waiting4thesun
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- Feb 4, 2006
- Location
- Earth
i don't care if no one reads this, i just need to get it off my chest.
so. i'm still in love with my first girlfriend.
we started going out march 17th, of this year. she broke up with me exactly one week after our one month anniversary. i thought i'd be able to get over her, and just move on. i sort of did, but my feelings never really went away. i just ignored them, thinking it was totally over, no chance, i might as well move on with my life. so i did, and since then i've had 5 other girlfriends. none of them meant what she meant to me.
a bit of information, she goes to my old middle school, which i live right next door to. so, after i get home from school, i'll sometimes go over and hang out on the playground, where everyone is. including her.
so on friday, after about a week of mental torture caused by suddenly thinking about her a lot more, i finally told her that i still love her. (this is over instant messanger, btw. i don't get to see her much, so i chat with her) she said that she was in a threeway tug-of-war with her heart; two guys both named adam, and me. turns out, she was still in love with me too. so after talking for a while, i asked her to go out with me. she said yes, and i was happier than i've ever been. i was happier than when we were first going out. i was more than in love with her.
so we chatted for a good while longer, and then i had to get off. saturday was the same, i woke up, got showered and dressed, and then got on the computer and chatted with her for a good long time. i then had to leave to go to my friend's house, for a band meeting. we got there mid-afternoon, and spent the night until noon today (sunday). while i was there, i thought about her so much. we (me and the guys from the band) took a walk at night, and went to this open area and looked at the stars for a while, and i couldn't stop thinking how much better it would've been if she'd been there, in my arms.
at about noon, my mom came to the house i was at and picked me up, and i came home. i got on the computer as soon as i could, because i really wanted to talk to her. i get on, and sign on to AIM, and she's online but not there. so i waited until she gets back, and then after a few IMs, she told me that she still likes one of the adam guys. after that, we chatted for a little while, just trying to not make it awkward. after a while (and a long silence), i told her that i had to get off, and i signed off, and that was it.
i haven't cried in a very long time (years), but right now, i feel like crying for an hour or two. i don't think i'm gonna, but that's how ****ed up i feel right now.
even after being heartbroken by her twice, i still love her more than anything.
ok, i'm done now.
so. i'm still in love with my first girlfriend.
we started going out march 17th, of this year. she broke up with me exactly one week after our one month anniversary. i thought i'd be able to get over her, and just move on. i sort of did, but my feelings never really went away. i just ignored them, thinking it was totally over, no chance, i might as well move on with my life. so i did, and since then i've had 5 other girlfriends. none of them meant what she meant to me.
a bit of information, she goes to my old middle school, which i live right next door to. so, after i get home from school, i'll sometimes go over and hang out on the playground, where everyone is. including her.
so on friday, after about a week of mental torture caused by suddenly thinking about her a lot more, i finally told her that i still love her. (this is over instant messanger, btw. i don't get to see her much, so i chat with her) she said that she was in a threeway tug-of-war with her heart; two guys both named adam, and me. turns out, she was still in love with me too. so after talking for a while, i asked her to go out with me. she said yes, and i was happier than i've ever been. i was happier than when we were first going out. i was more than in love with her.
so we chatted for a good while longer, and then i had to get off. saturday was the same, i woke up, got showered and dressed, and then got on the computer and chatted with her for a good long time. i then had to leave to go to my friend's house, for a band meeting. we got there mid-afternoon, and spent the night until noon today (sunday). while i was there, i thought about her so much. we (me and the guys from the band) took a walk at night, and went to this open area and looked at the stars for a while, and i couldn't stop thinking how much better it would've been if she'd been there, in my arms.
at about noon, my mom came to the house i was at and picked me up, and i came home. i got on the computer as soon as i could, because i really wanted to talk to her. i get on, and sign on to AIM, and she's online but not there. so i waited until she gets back, and then after a few IMs, she told me that she still likes one of the adam guys. after that, we chatted for a little while, just trying to not make it awkward. after a while (and a long silence), i told her that i had to get off, and i signed off, and that was it.
i haven't cried in a very long time (years), but right now, i feel like crying for an hour or two. i don't think i'm gonna, but that's how ****ed up i feel right now.
even after being heartbroken by her twice, i still love her more than anything.
ok, i'm done now.
