob rubbed his brow irritably and began to walk away from her. Then he stopped and returned and reached out, pulling the much shorter woman against his chest. He didn’t hear what she muttered into his shirt and he wasn’t really listening. In his hands the letters S.C.A.M. stared back. Rob pouted dubiously. Pushing a sigh through his nose he held her a little tighter as if in his own way trying to apologize.

As usual he didn’t know exactly why but he let it slide as he always did and not long after that walked his fractured girlfriend to work. He kissed her cheek and watched her go inside, promising to be back when the shift was over and that he loved her and to have a good night at work.

Work. Scam. Insurance. Vincent. Jesus Christ, he felt like he was being snowballed with each new day’s development. Still he waved and chuckled and did the right thing, watching her hurry inside to pick up her new life that for once, despite his initial concerns, Rob was actually relieved not to be a part of. He wandered home and stayed alert, watching a young man with long hair and a tapered face make his way past the front steps. Rob didn’t know him but the guy smiled and went on his way. He envied the other man’s air of confidence wishing it was something he’d remembered to bring over from Los Angeles. Climbing the stairs to the top floor with heavy lazy steps Rob heard the sound of others in conversation and tried to look disinterested while the gossip followed. With a jangle he inserted his key into the lock and twisted it, smirking at the internal politics that community living brought with it. Give him the open air and the sea and the sand any day, he thought. The he stopped - hearing the word ‘cops’ made Rob freeze in his tracks momentarily. He craned outside again but whoever had been speaking it had either slipped inside their apartments or simply disappeared.

With a frown Rob closed the door. He locked it. He made sure it was secure.

 

 

That night Rob lay staring at the ceiling with his mind reeling cursing the horrid heat that made his body slick and sweaty and made him stick to the sheets like some second discarded layer of skin. Beside him Ravyn slept and he was thankful for it. His mind was busy enough without trying to soothe her insecurities let alone speak for the sake of doing so. In truth he was still thinking about the gossip he had heard, something about Mike and cops and the word Mafia that made no sense to him when he strung them all together – it was unfathomable. Not his neighbour Mike, not his new business partner, not the man that sat at his table less than 24 hours ago, enjoying the tenor of his company. Groaning in frustration Rob pushed himself up and went to fetch himself a glass of water. He needed to do something anyway, he was restless, and it wasn’t made any better knowing he shared a bed with a woman that was likely to get hysterical if she awoke to anything more than a friendly kiss from him. Leaving the lights off Rob padded out to the kitchenette and stood in the cool blast of air wafting from the refrigerator. Hearing voices again he stopped and looked around. It was coming from out in the hallway. Who the hell was that? Was that Sarah?

Quietly Rob closed the fridge and made his way over to the front door and slid the chain lock back, carefully watching for signs of movement over his shoulder. Slowly he inched it open just a fraction. He peered out. He couldn’t see anything. The hallway light was blown. Another job to address in the morning – if he could find Hugh that was to tell him. Thinking he was imagining things and just delirious from the heat Rob was about to retreat when he heard the voice again and stopped. He looked closer.

“Can I stay the night? I don’t want to be with Mike tonight. I want to be with you tonight,” he heard a familiar voice say.

Rob closed the door and leant against it. He frowned to himself in the dark. What had he just stumbled across?

[woodyloveslinkin]

****

 

Monday.

 

“Um…someone……Rob….come here!” yelled Sarah standing on the roof in her PJs. She looked over to the corpse on the ground. She knew who it was of. Giselle. She knew she hadn’t seen Mike for a while now, as she had come home that evening he wasn’t home. And when she had left Justin’s place this morning he still wasn’t there. Where was he? Was the question that was running through her head and now was only half past eleven. Rob was in the little greenhouse on top of the roof that somehow Sarah missed, probably because it was around the corner from the entrance of the roof. He came out of there and ran over to Sarah as Rob hadn’t even walked over to where Sarah stood to Giselle’s body laid there. Stabbed in a million spots. She looked to Rob. “What do we do now?”

“Do we want the cops involved?” asked Rob to himself but Sarah mistook the question and shrugged. Sarah read his panicky body language. He knew he wanted to do the right thing but he didn’t know what to do. “Um…” Sarah could imagine Mike doing the same thing. Standing around confused and not knowing what to do. "I freak out when I say this...but maybe the cops? Not saying it's the best thing...but...I don't know what to do....Jesus...I'm torn between what is right and....What do you think?"

“But if we call the cops…the sexual harassment claims…and the apparent bullshit about the bashings are in the air…what do we do Rob?” asked Sarah, as he told to her to keep her voice down because he was afraid that Ravyn would return from her shift, that Sarah knew had started at seven because she had a sneak peak at her roster last night. Rob looked hesitate while Sarah looked worried about Giselle’s corpse. “Do we hide her?” Rob nodded.

“Grab her legs I’ll grab her arms,” Rob ordered.

“What are we going to do with her?” asked Sarah.

“Throw her off down into the alleyway, she’s starting to decay,” answered Rob, as they picked the corpse and threw it off the building, causing a clank and a bang in the alleyway. Sarah didn’t know about Rob but she winced when at the last minute she realised that Giselle wasn’t as light as feather and was going to fall.

She heard someone go -

What the fuck was that? Meh, probably a stupid cat.

“We have to get out of here,” Sarah advised as Rob nodded and they both dropped what they were doing and left the roof. Rob didn’t want to go home just in case Ravyn threw a thousand questions at him about where he had been, it was the last thing he wanted, so he went over to Sarah’s place. “You know you’re going have to go home sometime and face her. She’s like every other woman she has needs and you’re ignoring it which isn’t a very healthy relationship.” Sarah opened the door and stepped on yet another piece of paper, which had Justin’s name on it. He had visited her when she wasn’t home and she blushed thinking about how practically nothing had happened the night before between them. But she still couldn’t figure out who was the leaver of the other note the other night. Was that note for her or was it for Mike? Maybe that’s the reason he wasn’t home, Mike was too busy fucking another chick and had just abandoned her with a rent that she couldn’t pay just by herself. Rob closed the door behind him as Sarah walked over to the couch and sat down, as she read the note.

Just dropped by to say hi

That’s all

~ Justin

She smiled again as she felt Rob sit next to her. She could feel him breathing down on her as she knew he was reading what it said on the note from Justin.

“Oh God, don’t tell me you two are….?” Rob asked Sarah looking from the note to Sarah. Sarah smirked as she pushed Rob off away playfully. “Oh my God, Sarah and Justin, wow an unlikely couple. But aren’t you still with Mike?”

“Things are going downhill between us,” Sarah shortly answered as Rob sat back up as there was a knock at Rob’s door, because the sound was near but it wasn’t her door. “You better go and get that.”

“Rob?” asked Mike.

“Mike?” asked Sarah, jumping to her feet and running through the door as she suddenly had a mood swing and wrapped her arms around Mike who look like he’d just been ran over with a car. Sarah was worried as she noticed the damage done to him. “What happened?”

“Some crazy ass hit me with their car on the way over,” answered Mike, looking a bit guilty. Rob appeared by Sarah’s side. “Hey man, can you do me a favour right now?”

“Can’t, sorry, just realised I’ve got to pick up Rave from work, I’ll do it later,” apologised Rob detaching himself from Mike and Sarah.

“Why do I feel like you’re not telling me something?” asked Sarah, as Mike walked past Sarah and went into his apartment that he hadn’t been in for a fair good couple of hours. Sarah realised that she had to go to work in a couple of hours and that they kept on changing the roster on her every night. “Mike, please talk to me.” Sarah ran in after Mike who by now had picked up the note from Justin that Sarah had accidentally left inside.

“What’s this?” asked Mike, picking up the piece of paper. Sarah stopped in her tracks. “What the fuck is this Sarah?! You’re cheating on me with…that asshole?!”

“It’s not what you think it is, we’re just friends…” Sarah tried to explain, but she knew something wasn’t right with Mike’s attitude. His eyes were bloodshot red and he was paranoid. “Are you stoned, Mike?”

“No, what the fuck are you talking about…whore!” yelled Mike, walking over to the other side of the room and ripping up Justin’s note. Then it feel out, the pack of weed out of his pocket and onto the floor. Sarah ran towards it but Mike got to it first and pushed Sarah aside sending her to the ground. Mike turned to Sarah. “You fucking squeal and that’ll be the last thing you do ever.” Sarah nodded as she started to cry. She didn’t know what had gotten into him so quickly. “You hear me? We’re going to get married and we’re going to have lots of kids and you’re going to be a good and faithful wife to me, you hear me?” Sarah nodded as Mike showed her the weed in the small plastic bag in his hand. “This…you see this, you are to shut up about this. Say a word and you’ll regret ever falling asleep. You hear me loud and clear?” Sarah nodded again, as Mike left the room.

She wanted to get out of here. Paradise had suddenly turned into a living planet hell and she was finding herself in a place no woman ever wanted to be in. She knew if she called her mother for help Mike would do something to her…would he…would he beat her? Sarah crawled to the couch and sat on the couch staring at the television while deep in thought. Did she really want to be in this relationship now? Was everything turning out to be one big nightmare and that she only needed to wake up from it? Was…it her that was ruining this relationship?

Mike sat on his bed with the weed bag out and was currently rolling a joint. He was so fucking annoyed, he couldn’t feel it but he knew something was going to happen. Someone was going to reveal his plan. He had to make it more sophisticated. He held the joint in his mouth and lit it with the lighter in his pocket. He took a drag in as he felt the drugs intoxicating him. He felt so much better now and he was less stressed. He walked back into the living room where Sarah was still sulking on the couch.

She looked at him with the lit joint in his mouth.

“Hugh is going to kill you if he finds out you’re smoking inside,” Sarah reminded him quietly not knowing what the end result of her reminding her partner would be. She was going to tell him Giselle’s body that she and Rob had thrown over the edge and into the alleyway right next to the apartment complex.

“He meant smoking cigarettes not weed, stupid,” retorted Mike, as he came and sat down next to Sarah. “Why do I deserve a cheating bitch?”

“I didn’t do anything, more like what did you do over that night at Ravyn’s to get a letter under the door?” asked Sarah, trying to stand up for herself. “Was it her that wrote that thank you letter? Was it? No wonder I can’t find it, anymore, because you’ve taken it from, you want to hide the evidence!”

“Just shut your mouth,” muttered Mike rolling his eyes at Sarah, as he took another drag of the joint and blew the smoke in Sarah’s face. “You are so damn lucky that I haven’t killed Justin by now. Should’ve known better with that last child of yours wasn’t mine.”

“Mike, we had just barely been going out then,” mumbled Sarah, as she thought that a strong defiance would mean a strong backlash. “Please, Justin and I are just friends…”

“Yeah fucking right and I’m the Queen of England, stop fucking thinking I’m so fucking stupid Sarah!” yelled Mike at Sarah. Sarah didn’t know what to say, for the first time ever.

“So sorry,” Sarah mumbled.

“That’s alright,” Mike took another drag and got to his feet, leaving Sarah there by herself on the couch and started to search for some cash that he had hidden away from Sarah in his sock drawer. “I’m going get some money from some people, and put food on our table for you tonight. If that stupid tree stump of a man comes back home with his no good nosey bitch tell him to give me those forms he was meant to give to me, don’t know when but now I need to prove that I have a business to some people. Hugh’s doing me a great favour and you’re not even happy for me. Typical bitch.”

“Mike, I think you should quit the weed,” Sarah advised but Mike rolled his eyes. “I’m curious, how did you get it in the first place?”

“People I know, they know certain other people that I know am friends with, it’s a small world ain’t it?” asked Mike, as he found the cash and checked his back pocket to make sure his weapon was still reachable. “Don’t ask me stupid questions woman. You know, you make it difficult to make me love you at times.”

“I know the feeling,” Sarah mumbled to herself, as Mike closed the drawer and went out to kiss his partner on the cheek, as Mike blew smoke into her face again.

“See you tonight,” farewelled Mike, as he smiled and walked away, slamming the door as he left the apartment. He ran into Jonathon on the way down, the ground floor to be exact, and give him the finger for not taking in on the deal.

“So fucking what, big guy?” asked Jonathon. “Don’t want your dirty money.” Mike stopped and laughed. “You’re an ass. She deserves better.”

“Shove it up your ass and shit it out some other place than in my sight,” retorted Mike, giving Jonathon the finger again and walking away.

There was a knock at the door, but Sarah didn’t want to answer it. There was another knock and another knock. She wasn’t in the mood for talking to anybody. She was afraid that she was going to say something that would lead to the whole story being blurted out.

“Sophie or Sarah is it?” asked the voice that she had recognised as being Pete’s. That was a surprise to Sarah. “I know you’re in there, or I assume you are. I recognised your voice from the diner, I was here just looking for Hugh. You’re the waitress, remember from the other night? I don’t know what happened but if you open the door I promise he won’t hurt you.”

Sarah didn’t say or do anything to indicate that she was home. She heard a heavy sigh and then footprints departing from it. She didn’t know what to do. So she did what she needed to do, clean up the house and get ready for work.

It was now 1 pm and she as walking down the same old street to her work in her pink and white uniform. She had her blue denim jacket on and had her hands neatly tucked away in them.

“Hey cutie pie, you’re avoiding me or something?” asked the voice that belonged to Pete. “I knew you were in there when I knocked earlier on. Don’t take me as a fool, I knew that you were there.” Sarah didn’t say anything to him. She just wanted to be left alone. She felt like she was doing Mike wrong by talking to another man outside of his permission. She loved Mike, she would do anything for him, but his attitude today was ridiculous and again, she didn’t know what to do or say. “Come on, at least say hi to me.”

“Hi,” replied Sarah shortly.

“You’re going to give me all those nice meals you gave me the other night?” asked Pete. “They were really nice.” Sarah didn’t say anything.

“I’m not in the mood, I’m late, and I need to get to work,” Sarah mumbled, as Pete stopped in his tracks behind her. She just kept on walking until she could walk no more. She hated that night. The boss was being annoying and bossy, more than usual. She hardly got any tips tonight and Pete hadn’t followed her to her work and ordered food off the menu that he in the end didn’t eat. She dropped several things as well, sending broken cheap china everywhere and food as well.

She had a hard night and was looking forward to going home. She got a lift back with one of the other girls that she had grown to befriend, that Rebecca woman that stood mostly behind the counter giggling at other people, the brown haired one. Rebecca reminded Sarah a lot of herself, a notorious little flirt, the brown hair that she once had, now artificially dyed red and a little social bird. She thanked Rebecca as she closed the door and walked into her apartment complex and then up the stairs that seemed like she was taking the stairway to heaven. She opened the front door and chucked everything on the bench. There was a smell of food around, nice food, not the cheesy takeaway food that Mike usually liked to make.

“Why weren’t you home for dinner?” asked Mike, coming out of the shadows, suddenly scaring Sarah as she tried to regain her breath. He was smoking another joint, inside the house, which Sarah couldn’t have been bothered getting hyped about.

“Was at work,” answered Sarah. “Not going to argue. I’m tired and I’m fed up already with my job.”

“Come work with me darl, you’ve always been welcomed to join me and Hugh in the insurance business,” offered Mike, as Sarah shook her head. “Why not?”

“I said it once before I am not going to have any participation in this business, what you do for this business of yours is your life not mine, I choose to spend my life outside of jail, instead of inside one,” answered Sarah. “I’m going to bed.”

“I’m going out, I’ll be back to join you in a couple of hours,” replied Mike, as he walked past her and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Sarah wiped it off, as he closed the door behind him and proceeded to go in search of Hugh. Sarah kicked her shoes off and got changed into her PJs, and she climbed into bed. It was only half past ten but she felt like she was going to be sleeping for eternity. She pulled the covers over here but didn’t go straight to sleep. She stared at the ceiling as the influx of the lights that Mike had left on from in the living room seeped underneath the closed door that separated the bed that they shared and the last room that Sarah saw Mike exit. Tears ran down her face as she felt like everything was getting too much for her and she didn’t know what to do. She hated her new job already and she even started to hate Mike. She didn’t want to be treated the way that Mike had been treating her all day; she wanted everything to go back to normal. The sound of her tears lulled her to sleep, as she feared even more, Mike by his new found addiction for corruption and drugs. She didn’t want tomorrow to come.

 

****

[FireHawk]

Monday

 

It was about 10 A.M. when Justin got around. He noticed Sarah wasn’t there but figured she headed back to her apartment. He decided he would check his mail and go for a walk. He grabbed his papers he printed two nights ago at the library, so he could post them. Justin walked up to the empty bulletin board, and posted his short message

 

“Needed Drummer And Bassist

Some writing experience preferred but not mandatory

Must be able to play live shows and have the required equipment of their instrument

If you are part of this complex please contact Justin in Room 19

If I am not available please leave message in mailbox

Or call 555-260-3781

Also I accept non complex members please refer them to my phone number.”

 

“Hopefully this works,” Justin said he was determined he would get some calls. He thought he should add he could be found on the rooftop at 10 P.M. every night since that is something he wanted to start doing. He would love to start playing up there at night, maybe like tradition for him. He made sure the paper was posted on every floor. Hugh caught him down by his desk.

“Justin, package for you last night…here”, said Hugh

“Thanks.” Justin didn’t expect it and was unsure of what it was.

“No problem” Hugh grumbled and went back to paper work.

Justin got up to his room, but stopped and walked over and knocked on Sarah’s door. No one was home so he left a note. A loud crash came from the alleyway. “What the hell?” He just shrugged it off. Justin walked over to his door and opened it and threw the package on the ground. He opened it. It was his practice amp he was storing at his cousin’s house along with various other belongings. A note was included.

 

“Hey I have run into some hard times. Don’t worry here is all your stuff. I will write as soon as I can my phone has been deactivated.”

 

First thing Justin could think of is he didn’t want him here. "Oh well," at least he could practice electric guitar now quieter. The Line 6 Spider III Amp was a lot quieter and could get very quit compared to the Mesa Boogie that was used on world tours. Justin walked back out of his apartment and saw Rob going into Sarah’s apartment. He didn’t really want to talk to Sarah around anyone. He wanted to tell her so much about how he felt. He knew Mike wasn’t the one for her. Justin decided head to the roof. He just stood staring out into the distance. He is not sure how long he stood there but it was a long time. He went thought of the time when he started heroin. Sitting in a hotel room with Scott Wieland shooting up. Stone Temple Pilots had always been Zero Life’s idols, and when they got a chance to open up for Wieland’s solo tour they took up the offer without a second thought. Scott and Justin ended up being really good friends early into the tour. Everything went downhill because of the heroin. After, the second to last show Scott and Justin sat in a room after a party. Both snorting amounts of cocaine addicts normally wouldn’t touch. They were flying high. They decided to counter it so they could sober up with heroin since it is a depressant. They kept shooting over and over. Eventually Justin started throwing up and passed out. Scott was barely able to walk. Adriane happened to open up the hotel room that was still cracked open. She saw the horrible state Scott was in and Justin on the floor. She panicked and called 911. Scott ducked out in another room with Zero Life’s live engineer. Justin was rushed to the hospital. All of Zero Life and Wieland’s touring band sat in the ER lobby waiting to see what was happening. At 11:57 P.M. Justin flat lined. The whole ER room rushed his now dead body. Adrenaline was shot into him. 11:58 P.M. it wasn’t enough. More was put into his body. 11:59 P.M, he came back for about 30 seconds and flat lined, again. Midnight the next day, an amazing thing happened and he stabilized. The doctor’s later told them they thought it was sign of a new day for him. Zero Life had to perform the next day without Justin. The only time they ever played without an original member. From there the next year was all downhill for the band.

 

“I have to sober up,” Justin whispered. He knew if he ever had a chance with Sarah in a serious relationship he had to quit the cocaine. He was still an addict, but he was a cautious one. Justin hurried down to his apartment. He grabbed the rest of his cocaine and the last joint he had left and went back to the roof. He threw them down in the alley. It was over, he thought.

Justin went down and grabbed his keys and put gun in gun holster on inside of his jacket. This reminded him he had to renew his concealed weapon licenses soon. He was surprised how quickly the day went. He walked to his car in the night and heard a voice behind him.

 

“Hey asshole,” Justin turned around to see Mike.

“Hey, you all right man you look kind of fucked up.” Said Justin thinking Mike had to be stoned.

“I am fine unlike you are going to be.”

“Mike, man what the, what the fuck?”

“I know Sarah went with you the other night to your apartment.”

“Hey man, we didn’t do shit. She just told me you guys weren’t doing good” ,Justin said trying to reason.

“Fuck you, you fucked the whore didn’t you?” Mike was getting closer and closer to Justin.

“Dude, no man I respect her and your relationship.”

Mike pulled a gun on Justin. “I know your past. You were a rock star your probably had sex with anyone you wanted and still do.”

“With most chics yeah, but not Sarah”, said Justin worried.

“Oh, yeah?” Mike said sarcastically.

Justin pulled his gun. He knew is 9MM couldn’t stand up to the .50 cal bullet in the Desert Eagle.

“You’re brave pulling out that little gun.” Mike said with a smile.

“Maybe” Justin said smirked like he did in these situations. He always smiled when he was scared, happy, thinking of something devious, nervous, and some time just randomly. “Or maybe you are foolish for pulling that gun on me.”

Mike got the gun ready to fire. Justin looked at the barrel pointed at his forehead without fear.

“You ready to die Justin?”

“I’ve died before,” Justin smirked cause he knew something that Mike didn’t.

“You’re about to again, you...”

“How you know I won’t pull this trigger Mike?” Justin said interrupting.

“Shut up, ” he yelled.

Justin put his gun down. “Fuck you.”

“What? Your scared to shoot me?”

“No, you won’t pull that trigger, and even if you didn’t it wouldn’t matter. I have no friends or family anymore. I have nothing to live. I know you won’t pull it. Even if you do that 1% chance I think you might pull it. I have nothing to lose, unlike you. If I killed you it would hurt Sarah too much. That’s the only reason I won’t pull the trigger on your sorry con artist ass.”, Justin turned away.

Mike sat there holding his gun, pointing it between the cold eyes of Justin.

Justin turned around got in his car, and started it and drove away. Mike just stood there watching the car drive away gun still pointing. “Next time, he won’t get lucky, and get me caught up in thoughts.” Mike sent a random shot in the air.

[Ravynlee]

Monday.

 

The first thing Rob thought, when he stood looking down over the body of Mike’s former work colleague was ‘Vincent.’

It was reflex more than fear, having run from town to town, state to state, feeling this great dark cloud constantly brewing at his back thanks to Ravyn’s misgivings. But part of him hoped, or wanted to hope, he was wrong. Up til that moment in time Vince had been nothing more than a word to him. Staring down over the pallid corpse of a woman he’d never met, Rob felt a shudder rip through him like an icy hand caressing his spine. He didn’t like this. Whoever had done it, why ever they’d done it, meant little in those frantic moments in time. Sarah, who had found the body and had called him over, was looking to him for guidance. But all Rob could do initially was panic.

“But if we call the cops…the sexual harassment claims…and the apparent bullshit about the bashings are in the air…what do we do Rob? Do we hide her?”

Rob nodded. As much as he knew in the back of his mind tampering with a body and crime scene was a punishable offence Rob was more worried about Ravyn finding out. It didn’t necessarily matter who the murderer was Ravyn would always jump to the same conclusion. He couldn't afford to see her regress back into her lowest state, no, in truth, he didn’t want anymore of her blood figuratively on his hands. Together he and Sarah had hefted the body off the roof and after quick consideration wound up at Sarah’s apartment. Rob didn’t want to go home and face the Spanish Inquisition just yet, besides, he knew he was still too shaken up to think straight. He could feel his hands shaking as he joined Sarah on the sofa. She was reading a note in her hands. The name at the bottom said ‘Justin.’ Rob frowned dubiously remembering the sounds he had last night in the corridor outside his apartment. Sarah was having an affair and the knowledge of it left him feeling anxious. Whether it was residual shock from what they had done outside or the adrenalin it triggered now coursing through his system Rob couldn’t stop himself from blurting out what he had been thinking.

“But aren’t you still with Mike?”

Sarah looked forlorn. No, she looked anxious too. Oh God, Rob thought with an internal scoff, I know that look she’s wearing; I see it all the time on a daily basis, Sarah’s scared of me. Then he stopped. There were footsteps out in the hall. Sarah shrugged at the note in her hands.

“Things are going downhill between us,” she said.

Rob sat looking about uneasily. The memory of that body upstairs, the smell of fresh blood, the sound of Sarah’s voice last night in the hall, the note in her hands, all made the big man’s heart pound harder. He knew he should have said something to console her but couldn’t, she was after all his Boss’s other half, and yet… Hearing his name being called out in the corridor Rob’s attention was stolen as he sat up and realised it was Mike calling his name. The same Mike who had been missing since last night and who’s work colleague, who had slapped a sexual harassment suit upon him and cost him his job before she ended up like some human pincushion on the roof, was calling his name. And here he sat with Mike’s philandering and unfaithful fiancé. Rob swallowed loudly. This was not good. He stood watching Sarah let him in to the apartment and Mike’s appearance left them both momentarily lost for words. Mike said something but Rob couldn’t hear it. His instinctual reaction to get as far away from this madness had him heading for the door. He rushed down the stairs and strode down the street checking over his shoulder as if expecting Mike to follow. He had no idea where Mike had been or what had happened to him but the fact he looked messed up, and the fact his former colleague had been found mutilated, left Rob fearful that not only was Mike responsible but that he had used Sarah to help him conceal it. Scrunching his face up bitterly Rob shoved his fists in his hip pockets and quickened his pace towards the café where Ravyn worked. For the first real time since this whole ordeal happened he was beginning to understand what real paranoia felt like. He didn’t like it one bit. He was starting to formulate a newfound respect for his girlfriend’s attitude lately, he thought. If he was smart he would grab her, race over to the nearest bus station, and just leave. But he was getting tired of that and he was getting tired of living on the Lam altogether. They couldn’t keep running. Besides, he thought to himself, if Vincent had been sending the message then there was really no point running anyway, he already knew. Hurrying away from Gethsemane Apartments Rob didn’t look back trying to mentally process his out-of-control thoughts. Was his new boss a killer or was he completely off base? Rob smiled and held and kissed his girlfriend like nothing had happened having decided for the moment to just play it by ear. He would worry for the both of them, he thought, and lead her back home without saying so much as a word.

 

 

“Yeah fucking right and I’m the Queen of England, stop fucking thinking I’m so fucking stupid Sarah!”

It was afternoon and the yelling next door had Ravyn frowning at the wall anxiously. She looked like she was ready to burst into tears. Looking over from the TV set Rob sighed. Ravyn nearly jumped out of her skin when he bumped her.

“Hey-”

“Oh-god-just…” Ravyn said, clutching her chest. She did that a lot when she was nervy. Rob cocked a brow as he raised the volume a fraction.

“Must be the day for it,” he murmured.

A door slammed and again Ravyn reacted. She apologised and got to her feet. Ravyn didn’t like feeling like this but hearing that level of confrontation brought back too many memories for her. She excused herself to the bathroom and locked herself in under the pretence of a shower. It was, and had always been, the best temporary solution to barricading herself away from her problems.

When she came out some three quarters of an hour later Rob was gone. He had called through the door to let her know he had things to do but Ravyn had said anything to simply have him go. She cried to herself alone in the shower because at least in here no one could ask questions. Depression was a cruel mistress coming and going and leaving her lost and despondent in its wake. She towelled down and change her clothes and went out to the kitchen to fix herself something to eat. She didn’t like sex but chocolate she couldn’t go a day without.

Now that she was alone Ravyn settled across the sofa relishing in total isolation and allowing herself to wind down and let all the muscles that had been frozen rigid with fear from the yelling to let go and relax. The sound of music filled the apartment. Ah Plush by the Stone Temple Pilots. She loved this song. Humming along to herself Ravyn dozed, waking intermittently to some music special playing on the TV. She smiled thinking that guy with the blonde hair and strange smile looked familiar but she didn’t really recognise the name Zero Life. Maybe she was imagining things, she wondered. She was a basketcase after all, or so everyone had her believing.

Then she heard a knock on the door. She froze against the cushions. She knew Rob would have called out before this so she didn’t panic. Again came the knocking, again she didn’t respond. Thinking if she lay still enough whomever it was would go away Ravyn waited, a human statue, poised on the couch. She craned her head to peer around the arm rest. The remote fell to the floorboards with a clatter. Ravyn swore.

“Hello? Are- is anybody in there?” a voice beckoned.

Ravyn pulled herself up thinking it wasn’t a male’s voice. Dubiously she made her way to the door. She thought twice about putting an eye to the peephole. She had visions of craning up on her tip-toes to squint through only to find herself staring down the barrel of a loaded Glock. Hearing the imaginary explosion of a bullet searing into her eye socket Ravyn gasped and back peddled. She looked around for her stragelically placed weapons. It was reflex of course, she well knew Vincent wouldn’t knock, he was big enough to kick or shoulder a locked door in, but Ravyn knew how much the ex army-trained cop enjoyed mind games. Cursing her insecurities Ravyn peered through the hole anyway not relieved to see a little old woman on the other side look upset before she turned away. Ravyn slid back the chain lock then froze on sheer impulse. What of he's out there with his back to the wall, using the little old lady as bait she panicked. But the door was now open. It didn’t slam into her face. There was no low malicious laughter, no chaos, no handgun, as Ravyn padded out and put her head around the door. The corridor was clear and the little old lady was wandering away.

“I’m sorry, can I – help you?” she called out.

The old lady shuffled on, obviously hard of hearing. She stopped a few steps away and squinted up at the door now in front of her. She knocked. Ravyn strolled over to meet her. She was short, round, with white grey hair, and heavy lines on her face that reminded Ravyn of aged and stressed leather. She clutched a cat in her arms. It sat anxious, clawing at the old woman’s peacock blue coloured dress. Houdini the name tag read. Ravyn reached out to pet it’s fur gently.

“Oh hello-” the woman said, startled.

Ravyn smiled back at her. She was glad she wasn’t the only one feeling anxious in such gloomy surroundings.

“I didn’t see you there. Is this your cat, dear? I live down on the first floor, room 5. I was just bringing in the groceries and he wandered into my room. Damn near gave me a fright. At my age, you can’t be too careful now can you?”

“No,” Ravyn said.

She was starting to relax until her eyes wandered across to door 21. Ravyn’s smile fell away. The old lady said something about being told the cat’s owners lived up here on the third floor. Ravyn shook her head and refocussed her attentions. She told them that the young couple that lived here were away on holidays. Jos and Brad there names were, or something like that. She cursed Rob's propensity to mutter when he wasn't fully paying attention. As far as she was aware Ravyn explained, no one on this floor owned a pet, much to her disappointment. Hugh’s spiel about animals being too messy for his apartments made Ravyn roll her eyes, but she was glad at the same time that she didn’t have any. She couldn’t afford to give Vince one more thing to torture as he had done her. Still, Hugh might be just as nasty once his injuries were healed and he could kick again without the use of that cane, she thought. It was best to leave animals out of it, for now at least.

The old lady introduced herself as Olivia. Ravyn shook her hand, or her fingers extended out from around the cat’s writhing form, and the two woman exchanged the usual pleasantries.

“Nice to meet you. I'm Rachel,” she said. Then caught herself cringing. “I meant Ravyn, call me Ravyn.”

“Like the big black bird,” the woman smiled. Ravyn stared at her yellow teeth. She nodded agreeably. “Why you don’t look like a bird, dear, and if you don’t mind me saying you’re certainly too pale to be black. I don’t know; this new generation and all their fancy hippy names…”

Ravyn chuckled along with her cheeks surprisingly rosy, feeling her body relax far easier around this strange little woman than a bar of chocolate and a half hour’s catnap on a sofa could ever do. Then she felt her eyes dampen beneath her wise old gaze. It was like Olivia was reading her like an open book but Ravyn had no way of knowing whether it was the dusky light from the other side of the hall shining off her cataracts or just plain old senility. She wrapped her arms about herself and lowered her head. You think I’m pale now but you haven’t seen what I look like with black bruises all over me, she thought. She looked up at the cats meowing. She scratched behind its fluffy ear.

“I think I might know where this little one belongs,” she said.

She explained that she saw a cat downstairs on the second floor a few days ago when some young woman had been redecorating. She remembered seeing blue paint and had exclaimed to Rob they should try renovating something similar. His argument that they wouldn't be here long enough, or moreover it would be too bright for his sterile and ikea loving sensibilites, cut that idea in the bud with typical enthusiasm. Men, she snorted.

"Would you like a cup of tea dear? I just bought some down the street and I just baked some lovely cookies yesterday. Come on, my treat, don't worry about that, we won't be that far away," Olivia said, noticing the way Ravyn looked back at her apartment door warily. "The Super can let you back in if your husband's not back by then. What a nice looking specimen, isn't he? That one's a catch, if I do say so myself. Oh if I wasn't so old and the hip wasn't so bad I tell you I'd-"

"Uh, okay," Ravyn intercepted to halt that comment, and it's associated thoughts, from progressing, "but just for a little while."

"Good, good," Olivia said, before she started wandering down memory lane with the cat struggling frantically in her arms. Petting its head Ravyn drew her door to a close and made her way downstairs with the old lady, revelling in anonymity and new company for the rest of the afternoon.

 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Note: I deliberately "skipped" the night post as it was something and I Pete were going to work on together, if time allows. If not, doesn't matter. Will 'rationalise' the night before (this night) should I need to next post

[Peterdea]

MONDAY (AKA PETERDEA DAY 5)

 

I invited my ex girlfriend Giselle around for a while, she was in the area so why not? I could… Well you know… Kill her!

I told her I wanted to sit and watch the starts with her on the roof for the hell of it. She actually agreed to show which surprised me.

Truth is, I never really loved her. In fact never until recently had I really loved anyone. It was all lies just so that I would fit in a lot better wherever I lived.

Anyway she got there, I talked to her, she tried to get with me, but I couldn’t help myself. Sex isn’t something I want or need right now. So taking her life will do just as well! Hahaha!

After the kill I went home and Stephen was there. He was heating up some pizza and stealing my beer. Bastard. Anyway, we pretty much got drunk and passed out.

 

I woke up extremely early this morning. It was about 5:00 AM that I got up, I was tired and I couldn’t get back to sleep. I lay in bed for about 5 minutes, not doing anything except for thinking. About my future, both as far goes the gang and the girl who I have been chasing the last few days.

Suddenly I realized to myself… It’s quite right now,which is something that never happens here. No matter what time you’re here there is some noise to be heard. But at that point in time, it was completely silent.

I decided to get up and have breakfast, something I hadn’t been able to do properly in a long time. I walked out of my bedroom and looked around.

I don’t remember leaving the place like this! I thought to myself. I walked through empty beer cans and pizza boxes that covered the floor. This is too strange! I waded through the last of the cans and boxes and opened my cupboard. I heard a noise, kind of like a choking sound from behind me. I turned around and saw a pale man walking towards me, slowly limping towards me.

“Are you okay?” I asked him. But he didn’t respond, instead he just continued to approach me. Slowly. He got near to me and I saw he was covered with blood, which for some reason I didn’t notice before.

“You okay?” I asked him again. He fell towards me and started to attack me. I threw him off and ran towards the door to my apartment. I ran as fast as I could through the cans and boxes, but tripped over on my way to the door. My ankle hurt pretty bad. I could see the man was edging towards me, slowly coming through the crap on the floor. I was scared, which was odd for me, and funny since I’m not afraid of death in any way shape or form. The man got close to me and he leaned forward to grab me. I kicked him off with all the force I had which fucked my foot up meaning my ankle and foot were both screwed. He fell down but got straight back up. I crawled backwards towards the door at the same speed he was charging at me with. I got to the door and looked at it. What the hell is going on? I thought. There were boards over the door. I was trapped in here with him. Oh Jesus I’m going to die here! That never seemed like a me thing to think, but for some reason…

I turned back around to face the man, now there were heaps of men. Crowded in my small apartment and all charging at me slowly. They got closer, and closer… And closer until…

…I woke up on the floor of my apartment letting out a small, scared scream as I sat up. I looked at the clock, 7:30AM! Steph was watching me and he was pissing himself laughing.

“You shoulda heard yourself mate!” He laughed.

“Huh?” I said sounding confused.

“You okay? Argh! AHHH!” He teased me. “Sounded like there was snakes on your plane!”

“Yeah shut up asshole…” I mumbled.

“Look thanks for all the pizza and booze, I gotta go mate. Catch ya later!” He said as he headed towards the door.

“Catch!” I replied as he walked out shutting the door behind him. “Prick…”

 

Suddenly I heard a knock at the door. At 9AM I can’t say I wasn’t expecting a visitor. More of the Jehovah’s Witness kind of person not what I got. I walked over to the door and opened it. Standing there was a tall Aussie fella with a mullet.

“G’day mate ma names Durling. I’as jus’ wundin if ya were innerested in joinin a aussie rewels footy team!” He asked me.

“Oh… Cool I suppose!” I said.

“Ahh mate! Yoora Aussie to eh mayte?” He asked me even though he knew the answer.

“Yeah, I go for… Geelong… Mate…” I said.

“At loyst ya dun go fa faggen Carltn! Just soin ere mayte!” I signed the paper and sent him no his way as fast as I could. I can’t stand bogans. Not only because they annoy me, but I feel bad to kill them for some reason. Probably because htye make me laugh when they try to say “Dickhead…”

 

At about 11:30 I heard a loud bang sound like something hitting the ground hard in the alley way. I was going for a short walk when I heard it and decided not to react other then when I heard it. Paranoia took over, I got the feeling someone had discovered my work of that morning.

I somehow let out a quick “What the fuck was that?” then to try cover my suspiciousness I added “Meh, probably a stupid cat”

 

Ah man that was a weird AM for me. Usualy it’s almost routine. But holy crap, a night terror and a freaking bogan! On top of that a friend leaving me and watching me roll around shitting myself while the night terror rolled on. Horrible!

 

The PMs we’re a bit more… Well to my liking. Moslty because I talked a little more to Celeste. Of course I don’t any progress was made. But I did learn a little bit as goes her relationships….

 

“So what do you do with yourself Pete?” She asked me.

“Nothing at the moment, I’m kinda loaded for cash so, y-yeah.” I cut off. Silly me. “How about you?”

“I’m currently working for a small business run by my family, we pretty much sell a bunch of random stuff.” She said with a smile.

“Y’you know Hugh?” I stuttered again. I’m sick of the god damned stutter.

“Yeah, I do…” She seemed uncomfortable… My fault?

“How?” What an idiot…

“Listen I gotta go…” She said after a pause. “see ya round!”

What the hell was that? What’s going on here? If she’s in some sort of trouble maybe I could help her? Oh Christ I have no idea!

 

I spent the rest of the day playing my Wii feeling like a total loser. I wondered if anyone else would end up playing footy with me. I wondered if I would ever get the girl. I wondered what the hell I did wrong…

 

I’m not a very exciting person when I’m not on the job. Super Smash Brothers is my life at the moment. I could tell you about my matches, but who wants to hear about that? Hahaha.

[woodyloveslinkin]

****

 

 

Tuesday.

 

“I walk a lonely road…the only one I have ever known… don’t know where it goes but it’s home to me and I walk alone…”

“No that doesn’t sound right,” said Justin, as Sarah stopped at singing the first verse of Green Day’s Boulevard of Broken Dreams. She stopped with an acoustic guitar in her hands, as she sighed again. She hadn’t played this song for a while and was trying to get back into it. She thought of how Justin channelled his emotions into music, maybe she could do the same thing as she was mainly pathetic at everything else. She couldn’t write a decent story even if someone held her at gun point. Justin smiled at her, as she couldn’t help but to smell the flirtatious scent of a blooming crush in the air. It was about eleven now in the morning and Sarah hadn’t seen Mike this morning. She didn’t even think that Mike had even come back from his late night walking trip. She had a shower, got changed, said a short hi to Rob who looked like he had something important to do and went and paid Justin a visit. Justin frowned as Sarah thought that he was deep in thought about something. “Change it to a C minor. Just before I walk alone, okay?” Sarah nodded, as she tried again. She repositioned her fingers along the frets and on the strings.

“I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known, don’t know where it goes but it’s home to me and I walk alone,”

“Good,” she heard him whisper.

“I walk this empty street on the boulevard of broken dreams wheres the city sleeps and I’m the only one that walks alone, I walk alone…”

“How long has it been since you’ve played?” asked Justin, as Sarah stopped playing the black acoustic guitar which belonged in the beginning wasn’t hers, but it was Mike’s and he had it stashed away in the cupboard for about a week now.

“A fair while, that’s how I kinda met Mike, at an acoustic festival in Memphis a couple of years ago,” answered Sarah, a bit quiet as one of the reasons why she came to Justin’s place was to get away from the scent of Mike and the mess that he had been leaving around the house.

“Wanna start again, or do you want to continue?” asked Justin. “You know I didn’t advertise for acoustics, drummers, and bassists I asked for.”

“What? I’m not good enough for you?” asked Sarah, smiling a bit, like a little teenager girl. She wasn’t here to for the band idea; she just wanted to not drink herself stupid, like Rob had kindly pointed out to her.

“You’re too good to be with Mike,” Justin looked like he had said that by accident but Sarah wasn’t sure. Justin closed his eyes and shook his head. “I’m sorry I didn’t say that, I mean, I didn’t mean it when I said it.” Sarah nodded slowly, not knowing what to say or what to think. She started to have feelings for not Justin and she could tell that he liked her a lot. Even before that one comment about her not deserving to be with Mike just then, she knew he liked her a lot. But she liked someone else. But he was like forbidden fruit to her right now and she was forbidden fruit still in its tree. She just didn’t want to be Eve to pick his fruit. He opened his eyes, as she was sitting against the wall in his lounge room and he was sitting opposite her. She held the blue pick firmly in her grip. “Continue where were we again? Ah yes, D minor on chorus. Go nuts.”

“My shadow's the only one that walks beside me, my shallow heart's the only thing that's beating… sometimes I wish someone out there will find me, 'til then I walk alone,”

“You’re a good singer, and at the same time a good acoustic player,” complimented Justin, as someone on the other side of the door started to knock. “I know who that’ll be.”

“Who?” asked Sarah. “I hope Mike hasn’t found out where I am. He’s bound to send me back from where I come from or something like that.”

“Doubt it, unless you left behind a trail of lies behind you,” replied Justin, getting to his feet and answering the door. While Justin was busy talking to who seemed to be Hugh on the other end of the conversation, Sarah got to her feet and looked at the black acoustic guitar. She had a feeling that Mike was going to suddenly appear a couple of doors over in their apartment and she didn’t want to be here if he was going to do something bad to Justin, in which, Sarah had a good feeling that Mike would pull out a gun and shoot him dead just because they were…how did Justin put it once? Jamming. She got to her feet and started to make her way over to the exit. Justin disconnected himself from the conversation and looked to Sarah who was now by his side with Mike’s acoustic still in her grip. “You going? So soon?” Sarah nodded as she avoided eye contact with Hugh. “Oh that’s a pity, Hugh heard your singing and he thought he could’ve heard the rest of the song.”

Sarah turned to face Hugh with a deadly glare. Hugh smirked.

“We can’t always get what we want, pity,” remarked Sarah, as Justin and her farewelled each other and Sarah thought Justin was a bit too upfront with his feelings towards her because he gave her a peck on her cheek, something that Justin had never done before. The closest thing he had gotten out of her was a hug. Sarah walked past Hugh without a further ado and started to make her way out of the building by climbing the stairs and outside on the rooftop. She headed straight for the chairs and sat down on one as the sunshine was at its brightest peak and was shining down on the citizens of the City of the New York Yankees. Sarah cringed as she remembered Mike was a baseball fan and she had been accustomed to think that New York City’s name was that of one that contained the baseball team. She shook her head as she told herself that Mike was going to be another man that would be in and out of her life, just like her previous ex boyfriends had been. She tried to herself to reiterate that point every time she felt down, angry, or upset whenever she felt like she just wanted to pull a knife out from the kitchen’s drawer and stab him with it. She rested the black acoustic on her lap as she put her fingers back on the frets where Justin had left her on and started back up again where she had left off. “I'm walking down the line that divides me somewhere in my mind on the border line, of the edge and where I walk alone…”

“Nice,” commented a woman coming from around the corner behind the door entrance that had been put in the middle of the roof. Sarah was a bit startled by the woman’s appearance, as she came and sat down next to Sarah. The woman had a laptop tucked underneath her arms. Sarah wasn’t sure who she was. “Can you play some more? You’re starting to give me some inspiration.” The woman placed the laptop on her lap and obviously looked eager to hear her voice.

“Ah okay, but wait, do I know you?” asked Sarah, frowned.

“People just call me Nailz,” answered the woman.

“Ah, so like….the nails you put into wood?” asked Sarah. The woman wasn’t impressed by Sarah’s joke.

“With a Z,” she answered blankly, unimpressed. “You’ve got a nice voice.” Sarah rolled her eyes as she felt like she was carrying with her a recording of the same compliment.

“Here’s a little bit, but I guess it’s better than nothing really, it’s not my song, it’s just an old song I used to play a lot when it came out,” Sarah pointed out to Nailz. “Read between the lines what's fucked up and everything's alright, check my vital signs to know I'm still alive and I walk alone. You like?”

“I hate that song,” answered Nailz. “Could never stand it.”

“Oh well, now you have to put up with me playing it, now don’t you?” asked Sarah as she saw Rob come up the stairs. “Do you wanna hear an old song that I knew how to play when I first learnt how to play this?” Nailz nodded.

“What song?” she asked.

“Heart Shaped Box, of course, acoustic, sounds quite shit,” answered Sarah as Nailz nodded again. “I forgot the words but I know the basic tabs to it.” Nailz nodded again. Sarah’s fingers plucked and strummed various strings as she moved her fingers up and down the frets of the guitar. Nailz nodded her head to the soft acoustic sound. Both of the women knew the tune and hummed the words, but didn’t actually know them. When Sarah finished she looked at the time. They had done this for several hours, just chatting and laughing about various things. Nailz complimented Sarah several times on her newly rediscovered talent. Sarah always replied with a smile.

It was now 3 pm and the brightness of the light was starting to dull across the New York landscape.

“Are you in a band or something?” asked Nailz. Sarah shook her head.

“Just doing it for fun, that’s all, trying to find something to channel all of my anger into something that doesn’t involve alcohol and hangovers,” answered Sarah, as she saw Rob in the corner of her eye. She smiled faintly as she turned to Nailz. “Got to go now, but thanks for the listen, I do appreciate that some people that think I sound okay, without being pulled up on the littlest of things.” She got to her feet with the guitar still in her hands.

“I heard you singing from outside my window, what song was it?” he asked.

“Which one?” asked Sarah as she walked over to Rob and smiled. Rob surveyed the guitar and looked impressed. “You like?”

“Very much, fine piece of shit that looks like,” answered Rob. Sarah and Rob reconnected their eye contact. “You working with Rave tonight?”

“Nope, didn’t even know she was working tonight, I thought she had this morning’s shift, yet again,” answered Sarah, trying to remember what the roster on the back of the kitchen’s door that led into the very back of the restaurant, where the supplies were stored. She didn’t know what Rob was talking about. “I’ve got the night off apparently. That’s up until they call me at nine or so to come in to close.”

“She said that she had to double up because she said someone called Rebecca had just gone on maternity leave or something and now she’s got double shift when you’re not on,” Rob frowned as Sarah looked clueless. “You know Rebecca right, don’t you?” Sarah nodded. “Is she on maternity leave?”

“Hell no, she’s flat as a surfboard, and she’s still working,” laughed Sarah. “This is bullshit. She’s lying to you Rob…she’s not on tonight, ah, Yasmine’s on tonight instead of me again, that’s if she doesn’t fall over and break her neck or something. Rob’s she’s pulling your leg on this that’s for sure. And I ain’t pulling yours either on this subject.”

“That’s just very odd…” Rob trailed off in his sentence.

“It’s just too odd to be true more sounds like it,” Sarah whispered to herself. “But she’s always been an odd one hasn’t she? Isn’t she like Paranoia Inc. most of the time?”

“She’s got some issues I wish she would just get over,” answered Rob. “Hey what are you doing later tonight, if you’re not going to work tonight?”

“Nothing much, probably going to be dealt shit from Mike, I can’t believe him Rob, he’s doing all this crazy shit that he doesn’t usually do, well, he’s never done it before, he’s turned a bit scary,” explained Sarah. “I’m going to go back to my apartment and probably get this Justin thing out of the way…”

“What was this Justin thing?” asked Rob. “Did you…?” He gave her an accusing look.

“No, we’re only friends, I think it was just a shock that someone cared for me at first, but now I’m over it, seriously, I don’t think he’s the one for me, I think someone else, not Mike, is the one for me,” Sarah tried to explain herself, but Rob was still giving her a weird look, as though there was more to the story than what originally met the eye. “It’s all I’m prepared to tell you right now.”

“Can I ask you a question?” asked Rob.

“Does it have to be here?” asked Sarah, as she realised that Nailz had started to type rapidly on her laptop in her lap. Sarah frowned as she realised that Nailz still had the laptop in her lap and it must’ve been hot or something under the sun. Both women were lucky not to be burnt.

“Then where do you want me to ask it?” asked Rob.

“Come back inside to my apartment, just hope that Mike isn’t home,” answered Sarah. It was a couple of minutes until Sarah reached the empty apartment and let Rob through the front door. Sarah saw that Rob made himself comfortable by sitting down on the couch and stretching out on the couch. Just like how Mike used to do it. “You like the apartment?”

“I would like it more if she wasn’t complaining and whinging half the time,” answered Rob, completely missing the question. “Damn, now that I think of it. I think Hugh wants to do an inspection or something of our apartments. Or so I’ve been hearing it around the place.” Sarah smirked for a second as she realised that she was originally thinking about whether Rob liked her apartment, but she was happy with his response.

It was coming, the verbal vomit, as Sarah remembered the note that was left underneath the door. It was slowly coming her theory about Mike and Rob’s girlfriend…she started to walk towards Rob to try and ease off the verbal vomit. But no. It couldn’t have been prevented.

“Rob I think Ravyn is cheating on you with Mike,” Sarah blurted out, as she stopped in her tracks as Rob looked like his world had just been turned upside down.

“Wha....t?” asked Rob looking stunned. “No. You’ve got it all wrong. Not after what she said to me about him. Wait…that was just her being paranoid…paranoia makes people do stupid things…so why would paranoia lead to her sleeping with a man…but she’s never told me that…I don’t know what the hell I’m thinking! Are you sure? Are you really sure, Sarah?”

“There was a note left underneath the door the other night when I came back from work, and it said thank you for the night, no name left, no nothing and I don’t think you would write such a love-letter stylised letter to Mike, cos I was with no one that night, I was at work,” Sarah tried to explain to Rob. Well, it was half-true. Pete was busy chatting her up but how did Pete know where she lived? They had only ran into each other on the streets and was it just a strange coincidence that they lived in the same apartment complex and never saw each other around? “I think, and I stress the word, think, I think she’s cheating on you…would explain a lot, I mean, she lied to you about going to work tonight and Mike hasn’t been home, well, on and off…”

Rob got up from his seat, as Sarah lent the guitar against a nearby wall. Rob walked over to Sarah and sighed as he stopped in front of her and looked into her blue eyes.

“Are you scared of me?” asked Rob. “Honestly, are you scared of me?”

“I know where this is going, but you’re like forbidden fruit to me right now, and I don’t want to end up in a mess, like I am right now, that’s if you’re thinking, I didn’t want any part of this to start with,” answered Sarah, as Rob frowned. “You’re talking about Mike’s business aren’t you?” Rob shook his head. Sarah thought he was starting off a threat before with all the questions. Like how the Hollywood actors do it on the big screen. “Oh. Like as in, am I scared of you on a personal level?” Rob nodded. “No, not really. I’m just naturally hesitate. I’m sorry if that annoys or confuses you, it’s just me.”

“Why hasn’t Mike been home lately, Sarah?” asked Rob, looking sternly at Sarah. “And why are you so suddenly jumpy? Is there something you’re not telling me?”

“You’ve got to promise you won’t say a word to anyone, especially that woman of yours, she has a mouth set on her, you promise you won’t tell?” asked Sarah. Rob nodded. Sarah whispered something in his ears that made Rob’s eyes light up. Sarah withdrew from whispering in his ear. “You promised not to tell. Remember?” Rob nodded.

“Wow, I’m stunned, I…feel for you now even more…” Rob stumbled to find his words, as Sarah frowned at the words even more. “What?” Rob had obviously noticed Sarah’s frown.

“What do you mean…even more?” asked Sarah. “You cared for me to start with? What? I thought you thought I was some psychotic bitch or so that’s what I thought at that time.”

“Well, that was the impression you gave us both when you first arrived, not a very good one by the way,” Rob remembered. “Look, in the past week or so I’ve grown to…like you, a lot. I know what you’re going to say, you’re not going to touch me because you have Mike and that you love Mike and all. But you deserve better and I deserve better don’t I?” Sarah thought about what he had just said. She knew that he was the guy that she had grown to like, a lot, but it didn’t seem to fit in right with everything. “Don’t worry about Rave, we’ll sort something out with her later. I just want you to know that I really do care about you in more than a friend way…if you get my general gist…” Sarah smiled as Rob smiled at her smiling as a response to what he had just said, or so, Sarah assumed that was the reason why he was smiling.

“I get it alright,” Sarah smiled as she caught her drift and threw her arms around him.

Sarah went to bed that night at an early bed time at seven, not alone, and not with Mike, for Sarah didn’t know but Mike was off in another part of town with a bunch of other men. The man that now had made her feel so special and gooey inside laid asleep next to her, as it was just past nine o’clock. Now going to bed and going to sleep were two different things and that was something that Sarah had just had a lesson in telling the difference between the two terms. Sarah swore she heard his girlfriend go to the front of their front door, the door which belonged to Mike and Sarah, not sure if she was crying or not but she was sure that his girlfriend was asking for her Rob. Sarah ignored the weeping woman, like he had said before, they both deserved better. Now that Sarah had convinced him that his girlfriend was cheating on him, she was happy, as she rolled over and hugged Rob.

 

 

****

[FireHawk]

Tuesday

 

1 A.M.

Justin returned home. He had just driven to see his dead parents. Huntersburg, Pennsylvania. A small private aircraft carrying them from Fort Wayne, Indiana to Boston went down. They were on their way to see Zero Life. It was toward the beginning of their first ever headlining tour. It had been 3 years. Justin remembered getting the news moments before the opening band took the stage. He went into shock, everyone tried to get him to leave, but he sat there and cried for a half hour. The openers were still playing when Justin decided he would play a few songs. He remembered walking out with the singer, Brandon. Brandon sat down with an acoustic guitar and Justin sat to his immediate left.

“Ladies and gentleman, my parents just died,” he said with tears in his eyes, “I don’t know what the fuck to do, it’s out of my hands so we are going to play a few songs.” The crowed gave applause. “I hope you don’t mind if I sing.” The crowd cheered. Justin didn’t feel anything he was so numb. Brandon used his light pick. It was white, and strummed up in down in the cold Boston night. He played the intro. Justin didn’t come in he just sat there. Brandon played again and finally Justin’s voice said with a quiver.

 

“Wha-What else should I be

All apologies”

Everyone in the audience knew he was about to cry. He finally pulled it together at the chorus. Until he got towards the end.

 

“In the sun

I'm married

buried”

After he yelled buried, he about broke out again, but continued singing. He never knew this Nirvana song he learned when he started playing guitar would be this hard for him. He had song it with a high school band. His heart was slowly breaking, but he kept going. He finished the last line and everyone cheered louder than he had ever heard before. He shed a small tear. His mother and father were gone. He was an only child with no parents. 19 and scared, a day earlier he had told his father he was a man and didn’t need to hear what he should or should not be doing, but his dad didn’t hold a grudge and got on the plain Justin had sent them hoping to see the most important thing of his life. Justin’s heart was broken. There was a pause before they started the next time. Good Riddance (Time of Your Life). Justin thought this song was cliché and would denied playing it any other night, but Brandon made the decision, and Justin was so out of it he could been walked off a cliff and felt the same. He thought of how ironic the song was. Since something unpredictable happened, but he kept repeating the words “It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life.” The last song was the only song Justin really wanted to play. It was his parent’s favorite song that he learned to play guitar. He waited for everyone to quite down. Then the guitar came on and everyone got loud again. Then in the strongest he had ever sang “Well momma told me, when I was young, sit beside me, my only son, and listen closely to what I say, and if you do this, it will help you some sunny day. Ahhh, Yeah it will” The acoustic guitar riff kept playing as he waited for his moment for the second verse. He hit it perfect. “Or take your time don't live to fast, Troubles will come and they will pass, You'll find a woman and you'll find love, And don't forget that there's is a someone up above.” Then the chorus came and the crowd sang loud and along. “Be a simple kind of man, Be a something you love and understand, Baby be a simple kind of man, Oh won't you do this for me son if you can.” He went through the whole song with the strongest voice he had ever had. The crowd was behind him 100 percent. Then at the end he said the closing words after the guitar dropped out “Oh won't you do this for me son if you can.” He got up and walked off the stage without saying a word to the wild crowd chanting “JUSTIN! JUSTIN!” He walked backstage through all the gear that was set up for what was supposed to be one of their biggest shows of the time. As he walked past Adriane and Jacob, the drummer, he heard Brandon’s voice with a loud echo “Thank you all, Justin is in a lot of pain and you all helped. Please keep your ticket stubs, when plan on making it up to you. Good night.” The crowd was loud they started singing “Simple Man” again. Later after the band broke up his version of Simple Man was on the DVD “Zero Life: The Greatest Hits Live.” He played the song every year on the anniversary of their death.

 

 

Today was that day. He walked into his room and cried some more. He was always close to his parents. He grabbed the acoustic guitar to head to the roof it was 2:00 A.M. He sat up there and played the song. His eyes were waterfalls of the Amazon. He got up and walked to his apartment sobbing the whole way. In a way he thought he was weak, but in another he didn’t care. Maybe that was the reason he told Mike to shoot him last night. He decided it would be best to get some sleep his furniture would arrive the next morning.

 

Justin woke up at 9 A.M. and got in the shower and dressed. 9:30 he headed down and met the moving people he helped get the furniture in his room. He hooked up the electronics. “Wow I wasted a lot of money”, he said to himself as the moving people left. He figured he probably did have the nicest room though now. He wondered if Sarah would be impressed, but didn’t think she was like the normal people Justin would go after just to sleep with. They just went for him because they thought he was still rich. He wanted a relationship, but mostly save her from Mike. He seemed like a terrible guy. Justin knew Mike had to be involved in gang activity and wondered if Rob and Ravyn were involved. At least here his life was getting action compared to the boring self regret he was living. He also wondered why Jon had not contacted him again, but figured maybe he was doing stuff more important than jamming with a 21 year old with no life.

 

Sarah came over, a surprising move Justin thought. She had a guitar, and Justin listened to her play “Boulevard of Broken Dreams”, he kept correcting her. He didn’t think till later it might have been annoying. He helped her play music until Hugh came over. Sarah then left making Justin think that she felt awkward with Justin around other people. As she soon as she left he lost all focus, and he could only think of the event 3 years ago. Justin decided to open up a photo album to change his attention. He went through the Zero Life stuff smiling at the past he wished he had. Then he made a mistake and got to his family photos he looked for a long time. He cried and cried. He thought it was stupid he was an adult he should be over it. He hadn’t been to Boston since the accident. Every July 15th was like this for him. Justin didn’t do much that day. The rest of his day was just him thinking. He didn’t write a single lyric or any music. At 10 PM he went up on the roof and played “Simple Man” again. On his way down his saw Mike leaving down the steps. Mike didn’t see him. Justin decided this is when he was going to tell Sarah how he felt about everything from what he thought about Mike and Justin’s feelings for her. He walked over to Sarah’s apartment door and knocked on the cold wooden door. She looked sad when she opened the door slowly.

 

“Hey” Justin said with a smile.

“H-Hi” she said, not real enthusiastic.

“Look, we need to talk”, Justin said as he rubbed his neck.

 

[Ravynlee]

Warning, long rant and mature content included. This will be covered in two posts. Same day, just a lot of it. You know the drill

 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Tuesday

 

Ravyn sat staring off into space as the sound of conversation continued behind her. Rob was talking in the phone but she didn’t know who he was speaking to, in truth she wasn’t really listening. She blinked down at the cereal in her bowl and fed a spoonful into her mouth. She moved like a robot. She couldn’t even taste it. Just chew and swallow another mouthful, chew and swallow. It was habit, it was routine. She felt safe in routine as she continued eating, putting on the same façade she always did the morning after Vincent had beat or assaulted her. It was the survival instinct kicking back in, using only the most fundamental of actions while everything else just slipped back into the shadows and was ignored. Ravyn wasn’t herself this morning but the look on her face didn’t give it away. She was a consummate actor and had been conditioned to be. She watched Rob return the phone to its cradle out of the corner of her eye and approach, feeling the slightest shift of air on high alert as he passed her without so much as a sideways glance.

“That was Hugh,” he said, as if the conversation had been uncharacteristically burdensome for him. “Something’s come up. He wants me to go… help… There’s mess from some guy in the basement, have to help him like, clean it… I don’t know how long I’ll be so if you go anywhere like… you know.”

Ravyn nodded. She forced a tight smile as she met his eyes across the living room. Pulling a cap atop his head Rob paused as he met hers before he nodded and quickly made his way from the apartment. Ravyn sunk into her seat as the door closed on its hinges. She knew he was lying to her but she didn’t want to think about it. She was pushing him away again; she knew she was, thinking of mere hours ago in bed when they had laid on separate sides of the mattress like relative strangers. For hours neither one of them slept a wink and nor did they speak as she waited for him to initiate some kind of physical reassurance like he always did. But last night Rob had just laid there with his hands tucked away beneath his pillow just staring upwards at the ceiling. Something was troubling him and Ravyn had a fair idea what that something was. They had been here before, too many times in the past, not to see the signs for what they really meant. Rob was pulling away from her just like he always did eventually. And every other time she had let him telling herself she was strong and tough and independent enough to get through life without him, but not anymore. Things had changed. Everything had fucked up.

Staring down at her bowl of half eaten cereal Ravyn saw that her fingers were shaking. She cupped them to her face too late to stifle a sob. Ravyn smeared her eyes of hot tears and looked towards the TV cabinet. The handle of the knife poking out between books beckoned her over. In her head she could practically hear it urging her over to use it. Just one good slice and she could go to sleep and Rob and Vincent and Mike wouldn’t bother her anymore. Swallowing loudly Ravyn closed her eyes, trying to push the memory of last night from her mind.

 

 

(This paragraph that follows is a flashback - I place this some time while sarah was at work, before he goes out after this to probably get smashed and have his war of words with Justin. Make sense?)

 

“You better run along home so your man doesn’t start to worry. Feel free to come back and visit anytime.”

“I will. And thanks again, Olivia.”

“Alright, bye bye dear.”

Closing the door with a smile Ravyn turned and made her way towards the apartment steps hurriedly. She was on a high and her ears were still full of the sound of the old woman’s many past stories. She didn’t hear movement until someone had stepped into stride along side her. It was gloomy beneath the dusty lights but Ravyn knew it was Mike by pure sense alone. She cringed and as she quickened her pace pretending not to have noticed.

“What’s your hurry?” he asked her. He s******ed at her silence as they matched step for step like soldiers on a mission. “Ah that’s right, wouldn’t want to keep that man of yours waiting. My only question is, which man that would be, Rob or Vincent? Hmm I wonder.”

Ravyn faltered and glared at him, despising the smirk he was now wearing. He looked dangerous in the dim light. He s******ed again as if toying with her.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Ravyn said tightly.

She turned the landing and continued up to the top as if her life depended on it. Mike seemed to be floating on a malicious cloud right along side her.

“Oh I think you do. We both do. See, a certain crippled bird told me this story-”

“Leave me alone.”

“-Don’t you want to hear this story? Oh that’s right; you’re in it, stupid me,” Mike chuckled, carrying on regardless. “See it involves this damsel, that’s you, and the knight in shining armour, well, we all know who that is, right? Anyway lets just say the damsel has her distress, as all damsels in these stories do, and the knight charges in and saves the day, and he whisks her off to his castle for the happily ever after. Only there’s a monster. He’s the monster. See it turns out he wasn’t the hero but he was the monster all along, and the damsel well, she panics of course, and she comes across this other knight and- well you get the picture-”

“Please- what do you want?”

“I just want to talk, Rave, Ravyn, Rachel, that is your name, isn’t it?”

Hearing it Ravyn’s step faltered as she stopped mere metres from her door and faced him. A hollow sickness overcome her reflected in her hot wet eyes that only moments ago had been so alive with tears of happiness. Mike’s smile grew as he approached her seeming to know with cold delight that the relevant buttons had been pushed. He even chuckled under his breath with a modicum of pride, as if saying to himself, Wow, that had been way too easy.

“See I know more about you than you think,” he said. “If there’s anyone here that’s dangerous it’s you, not me, not this time. I should know.”

Digging into his pocket Mike withdrew something and discreetly held it low for her to see in the palm of his hand. The sight of a gun poking out from the waistband of his pants wasn’t what made her whimper but the flash of gold as Mike scanned the corridor and met her eyes, before he shoved the billfold back into his pocket.

Ravyn felt like someone had just pounded her hard in the back of the head with a block of ice. Mike was a cop? No, she refused to believe it. No. Not that. Anything but that. That didn’t make any sense. He was a criminal… wasn’t he?

“See, you’re what we call a badge bunny,” Mike had said standing closer. “We know all about women like you. You like danger. Say what you want but you like being hurt. You get off on it. You like being dominated by some big guy in a position of authority. And I bet you, when you found out your big friend had a wife and family back home, well, that ruined plans for you didn’t it? You got jealous and you made it your mission to ruin him, and now you come here to ruin things for me, only I’m on to you.”

No, no, no, no-

“See this is my place, and these people here, let’s just say they’re my pet project. This is my retirement fund right here, my cash cow, and I don’t appreciate the idea of some crazy bitch using my turf to play hide and seek from the long arm of the law,” Mike said.

He was practically standing against her intimately but Ravyn couldn’t react aside from blinking and breathing – if just barely. He was still speaking to her but all she caught now were fragments, feeling his breath and his words and his body heat uncomfortably close like a lover; Abysmal pay… years in the making…earning their trust… chance of a lifetime. Never in a million years had it occurred to her that her foul mouthed, drunken, spouse-abusing neighbour had been a card carrying member of the NYPD, he was meant to arrest people like that, only who knew better than she how blurry that line between right and wrong truly was. Hasn’t Vincent been exactly the same beneath the façade? Mike’s scam she had thought only went so far as making up bogus insurance claims, at best maybe with links to some underground crime syndicate. She had no indication that he was ever an instigator in this whole sordid mess, living a double life and walking a fine line in a place where crime was its lifeblood.

Ravyn stood reeling unable to get her head around it. She didn’t know what to believe, or what to think, half heartedly hoping that this was a dream and she was about to wake up safe in bed beside Rob and she was still none the wiser. She wanted to think that that badge had been a fake, a cheap prop from any five-and-dime store and in the dim light it had been hard to tell, but the sight of the gun along side it had Ravyn’s knees and stomach and heart all aquiver. She was thinking of Vincent but all she could see at that moment was Mike. A jagged sob escaped her that made the half Japanese man smile. A moment later he cupped her cheek with his palm and slowly kissed her. Ravyn didn’t return it. Mike hadn’t expected her to.

“See, you’re wrong about me,” he said against her, his voice low as if echoing across oceans, “The only one dangerous here is you. Now you’re going to help me or I tell the world where you are. There won’t be a place on the planet you’ll be able to hide no matter where you run. Vincent’s still out there somewhere, looking for you, for revenge, isn’t he? That’s what I thought…”

Somewhere behind them a door squeaked and closed on its hinges, the guilty party however was nowhere to be seen.

Ravyn returned to her apartment and closed the door securely between them. She didn’t come out of the bathroom for hours, not that it mattered. There was no where she could run to get away from this newest threat to control her life. No longer was she running from a beast that lurked in the shadows from her past anymore, this one was real, he lived right next door, on the other side of that very wall, and his name was Mike Shinoda.

 

 

After breakfast Ravyn stood like a mannequin in the shower again and let the water mask her tears. Her gaze was vacant and focused on nothing as she towelled herself dry and got dressed for work through the mist of steam. Her mind hadn’t adjusted to the confrontation out there in the hall last night and she couldn’t even speak of it. She thought of the badge and she thought of the gun and closed her eyes to get rid of them. When Rob had walked in the door last night after helping Hugh again she could only assume, she had struggled with the need to tell him everything but the words wouldn’t budge from the stranglehold in her throat. Rob had looked at her like he always had forcing that weak smile, uttering his menial conversation that was never much, and after the usual routine of food, TV, and shower had retired to bed keeping his thoughts to himself as much as she did, both of them saying nothing. She was mad at him but she didn’t want to be. For some inexplicable reason, the one person in the world she trusted above all others had blabbed to Hugh about everything and that two-faced old cripple had in turn told this to Mike. The sting of betrayal was painful but she was quick to get over that. She had to keep secrets from him for his own protection and knew that this was just one more she was adding to her repertoire. So Mike wanted her to be his alibi when dealing with Sarah, she would do that, she would do that and everything else he wanted because she simply had to. So far Mike was just a big mouth with a gun but lies or not, it was the only security she had to ensure Vincent didn’t find out where she was and make good with his promise to take back what she had ‘stolen’ from him.

[Ravynlee]

(Tuesday continued)

 

Hearing the sound of music Rob followed it up, drawn like a sailor to a siren out beneath the mid afternoon heat. It must have been about 3 or so and he was physically tired from having moved furniture most of the day, at Hugh’s orders, who wanted to set an example to tenants who moved in then neglected on their duties to pay the rent. Rob wasn’t completely sure throwing everything out on the lawn was legal but he didn’t ask and completed the tasks assigned to him, thinking it was simply better to just go along with the flow rather than try and disrupt its course. He stunk of sweat now as he emerged on the roof to see two women sitting beneath the sun’s cruel rays. One held a laptop and the other was strumming some dented up black acoustic guitar, and they were humming along to a song in unison. It was sweet and a nice change from the angry riffs he usually heard in the halls below him, but he pretended not to notice. He watched them exchange words of parting and found himself suddenly frozen like some stalker as Sarah saw him. He smiled and felt himself panic internally. He could smell her perfume from here and it was driving him crazy.

“I heard you singing from outside my window, what song was it?” he blurted. He wanted to slap himself in the forehead for the smile she was giving him.

“Which one?” she asked. He sought shelter critically eying off her guitar. “You like?”

“Very much, fine piece of shit that looks like,” answered Rob. God damn it, Rob, shut up! He told himself. He blinked up and met her eyes. Why didn’t looking at Ravyn make him feel like that? Say something. She’s looking at you. Rob cleared his throat awkwardly. “Um… You… working with Rave tonight?” he asked. Wow. Way to ruin it, big guy, better luck next time. Idiot.

Sarah gave him a strange look that he had a hard time deciphering. In truth he only caught part of what she said, but the bottom line what he caught was that Ravyn wasn’t meant to be working. She had lied to him. Well maybe she hadn’t lied, maybe she got her days mixed up or she forgot, she was still new, he rationalised, but something didn’t sit right. In the corner of his eye Rob was looking to the space to where that woman’s body had been found and his mind was immediately distracted. Ravyn wasn’t stupid but she was renowned for keeping things from him, whether affection, a smile, or even so much as what she was thinking. This was the woman he had to practically coerce into sex like a kid taking their baby for the first time into water. He talked with Sarah a while longer before conceding that something was very odd with the whole scenario. When the conversation turned to Mike and then Justin Rob found his defences rising.

“We’re only friends," she told him. "I think it was just a shock that someone cared for me at first, but now I’m over it, seriously, I don’t think he’s the one for me, I think someone else, not Mike, is the one for me." Sarah was suddenly all coy in a way he hadn’t seen her before. When she looked up and met his eyes again Rob felt himself swell with bravado.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“Does it have to be here?”

“Then where do you want me to ask it?”

“Come back inside to my apartment,” she said.

Bingo. That was all Rob needed to hear, he didn’t want or need to hear anything else. Following her downstairs away from the other woman’s casual stare Rob was busy formulating a line in case some one, anyone, especially Ravyn happened across them. Even once he was inside he had convinced himself that it was innocent, it was all easily justifiable, completely ignoring this hot feeling coursing through him. Making himself at home on the sofa Rob was excited, so much so he wasn’t really listening still to what Sarah had asked of him. He blurted out his thoughts without much consideration, relieved to no end he could just let his guard down and not have to carefully orchestrate what he was saying. When she told him something about Mike’s affair with Ravyn Rob sat fighting the urge to burst out laughing. That was beyond ridiculous but the look Sarah was giving him made the temperature shift in the room. He was looking around as if recognising for the first time he wasn’t in his apartment and he was literally in some else’s place and he didn’t like this new feeling suddenly coming over him.

“No. You’ve got it all wrong…”

It had to be wrong, Ravyn cringed at intimacy, he couldn’t so much kiss her without begging permission, he thought, and he stopped blabbering and thought about it. Realisation dawned on him like a smack in the face. No, he couldn’t get away with it, but someone else could. Rob scoffed to himself bitterly. Especially someone like Mike, he was after all in some ways a lot like this Vincent guy wasn’t he? Judging by the haunted look he saw on Sarah’s face and having heard the yelling back and forth and the slamming doors Rob didn’t need much convincing that his new employer was probably assaulting his fiancé just as Ravyn had said Vince had done to her. The only difference was Rob was pretty sure Sarah didn’t get wet panties when Mike slapped her. The one time Rob had been too eager and a bit brusque during intercourse with Ravyn back in the early days she had reacted in ways that left Rob feeling mixed up and sullied after ward. He had never done it again and it had always remained like an invisible wedge between them. But standing up now and looking down over Sarah Rob smiled to himself sadly. She was fragile behind the wall she put up, unlike his supposed girlfriend, and Rob was drawn to it, hook, line and sinker.

“Are you scared of me?” he asked, “Honestly, are you scared of me?”

A moment later he held her face between his hands and was kissing her. Together they fell on to the bed that she shared with another but Rob didn’t give so much as a second thought about it. They made love for hours without restraint before Rob, now exhausted; fell onto on his back with the arms of another woman not his partner tangled around him. He was satiated, feeling as if he had been holding his breath for too long and had finally burst to the surface. He didn’t even notice the time let alone hear another sound coming from outside the apartment. Rob fell asleep. He didn’t wake again until late into the evening.

 

 

“Almost done?”

“Yeah,” Ravyn said, counting up her tips. The waitress beside her smiled as she bumped her with her hip, seemingly unaffected by the warning gaze Ravyn suddenly shot her. She nodded towards the window.

“Your boyfriend’s here,” she teased.

Ravyn wanted to punch her. She smirked tightly, coming off more a facial spasm than anything. She blinked up to see the sight of a car parked against the curb waiting in the darkness. Ravyn’s smile collapsed as her stomach plummeted. Beyond the window Mike raised his arm flashing his wristwatch at her. Ravyn looked around to make sure no one was noticing. She snatched up her money, her bag, and strode from the café with her eyes scouring the streets anxiously. The door swung open and Mike told her to get in. The faint smell of marijuana made her recoil with disgust.

“Move your ass,” he said, “Man hasn’t got all day.”

They drove to a place Ravyn hadn’t been before where Mike got out, went inside and came back half hour later with an envelope in his fist. Closing himself inside the car he opened it up and scoured inside. All hundred dollar bills, and by the looks of it, at least a few thousand in total.

“Hold this,” he said, as he started the engine. He threatened to break her fingers if she took any but smiled with the corner of his mouth when he said it.

They drove to another place, a bar, an Irish bar of some sort, where Ravyn was again instructed to sit and play guard dog. She sat there for a good hour or more before she finally had enough and decided to get out and do something. In the rear view mirror she saw the silhouette of Mike shaking hands with some big guy before she saw his hand dip discreetly into his pocket. Ravyn sat breathless expecting the gun to come up and shots would be fired. Neither one happened as the men laughed, clapped shoulders, and each went their separate ways. An exchange had taken place but Ravyn wasn’t sure exactly what she had just witnessed. When Mike sunk behind the wheel again she sat staring back anxiously as if waiting his explanation. Mike merely smiled, like a man with a secret, as he snatched the envelope of money from her hand and quickly counted it.

“It better be all here-”

“It is.”

“Yeah, why don’t I trust you? A con artist knows his kind too well doesn’t he?” Mike mused.

He withdrew a note from the stash and held it towards her. Ravyn remained motionless just staring. He urged her again before he thrust it towards her. Ravyn jerked back, her head thudding as it struck again the window. Mike smiled bemusedly then the smirk became darker. She didn’t react as he pushed it down the top of her shirt so it stuck out, like a tip for some fully clothed, motionless, and defensive-looking exotic dancer. Mike s******ed as he went back to counting his money. Taking another wad of cash from his pocket he slid it inside with the rest. He pulled open the glove compartment and shoved it inside. Ravyn stared at the pistol beneath it before Mike snapped the door shut and hid it from sight again. Ripping down the note from her cleavage Ravyn frowned at him.

“So are you really a cop?”

“Do you really want to know?”

Mike was fishing around in the caddy between the seats for something and pulled up what looked to be a small piece of folded paper. He unwrapped it revealing a coloured pill inside. It looked like it had a picture on it. He looked up and smiled at her. It was daring her.

“You want some?”

“No.”

“Sure? I’ve got a shit load more where this baby came from,” he said, and quickly pushed it into his mouth.

Ravyn rolled her eyes aside out the window. She had no intentions of getting wasted with him of all people, thinking she was dicing with death enough as it was having him drive her home in this state let alone whacked off his brain on some kind of chemical cocktail. She sat staring out at the city street watching a car pull out of the surrounding car park and a young woman with some heavily tattooed man make their way to another. She waited for the engine to start but the silence continued. Cautiously she turned to Mike who sat with his head back against the head rest. A minute passed before Ravyn summoned up the courage to speak to him and when she did she sounded like she were being forced to at gunpoint.

“So… you didn’t bring me out here to… watch your car did you?”

“No I did not,” Mike agreed.

“So what, you want me to give you a blowjob and then you’ll take me home, is that it?”

Mike peeled open an eye a fraction and frowned at her. He smiled slowly.

“You’re upfront when you want to be aren’t you?” he noted, “So much for the snivelling coward hiding in the corner routine.”

“I’ve been here before.”

“I bet you have.”

“What do you want?”

“What do you think I want?” Mike returned, sharply. “I want whatever sordid little secrets you’ve got to share up there in that crazy little head of yours. Come on, Rach, you can’t tell me you spent all that time with a crooked cop and didn’t learn anything. He’s not after you cause you left him, how stupid do you think I really am? You know something don’t you, you do, that’s why you’re running...I don’t care what you did, I just want to know the tricks of the trade, the tricks I don’t know about, so I can avoid detection and at the end of the day still get my piece of the pie.”

Pulling his head up Mike turned to smile at her. He didn’t seem at all fazed about the look of utter hatred shimmering in her eyes or the way her bottom lip was quivering like she was seconds away from bursting into tears or screaming at him, or both. Reaching out to her same fearful reaction Mike cupped her cheek and then snagged a fistful of hair. Ravyn whimpered as he jerked her head aside. He s******ed at her and drew closer.

“See I’ve got bosses, I’ve got people just like you telling me what I should and shouldn’t be doing and frankly I don’t fucking like it. If I had my way I’d be running that place, not Mel, not her fucking buddies not that cripple old prick that lives under the stairs, ME !” Mike snarled, pushing the last word out through gnashed teeth. Huffing on his breaths he recomposed himself and let go a fraction so Ravyn could pull her head up and face him. She was struggling not to as she fought not to let spill her terrified tears.

“I need you’re help,” Mike sighed, wrapping his fingers around the back of her head.

He forced her to raise her eyes up and meet his. Ravyn was trembling so bad she could scarcely hold it together barely hearing a word of what he was telling her over the sickening pounding of her heart. Watching Mike sink back into his seat and pull her head forward with him Ravyn felt as if time stopped, her world shut down, and she crawled up inside her skin and hid away while the rest of her body ran on automatic pilot. Her mouth was dry and her hands were quaking as she fumbled with the button and zip of his pants, hindered by revulsion, shadows and tears.

“Help yourself,” he uttered somewhere above her, “just like that other bitch is doing.”

That was the last thing she heard, that she remembered, before everything went blank.

 

 

It was some time around nine by the time Ravyn made her way up the apartment steps feeling like a head floating above the ground without direction. She didn’t realise she was sobbing to herself wondering why people in the corridors were giving her strange looks as she made it to apartment 23 and unlocked the door.

“Rob?” she called out.

Only darkness and stillness met her. Ravyn smeared her face as if the act could help her hearing any.

“Rob?” she called out again.

Same answer.

The lights were off and the air was stale, there was no hint he had even cooked an early dinner and lay curled up in bed. Dropping her bag and her keys on the sofa Ravyn hurried to the bedroom bouncing off walls a little in her panic. Rob wasn’t anywhere and Ravyn was quickly becoming desperate. She wasn’t even thinking that Vincent had burst in and now held her boyfriend at knife point, her only thought at that moment was to run. She had to find him, he had to get his shit together, and they had to get out of here, to leave, they had to go anywhere so long as it happened right now. But with each passing second that she remained alone her fear and guilt and disgust and shame came back and choked her all over again.

At some point she remembered tapping on the door next door, at the apartment where Mike lived, feeling like if she touched the wood she would pick up some horrid disease from it. Mike wasn’t there; he was out parking the car, having explained that he had just picked her up from work should anyone ask, so no one would be any the wiser. Like he cared, she sniffed to herself, and smeared her face with her sleeve again. The way he had smirked at her when he said that made her think he knew more than he was ever letting on, like he knew something devious he wasn’t about to share let alone with her of all people. Upstairs there was no answer or sound to come from inside apartment number 21. Ravyn turned on the spot feeling as helpless as a child abandoned. She wanted to leave but she couldn’t leave without him, where the hell could he have-?

Hearing footsteps on the floor below and a jingle of keys Ravyn gasped and raced back into her apartment, closing the door behind her. She didn’t wait to see who it was, hoping it was Rob, but was suddenly conscious now of her current appearance. Darting to the bathroom Ravyn stripped down and showered, scrubbing beneath the hot water frantically. When she stepped out and found the apartment was still for the most part dark and empty how she had left it, Ravyn’s chest ballooned as she lingered in her bathrobe, clenching it with fists that were white-knuckled and quaking. She waited, damp, morose, bedraggled on the sofa with her head bowed contemplating on how best to tell Rob what had happened. When she heard another’s voice out in the hall she got up and tentatively peered through the peephole. She couldn’t see anything. It was coming from next door. Rob! She thought, and then her smile instantly fell in disappointment.

“Hey.”

“H-Hi.”

“Look, we need to talk-”

Sliding the chain into its place Ravyn made her way to the bedroom and curled up beneath the covers alone. She tried to sleep but her mind was her enemy. In the dark she lay praying for Rob but all she could feel and taste anymore was Mike.

[Peterdea]

Really short today, not motivated, not feeling up to writing a full chapter so this will have to do. Sorry for the disappointment.

__________________

TUESDAY (AKA PETERDEA DAY 6)

 

The more I think the more I regret everything I have done. I killed innocent people for no reason. What kind of person am I? What drives me to do such things?

Since moving to this place my life has really taken a turn for both the better and the worse. See now I don’t want to kill, but I can’t control myself. I could never love before, but now I’m struggling with my feelings. I’d give anything to be normal for a while. But I can’t…

 

Today started with another night terror. The same thing only now there’s more detail. The face is becoming a lot clearer. It looks like Celeste’s face, only she doesn’t look… Well she doesn’t look alive… She’s a zombie in my dream. What does that symbolise?

 

I woke up feeling horrible, so I decided I’d go to see a doctor. It wasn’t like an emotional horrible feeling, I felt extremely bad. In every way possible, I was feeling terrible.

 

“Hello my name is Doctor Richards!” the doc said in a very sarcastic tone. “What’s the problem?”

“I’m feeling like crap, all over in every way you could think of…” I started.

“So your nuts are itchy?” He said in the same tone.

“Don’t be a smartass and do something about this…”

“Take this then!” He threw a small container full of some form of pills at me.

“What is it gonna do exactly?” I asked.

“I don’t know, you take em, come back tomorrow and tell me!”

“Smartass…” I walked out feeling angry as well as hurt now.

 

I was walking home and a familiar tone rang through my ears…

“Mmmbop, ba duba dop!” I heard on the street. Some stupid buska attempting to get money. How lame. I would so kill them if Celeste hadn’t have been on my radar just after hearing it. She was standing around with Hugh. I looked at her, she turned and waved at me. I waved back with a lame smile on my face. Hugh pretended not to notice me. I started to get depressed and went home.

 

Thinking back I regret all of today… Shoulda stayed in bed…

[woodyloveslinkin]

Wednesday.

 

It was 2 am as Mike trudged up the stairways of his apartment complex. He wasn’t going to his place at all; he had no intention going back to the apartment that he had abandoned for a couple or so more hours. He had lost track of the time completely. He reeked of drugs and looked even worse, adding the blood stained shirt that he wore. He carried around the badge that he had killed a cop with the Desert Revolver in the back of his pocket. He hadn’t been out to park the car that was some bullshit excuse that all women swallowed and then considered it to be a valid reason for men to be out of reach. The blood hadn’t been there since the last time Mike saw Ravyn, it was fresh, he had business to deal with. He kicked the door open, sending the chain off it, knowing that she wouldn’t have left it open for him and was right now out of his mind. He didn’t know what to do, something had gone down terrible and he had to kill someone because they squealed to another member of the gangs that lived around Queens. Well, technically he was in the building for several minutes after he ‘parked the car’ in a disabled parking spot and started to look for Hugh, because he had ran into Justin that evening which Mike felt like there was going to be more blood on his hands if he didn’t detach his glare from Justin.

“Okay, I know you’re awake, get your fucking ass out here now,” ordered Mike, as he stood in the living room. He looked around and started to continue to walk over to her bedroom. He opened the door and flicked on the light switch. “I ain’t sticking around to be fucked around with even more. Come on bitch, you’ve got to make it to me more then just get in my pants.”

“Huh?” asked Ravyn, squinting at the eyes. “Rob?”

“No it’s Jesus fucking Christ,” retorted Mike. “No I am not that piece of stupidness. Do I look stupid to you?”

“Mike…it’s two in the morning…” she complained as Mike rolled his eyes. “How did you get in? I locked the front door and all.”

“These doors aren’t very strong and the chains break like sticks almost,” answered Mike, getting annoyed with answering the questions that he was being pounded with. She frowned as she realised what had happened to Mike. Mike sighed and stormed over to the woman, grabbed her by the arm before she could say anything about the blood that smeared his white shirt and pulled her out of bed. “Come on Rachel, time to meet some friends of mine.”

“What? Mike, don’t do this,” she requested as she was dragged out of bed and then shortly found herself being dragged out of her own house. She reached for something and latched on with the other arm, sending Mike to a halt. He frowned as he realised that she was holding onto the edge of the table. He tugged her arm hard but she cringed and Mike saw that if he pulled again she would lose her grip completely. He tugged again, but he had just underestimated her stubborn

“Jesus, it’s not like I’m going to rape you or something, I didn’t even have to force you to do anything, you helped yourself, and like any man would do, I didn’t complain,” Mike rolled his eyes. “I got what I came for, not going to ask for it…so far that I know of. Why are you resisting dammit?”

“You practically…I’m not even going to bother I won’t win in the end,” Ravyn tried to defend herself as Mike had a feeling that seeing the image of himself through the eyes of the woman that he tugged again at, would bring back the memories of the previous evening. “Why can’t you just let go of me? I need to sleep I have to work in the morning.”

“Why won’t you just come and why can’t you be like Sarah and don’t ask any questions?” asked Mike, as he felt his cell phone start to vibrate indicating that it was going to ring. “Hold on.” Mike let go of her. “You run out of my sight and I’ll make sure Vincent gets another shot at you.”

“But you said –”

“It’s an idle threat, get over it,” Mike frowned, as he drew out his now ringing cell and looked at the screen. He looked back at Ravyn who hadn’t moved. Just the way he wanted her to be. He knew he was a good intimidator when he put his mind to it and he was playing the right cards right. All he wanted was a hand of cards to win the game, just other people where trying to beat him at the moment that really rocked his boat to the point of almost capsizing. “Just stay and shut up.” He flipped open the cell and turned around. “Yeah?”

“You son of a bitch I thought you said you were going to be here by now?”

“Hold your bitch up I ain’t done with her just yet,”

“Who is it?” he heard Ravyn say in the background as he ignored her. He went up to the door he had forcefully kicked open and started to fiddle with the broken chain.

“You better come here faggot, if I get these asses on my back, you’re coming down as well darlin’, you got the drugs?”

“In my car, or it can be in my pants if you’re that desperate for some of it,”

“How’s the insurance business going?”

“Gotta meet up with Hugh and that later on today,”

“Any leads on who jumped you the other night?”

“Just the leads around your bitch,”

“Enough of the bitch comments,”

“Should I start begging for forgiveness?”

“Are you coming around or you sitting in front of the television doing jack shit?”

“What is there to watch at this time of the morning?”

“Just fucking get here with or without the bitch seriously, he’s getting shitty,”

“Tell Jacky-boy, tell him, that I am fucking coming and if he has a problem with that he can go suck my –”

“I get the message, no need to tell me the rest, I know what you’re going to tell me and that’s going to be the same thing he’ll be telling your corpse when you got thrown into the river,”

“Whatever man,”

“Whatever, seriously, get your act together,”

He slammed his phone shut and shoved it into his front pocket. He was sick of people’s deadlines especially with Jack’s. Mike had to admit to himself that he was only kidding himself trying to do Jack some good, and that Vincent was too up himself for Mike to work for him. Vincent was an ass, too anal for Mike’s liking, but Mike saw right through Vincent and he knew he could get Vincent in the back of his ass and he knew how to get to him. He didn’t want to bring Vincent down just yet, by using his past against him; he was going to toy with him some more just like Mike took the drugs off him behind his back and now Mike had a window of opportunity to do some damage to him….and of course, the person that was standing behind him, or so he assumed, as he turned around and saw no one. He blocked the sound of an open window and the wind that was blowing through it, as he tried to listen for some sound that indicated that Ravyn was scared shitless of being caught hiding somewhere. He didn’t hear anything, so he started going in and out of rooms and started to pull out all the clothes from her cupboards. He ripped up the sheets on her bed and then resorted to see if she was in the bathroom. No she wasn’t. Wait. He realised something. Open window. Was there an open window before and if there was why hadn’t he noticed before? He went across rooms to the open window and looked down.

“Fuck you bitch!” he yelled out the window; as he looked down to see an empty fire escape below him. He then stopped and realised something, as he felt something in his pocket. It wasn’t his cell that was in his other pocket. He pulled the small clear package out and looked at it under the light in the living room that Ravyn had left on before she had went to bed. He had a plan.

In a matter of minutes, after going down to his car and back, he called emergency reporting a drug dealer and that he had found a stash of drugs at Ravyn’s place from Ravyn’s landline that was conveniently placed just metres away from where he cussed out the window at the top of his voice. He knew they would respond quickly and he also knew that he was going to be suspect number one with the bloody shirt and the drugged up appearance. So he disappeared, leaving the door wide open, as he hoped that Ravyn was out there somewhere, she couldn’t have gotten far by this stage, he knew she would come to see if he had disappeared or not, and when she did come back, she would be done with possession and distributing illicit drugs. Teach her to run from him.

It was now ten in the morning and Sarah was at work. It was a busy morning shift with the diner now packed with people who were cramming to get in to eat their breakfast menu as breakfast officially ends at eleven by the diner’s rules. It was almost like McDonalds almost, this diner, it was popular for its breakfast and they were greasy as the Fonz’s greasy black hair slicked back in Happy Days. Sarah was behind the counter pouring a black coffee order that belonged to one of the old women that sat at the far front of the diner, near the windows. Sarah thought she had seen the lady in the apartment complex several times, she actually reminded her of a shadow lurking in the dark spots of society. She looked to old to be a serious criminal, but more looked like someone who relied on social welfare than anything or anyone right now. Music played overhead which was amplified from the radio in the back, so both of the staff and the customers wouldn’t get bored entirely of their job.

She placed the filled coffee mug on a saucer and started to walk over to the old lady’s table, taking the order that was written down on a piece of paper along with her. She smiled as she walked past some other people and walked out from behind counter and started to walk over. She avoided a couple of disasters including little kids running around, weaving in and out of tables as though the diner was a playground. She frowned at them and then quickly hid her frown with a smile as she realised that their parents were watching her with strict eyes.

“There you go, darlin’,” said Sarah, as she placed the saucer and mug on the table on front of the old woman who had previously looked like she was staring into thin air.

“Oh thank you very much,” thanked the old woman, as she realised that her order was ready and in front of her. She looked to Sarah and smiled. “What’s a pretty young woman like you slaving around in a place like this?”

“Trying to pay the rent, and put whatever food I can on the table,” answered Sarah, giving her a friendly smile as well. “What’s a woman like you doing in a place like this? You should be living it up in a place like Miami, not NY. New York is a place for the bums, and the run down politicians.”

The old woman chuckled at Sarah’s compliment. “I wish I could live in a place like Florida. Not my cup of tea though, too many youngsters have ruined the sunshine and the fresh air of that place.” The old woman frowned. “I swear with those eyes you could make it as a model, an actress, or even a musician. Do you do either, or have you done either one of them? You’ve got the height and the thinness for a model, not to mention how pretty you are, that’s for sure.” Sarah couldn’t help but to think about Mike after those compliments from the old lady. He had said the same when they first met. And now, look at him; he was a run down man who looked like he wasn’t the one for her.

“No, not talented enough to be any one of them to be honest, that’s how I ended up working in a place like this,” replied Sarah. “Have I seen you somewhere before? It’s probably my deteriorating saneness, but I swear I have seen you before.”

“Olivia, dear, before you have to ask me the age old question of what my name is,” said Olivia. “I’ve seen you before…” She squinted as she read Sarah’s name badge pinned against her chest. “Sarah. You live in my apartment building just Gethsemane Park, don’t you?” Sarah nodded. “Glad that we’re on the same level of saneness then.”

“Glad we’re more acquainted with one another now, just made another friend in my apartment,” said Sarah, giving Olivia a faint smile. “Don’t mean to be rude, but I’ve got to get back to work.”

“Here before you go,” offered Olivia as she pulled out her wallet from the purse that was next to her. She pulled out two hundred dollar bills. Sarah shook her head as Olivia handed it to her. “My offer. You take it you look like you don’t get tipped enough.”

“No I can’t accept it,” Sarah declined. “You look like you need the cash more than I do.” Olivia shook her head and folded the two notes, as she dipped them into Sarah’s apron’s pockets and dropped them so they hit the bottom of the pocket. “Are you sure?”

“I wouldn’t it be doing it if I wasn’t sure,” answered Olivia. “Just promise me this, get out of this joint, and get yourself one of those careers that I mentioned earlier before, okay?” Sarah nodded as the old woman smiled at Sarah. “Have a good day, darling.”

“You too,” smiled Sarah, walking away back to behind the counter. She took note of the song on the overheard stereo system that amplified the radio. She started to sing the song; it had been ages since she had heard this song. “Plant a seed, plant a flower, plant a rose; you can plant any one of those, keep planting to find out which one grow, it's a secret no one knows, it's a secret no one knows, oh, no one knows. Mmmbop… something something something…” She couldn’t remember the rest as she felt someone tug at her apron as she passed them on her way back to her usual spot behind the counter. She stopped and turned around. “Hello.”

“Hi,” replied Rob, shortly. He looked worried and looked like nothing what had looked like yesterday when everything fell into play. “Come and sit for a sec. I’ve got something to tell you. Something you were right about.”

“Oh?” asked Sarah, looking to see where her manager was and he was out of sight. She quickly turned back to Rob and took the seat opposite him, as he cleared her side of the newspaper that was spread out against the table. “What is it?”

“You were right, I should’ve listened to you when you said it, but I didn’t want to admit it at that time, I was too caught up in shock,” Rob rambled on, looking down at the table and not at Sarah. “The thing you whispered in my ear…was the truth…it wasn’t just a rumour.”

“That she was on drugs? And you didn’t believe when I said it?” asked Sarah. Rob nodded as he took off his glasses and placed them on the newly folded newspaper. Rob nodded. “I told you that by her behaviour, paranoia is a side effect of being addicted to ice.”

“Never seen her do it though,” Rob replied.

“She’s an addict, she’ll do it behind your back because she doesn’t want to lose the addiction and you at the same time,” Sarah explained. “Saw it with my father. Been there and seen that, don’t want to be near drug addicts ever. Where is she now?”

“Look for yourself,” answered Rob, as he cleared his glasses off the newspaper and showed Sarah half of the front page of the New York Daily. There was a picture of her walking down in her pyjamas of the front stairs of Gethsemane Apartment with her head held down to the camera and in hand cuffs. Rob look mortified as Sarah read the headline. Major Drug Distributer gets caught and is up for life. “Says there was a whole bunch of cocaine found around the house, almost ten kilos, do you know how much that stuff would be worth on the streets?” Sarah shook her head, as Rob took the newspaper away from Sarah. “Don’t know how she hid it from me, but she did a fair good job of it. Can’t believe it. Well, now I can, would explain to me why they wouldn’t let me back into my apartment and why there were police at my apartment. Did you see anything?”

“I’ve been here since six and even then I saw some cops and that around your place, I thought you had gone back to your place and she had murdered you for what happened last night between us,” answered Sarah, as she shook her head. Her voice dropped to a solemn mutter. “Now this would explain why she isn’t at work…”

“I went for a walk at about five, but I saw some cops around the building, but it didn’t look like a crime scene like there was when I came back, about seven,” Rob explained. “Great. She’s a drug dealer and the only person I’ve got to blame is myself. I should’ve recognised the paranoia instantly as a drugged up effect, from day one. I heard it from the newspaper before I could even get answers from the cops this morning. No wonder I left them, bloody idiots wouldn’t tell me anything.” There was a small silence, as Sarah realised that she better get back to work before her manager caught her. “Where are you going?”

“Gotta get back to work,” answered Sarah, giving him a small smile. “Meet up after work?”

“When’s after work?” asked Rob, looking to her.

“About one,” answered Sarah. “You look like you’re going to be the kind of person that will sit here until I get off?” Rob nodded and smiled.

“Hey I ain’t paying you to slack off woman,” said her manager as he came up to Sarah and crossed his arms.

“She’s my wife dammit, why can’t I talk to her about how sick our child is right now?” asked Rob, frowning, as the manager looked to him. “Our kid is in hospital, thank you. Show some respect, at least.”

“Sorry,” apologised the manager, as he looked from Rob to Sarah. “Get over your problem and come back to work within five minutes or else you’re fired. Understand?” Sarah nodded as the manager gave Sarah one last glare and walked away.

“Gotta get back to work,” Sarah said as she smiled at Rob for standing up to her manager and making up a lie that started off sounding unbelievable and then finished sounding as though Rob was implying something more than what Sarah had bargained for. “Thanks, for that.”

“You know where to find me, right here, not going anywhere,” Rob smiled as he picked up his glasses and the newspaper. Sarah walked off smiling.

It was now seven in the evening as they sat at the rooftop with their legs over the ledge, and they were looking over the city which they lived in and shared their lives and dramas together in. They looked at the sunset together with a drink of soda in their hands.

“You know, it’s been ages since I’ve watched the sun set over the horizon in ages,” she told Rob as he smiled. “Don’t know why, but Mike never liked the mixture of the colours.”

“Odd, well, I suppose we both have odd partners, well…yeah,” Rob said, as he looked like he was stumbling off to his own little world. “I don’t think I will be going down that lane or any lanes with Ravyn no more. There will be no more lanes to go down with and if she faces the court and is found guilty…what am I supposed to do? Stay with her when she’s in jail? No, no, trust me she’s done enough damage and now I’ve got no pane of glass. She’s smashed it completely with that baseball bat of hers.” Rob looked to Sarah. “What about Mike?”

“He’s a goner, I suppose, as well,” answered Sarah. “Don’t want anything to do with that man now. No contact for days now and no nothing, I’m sick of it. I’m sick of him now.” Sarah looked to the ring on her finger that told the world that she was going to be married to Mike pretty soon. She took it off and looked at it with the remaining light. “Not going to go back there.” She threw it off the roof. “That’ll go to a better cause, whoever catches it down there on the street.”

“Good move,” commented Rob, as he leant over and gave Sarah a peck on the cheek.

That night, they spent the first night together in Sarah’s apartment, with new hearts and new aims for a better relationship. Rob couldn’t go home because his place had been sealed off and wasn’t allowed to even go near the front door. Sarah had totally forgotten about her confrontation with Justin and how he had told her his true feelings towards her. She didn't want to think about it right now, as it lingered in the back of her head and was too occupied with other things. She didn't like Justin that way, and she was dead set about what she did and what she didn't want, and Justin wasn't one of them. But one of the things that she was dead set on was that she was sure that Rob was though. For the time being.

 

 

****

[FireHawk]

Wednesday

Justin had a very normal day. He didn’t want to go do anything cause of his rejection from Sarah. So he just hung out alone. It was actually to normal he thought, the only big thing to happen to him was he paid off his $120,000 credit card bill. The interest was building and that no-limit card was killing his credit but now he had some room to breathe. He was about middle class no, besides the fact he had no job and only $60,000 left over. That was over a years’ worth of pay for some people. He wrote two songs but nothing great. Then it got interesting.

 

 

Red and blue flashed into his window from outside. He jumped to the window “Shit that dude ratted onme buying from him,” he shouted. He looked out again 3 cop cars and 2 drug dogs. He had been through this procedure before and did a few months in jail for possession. He thought he could get away since he didn’t have anything on him though. He grabbed his gun for no reason. He wouldn’t shoot at the cops he knew that. He sat and waited on his sofa. It was over, starting over wasn’t going to happen. Getting back to the fame and the fortune won’t happen. A tear ran down his eye he was going to lose it all again. He waited and waited no one came to his door although there were people out side talking. He went to the peep hole and looked out. Ravyn was handcuffed. “What the fuck?”, he whispered and opened the door.

“Sir step ba…drop the weapon!” The cop yelled when Justin came out of the apartment forgetting to put the 9MM down. Justin dropped it and put his hands up. Everyone in hallway turned and looked.

“I have a concealed weapon permit sir.” Justin said kind of scared.

The cop pointing the gun at Justin looked back and said he would take care of this and to take Ravyn to the car and bring in drug dogs.

“Sir, may I see your permit.” Said the short grey haired cop who looked tired.

“Yeah, follow me.” Said Justin.

“Okay keep your hands up.”

Justin thought of how lucky he was to drop the drugs the other day. He usually hid them beside the permit. At last Justin got to the desk drawer and unlocked it and showed the cop.

“Sorry sir, but may I ask why you came out with a gun.”

“I…I heard movement like a struggle I thought.” Justin lied.

“Okay, well have a nice night, and please either leave or stay in your room this is a crime scene.”

“Yes, sir sorry for the trouble.” Justin went back into his room. There is no way Ravyn did this. She seems weird but I know drug addicts. She can’t be one. Justin thought even though he never had a real conversation with her. Mike has to be behind this. Justin went and got paper and scribbled thre notes.

 

“Hey its Justin. I think Mike is up to no good. I need some help. If you are up to it come here to Room 19 at 10:00 P.M. and let me know. And I am warning there may be blood involved.”

He put one note in Jon’s mailbox. The other note was from someone he saw around the apartment, and someone he thought would help the cause. There was a feeling inside that he would help. Although he had never met him he left the note in Peter’s mail also. He had a third note written, but threw it away he would confront Rob face to face tomorrow about it. Justin decided that was enough excitement for one day. He would go visit Ravyn tomorrow morning to find her side of story, but until then he stayed in his room playing guitar and writing.

[Peterdea]

2 Parts today, the first half is the build up to a decision of whether i will, take a break or not. It's more emo then my usual works so nyuh. I'm considering whether or not to have a break but you'll know the answer soon.

 

__________________

WEDNESDAY – The First 12 Hours

 

Stephen is over it. He no longer cares about the people who attacked him. I don’t understand that, but I suppose just to keep it that way I won’t kill the gang. Something I never thought bout would be going back on a mass plan I had. I always delivered on a plan, but I suppose New York has opened my eyes towards life. I shouldn’t waste my time murdering innocent people. I’m not a Nazi but I act like one. I do wrong things and pretend like they are the right thing to do.

But since I came here I realized that my life is terrible. Yeah I have money and happiness, but why the fuck do I kill?

There is no answer to that question. None… Whatsoever… This is why I am going to try as hard as I can, never to kill again. Maybe in my own way make amends. Make me feel better about my history that has only started to plague me since I can here. This place has put a spell on me, and I have to set things right.

Confess? No… That’s extreme and puts my future in solid doubt. I don’t want the death penalty or worse, life in prison.

So what can I do? I have to find everyone who mattered to those I killed and do something for them. The list is huge, but I have to do it. If not for me, for them and for the memory of the innocent lives I took.

After I have made amends I might seek help to destroy my murderous urges as if I have had them all my life and am only just starting to lose control, even though I actually did long ago. But maybe I should help myself.

Which is why I’m leaving. Not forever, but for a while. I can’t stay here and let guild eat me up. Maybe I should confess to someone before I go, and tell them I’ll be back. Stephen would understand but I don’t want to plague him with the secret. Celeste… Well I can barely say her name so what’s the point of trying to tell her?

 

I sat considering all the options I had. I considered packing everything and leaving tomorrow. That sounded good to me. I was so happy with the plan. Which leads up to me writing this sort of journal entry. I thought it would be good for me to confess to the nobody that is the journal. This isn’t even a real journal. It’s more just the mind of me. There is no consideration, just me. Journals are a record of events and feelings in as much detail with dates, exact times, detailed conversations, detailed paragraphs into feelings and all kinds of detailed experiences. I write short, unclear events without a date, just a day, without proper times, just estimations. I might quit this writing thing just in case it gets discovered. On my way out however, maybe I should leave it for the next person to read. My decision won’t be an easy one, but I will come to one eventually.

[Peterdea]

Part 2, as u can see, im over the murderer thing... Cant be bothered building off of it

 

__________________

WEDNESDAY – The Ending Hours

 

 

My life turned around. I will be staying. I will be happy here and my life will be full. They asked a favour of me. Stephen and Celeste both needing help. This is my way to repay humanity for all that I have killed.

I’m ready and happy to write about this…

 

It all started with the knock at my door. I opened it to see Celeste. She looked in bad shape so I invited her in. She followed me in and told me about herself and Hugh.

“I borrowed some money…” She told me. “He told me to pay it back by a few months later so I agreed. I lost the money I had when his goons raided my house. Since then he has been asking favors of me. I never do any so he takes his anger out on me. I need to stay out of sight… I barely know you… But I trust you. Please… Hide me a while, he’ll never guess…”

“Sure…” I said. I was surprised. She trusts me? No way! If I hide her, then I’ll be repaying my debts. At least half of them.

“Thankyou so much… thankyou thankyou thankyou!” She seemed so relieved. Like I had just saved her from certain death.

 

Within a few hours it was Stephen knocking on my door.

“Hey man, could I stay here tonight, I’m in a bit of financial trouble… No house anymore…” He went on. “No food… No clothes…”

“Why didn’t you say so man?” I asked sounding happy. “Dude any money you need I’ll give you, but you stay here, cheaper for us both.”

 

So somehow, it ended up, I have 2 friends living with me, which means I can’t murder anyway! I wont go into detail, we just played a lot of board games that Steph managed to salvage… Looks like I can change, and if I can’t these two will put me in my place!

[Ravynlee]

Wednesday

 

2:00am

An explosion. Yelling. Terror. The first thing Ravyn saw in the sudden light was Mike’s face. There was a wild glazed look to his eyes that chilled her to the bone. Still half asleep, startled and in shock, Ravyn froze, feeling as if she’d ‘woken’ to a bad dream that felt too horribly real – and familiar. She remembered springing to her knees on the mattress and seeing smears of red across his shirt – the same one he had been wearing when she’d-

“Come on Rachel, time to meet some friends of mine.”

No-no-no-no-

Ravyn didn’t remember what she said to him, only that she was driven by impulse; talking to him in the most non-threatening manner she was able. She was desperately struggling to understand what was happening to her and at the mercy of this all-encompassing terror that told her in every fibre of her being that something horrific was about to happen. She couldn’t move though she had to, watching his fingers reaching out towards her as if in slow motion. The feel of his grip was too strong, she couldn’t shake it, it was like steel, and it was inhuman. He tore her from the bed. There was no relief as he dragged her from the room. In shock and beyond terrified Ravyn found herself half way through the apartment before her faculties kicked in. She reached out and grabbed for the table. It scraped across the floor and jerked as it drew Mike in turn to a jolting stop. Ravyn cried out. She didn’t know whether she’d actually been screaming all along or the sound was only echoing in her head. Feeling Mike wrap his arms around her and smother her mouth she began to sob. He told her he wasn’t going to rape her but laughed when he said it. She didn’t believe him; she barely heard a word he was saying, trapped in the horrid memory of hours before with him in his car after spending every second since consciously trying to block it out. Guilt and shame and terror blanketed her as Mike jerked her free again. Maybe Ravyn gave up. Maybe she sensed if she gave in and gave him what he wanted he would go away again but some part of her knew better. Frantically she searched for Rob but he was nowhere to be seen. The apartment door was ajar but no one was on the other side of it. For those terrifying minutes apartment #23 was in a world all its own and no one was coming to help her, no one was going to hear her when she died.

“Why can’t you– I need to– I have to–!” Ravyn begged.

It was humiliating just how tightly she clung to those little things that made her life hers, that classified who she was, as if without it she would cease to exist, but Mike was unrelenting.

“Why won’t you just come and why can’t you be like Sarah and don’t ask any questions?”

Because I don’t want to die, she wanted to scream at him, but she couldn’t rationalise an appropriate response to her fear.

The phone rang and Mike made the mistake of turning his back. Though he had warned her to stay Ravyn had no intentions of doing so, she knew what happened when you blindly put your faith in a madman with a gun. And hearing the word ‘Vincent’ Ravyn cringed inside her skin – and ran. Better she should throw herself out the window than go back to that she thought, but she wasn’t really thinking at all. From the second Mike had burst into her apartment reason and logic and sense had disappeared and in their place there was only panic. Everything happened in these blinding flashes. Before she knew it Ravyn was cowering outside on the fire escape in the dark dressed in only her nightshirt and underwear and nothing else. Her back was flat against the glass of someone’s window. She knew she wasn’t skinny enough to hide in the recess but hoped in the dark shirt in the shadows and in silence it would be enough. Mike was armed and out of his mind and Ravyn knew he wouldn’t have hesitated to shoot her if she tried scurrying down the stairs. She was overweight and she would have made too much noise, not only that but she would have left herself exposed wrenching the ladder down from the first floor to the sidewalk. It was rusty and she couldn’t risk the chance it was jammed or worse - welded on place as Hugh’s dodgy repairs usually went - leaving her a sitting duck over the edge of the first floor balcony. Above her footsteps were thundering from room to room. They stopped at the window and Mike’s shadow spilled out.

“Fuck you bitch!” he yelled.

He was literally only metres away from her.

Ravyn whimpered. She couldn’t even risk cupping a hand to her mouth. She still thought she was about to die. Suddenly there was a slam followed by another and the muffled yell of another resident demanding they shut the fuck up; they were trying to get some sleep here, god damn it!

Trying not to lose complete control against the glass Ravyn waited. Every second felt like an hour, it was as if time had stopped for her while the rest of the world continued on around her. Hearing noises sounding like a crowd of people echoing through the empty stairwells Ravyn had no way of knowing whether Mike was amongst them or not (and was on his way outside to get a clear shot from the sidewalk), whether there were others lying in wait, or whether he was still inside the apartment waiting to ambush her. She had to act quickly. As quietly as she could manage in her panicked state she scrambled back up to her apartment. The window was closed but it wasn’t locked. Hefting up open she slid inside, closed it and ran back into her bedroom. Things were strewn everywhere and only now as the shock and adrenalin was taking hold Ravyn could feel the first real pangs of emotion taking hold of her. She was like a victim of a car crash stumbling away from the wreckage as she crawled inside her wardrobe, covered herself with strewn clothes, and struggled to stop herself from breathing.

 

 

“What was that?” Rob murmured, awaking into darkness.

Outside in the hall he heard loud angry footsteps. He tried to sit up but felt a dead weight on his arm. At first he was disoriented and the first word from his mouth following that started with R but it was only half formed. The sounds issuing back from the next room sounded like someone arguing. Wow, the walls really were paper thin in here, he thought, stupidly.

Half way to just pushing himself up on impulse another force had gripped him by the arm, shoulder, and then had wrapped her arms around him. It took a moment longer before he recognised Sarah’s face in the blue-grey light. Guilt stopped him as he tried turning away from her.

“I have to-”

“Shhh,” Sarah soothed, cuddling in closer.

She held on determinedly with her arms now draped around his neck. She was pulling him towards her. Rob shook his head. The elation of earlier was nowhere to be found and had left this horrible void in his stomach that he couldn’t reason his way out of. The noise next door was of Mike yelling, he was now sure of it, but still drowsy from sleep all Rob could think of was that he had to get out of there.

“Stay, stay,” Sarah was urging. “Please.”

“I can’t, I have to- Mike-”

“He’s not here, he won’t come in here, it’s not me he wants anymore, Rob, trust me-”

“But-”

Sarah was on her knees beside him. She was nuzzling closely against his neck. Her hands began to caress his bare chest and back again as Rob sat dumbly. The noise next door continued. In the melee, which sounded to be in the kitchen, it sounded as if Ravyn was sobbing. Maybe she was even screaming. Rob swung his head towards it – straight into Sarah’s determined eyes.

“She’s mocking you,” Sarah purred holding Rob’s hands in her face. “You know what they’re doing in there. Don’t listen to them. She wants you to hear it, that’s why they’re both in there; she wants you to hear him fucking her and how much she loves it-”

In a flash of anger Rob was about to shrug her off before Sarah forced him to face her again and stared into his eyes. The corners of her mouth arced cruelly but in the half light Rob didn’t see it. All he saw was Sarah’s face before she slowly lowered to kiss him. The kiss quickly intensified until they were gasping breathlessly and Sarah had almost manoeuvred Rob onto his back again.

“Fuck you bitch!” Mike yelled.

Mid-kiss Rob pulled back as Sarah found herself balk then chuckle amusedly. Rob turned to her with worry steeping his brow before Sarah smeared her smile with the tips of her fingers.

“Masochists,” she mused.

Footsteps thundered from the room and Rob sat rigid beneath her as they waited for Mike to burst into the room. The footsteps punched the carpet and descended the stairs, the sound ricocheting up the stairwell. Hearing this, Sarah stretched out across the mattress and fumbled in the dark for something. A moment later the sound of a CD dropping into place nearby followed by music settled in the room. Gently pushing her lover backwards against the pillows Sarah smiled to herself as she crawled above him and settled down atop his waist.

“There, that’s better,” she said, breathing the words enticingly against his lips.

She kissed and made love to him again before the first hint of sirens came. By the time the red and blue lights were dizzyingly flashing upon the walls Rob and Sarah stood out in the apartment doorway watching Ravyn being led away in handcuffs. Bare-chested and gripping a sheet around his waist Rob stood helpless as Ravyn slid her eyes aside to him and hung her head, saying in that one gesture what words now never could.

“Rave-” he tried to call out but the feel of Sarah’s hand outstretched against his chest made Rob choke on his words and fall silent.

“Come on,” Sarah urged, “Come back to bed. There’s nothing more you can do for her now.”

Ignoring the cops who were leaving with their prize and the sight of Justin Jonathan and Brandon looking on in disbelief, gently yet firmly pushed Rob back inside. She smirked as she drew the door to a close.

 

 

5:26

8:37

11:17pm

With a sigh Ravyn turned her face away from the clock. She sat in a cell surrounded by walls of bars. The bench beneath her was cold and hard. Her backside was numb and her toes, nose and fingertips were tingling. She sniffled as she wiped her nose on her forearm only shifting her head forward. She sat cuddled against her knees. The cell beside her was full of men ogling. The cell around her was full of women. Everyone seemed to be looking at her like the new kid in the playground. She didn’t belong here but no one believed her.

Outside the guards patrolled with lazy abandon. Fear and terror gripped her so she stayed rigid, with her tee shirt drawn up over her knees. She smiled to herself when she remembered it was one of Rob’s. Sadly Ravyn bowed her face against her folded arms and tried to cuddle against it. She couldn’t smell anything but sweat and despair.

11:22

11:26

No friends, no family, no option to make a phone call. She had no one to ring anyway; she knew where Rob lay sleeping. Wiping her nose on her sleeve again Ravyn scoured the room, her eyes hot, red and heavy. She couldn’t sleep; she was sick to the pit of her stomach with spent adrenalin and dread. She wondered if she was ever likely to see sunlight again. A court appointed lawyer had been coming all day, the cops told her. They all looked at her with either flat out disregard or sick delight. Ravyn doubted they had even sent for one. They knew who she was, they knew the stories, she was a rumour made flesh, but in such a city like New York Ravyn was hardly a blip on anyone special’s radar. She sat thinking how ironic it was at one point in her life she had been so low she couldn’t see a way out and now all she wanted to do was get out and live. But where was she likely to go to? Who was she kidding; she wasn’t going to make it far. It was a wonder she had lasted this long, she thought, but stopped short at calling it a miracle. Blinking down at the thick white scars on the inside of her wrist Ravyn sniffled remembering she didn’t believe in miracles. She didn’t believe in God for that matter. Faith was a cop-out, just like fate, like coincidence.

So what was she doing here then?

11:27

11:32

Hearing footsteps Ravyn turned her head certain it was another suit on his patrol, or another drunk or hooker or a gangster was being escorted in to join them. She snuck a peek over her arm, trying to look as impassive as was humanly possible. The glares the others were giving her were patronising and lethal. Thankfully her tears were depleted so she couldn’t react; she merely sat like a statue. The cop approached the bars and opened the door. Ravyn wasn’t even looking at his face; all she was focussed on was the baton hanging from his side. Hearing her name she blinked up. She still couldn’t move. They had to forcefully remove her.

To the laughter and jibes of the streetwalkers and drunks, even some yelling for her to be left alone and cries of police brutality, Ravyn was led in cuffs out of the group tank. The lights were brighter and her senses were scrambled. She was barely walking unaided. She didn’t care what they were telling her anyway, she did what she had always done in terrifying situations and slipped into a trans-like state. The cops thought she was being uncooperative and shoved her. The grip on her upper arm bit into her flesh like a vice. Ravyn made sounds to let them know she was listening as they dragged her down the narrow hall. They were gruff in telling her someone wanted to see her. Ravyn’s heart swelled with hope that Rob had come to save her, even now she was willing to overlook everything just to catch a glimpse of his face or feel his arms around her. But it wasn’t Rob; it must have been her lawyer. In an interrogation Room Ravyn was made to sit and was shackled to a chair. The cops walked out and left her alone. Ravyn sat deafened by the sounds of footsteps and voices in the hall and each explosion of her heart beating. There was a clock on the wall high up to her right.

11:51 it said.

Rob was probably sleeping.

Hearing the door creak open and a set of footsteps walk in Ravyn sniffed and turned her head the other way. The door swung closed behind him. A minute passed before he strolled past and tossed a manila folder on the table in front of her. Ravyn looked at it and then blinked up. A man stood on the other side of the table towering over her. Her heart seized like a stone in her chest.

“Finally,” he said.

Ravyn gasped feeling something warm and wet pool on the seat beneath her. The man smiled and quietly chuckled. It was all teeth and malevolence.

“Vincent-”

“Detective,” he said, settling down onto the edge of the table beside her. His dark eyes were dancing. “I got… reinstated. Thanks to you, I got promoted. I’ve been waiting for this day for a long time.”

[woodyloveslinkin]

Thursday.

10 a.m.

“Okay, take it down a notch, down to B minor,” said Justin, as Sarah smiled as she sat against the back of his living room and against the wall with Mike’s acoustic in her hands. They were just jamming, well, Justin he had surprised Sarah a lot. Sarah knew he was a rundown musician but not to the point where he was snorting cocaine in front of her. He had asked her if she minded and she shook her head, not wanting to go into detail about her father’s overdosing that led to his death several years before now. In the emotional state she was in now, she wanted to ask for some. She wasn’t ready for another relationship. She didn’t want to be with Rob and it was a pure accident the concept of them getting together. In her heart she still wanted Mike. She moved her fingers to the right frets and started to play the song that could really explain her emotions right now.

“I’m broke but I’m happy, I’m poor but I’m kind I’m short but I’m healthy, yeah, I’m high but I’m grounded, I’m sane but I’m overwhelmed I’m lost but I’m hopeful, baby, and what it all comes down to, that everything’s going to be fine fine fine, because I’ve got one hand in my pocket and the other one is giving a high five,”

“Good, keep going,”

“I feel drunk but I’m sober…”

“Hold, are you taking it down to B minor instead of what I told you before about taking it up to a D sharp?” asked Justin, looking quite like a replica of Mike the last time that Sarah saw him, stoned as ever, as Sarah stared at the white powder on the piece of paper on front of him on the table. Sarah shrugged, just wanting to get the song over and done with. “Do it properly, or I’m going to make you redo the same song all over again. You know how I’m like with my music. Do it properly or just don’t do it all.” Sarah muffled an apology under her breath. “Keep it going from where you left off.” Sarah started up again.

“I feel drunk but I’m sober, I’m young and I’m underpaid I’m tired but I’m working, yeah, I care but I’m restless, I’m here but I’m really gone, I’m wrong and I’m sorry baby, and what it all comes down to, is that everything’s going to be quite alright, cos I’ve got one hand in my pocket and the other one is flicking a cigarette,”

“Very nice,” commented Justin, as Sarah stopped at his comment. “I didn’t say stop.” Sarah frowned and then put the guitar down next to her and looked at the white powder that was piled neatly on a piece of paper on the coffee table in front of her. This was the shit that killed her father, and had killed her relationship with Mike. So why did she feel like she just wanted some? “What does that look mean?”

“Hit me up,” answered Sarah, crawling over to the other side of the table. Justin shook his head at her as she knelt down. “Why not? I won’t OD or anything. I know how much you have to have before you OD on this shit.”

“I know the risk involve and I’m willing to take them, you have so much to live for, I don’t right now,” Justin explained to Sarah as she shook her head at him. “I won’t let you do it.”

“Just stop being a baby, and give it here,” ordered Sarah. Justin sighed as he slid the piece of paper along the table.

In a matter of minutes both of them were high off cocaine, laughing and giggling at made up lyrics that they had just randomly made up. Sarah didn’t know that paradise felt so dangerous and the challenge thrilled her. The memories of her father should’ve have held her back from asking Justin, but they didn’t and she had completely forgotten everything about her father and Mike, and of course, what she had set Ravyn up with. She was too busy trying to have a good time and the drugs that intoxicated her were helping her to escape reality. She had tried cocaine once but that was because she was dared to and she didn’t want to chicken out from the high school challenge. Her friends and her that day, had gotten high in the girl’s bathroom at their high school and they left the school’s premises undetected and not even stopped by a single teacher, as they had decided to go back to another friend’s place instead of going to class like they should’ve done.

She laid down on the floor that she had previously knelt down on giggled at everything that she could possibly think what might happen in the future. There was a knock at the door as Sarah realised whose voice it was on the other side of it. She tried to get herself up, but Mike just invited himself into Justin’s place, demanding to know where Sarah was and saw her on the floor. He walked over to her and pulled her up to her feet by her arms. She smiled and giggled at the angry Mike, as Mike realised what she was doing. He turned around so that he faced a Justin that was starting to dance in circles.

“If I found out that you stole that from me, you’re corpse will be on your momma’s doorstep by tomorrow afternoon,” warned Mike, as he held Sarah’s wrist firmly. Sarah then realised that something was wrong and he wasn’t going to let go of her. His grip was getting harder and she frowned as she attempted to break his grip from around her wrist. He wasn’t going to budge as he shot Justin one last look and stormed out of the apartment and down the hallway to the one that he had abandoned for a couple of nights now.

“Mike, Mike…please don’t do this to me,” Sarah cried as he dragged her into the apartment by the arm and through the door of their apartment in which she felt like she was the soul owner of it now. He continued to hold her wrist firmly as Sarah tried resisting but he was too strong for her. He threw her onto their bed as Sarah thought the worse was going to happen to her. She started to cry. One second she was on top of the world dancing around and giggling aimlessly and now a good trip had turned into a bad one. Was she just imagining things or was this for real? She was so confused.

“Hold tight, I promise I won’t bite if you don’t squeal, just keep your mouth shut and no one gets hurt,” Mike said as he undid his zip on his pants, and laid on top of her. He whispered in her ear. “See, I came back. Everything’s all good. I’ll be sticking around for a while so you better get used to the way I like to play ball.” Sarah tried to say something in reply but Mike hushed her as he started to kiss her neck. “You know…I still want those kids.”

“No…” she mumbled but her mumble went unnoticed as she couldn’t move because she was pinned down by him. She shook her head but even that went ignored, as she felt the zip on her pants go down. “No…please Mike…I don’t want this…” She might’ve been intoxicated with drugs right now, but this wasn’t real, she told herself, it was a dream, it was a good trip gone wrong. It couldn’t hurt her…could it?

“Just shut up, okay?” asked Mike, lowering his voice, and frowning. “Don’t say anything and no one gets hurt.”

Mike wasn’t in any rush to get to any place, because of what he was doing, was just natural. As far as he knew they were still together and that just meant that he could have the freedom to do whatever he wanted to do to her. Sarah didn’t say another word, she was too afraid because she was starting to little mythical creatures floating in the air behind Mike. She wanted to say something but every time that she opened her mouth she was always silenced. So in the end she just didn’t say anything.

It was midday, as Mike rolled over in his bed with the sheets wrapped around his waist and as Sarah turned her back on him and rested on her side, with the sheets wrapped around her body. She stared at the clothes that Mike had ripped off himself and off her as well, because he knew that she wouldn’t volunteer to do it herself. She sat up, still with the sheets wrapped around her as she tried to make sense of what was happening. The creatures, what were they? Why was she having such a bad trip when it started out so good? She didn’t know, as she laid back down.

“Pass me my pants,” requested Mike, as he rolled over and hugged his partner. “Please.”

“Why? So you can put them back on and then take them off to fuck another chick?” asked Sarah, frowning.

“Would I do that to you?” asked Mike, putting on an innocent face, knowing that by using that face he could get away with anything, including the truth. Sarah sat back up again and leant over down to the floor to pick up his pants, as Mike couldn’t help but to notice the new nice view he had right there in front of him. “Yes momma.”

“What was that?” asked Sarah, as she picked up his pants and threw it over her shoulder and landed on Mike, as Mike came back into reality and Sarah laid back down.

“Nothing, you’re just on a bad trip, you’re hearing things,” answered Mike, as he ripped his belt out from around his pants and threw it next to him. Sarah didn’t know what was happening, still. He pulled out a couple of full syringes from a container he had in one of his pockets from the pants that he had in his grip and placed the container next to him. He threw the pair of paints onto the floor near him. “Come here bitch. You’re having the real shit. Stuff the shit that Justin gave you.” Mike managed to grab Sarah’s arm before she had a chance to take everything in. “It’s not going to hurt.”

“What is it…?” asked Sarah.

“Medicine, you’re sick right now and you need help, this stuff will help you,” answered Mike. “…to regain normality, that you’ve hated me for, for the past couple of days for.” Mike wrapped his belt around her arm and pulled it tight. “Hold and don’t let it go loose.” Sarah held the end of tightly like Mike had told her to do. Still, she was confused and didn’t know what was happening. Mike removed a syringe from the container and flicked at it for a couple of seconds. “All good. Don’t move.” Mike dug the needle into her arm and inserted the narcotics into her bloodstream. Sarah didn’t feel so good now. The mythical creatures had multiplied and they were everywhere. Darkness had suddenly filled the room for her, as Mike withdrew the needle and unfastened the belt as Sarah’s grip had gone loose. So much dark for Sarah…immobile and couldn’t see…what had happened to her?

Mike smiled as he threw the needle and belt over to her side and then continued to hide the container that had contained the rest of the syringes under the bed. He got on top of her again and kissed her cataleptic face. Once he had got what he gotten for, he rolled over and picked up the phone that still laid on the floor next to his side. He picked up the receiver and dialled emergency.

“911, what’s your emergency?”

“I think my wife just overdosed, I need an ambulance right here right now,”

“Where’s right here, sir?”

“Apartment 21, Gethsemane Apartments, Gethsemane Park, Queens,”

“Is she still breathing, sir?”

“Just barely, you guys really need to come right now,”

“An ambulance and paramedics will be right over, sir,”

He had to get dressed and fast, and needed to hide the rest of the heroin in a better place than under the bed, like in his car, because Mike didn’t want to be caught with the drugs and do life for having possession of them, let alone he need to quickly clean himself up so he didn’t look like he had just basically planted the drugs in her system.

It was now nine in the evening and Mike was still sitting down in the emergency waiting room for any news about Sarah’s condition. He sat there staring at the floor congratulating himself for such a brilliant setup. Her mother had been and gone, and even that Mike was glad that she had left before he pulled out a knife and slit her throat with it.

“Congrats,” said a pasty-faced man with a black hat and black evening attire on. Mike shot up to his feet. “You know how to play well don’t you?”

“I do,” answered Mike. “Jack, what are you doing here?”

“Came to give my congratulations, nothing else really,” answered Jack. “But there is one thing.” The man paused and gave Mike a stern look. Mike looked a bit confused. “Is Vincent on this case?” Mike nodded as he could remember the times where Mike had to hide quickly in a nearby room just in case Vincent recognised him. Jack looked away, cussed underneath his breath and looked back to Mike. “Detective now isn’t he?” Mike nodded. “Or more like he’s claiming. Could’ve fooled me a long time ago that leader, but not now. If my suspicions are correct, he was the one that jumped you the other night. You’ve got access to her, and you know who I mean when I say her, I bet you’ve already fucked her. Am I correct?” Mike nodded. “How did I guess? Any who, keep an eye out for Vincent, if he’s given another chance he’ll jump you big time. And who said cops can’t play dirty? That’s what they do best nowadays don’t they?” Mike nodded. “Before I go, got the message from Derrick from what you said to him the night you were too busy fucking her or whatnot, don’t care and don’t tell me if you were, and you can go suck mine as well. Don’t underestimate me boy. I’m the one that’s taking care of your insurance business for you. Hugh’s doing a fine job as well. Well, in that case. I’ll be seeing you around and like I said before, be careful of Vincent, he’s going to jump you again if he was the one that jumped you that night. Good evening, Mike.”

Jack nodded and walked away, as Mike felt the authority of Jack look down on him as though he was God and he was looking down on Mike as though he was a small ant. Mike sat back down as he rested his eyes and tilted his head back against the wall. Sarah however, was fighting for her life in a hospital bed not far from where Mike sat.

****

[FM2005]

Thursday...

 

Ugghh the new job I got in NYC is taking a toll on me. It seems like I work non stop and I never can get a chance to talk to anyone. So far I have made zero friends. And today I quit that job, getting 17 hours in 2 days is just too crazy for me, imagine if I worked the whole freakin week.

The only positive thing was that there was this one girl who always came in, I guess deciding if she was going to buy that TV or not. I always offerd to help her out and got to know her a bit.

"Just a crush" I thought.

Life moves on, but it seemed like I was wasting too much of it doing something that diddnt involve fun. Just like when I was home. My friends would be out partying and me at work. I swear I heard my friend say he lost his virginty 9 times, all nine times he was drunk and couldent remember. I laid down on my bed. Thinking about my friend calling me the next 40 Year Old Virgin, I knew it was a joke but man that would suck. I laughed out loud.

The day was far from productful, i took the chance to clean up my dirtied room. Things seemed to be getting quieter around the apartments, maybe people were just finally starting to finish settling in. Like me. Only 5 times crazier.

Late that night I sit inmy chair and started sketching, i dont know why but it just hit me and I started drawing, anything from people to random creatures. I forgot that I was a decent artist! I even wowed myself for a second as I stared at the construction paper covered in ink. I decided to hang it on a blank spot on my wall and maybe fill it up as time went on.

My hands hurt from drawing so much that I think ill give up for the night. Ill wake up and see what can happen tommorow

[Ravynlee]

It's short but better than nothing. Could add more to this later. Just wanted to post something before due time, for a change

At least I'm in a position to post about this day in part tomorrow - I'm in jail. Nothing much to that right now, 'eh? haha

 

Edit: Thought I'd point out the start of this is basically flashing back to yesterday. It's a bit of a cheat, but it's filling that gap between Rav getting arrested and the start of Sarah's update. After what happened I wasn't willing to have him just lie around in Sarah's bed and not have a second thought about it. So it's a wednesday and thursday post (Rav was arrested early wednesday morn and sat in jail all day and night. Couldn't just start the next day without explaining what Rob did... sort of. Hope that makes sense... )

 

 

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Thursday

 

Less than a day after Ravyn’s arrest the day before and Rob found himself standing alone in the doorway of his apartment looking like a wounded man.

After the sirens and lights and general chaos disappeared in the early hours so too did Rob’s stubbornness – he knew that he’d screwed up, and that Ravyn was in trouble, but the fact he had been so close and done nothing weighed upon him heavily. After she had led him inside Rob had pulled himself away from Sarah and ignored her affronted gaze to begin snatching his clothes up off the floor. As he started to hurriedly dress, Sarah had followed watching him. She didn’t want him to leave, she wanted him to come back to bed, she was practically whining it, sounding as if her only concern was for her ruptured sleep pattern and not one of shock at seeing her next door neighbour and his girlfriend being led outside in handcuffs leaving the apartment behind her a crime scene. Though the cops had given little explanation as to why (other than to go down to the station and wait) Rob could feel it in the pit of his stomach that something major had happened. The look Ravyn had given him as she was led away was painful but the looks of his neighbours was practically intolerable – in the court of public opinion Rob had already been convicted, tried and sentenced as a guilty man.

“I have to go see her,” he uttered on Sarah’s sofa knotting his shoelaces together. “I know I screwed up, but I can’t- if we take your car we could practically meet them at the station.”

Sarah had refused to get dressed, adding she was tired, there was nothing they could do, and beyond all that she didn’t know where her car was. It was Mike’s car after all and she wasn’t really allowed to touch it without his permission, besides she didn’t know where he was now anyway. Hearing the name Rob’s focus immediately shifted. He had seen officers dusting for prints around the doorhandle and had noticed that the lock had been broken. Mike was now missing. Rob was seething.

“We have to get out of here,” he said.

He dragged Sarah by the arm into her room to where she could get dressed. Sarah obviously thought he was just being rough with her and wrapped her arms around his neck again but Rob ripped her arms down from around him. He didn’t want to have sex, he just wanted to get her out of here and somewhere else safe should Mike return again.

“I’m not going anywhere,” she said, putting some distance between them. “This is my home, Rob. I’m staying right here.”

She wouldn’t listen to his fears that whatever Mike had done in the past or just now to Ravyn even when he took her in his arms and tried to physically shift her. Sarah went from endearing to defensive as she warned him to stop telling her what to do. His girlfriend may have been crazy but that didn’t mean she was, besides, she was going to wait right here for her man to come home.

Rob gasped out a sound at Sarah’s declaration, feeling as if she had just kneed him in the stomach. The bedroom that they now stood in, beside the bed that they had made love in and that she shared with someone else, was still tainted by the scents of sex and sweat. He made a move towards her with his arms out, thinking she was in some sort of delayed shock, expecting her to break down against him and beg him to rescue her from this life of pain she had helped fashion but stopped in his tracks as Sarah backed away from him.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” he said bemusedly, but gain Sarah withdrew from him. “If you’re worried about Mike, you don’t have to be. I can take care of you, somehow we can-”

“Rob,” Sarah said, smiling that seductive little smile at him as she brushed her red hair back over her bare shoulder. “That’s sweet but… it’s not necessary. But my place is here. What we had…”

“But,” he countered. He was more than stunned he was a little confused. “What about all those-… things we talked about? About not going back to him, about-… us?”

Sarah’s smile broadened, it was almost patronising as she stepped closer now as with one hand clutching the sheet and the other caressing his face she looked up at him. Her blue eyes were vibrant and deep, the colour of frozen ocean water.

“What about the ring? You threw it away for me, you said-”

“Shh. I didn’t do it for you, silly” she cooed, “I did it for me. The truth is I don’t know what I want right now… but I know you and I… well… it was fun-”

“Fun?”

“But you have to understand, Rob, I still love Michael.”

“You can’t be serious? Fun?”

“Yes Rob, you remember what that is? You and I, together there,” she pointed with an arm outstretched towards the tangled sheets and dented mattress. She grabbed his arm as in disgust Rob tried to walk away. Sarah turned him around to face her – and the very scene of is disgrace - again. “Come on; don’t tell me you didn’t enjoy it-”

“Stop it.”

“I know you enjoyed it - several times, in fact. I’m surprised I’m even walking-”

“You’re crazy-”

“No, see, your girlfriend is, that’s probably why they locked her away-”

Glaring at his lover Rob snorted and said nothing before he tore his arm free and stormed out. With a loud bang the front door ricocheted on its hinges. Sarah balked at the sound but slowly a small smile crept out as she made her way towards it to push it closed again. Out of the corner of her eye she caught sight of the yellow tape that barricaded the doorway in the next apartment Sarah scoffed to herself and went back inside.

 

 

For the remainder of the day Rob was kept out of the place he had known as home for just over a week by thick strips of yellow tape. As badly as he wanted he couldn’t force himself to step inside. It felt sacrilegious to be setting foot inside without her. Rob paced from floor to floor and sat a while in the hallway in the early hours of wednesday morning by himself just thinking, locked out by the burden of his guilt and remorse and feeling like a mourning parent outside their dead child’s bedroom. He saw Jonathan from the other end of the hall going to work but nothing was said between them. Rob couldn’t meet his eyes. Around him he knew everyone else was watching passing judgement too as if the walls themselves had eyes and ears and were conspiring. Rob scoffed to himself as he heard someone down stairs banging a door closed. He sounded as crazy as…

Never mind.

He sighed.

He paced all night, wrestling with his thoughts until the sky became awash with pastels early Thursday morning. Occasionaly Hugh wandered by still depending on his crutch when it suited him and invited Rob in his usual gruff tenor to wait down in his apartment if he wanted. Rob shook his head but eventually conceded, at least until the questions started. Then he thanked him, went back upstairs, and settled back in his usual spot on the floor. Though he looked like a hobo he remained there for hours, serving some kind of literal pennance for sins he was trying to forget he'd comitted when he didn't completely want to. Sporadically he would get up and head up to the roof from time to time to get away from it all and the sounds of other tennants talking amongst themselves, watching TV, generally going on in blissful ignorance, just to breathe. It still felt so surreal, everything that had happened, everything that he'd done, but Rob was struggling now on how to face up to it, to all of it. He missed Ravyn but residual anger for whatever hand she'd played in this still lingered. Though Rob didn't want to believe what Sarah had told him something internal still nagged away at him. A part of what she had said rang true; Ravyn was and always had been attracted to bastards like Mike and he'd never been able to figure it out much less become whatever she wanted. But thinking only brought him back to his own discressions and Rob was always quickly overwhelmed. He needed someone to talk to but no one around him would listen. His greatest champion sat in a jail cell and the rest of Gethsemane Park seemed to have gone out of their way to avoid him as if he'd been singlehandedly responsible. Rob huffed to himself remembering the looks that the guys at the other end of the corridor had given him, as he stood there practically naked with Mike's on-again off-again fiance hanging off him like a prize. He'd never thought in a million years it was possible to feel as vulnerable as he did at that moment and residually since - he wondered if maybe that was what it was like for a woman after she'd been assaulted but such stupid parallels only made Rob angry. Maybe the only person he had to worry about was Mike as it seemed even in his absence his dark shadow over this place still lingered. Everyone was afraid of him but no one would say it. Rob could hardly believe he was in the right time or the right place thinking back to a happier time just over a week ago when he and Ravyn had moved in here and had settled in to their new start together. Everything had seemed so normal, so...

Frustrated Rob growled at the sun and rubbed at his head and his hair still smelling Sarah's perfume on him in the right wisp of breeze. He hated everything about the last 24 hours but he was too burdened to face any of it right now, as a pacifist Rob couldn't.

As the sun rose higher in the sky Rob went back down stairs to sit outside his apartment, sitting with his back to the wall so he didn't have to face his closest neighbour. His cell rang but he didn't answer it. It was Ravyn's work and he didn't know what to say to them - if he said it aloud that would make it all real and he'd have no choice but to deal with it. On the other side of her door Sarah seemed silent. He expected her to come out and at least apologise at some point but she never showed and that too left a bitter taste in the back of his mouth. As tempted as he was he couldn't get up or knock on her door to ask if he could crash on her sofa. He wouldn't. He waited for Mike to show up but as the sun began to illuminate the street and the tenemant began bustling with life there was still no sign of him.

By 10am, hungry, anxious, sleep deprived, and with no official word from the police or in regards to Mike’s whereabouts Rob finally pushed himself up, dusted himself off and thundered down the stairs determinedly. He didn't know where he was going but he knew he just had to get out a while and clear his head. He wanted to face Ravyn but something heavy and stubborn inside of him couldn't. Not yet, he had to figure things out first and he would have to do it away from such a familiar setting. Leaving a message at Hugh’s apartment and checking to see he had his personal belongings, Rob bowed his head from the glare of the sun shining through the front glass doors. Shoving his fists inside his pockets he steeped his shoulders, hurried his stride, and dissapeared up the street away from this place and the dark cloud that seemed to be hanging over it.

He didn’t return home again for many hours and by that time night had well and truly fallen.

[MrsBennington-Delson]

Friday

It’s been already afternoon as we got home from our trip. I felt relieved and completely new since I spend such a beautiful week with my baby.

Brad parked in front of the complex we were living in. On our trip, Brad and I decided to move together now. It felt more than good to me to finally have him around 24/7.

I waited for Brad in front of the entrance door as I scanned the street. Some people were walking around, looking busy, I heard some birds and saw cars driving by. Someone tore the entrance door open. I twitched. In front of me there was a man standing and looking at me with glassy eyes. I couldn’t concentrate on anything else, when he started staring into my eyes. He looked tired and just like he was keeping some dirty secrets. Brad approached and stood next to me looking at the man inquiring.

“Hey.” The man looked over to Brad and said lost.

“Hi. Is there something wrong?” Brad put his arm around me.

“Oh uhm no. I’m Mike. Livin’ in apartment number 21.” He said quickly and seemed like he’s feeling haunted by something. Or even someone.

“I’m Brad and that’s Jos my lovely girlfriend. We’re living just next to you in number 22” Brad looked at me amorous and extended his hand towards Mike to shake it.

“Ah nice nice.” Mike looked around nervously. “Well fellas I gotta go now. Nice meeting ya” And he walked off as if nothing ever happened.

Brad and I looked at each other confused and then turned our heads to see where Mike was going. “Hmm strange.” Brad said and walked in.

I stood there still, watching Mike go. What was that? The effect he left on me was weird. It’s like I felt it before but then again completely new and unknown.

“Jos?” I heard Brad’s voice through my thoughts. “You coming up with me?”

“Oh uhm… yeah yeah sure.” I turned around and smiled at Brad as I took his hand and we walked upstairs.

Back up in our apartment I unpacked our bags from our little trip.

“I’m going to take a shower. You wanna go with me?” Brad smirked at me.

“I’m sorry I can’t right now. I’ll unpack our bags and then make something for diner.”

“You can do that later honey” He stood in the doorway to the bathroom and almost begged me to come with him.

“I’m really sorry babe. I so need to do that stuff now, you know me when I have some task to do I can’t do anything else until I did it.”

“Oh well ok…” He said kind of disappointed and turned into the bathroom to get a shower.

I quickly finished unpacking our bags and started looking for the form I filled out for the job in the school I got last week.

“Jos?”

“Yes?”

“Haha I just thought of that evening we were in the park. Do you remember that?” Brad called from the bathroom.

Lost in all those paper sheets I had on the table in the living room I replied “Uhm… you mean the one when we went for a walk and saw that old couple and talked bout being old and ugly?”

“Haha yes.” I heard his voice come closer. He bend down on me from behind while I was sitting on the couch still looking through all the papers I had. “Do you remember what I told you that night?”

Concentrated on the papers I said “Uhm lemme think… well I remember you saying you’d like to…”

“Oh Jos I didn’t mean that haha. You lil perv!” He laughed, walked around the couch and sat next to me. “Why don’t you leave that for a second?” Brad tried to kiss me.

“I’m sorry, I can’t. I need to find this form.” I backed down.

Brad sat upright and looked at the table. I knew he wanted to say something but he didn’t. I guess he didn’t want to hurt me.

I looked at the paper sheets then down on the floor. I put them back down on the table, looked at Brad and sighed.

“I’m so freakin sorry.” I hugged him.

“It’s fine. I understand.” He gave me a kiss on the cheek.

I hugged him tight without saying anything more. Something was going on with me again. But I didn’t know what.

“Oh hun, you hungry?” I asked quickly.

“Yeah, I’m starving actually if I may say.” He tried to smile.

“Imma make you something ok? You just lay back and make it comfortable for yourself ok?”

“Ok.” He said a bit offended.

I quickly got up and walked into the kitchen to cook something. Hmm what could I do? Lasagne!

As I prepared it, I saw Brad stand up from the couch and walk to the window. He looked outside, completely lost in thoughts. Is he worrying about me? Or is he just looking outside to see the city?

“It’s almost done!” I called out happily and looked over to him with a smile.

“Ok.” He continued looking outside.

I walked over to him and hugged him from behind.

“You ok sweetheart?” I asked in a calm voice.

“Mh… I guess…” He answered not too happy.

“Brad what’s wrong?” I stood next to him.

He sighed and looked down on the floor.

“I apologize for my behavior. I really don’t know what’s wrong with me.” I said and followed his eyes down at the floor.

“It’s not you.” He looked up at me. “I mean… it’s more like you’re thoughts. Sometimes they are killing you. It seems to me like you can’t let them go. It’s kinda… it’s… it’s killing me to see you suffer!”

I gasped and rugged my eyes.

“Brad… I know… I hate it myself and you don’t even want to know what’s up. But I just can’t tell you. My past is what it is, I can’t change it anymore, no one can.” I felt this freezing cold coming over me.

“See that’s what’s killing me! I understand that your past might be the hell or worse but why don’t you let me help you? I love you and I always did! I would never hurt you!”

“Brad I know!” my eyes started filling with tears. “I know that…” I tried not to cry. “But I can’t… I’m sorry I just can’t! I’m sorry I just ca…” I felt tears running over my face.

I grabbed my jacket and my little purse opened up the door and ran out. I looked up shortly to see if there’s any way to get onto the rooftop and saw a young man standing in front of me. I couldn’t really see much since my eyes were all blury because of my tears, all I noticed was his long blond hair.

“Yo Miss you ok?”

I didn’t answer just ran upstairs onto the rooftop.

Up on the roof I looked over the skyline. It was amazing! I forgot all my worries and memories for a second and just continued looking over it.

I sat down on the ground and looked for my cigarettes in my purse. Yeah I know I’m actually a non-smoker but sometimes I just need one. I found the pack and took it out. Looked at it. Menthol Cigarettes Light was written on them. “Ridicioulus” I thought and light up one.

It was already dark so all the city lights were glowing and dancing in my eyes. I wipped away my tears so I could see the lights more clearly.

My week with Brad was fantastic. He is more than I could ask for. But still for some reason I can’t tell him what’s been happening in my past. I drifted away in my thoughts. Moments with Brad flashed in. I saw us kissing, hugging, laughing, and arguing. Between all those moments, where my life seemed complete, I’ve seen those moments of my past who have almost ruined myself. Like razor blades they cut through my mind and all those beautiful moments I had.

Groaning I hit myself against the head. I felt like screaming. Screaming until my soul slips out of my body. I cried like it was a way to let all the pain out, all that frustration I have had.

Suddenly I heard the door open and turn out the cigarette.

“Who is there?” I stared into the dark, not seeing who was standing there.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

[woodyloveslinkin]

Friday.

11 a.m.

Mike burst through his apartment’s front door and suddenly stopped, as he felt something was wrong. He felt as though someone was there and breathing down on him like he was a creature of a small and insignificant proportion. He was only meant to be in here to get some money so he could pay Rob his salary for doing actually quite nothing all week. In which, Mike was thankful and Rob didn’t ask any questions to why he wasn’t out and about selling insurance to people.

“Come on, get out of your hiding hole, and face me, Vincent,” growled Mike, as he assumed that the only person that would hide like the way that Mike felt like he was doing, was Vincent. But there was something in the back of his head that told him that it wasn’t. Mike drew out his weapon from his back pocket. “Come out and play Vincent.”

“Don’t point that at me, you should know better,” growled Jack, coming out from the shadows of the corner of the room. Mike lowered the weapon and put it back to where it was before, in his back pocket. Mike was about to start apologising to Jack but Jack started to talk before Mike could say anything. “Don’t start. We’ve got some major damage to do now, because of what Vincent has done.”

“What has he done this time around?” asked Mike.

“What hasn’t he done?” asked Jack, shaking his head. He was angry and Mike hated it when he was angry. Mike had known Jack for a while now, but it only had been in recent times that Mike took up Jack’s offer to join Jack’s gang warfare against the cops, which were mostly corrupted anyway, of the NYC police department. “That little shit is going to pay for what did. He got his badge and his group of law-abiding bitches and arrested three of my men on the basis of a cover up. Do you know what this means, Mike? He’s going to start playing his cards right for once and he’s going to jump you again. You need to get out of this city. Leave Sarah behind, tell her that it’s all over, do the right thing…wait, if I recall correctly didn’t you like hit her up last night?” Mike nodded as Mike realised that Jack was in his usual black suit attire and his black top hat, as it covered his greasy long black hair. “I have a plan Michael. A very good one.”

“I adore your plans at times Jack, but I hate the ones that end up me being the bad guy,” Mike commented. “Not like I am one already, I consider what I’m doing the right thing for society, really. People like Vincent don’t deserve to be in high places like where he is now. If he’s going to be a dirty cop he shouldn’t hide it.”

“You’re telling me about it, I’m the one that utterly hates the guy,” Jack commented, taking off his black top hat and sitting down in the light on the couch. “You need to get that woman of yours outta the hospital as soon as you think she’s okay. You know nowadays those doctors and nurses, pfft, why do you need a medical degree to know how to insert a needle?” Jack shook his head. “Okay, I’m getting sidetracked. Just get her outta there and I’ll tell you the next step of the plan. You just, bring her back here, make sure she gets out today and say…I’ll meet you back here at midnight.”

“Can I at least be told what the rest of this plan is?” asked Mike. Jack shook his head, as he got to his feet. “Thanks for telling me jack shit, Jack.”

“Anytime, Mike,” replied Jack, as he gave his farewells and left the apartment, slamming the door afterwards.

Mike walked to over where Jack had previously sat down and took his sit. He slumped down into the couch and started to think about where the remote was for the television was. He just wanted something to entertain himself for a while. He gave up trying to look for it, as he realised that shooting up would pass some time for the time being as he didn’t know when the right time to take Sarah from her hospital bed was. He drew out the plastic container with the needles in it that he had out yesterday, opened it, removed his belt from his pants, wrapped the brown belt around his arm, pulled it tight, and shot up as he had nothing else better to do. His world went black as the syringe fell out of his grip and onto the floor, while the brown belt went loose around his arm and he blacked out.

3 p.m.

Mike groaned as he sat up. He felt as though he had the worse hangover combined in with the worse nightmare. He slowly found his feet on the floor as he looked to his watch on his wrist to see that it was three in the afternoon. He then remembered that he had to get Sarah out of hospital because Jack had said so. The apartment was so quiet and if things were normal, it would be full of yelling at one another and silence would’ve been extinct. Normality had been opposed. He made sure he had his car keys in his pocket, and his wallet. He didn’t pay any attention to the drugs on the floor of his apartment and left the apartment, leaving the door wide open for anyone to come and take things.

On the way down to his car he ran into Rob who looked emotionally exhausted. Mike stopped to have a quick chat to him. There were nods and smiles exchanged. Mike pulled out a large sum of cash out of his back pocket which had been causing a huge lump on his ass, from the backward view he looked though he had a melanoma growing on his ass. It was Rob’s work money for doing practically nothing. Mike explained to him that there were some legal issues going on at the moment and that Mike insisted Rob that he was going to start selling some insurance soon, as soon as this legal matter was over and done with. Mike also thought by saying that Rob needed the cash as well, and that he was happy to give him some without any paybacks or interest, would settle Rob’s nerves a bit. They departed one another as Mike felt proud that he was on a roll with his criminal activities. Rob followed Mike down to the corridor on the first floor, as they had a nice little conversation about how Rob was thankful of Mike so much and all. Mike smiled as he opened the front door of the apartment complex and left Rob inside.

When he was on the street downstairs, as he jiggled his car keys in his hands he ran into a couple. Mike hadn’t seen them before.

“Hey,” Mike looked over to the man as he stopped to try and be nice for once. He knew he must’ve looked like a drug addict them, but he didn’t really care right now. He had better things to worry about.

“Hi,” said the man, as he put his big heavy arm around his girlfriend, or so Mike assumed at first. It was either his girlfriend or his sister. Mike restrained from shuddering about such thoughts “Is there something wrong?”

“Oh uhm no,” Mike tried to find the words as he tried to get the whole sister-loving thing out of his head. It was either a big mood swing or a side effect from the drugs. “I’m Mike. Livin’ in apartment number 21…”

“I’m Brad and that’s Jos my lovely girlfriend,” Brad cleared up Mike’s horrible thoughts about them being related by blood. “We’re living just next to you in number 22” Brad looked at his girlfriend extended his hand towards Mike to shake it.

“Ah nice nice,” Mike replied, as he looked around for an excuse to leave. He had to be somewhere and that place wasn’t here. “Well fellas I gotta go now. Nice meeting ya” And he walked off as if nothing ever happened.

It was a matter of minutes when Mike parked his car in the hospital’s car park. He slammed the driver’s door shut and continued to power walk into the hospital. He stopped at the reception to ask if Sarah was okay or not, and the nurse simply replied back by saying –

“Yes, she is okay but I don’t know about you, but I reckon you type of people should be ashamed of how you treat your bodies,”

Mike shrugged as continued to walk to Sarah’s ward. He saw Justin exit as he entered. Mike stopped and tugged on Justin’s shirt. Justin turned around and gave Mike a blank stare.

“You better be careful where you walk from now on, I know where you live,” Mike threatened. “Too busy shooting up on crack to even care about Sarah passing out, and call yourself a friend to her, friends don’t let other friends fuck themselves up.” Mike was going to start something with Justin and he loved every minute of teasing the guy. Justin and him exchanged quite a few harsh words but they were shortly interrupted by Sarah clearing her throat, as she sat up right in her hospital bed, looking worn down as ever. “I’ll deal with you later.” Mike looked back to Justin and let go of his shirt. Justin said his goodbyes to Sarah as Sarah simply smiled. Mike wasn’t happy. Mike walked over to Sarah, drew up a chair, and started to talk to her. “I hate it when Justin does this to you.”

“Did he do it to me?” asked Sarah, solemnly, not sure what to believe. She could hardly remember what happened the day before. One of the last things that she remembered was that she was playing One Hand in My Pocket by Alanis Morissette in Justin’s apartment. Mike nodded as Sarah just wanted to cry. She knew that Justin was a friend but she didn’t know that friends had the right to do that each other.

“He also…took advantage of you when you were passed out,” Mike said to her, as Sarah looked to him shocked. “I walked in right in the middle of everything. I tore him off you and I was the one that called emergency. Why are you friends with him Sarah?” Sarah didn’t do or say anything, she couldn’t believe it. Justin had never said anything about Mike or anything like that when he had just visited her. All he told her was some things about Ravyn that was all. “Babe, I’m getting you out of here. They are going to tell you awful things about what Justin did to you and I don’t want you to know of them, just yet.”

“Like what?” asked Sarah, as Mike got to his feet.

“You just need to get out of here, that’s all it matters,” answered Mike. “I bet to God with my heart and everything else that comes along with it, that he’s going to come back here and rape you in your sleep. You need to come with me, because then you will be safe with me.” Mike looked around to see if there were any staff around and it was clear. Sarah didn’t say anything because she was too shocked. For once she couldn’t find any words to describe any words that told Mike how she felt. Mike turned back around and started to pull the machinery off her. Eventually when all the machinery that was attached to her was all off, he took off his jumper and insisted that Sarah was to wear it, leaving him wearing an old grey shirt. Sarah accepted his offer and put his black jumper on which had a hoody on it. Mike concealed Sarah’s face with the hood and told her to try and stand up. It took Sarah three times to try and stand up by herself as all the drugs in her system that were originally put there to get rid of what Mike had put in, had affected her in several different ways. She wore the jumper like a nightgown almost, with her gown that was given to her by the hospital barely sticking out from underneath the jumper. She was a tall girl, but Mike was an even taller man.

They walked out of the ward unnoticed and unquestioned, as Sarah’s bare feet stepped on ice cold floors of the hospital. Mike picked her up and carried her to his car when they had reached the very front of the doors. She wrapped her arms around his neck, as she closed her eyes trying not to think about what Justin had done to her, according to what Mike said. She couldn’t believe it. But how could Justin remain so calm when they were conversing with one another before? Then it struck Sarah, Justin never mentioned anything about what had happened but he only talked about what had happened to Ravyn.

Mike put her back to her feet, as he opened the door for her and told her to get in. She smiled, before she got in and gave Mike a kiss on the cheek.

“Love you babe, wouldn’t want anything to happen to you,” Mike said, as he suddenly noticed that there was no ring on her finger. “Where’s your ring?” Sarah looked to her hand and perfectly knew well how the ring had disappeared. Sarah looked back up and shrugged innocently. “Hmmm…must’ve slipped off in the ambulance. Don’t fret though; I’ve got us enough cash to you get that ring you were complaining about before about not having.” He kissed her forehead as she got into the front passenger seat. She tilted her head back, as Mike walked around the front of the car and got into the driver’s seat. He roared the engine up and spun the wheels trying to turn around, as he reversed. He cussed but didn’t really care in the long run. She soon found herself asleep in the car as she couldn’t really sleep in the hospital with all the machines around her beeping and displaying weird lines and all. She thought at various stages that she was going to die.

5 p.m.

Mike had lifted the sleeping Sarah out of the car and carried her limp sleeping corpse up the stairs. He had business to deal with between leaving the hospital and arriving here, he knew that Sarah was dead to the world and wouldn’t have woken up during a deal he was making with another gang member. He passed Rob again, who smiled at him and asked him what the matter with Sarah was. Mike explained that Sarah had been drinking and that she was passed out. Mike didn’t think that was a convincing lie but he quickly detached himself from that conversation before it got too intense. Mike then realised as he got to his apartment that he had left the door wide open and his drugs were missing. Mike could’ve dropped Sarah’s sleeping corpse on the spot but he didn’t. He maintained his strength and placed Sarah’s corpse on the bed. He covered her sleeping body as she stirred and curled up into a ball, with the blankets that had been messed about. He walked back into where he was before and closed the door.

He cussed as he made a couple of phone calls with his cell phone and basically got nowhere in his quest to find out who had been in his apartment lately. Out of all the things to steal from his apartment, it had been his drugs.

The last phone call ended up with some harsh words being exchanged and Mike simply in the long run rolled his eyes and slammed his cell phone shut. He cussed one more time at the inactive cell phone and threw it to the ground, smashing it into pieces. He had to waste time because it was going to be ages until Jack came back. No drugs and no nothing to spare his time and he didn’t want to watch television right now. He had a great idea of how he could past time.

He climbed into bed with Sarah, gave her a hug, and told her that she was the beautiful woman in the world. She smiled, but she really was in her own little land. Mike continued to make her smile, as she slowly realised that Mike was talking about her and to her. He took his shirt off as Sarah smiled even more, but more like a teenage girl with a little crush right now. He told her that he would do anything to protect her and that also he was in the mood. Sarah didn’t resist as she wrapped her arms around him and started to kiss him softly. He got on top of her and lifted her night gown that she still had on from their escape trip from the hospital, up.

11.59 p.m.

“Wake up bitches,” smiled Jack from the corner of their bedroom, as the couple had skipped dinner completely and went to bed. Mike rolled over and put the bed side lamp on, as Sarah stirred with the sheets wrapped around her bare body. Mike was the same but he was half naked and was proud of it. “A minute early, I’m good aren’t I?”

“How the hell did you get in here unnoticed?” asked Mike. “Actually, that’s the second time you’ve done it. You’re a sneaky little bastard aren’t you?” Sarah opened her eyes as she realised that Mike was talking to someone.

“Very,” sneered Jack, as the clock struck midnight.

[woodyloveslinkin]

Firehawk's Day - via AIM transmission

Friday.

 

“Fuck,” Justin got off the ground all he could remember is Sarah being pulled from the room and him passing out has he took a few steps to help her. He felt like he had a huge hangover. After showering and getting dressed Justin went to Mike and Sarah’s apartment. No one was there. He hoped nothing bad had happened to Sarah. He knew Mike as a lunatic. Which reminded him he needs to go see Ravyn during visiting hours. Another thing crossed his mind. Where was Sarah he needed to know at 2:30 PM he found out she was in the hospital. Her boss didn’t know why. Justin thanked him and hung up the phone. He wondered if he gave Sarah too much. “I need to go to the hospital,” Justin whispered to himself. Justin ran down and jumped into his Mustang. He arrived at the hospital and found her.

They talked the whole time Justin feeling guilty like he may have caused this, but didn’t know. He didn’t want to talk about Mike. He was just glad Sarah was alive. She didn’t real say too much the drugs were keeping her barely alive it seemed. Justin thought it was time to go see Ravyn, visiting hours we almost up. He said his goodbye and started walking out. There he was. Mike. Mike stopped and tugged on Justin’s shirt. Justin turned around and gave Mike a blank stare.

“You better be careful where you walk from now on, I know where you live,” Mike threatened. “Too busy shooting up on crack to even care about Sarah passing out, and call yourself a friend to her, friends don’t let other friends fuck themselves up.” Justin could feel the gun in the holster on his chest and wanted to pull it on Mike so bad, but new this wasn’t the place. Instead he growled back at Mike.

“Hey fuck you trying to act like a big gangster. You’re a fraud just like your insurance. And you act like your all tough, you had the chance to shoot me but pussied out. Your just a faggot ass bi…” he was interrupted by Sarah.

“I’ll deal with you later.” Mike looked back to Justin and let go of his shirt. Justin said his goodbyes to Sarah as Sarah simply smiled.

Justin was pissed the whole way to his car and peeled out in his high horse power car not caring if cops had a problem with it. He needed to see Ravyn anyway.

He arrived at the jail and was shown where to go. He sat at the table and Ravyn came. She looked like she had been crying and scared. Justin didn’t know her well, and figured she would freak out. At the same time Justin knew he wasn’t doing this for her. He had fucked up so much in life he figured he had to do at least one thing right in his life. Bring down Mike. He had so many questions to ask and wanted to know everything. Ravyn sat down. “Hi you may not know me…a matter of fact we only kind of met once…but I am here to help. Mike is evil I need to know if he was involved and I need to know everything that happened.” Justin and Ravyn sat and talked.

“Who could that be.” He said to himself before realizing something…It was B.T. from Zero Life.

“BT!” Justin yelled into the phone.

“Hey man what’s up sorry about not returning calls I…”

“Its okay I understand…”Justin said before Brandon could finish.

“Anyway VH1 wants to do a Behind The Music on Zero Life. They said they have heard a bunch of stories but want to know the really sad and true story. Also Sony wants us to do 3 concerts.”

“I would love to do them all.”

“Great first week of August…”

“What?!” Justin exclaimed.

“Its been scheduled for a long time and we didn’t think you would do it we were just gonna do the show and replace you on stage.” BT said slowly and ashamed.

“What?” Justin’s heart dropped.

“We figured you had a grudge…and we are all sorry.”

“Don’t be I ruined all our dreams, so what they want 3 shows?”

“Yeah, Zero Life had high demand or something they will let us off contract without paying anymore penalty fees if we do three. One in New York, one in Los Angles and on in Indianapolis. August 4th, 5th, and 7th. The show will be filmed the 2nd and showed on TV the 8th.”

“That’s all kinda fast.”

“Yeah man but they want it all done by the anniversary of our album. I guess.”

“Count me in…”

“By the way the NY one will be on MTV2 Live and LA will be Fuse Live”

“Are we gonna practice at all before the shows?”

“My advice…practice the whole album we will meet up the 1st in L.A. and practice then record the show the 2nd .”

“Okay just get me a ticket from Sony and I will be there.” Justin was trying to contain his excitement.

“Okay well I got to go.”

Justin forgot about everything and went and played the whole Zero Life album on guitar. It wasn’t until about 11 P.M. He thought of Sarah again. He decided he would visit her tomorrow again. Chances are Mike wouldn’t be there.