Ahhlee
New member
I'm haunted!!!!
By the ghosts of old paramours past! Seriously.
And it sucks.
An old boyfriend came to town for a wedding this weekend (he's the one I lost my virginity to, actually) and called me up to see if I wanted to get together. I thanked him for the offer but declined because: A) I was working. B) I just plain old didn't care to see him. So out of spite he slept with one of my employees knowing she would tell me about it and hoping it would make me jealous, which it didn't. I just hope for her sake he improved his technique over the years...haha.
Last night I got a text from an old flame out of the blue and he asked if he could call to chit-chat for awhile. I said fine, and we actually engaged in a very pleasant conversation. He did the old "I miss you" and "you always had the prettiest green eyes" and "I really want to get together and see where things go with us" routine which I took with a grain of salt because I never did fully trust him. This morning I get another text from him asking for a favor...."could I borrow $5000? There is a new truck I want and I PROMISE to pay you back at the end of the month." I said, "No. I don't have that kind of cash" (well....I do, but I'm not borrowing it to him!!!!) to which he texted...."I see. How about $3000?"
Obviously, I didn't reply back.
I'm done. I am D-U-N, Done!!!! I'm sick to death of men using me and treating me like I'm a moron and/or a pile of ****. I do not want a relationship. I do not want a man in my life. I do not need the headache or the drama from the jerks that I always seem to attract. Since I can't seem to figure out how to go about finding someone properly, I am done.
I'm still going to move and still going to have a good life. I see no reason why I can't go out and do everything I've always wanted to do on my own. This is my destiny.
Today I was excited because I actually got the evening off so I went to town to go shopping. I stopped at Barnes&Noble to get my geek on and found myself strolling past the "Relationships" aisle. As I pondered the selections there, it dawned on me that I have spent too much money on such drivel. I am embarrassed to say, I even purchased Steve Harvey's "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man" believing it would help me in my single life quandry...but none of the books I've read about love have done an ounce of good. I noticed the volumes of books geared to help hopeless, pathetic, insecure people like me find a mate and I vowed right then and there never to spend another red cent on that garbage again. I only attract jerks!!! Why in the **** should I invest time helping him find his core being when he's just going to try to destroy mine? Why would I want to read up on ways to please him when my own needs are just going to be viewed as insignificant? Why invest in stock that yields no return and only causes heartache?
No more. I don't care what society, the Bible, or millions of years of evolution and genetic conditioning say....I'm going it alone from this point on.
Does my new inner awakening affect anyone here at this site? Absolutely not. Should any of you care? No. You don't need to.
But it felt good to rant and get this off my chest. So feel free to use this post to rant about whatever you want.
By the ghosts of old paramours past! Seriously.
And it sucks.
An old boyfriend came to town for a wedding this weekend (he's the one I lost my virginity to, actually) and called me up to see if I wanted to get together. I thanked him for the offer but declined because: A) I was working. B) I just plain old didn't care to see him. So out of spite he slept with one of my employees knowing she would tell me about it and hoping it would make me jealous, which it didn't. I just hope for her sake he improved his technique over the years...haha.
Last night I got a text from an old flame out of the blue and he asked if he could call to chit-chat for awhile. I said fine, and we actually engaged in a very pleasant conversation. He did the old "I miss you" and "you always had the prettiest green eyes" and "I really want to get together and see where things go with us" routine which I took with a grain of salt because I never did fully trust him. This morning I get another text from him asking for a favor...."could I borrow $5000? There is a new truck I want and I PROMISE to pay you back at the end of the month." I said, "No. I don't have that kind of cash" (well....I do, but I'm not borrowing it to him!!!!) to which he texted...."I see. How about $3000?"
Obviously, I didn't reply back.
I'm done. I am D-U-N, Done!!!! I'm sick to death of men using me and treating me like I'm a moron and/or a pile of ****. I do not want a relationship. I do not want a man in my life. I do not need the headache or the drama from the jerks that I always seem to attract. Since I can't seem to figure out how to go about finding someone properly, I am done.
I'm still going to move and still going to have a good life. I see no reason why I can't go out and do everything I've always wanted to do on my own. This is my destiny.
Today I was excited because I actually got the evening off so I went to town to go shopping. I stopped at Barnes&Noble to get my geek on and found myself strolling past the "Relationships" aisle. As I pondered the selections there, it dawned on me that I have spent too much money on such drivel. I am embarrassed to say, I even purchased Steve Harvey's "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man" believing it would help me in my single life quandry...but none of the books I've read about love have done an ounce of good. I noticed the volumes of books geared to help hopeless, pathetic, insecure people like me find a mate and I vowed right then and there never to spend another red cent on that garbage again. I only attract jerks!!! Why in the **** should I invest time helping him find his core being when he's just going to try to destroy mine? Why would I want to read up on ways to please him when my own needs are just going to be viewed as insignificant? Why invest in stock that yields no return and only causes heartache?
No more. I don't care what society, the Bible, or millions of years of evolution and genetic conditioning say....I'm going it alone from this point on.
Does my new inner awakening affect anyone here at this site? Absolutely not. Should any of you care? No. You don't need to.
But it felt good to rant and get this off my chest. So feel free to use this post to rant about whatever you want.
Just the airfare to get to where we'd be drinking thos exotic liquors (first class, of course). 
