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Posted

I don't know if I posted this in the right category, but whatever.

 

Taken from http://www.hogwild.net

 

 

 

I've never used sex toys. Unless you count the time I was 13 years old and masturbated to Teela.

 

Okay, I didn't really yankee my spanky to Teela. But I did create a highly perverted story of her getting gangbanged by He-Man, Skeletor, and Optimus Prime.

 

Isn't that every girl's dream? To be banged by

 

- A steroid-using freak whose best friend is an Orko

 

- A guy who hasn't gotten laid in so long his whole BODY is blue and by a

 

- Robot/truck?

 

That's all you need to know about the differences between men and women, right there. As children, girls dress up dolls for their wedding while boys smash their toys together in a violent orgy.

 

That's why as kids, boys don't let girls play with them. Because they will ruin our violent, perverted fun!

 

And girls refuse to let boys play because they will disrupt the tea party with shooting and humping.

 

One time my mom made me play with a girl at her house. This is what happened:

 

Girlie Doll 1: Thank you for attending my banquet!

 

G.I. Joe: I am here to discuss a peace settlement.

 

Girlie Doll 2: Would you like a biscuit?

 

G.I. Joe: I'd like a pizza.

 

Girlie Doll 1: You can't have pizza at a banquet, silly goose!

 

G.I. Joe: What did you call me?!! That's it! I'm calling for back-up!

 

I dump 12 soldiers, 2 tanks, and a large panther on the table.

 

Girlie Doll 2: Oh, more guests! Welcome to our --

 

G.I. Joe: Attack!!!!!

 

I make furious laser shooting sounds, spit flying everywhere. The tanks knock over the tea cups. The panther is humping everything he can get his paws on.

 

MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHM!!!! Make him STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHP!!! He's humping and shooting!

 

My mom: Play nice! No humping and shooting!

 

 

lol, I thought it was funny....

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Posted

Looks like Chi got in good graces with our neighborhood commie...so far. That's quite the task. :rolleyes:

 

Nice joke btw.

"I wish I was in Tijuana, eating barbecued iguana." - Wall of Voodoo

 

http://www.sucksbbs.net/data/MetaMirrorCache/fb910e0baa5b4e108ffee98f66cdb3cc.gif

Posted
Men have a penis and women have a vagina. That's all we need to know... we're introverts or extroverts.

To be the Man, you've got to beat the Man. - Ric Flair

 

Everybody knows I'm known for dropping science.

Posted
Looks like Chi got in good graces with our neighborhood commie...so far. That's quite the task. :rolleyes:

 

Nice joke btw.

 

So commies are the women haters? or........?

.
Posted

If you read KVH's sig, he is a commie supporter and doesn't like women.

 

Still a cool poster though, the guy's a riot!

"I wish I was in Tijuana, eating barbecued iguana." - Wall of Voodoo

 

http://www.sucksbbs.net/data/MetaMirrorCache/fb910e0baa5b4e108ffee98f66cdb3cc.gif

Posted
If you read KVH's sig, he is a commie supporter and doesn't like women.

 

Still a cool poster though, the guy's a riot!

 

For a young punk, it would appear that he didn't go to school just to eat his lunch.

Persevere,

it pisses people off.

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