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Posted

Instead of getting annoyed at these bible-pushing thumpers, have fun with it! Last time one of those things came to my door, I went along with it for quite a ways. I invited him in, made some coffee. We laughed, talked, and expressed the wonders of Jesus. For about 20 minutes, quite amusing. Then I confronted him about my atheism, and he looked absolutely crestfallen, and was like, "oh..I should go."

 

Now that I look back on it, it was probably a nasty thing to do, but at the time it was hella fun. It was all I could to to keep from bursting out laughing.

:D
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Posted
I can see where you're coming from, phreakwars. Because just saying "I'm sorry but I'm not interested due to my religious beliefs. God Bless You and have a nice day" would have been too much to ask. Riiiight.
Posted
I can see where you're coming from, phreakwars. Because just saying "I'm sorry but I'm not interested due to my religious beliefs. God Bless You and have a nice day" would have been too much to ask. Riiiight.

 

And why couldn't the bible thumper leave him alone in the first place. I don't remeber any religious texts that say "Force thine religion down the throats of thine fellow man, for he will go to hell without it." Wanna know why that isn't in any religious texts I can think of...well, that I have read, anyway? BECAUSE THERE IS NO NEED! IF THEY KNOW ABOUT YOUR STUPID, FUCKED UP, I-HAVE-TO-FORCE-THIS-BULLSHIT-DOWN-PEOPLES'-THROATS-BECAUSE-I-AM-A-FUCKING-NIMROD-WHO-HATES-DIVERSITY, AND JUST GENERALLY RETARDED RELIGION, THEN THEY WOULD HAVE JOINED ALREADY! Buddha, people like you piss me off. Know why? You act like fuck-wits who try to convert you and make your life harder by having to answer a door and miss part of judge judy deserve your respect, or your politeness. They don't.

RoyalOrleans is my real dad!
Posted

Another thing you can do is beat them at their own game

 

FACT: according to the Jehovah's witness's religion (these are usually the ones who do the door to door soliciting) there are only 10,000 places in heaven. We all know there were much more than 10,000 jehovah's witnesses in history. REMIND THE NEXT PREACHER OF THIS.

All bullshit, No Business.
Posted

Next time they come back, I suggest you get your house red flagged.

If you do something really horrible they make a note to not come back for like... 10 years. And when they come back if you still live there you get flagged again. It's beautiful.

I want to report a double murder. If you go one mile east on Columbus Parkway to the public park, you will find kids in a brown car. They were shot with a 9mm Luger. I also killed those kids last year. Good bye

 

Brooks, I like you. Now get out of here. Go home.

Posted

I live in a restrictive community, we have signs that say no soliciting. Of course it depends on how you define soliciting whether it applies to assholes like this. The last people that came to my door, I cut them off in mid sentence, told them there was no soliciting and if they didn't get off my lawn I would call the police on them. I then went straight out to my garage and turned on my sprinkler system in the hopes they had taried a little longer and would get wet, the first zone that comes on would have soaked them before they could get to the road.

 

Back during the whole Waco mess with the Branch Davidians, I had a couple fresh faced young men come to my door. I never open the door, I just talk through it, they said their names were brother something or other and they wanted to share their bible bullshit with me, I told them I was a Branch Davidian and that I was armed. I also once again told them that it was posted they were not allowed in my apartment complex and that I was going to call the campus police. I lived at University of Texas at Arlington at the time.

 

I have no discussions with these people. I have heard it all, don't want to hear another word. I owe them no politeness, they have intruded on my private time at home with no invitation. I could have reacted worse and answered the door with a shotgun in my hand, maybe I will try that next time. That should leave an indeliable memory.

 

I'm with you phreak, that just pisses me off to the max. I mean what kind of arrogance does it take for anyone to think they have all the answers and that me for instance is clueless and has never heard of the bullshit they spew??

I am a pathetic piece of shit leeching single mom.
Posted
I have no discussions with these people. I have heard it all, don't want to hear another word. I owe them no politeness, they have intruded on my private time at home with no invitation. I could have reacted worse and answered the door with a shotgun in my hand, maybe I will try that next time. That should leave an indeliable memory.

 

I wonder if this the shotgun thing would get you one of them there "red flags" that ParasiteGod was talking about.:rolleyes:

Posted

Not in Texas.

 

They do serve a purpose though. Had to live in town for a while. All the little ole Ladies would look forward to those young men coming around to talk to them. The ladies didn't have much to say about the actual discussions, just that they talked for hours.

Posted

I live in Florida now so maybe the shock of me opening up the door and them staring down the barrel of a pistol grip shotgun would fix my problem. I have even thought of getting one of those nice bronze signs that says no soliciting please but it just seems way to polite for my taste.

My front door doesn't have a peep hole so I will be installing one this week so I can see them before they see me. As it stands now I just yell 'who is it'. But of course by then they know I'm home. I would rather some people have no idea.

I am a pathetic piece of shit leeching single mom.
Posted
-"Who is it?"

 

-"The bringers of enlightenment"

 

-"Ok, me and my chrome-spiked dildo will be right with you"

 

 

 

Whats so hard about that? :p

 

I think shoving the barrel of a shotgun right up in under their nose and saying politely "get off my property" would be alot more fun.

 

I wonder if in spite of gods protection and shining love they would shit their pants in fear...

I am a pathetic piece of shit leeching single mom.
Posted
I live in Florida now so maybe the shock of me opening up the door and them staring down the barrel of a pistol grip shotgun would fix my problem. I have even thought of getting one of those nice bronze signs that says no soliciting please but it just seems way to polite for my taste.

My front door doesn't have a peep hole so I will be installing one this week so I can see them before they see me. As it stands now I just yell 'who is it'. But of course by then they know I'm home. I would rather some people have no idea.

I've seen a house sign that says something to the effect of the house being protected by Smith and Wesson.

Posted
Just about an hour ago, my daughter and I heard the doorbell. By the time we got too the door the child that was knocking was already walking away. My daughter says she doesn't know her. In her hands were some kind of papers, religious bullshit no doubt. Her Mother was in the street waiting on her with another baby in the stroller. We watched through the curtains as she went to the next house and the next and the next. Do people have no shame pulling their children into this as well??
I am a pathetic piece of shit leeching single mom.

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