...my last resort...

Good God, thats terrible. All i have to say is this, the lpf boards, although being a pretty good place for advice, isnt the place for this. Get in touch with some sorta family psychologist, and get this all straightened out. But for now, try to forgive and forget. You cant waste the time that you could be spending with your family, get to know them because you dont know when they'll be gone.
 
ok...what the **** am i supposed to do...i feel like an anvil is on my heart...

last night was the scarriest night i've ever been through...

yesterday started fine...i spent the day at my moms...we talked and "bonded" and it was good...whell then my sister called and my mom asks when she'll be there...and being mandy she said she didnt know...

whell my mom got a call...a few of her friends wanted her to go and have a drink with them...so my mkom asks me and i say sure...kuz i know what thats like...

whell...my sister finaly gets there...and gets all mad cuz my mom isnt home yet...

thn my mom gets home...and i move into my room to watch tv...whell soon i hear raised voices (mainly mandy YELLING at my mom...) then i hear a smack... i walk out and find my mom with a small handprint acrost her face... whell i see that and start yellin at mandy that she cannot do what she did...so she goes and calles my dad... then she gathers her stuff and heads to the door...i block the way...so she bites me (that is gunna be an interesting bruse) so i backhand her... so mandy goes out the back door to wait for my dad...meanwhile my mom calls and says to my dad that they need to talk... mandy her and him...l so i wait for them to walk in the door...they get to yelling at each other... then my dad walks out as my mom is mid scentance...i lost it then and went storming out of the house after my dad... and start yelling at him... how he never conciders moms side of the story...and **** like that...

well then thay leave and my mom and i hug for a long time...she kept saying how proud she was that i did that...

after a while...i go back to my room...trying to fall asleep t music...instead listning to my mom cry herself to sleep...

i got bad after a while too...at about 2:eek:oam...i go out to the kitchen and look for a sharp knife...i wanted to cut SOO BAD...untill i found a note...sitting on the coffee table...my mom had fallen asleep on the couch ... it was a suicide note... scared i stop and listen to my mom...she was still breathing... so i woke her up... and ask if she has tried anything yet...she hadent ...no slit wrists...no ODing... so i sat there with her...and just criied...both of us just balling...in eachothers arms... and i talked her out of killing herself...

and today i got back to my house...and immediatly left for a friends house...i had no deire to be neer mandy or my dad...

i called my mom earlier today...and whell she picked up the phone so i know she hasnt done anything rash yet...and she assures me that she wont....but i cant help but fear...


so i'm just wondering what do i do??...
 
yeah...everytime i think about how she feels...i cry cuz i know exactly what that is like... feeling like you wanna die...i know that feeling intimatly...
 
***hugs***
***hugs**
and more **hugs**

just settle down ok??? this is a hard positon to be in (as in u).....has ur mum gone to a councillor??? or tried yoga or medition to calm her down???
 
yeah, that's really tough, for you and your mom. It's great for her that you can be so strong, but you can't be strong for both of you, or you'll be drained... There's not much advice I can give you, I just respect you a lot, it takes a lot of courage to be in your position right now. Just be by your moms side, and maybe your whole family could go to a family therapy session, so things will be better in the future. I honestly hope everything will be alright, be strong man. Things will look up.
 
How old is your sister anyway?! If she's like a teen then I guess that's kinda what teens do (thought not as bad), but if she's older, then she should know better and shouldn't be doing crap like that o_0 I would too beat the hell out of her but as they always say, violence is not the answer!
Umm I think that your mum needs some kinda help with her wanting to commit suicide and all. Do you have any other family members who you can trust? Talk to them. Just talk to someone. Anyway, just be there for her, tell her you love her :) That should be reassuring.
My suggestion is that your sister needs anger management! She needs to be talked to about what the hell she's doing and why she's hurting your mum like that >.<
And your dad? Ohh well forget about him. He obviously doesn't care.
Your family sounds like you're going through a lot of problems. Maybe the best way is to all sit down as a family and talk about them. I don't know.
Anyway you sound incredibly brave for going through all of this yourself and I admire you for that. You haven't done anything wrong in the situation. Remember non of it's your fault and it shouldn't even be your problem to fix. Hopefully things will go well for you! Just keep your head up and do your best! Good luck. Things will get better.
 

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