Do really fat people bother you to look at?

emkay64

New member
There's also the assumption that just because the buffet is "all you can eat" that everyone who walks through the door will eat all they can. It is possible that they will control their portions better than the supposed "healthy weight" person.

(though not probable... and not because of the obese factor, but because of the value factor- even skinny ******* like me tend to overeat when it's a free for all, but I hate that overstuffed feeling, so I avoid making myself feel that way... most of the time :) )
Irresponsibility and food just doesn't really fit. I mean..you have confessed to eating an entire tub of artichoke dip lol. You are skinny and therefore not irresponsible..or are you? Cancer has been linked to consumption of red meat. Therefore if you eat steak are you irresponsible? It just doesn't work. I don't like the word, it's semantics I guess..but if you go with straight labels yes..the person at the buffet is irresponsible, but by definition we ALL are then.

 

emkay64

New member
Being skinny can lead to heart problems, bone density loss, loss of periods etc etc...I'm not saying I'm an advocate for the obese...but there are plenty of illnesses with the other end of the scale too. I did liken it to drug addiction..in that it's an addict mentality. I can agree with you feeling it's irresponsible..just not sure it fits really. If you are medically healthy..as you said you were TJ...do you feel you need to get thin? Are you irresponsible if you have sour cream on your potato tonight KNOWING you are overweight? Is there any need to be thin if you are healthy as is? Do you see what I mean?
 

mercury

New member
Tub? LOLOLOLOLOL Tub implies that it's one of those little deli containers... which it's not. It's usually a full 2 qt casserole!

I don't claim to be responsible when it comes to food. I look healthy and fit, and for the most part, I am... but I make HORRIBLE food choices every day. Chocolate is a food group, right? ;)

 

emkay64

New member
"Addiction is addiction, most addictions are from severe depression issues so are you saying it is better to let people languish under the results of deep depression than to admit some people are not acting responsibly? "

--------------------------------------------------

I never said this..and in fact I agreed with you to a degree.

 

emkay64

New member
Tub? LOLOLOLOLOL Tub implies that it's one of those little deli containers... which it's not. It's usually a full 2 qt casserole!

I don't claim to be responsible when it comes to food. I look healthy and fit, and for the most part, I am... but I make HORRIBLE food choices every day. Chocolate is a food group, right? ;)
You're adorable and thin. If you were fat you would get disdain. Because you are thin you have a healthy appetite lol. If you were fat you would be disgusting and irresponsible. Chocolate should be a food group lol.

 

emkay64

New member
My link

I'm not being argumentative. I'm challenging you to see if it is media induced hatred by some or if as in the above study..is it really worth it if everything iis okay when you are in fact obese. I'm not saying all fat is healthy...but for some it is. Medical experts can't explain why either. However in the study 13% had deteriorating health profiles after the weight loss..it's interesting. I'm challenging you about irresponsibility and the media. That's all. I'm not saying people need to languish in depression TJ for pete's sake.

I agree that the health risks are great for the obese, but should we advise all obese people to lose weight if they are medically sound? If so...why?

 

mercury

New member
Tub? LOLOLOLOLOL Tub implies that it's one of those little deli containers... which it's not. It's usually a full 2 qt casserole!

I don't claim to be responsible when it comes to food. I look healthy and fit, and for the most part, I am... but I make HORRIBLE food choices every day. Chocolate is a food group, right? ;)
You're adorable and thin. If you were fat you would get disdain. Because you are thin you have a healthy appetite lol. If you were fat you would be disgusting and irresponsible. Chocolate should be a food group lol.
Got that right! although... don't think I'm totally free from disdain, though. The angry, bitter chubbies tend to take issues with the twig that eats like a pig. If I had a normal metabolism, I'd probably hate someone like me, too... because I'd weigh 300 lbs!

 

timesjoke

Active Members
You make a fair point TJ. However how willing are you to say that YOU are in fact irresponsible every time you put something less that calorie restricting in your mouth. If your BMI falls somewhere around 35, then medically you are considered obese and are therefore "irresponsible" even if you are healthy.
Medically the BMI is a starting point, but it does not account for factors such as large muscle mass. The BMI compares weight to height only, every body builder in the world is considered obese according to the BMI, lol.

But I do have a few extra pounds, the bad side of working out a lot in early life then stopping is we do have a difficult time keeping the weight off so I know that side of it very well, I just don't have the addiction side of it.

I don't know if that is a fair assessment. Technically..eating cake or a cookie is "irresponsible", because you COULD end up overweight. Same as smoking crack just one time could possibly make you a drug addict. You make a fair point, but it doesn't seem to fit one hundred percent. I don't know if "irresponsible" fits for food lol.
Nothing fits 100% emkay, nothing I ever say is supposed to imply a 100% perfect comment, I am just trying to stay within what is normally the cace most of the time. Yes, eating a cookie anytime could be irresponsible to a certain point of view, but if you want to take that route then we have to try and offer some kind of percentage because eating a cookie when you weight 400 pounds and have a eating disorder is a lot more irresponsible than eating a cooking when you weigh 150 pounds and don't have an eating disorder. In the former you are at 90% irresponsible while in the latter you are at 1% irresponsible.

And smoking crack could never be responsible emkay, not sure why you mention that.

 

emkay64

New member
Tub? LOLOLOLOLOL Tub implies that it's one of those little deli containers... which it's not. It's usually a full 2 qt casserole!

I don't claim to be responsible when it comes to food. I look healthy and fit, and for the most part, I am... but I make HORRIBLE food choices every day. Chocolate is a food group, right? ;)
You're adorable and thin. If you were fat you would get disdain. Because you are thin you have a healthy appetite lol. If you were fat you would be disgusting and irresponsible. Chocolate should be a food group lol.
Got that right! although... don't think I'm totally free from disdain, though. The angry, bitter chubbies tend to take issues with the twig that eats like a pig. If I had a normal metabolism, I'd probably hate someone like me, too... because I'd weigh 300 lbs!
When I was overweight, I never hated skinny people. I was jealous of the control etc..but never hated anyone. I always directed my self-loathing inside. I knew it was my fault..I knew I overate and I did it to myself. I changed because for ME I hit an all time low when Emily told me I was "sick all the time", and I have no pictures from back then..except one or two. I was cutting myself out of things and it was hurting people around me. I make no excuses for being fat, nor do I judge those who are or aren't. I'm just curious about the need to be one way if A) medically you are sound and B) you like yourself the way you are.

That is supposed to be a "B" with a bracket, but the site makes it a smilie..I really don't think I'm cool lol.

 

emkay64

New member
Well for me..my answer is. If you are a healthy overweight person, then do not lose weight if you are healthy and comfortable with who you are. If you are obese and hosts a series of health issues and are unhappy..I would say that maybe you need a management program. Externals honestly aren't a big issue for me. Health wise is a different story. Anyone that eats like a pig is disgusting to me, fat people don't get all my disgust. I'm an equal opportunity hater. I believe the media is a huge influence and I am sick of plastic norms. I am not judgmental enough to tell someone they need to change who they are if medically there is no reason to. I believe in a case by case scenario. I also do not like a lot of exposed skin. It's unflattering on many and skanky for most others.

Whew..I think i answered everything.

 

mercury

New member
I've only had the issue with a few people... most people are like you- a little envious that I can eat whatever I want and not worry about fitting into my clothes afterwards. I'd kill for a few more pounds (like 15 or so...), not because I hate my body, think it's disgusting or anything like that (although, I don't necessarily enjoy counting my ribs or think they are attractive..) but because I'd like to buy just one pair of jeans that don't require a belt to keep them up!

And don't be jealous of the control! I think I've explained that there isn't any on my part... just blessed with some good fat burning genes.

 

mercury

New member
Well for me..my answer is. If you are a healthy overweight person, then do not lose weight if you are healthy and comfortable with who you are. If you are obese and hosts a series of health issues and are unhappy..I would say that maybe you need a management program. Externals honestly aren't a big issue for me. Health wise is a different story. Anyone that eats like a pig is disgusting to me, fat people don't get all my disgust. I'm an equal opportunity hater. I believe the media is a huge influence and I am sick of plastic norms. I am not judgmental enough to tell someone they need to change who they are if medically there is no reason to. I believe in a case by case scenario. I also do not like a lot of exposed skin. It's unflattering on many and skanky for most others.

Whew..I think i answered everything.
I'm in total agreement with this.

 

timesjoke

Active Members
When I was overweight, I never hated skinny people. I was jealous of the control etc..but never hated anyone. I always directed my self-loathing inside. I knew it was my fault..I knew I overate and I did it to myself. I changed because for ME I hit an all time low when Emily told me I was "sick all the time", and I have no pictures from back then..except one or two. I was cutting myself out of things and it was hurting people around me.
I don't want to be insulting or insensitive so if this starts getting too personal for you please say so and I will gladly drop it but you are sharing some things that seem relivent to my point here.

So you admit there was great depression connected to your weight and only a 'kick in the pants' from your daughter was able to get you out of that self-destructive cycle? So while you were in that depressive state, and you were showing signs of depression so clearly, did anyone else try to talk to you and get you the help you needed or did they all stand back and watch you eat yourself into greater depression without comment?

My point is when people are so obviously depressed, maybe a little honesty combined with some help getting past the depression is better than politically correct silence that leaves the obese suffering with that depression......maybe?

Emkay, there is no such thing as a 'health obese' person. Even the study you posted admitted that there was a lot of unanswered questions and "While countless epidemiological studies have shown that as you move from a normal weight (BMI = 18.5-24.9 kg/m2) towards overweight (BMI = 25-29.9kg/m2) and obesity (BMI ? 30kg/m2) the risk of many diseases increases exponentially, it is also true that approximately 25% of obese individuals ­are metabolically healthy despite their excess weight."

Your own link admits only about 25% of the obese were "metabolically healthy" and that leave 75% who are not and I already covered why there is more to consider on health than just their metabolism. The quote I just posted even admits the risk of many diseases increase "exponentially" with being severely overweight so how about those disease issues that are not metabolism related?

 

emkay64

New member
No one is interested in my life so I'm not going to go into too much detail. I was depressed, I didn't care about my weight and I honestly just felt..well I didn't care. I got help from a shrink but that didn't make me change physically either, but it did help some with the depression. I'd been called fat by family before..and that didn't give me a "kick in the pants" it gave me more of a kick in the gut. I never ate in front of many people, or I ate sensibly in front of them. They pushed exercise and diets of every kind. I took diet pills and tried some less savory methods because I didn't care about me, but thought others might care more if I changed. I couldn't change for me..because honestly I just wanted to die. However..when my mirror image in miniature tells me they love me and I'm sick all the time..I felt value in changing for her. Everybody has their reasons for changing. If I felt I was happy and valuable at 200 pounds I would have stayed there, but for me..I wasn't happy.

I also believe there are healthy obese people..both in mind and body. I never deal in absolutes. Give me people in all shapes and sizes, it's real and to me that is valuable. I never hit my "goal" weight..mostly because it was a stupid goal weight. Women have unrealistic goals when it comes to weight. As I got healthier physically I grew into a real comfort with my body and I am happy to say I am the most happy now that I have ever been physically. I just don't believe we all fit a mould. What feels good for you may not fit someone else. I don't think skinny is the norm we need to strive for..I vote for healthy. Changing externally and healthfully comes from inside.

 
  • Like
Reactions: Chi

emkay64

New member
This is kinda funny. My Mom used to pick at me relentlessly for being fat. Made me try on clothes she knew I wouldn't fit, suggested multitudes of diets, used words like chunky and fat and wide etc. Made noises of disgust if I ate dessert lol...but then..when I started losing weight..like getting really close to goal..she asked me "if I had cancer"...there really was no winning in how I was perceived. I was 110 pounds in High School and 5 foot 3 and my Dad called me chunky. At some points in my life I honestly didn't know where I was supposed to be lol.
 

hugo

New member
I have always beem a responsible non-fat person. I have also always lived in a house where I knew a fire would be put out if the house caught fire.
 
Top Bottom