Restaurant etiquette 101

[Vortex]

I agree 100%. If servers would just remember my condiments, they would get a higher tip.

I personally always remember my condiments....always...its my job....Unless you are a total asshole..then i dont mind delaying it....perhaps you are this type and your server does it to you on purpose?

To me, the server has to EARN their tip. If they forget anything, it will be deducted, especially even more so if I don't get an apology.

How typical of the customer that thinks they are the only table in the entire restarurant! Now if a GOOD server gets delayed in getting something to the table they will know immediately before you even ask and run to the back to get it for you...and apologize as they are giving it to you!..No respectable server will not apologize..which makes me wonder...do you consider fast food as table service?

I also don't like when servers bring me a refill I NEVER ordered.

Sorry, but you are in the minority on this one! I refill my customers drinks without asking when they are about one third of the way through the meal...then i start asking. I dont know about you, but the slurping sound at the end of your glass then cranking your neck to find your server is far more annoying than a full glass in front of you!.. Now isnt it?!?!

Sometimes I just don't want anymore drink and sometimes I actually want to switch soft drinks.

then say so stupid....your server is there to do what you want....They are refilling your (FREE) beverage because that what your ordered!! If you want something different, then grow some balls and when they take your emptyish glass that you want something different.....that is what your server is for.....Keep in mind, like the majority of the human population, that servers failed (just like you) Mind Reading 101......

I wish servers could let the CUSTOMER'S order for THEMSELVES. I also think that a good server wouldn't go buss a table before doing a request. One time a waiter at Applebees decided to buss a table with my credit card and receipt in his hand which was making us wait to leave.

AWwwwww...thats too bad that your server thought a clean table to write your nonexistant tip would suffice...

There is NO need to make a customer wait for clean up work.

SO you are the one in a million customer that would like a totaly dirty table with tons of dirty dishes at the table? Sorry but your in the minority on that one...customers CONSANTLY complain that you arent taking dishes away from the table...

There is something else that also bugs me, when servers go to get your order, then go to 2 other tables to ask them how they are doing. I wish they would just go IN ORDER .

A good server will go in order...to the best of their ability. Think of it backwards.....you sit down...see a server taking orders and drink orders and running those pesky condiments you are willing to remove the tip if they forget....and you are the last one seated...yet your server is taking awhile to get to you. You get annoyed right? They are trying to communicate something to you....you knkow what that is???? THAT THEY GIVE A CRAP ABOUT YOU....ooops sorry to yell. But look at it from the backwards perspective...

Your server is trying to please everyone at the same time...even if they get an asshole like you at their table..they still want to please you...trust me they do!

If I am at table 6 and ask for refills, it isn't right to make my table to wait for refills while you go to 2 other tables. It's like "What's the POINT?" If the server isn't fiinshed with the other people, why did they bother asking my table if we wanted anything else.

It means you need to grow up....apparently you haven tyet

If I was a server, I'd write down each request and go in order as they come.

if you did, you wouldnt get any tips..and you wouldnt make it in the service industry....Im gonna dare you, before you exit puberty, to wait tables...for at least 1 month...then post again....

Obviously, if the food was ready for a table, I'd have to bring the food since it was ordered before the next request. For instance, if I am serving tables: 5, 7, and 3. If I just got a request for some refills for table 7 and table's 5 order is ready. I would get table 5's food order 1st and then get table 7's refills because table 5 did order their food before table 7's refills. Now after I bring table 5's order, they ask for a side of ranch. I would go get table 7's refills BEFORE the ranch because the refills were request before the ranch. Basically what I am saying is that I would go in the order things come in a like a line.

Not really..you would do it all at the same time...but who am i? Nothing but a SERVANT..not a server..right?


I could go on..but dont have the gusto...You seem to apparently watch servers at their job...but only when it concerns you.......try actually watching a server wait on all of their section to try and please EVERYONE at their tables...it isnt easy...and you get assholes (like yourself) that think they deserve everything before everyoneelse...no matter how it really works!

 

[Lords]

Vortex said Unless you are a total asshole..then i dont mind delaying it....perhaps you are this type and your server does it to you on purpose?

I am nice. I actually say thank you and ASK "Can I have a refill?" I don't just say Coke, I actually be nice about it. This can be an example of when I order: Cheeseburger with just lettuce and onions only with 2 sides of mayonnaise and 1 side of mustard. I went to Chilis on friday which I ordered a cheeseburger and the food runner brought out my food WITHOUT my condiments. I feel it is the SERVER'S responsibility to bring out my condiments before the meal if they have other people that are running their food. ONLY the server knows, NOT the food runner. I DEFINATELY wouldn't depend on the cook for my tip if I was the server, I would take charge of my destiny and make a good tip by bringing the condiments ahead of time. I acually had servers before bring my condiments before my meal because they said they didn't want to forget, now that is a CARING server to do something like that. I also feel he should have said at least a sorry, but there was none. The food runner had NO clue about my condiments. Also, my husbands meal got messed up too. They put vegetables instead of the cinnamon apples he ordered because this waiter DIDN'T write ANY of the order down. I was waiting to eat my food because I like to eat a lot of mayonnaise on my burger and I also don't like ketchup so I eat fries with mayonnaise. I think that it is wrong for you to delay ANYONE'S food. Customers should get EQUAL treatment. YOUR tip will suffer more, so WHY in the world would you want to make a bad tip. I personally would rather treat customers equal in hopes I get a better tip. Even if I made an extra buck, it's all worth treating them equally. That is what a server is SUPPOSE to do, not treat customers differently.

When I worked at the donut shop, they had video poker machines the first year I worked there. When people would win, I'd be the one that have to go in the back to give them the cash they won. MOST customers, when they'd win, they tip us like 5, 10, or even a 20 dollar bill. This one lady NEVER tipped AT ALL. I STILL treated her the EXACT same way as EVERYONE ELSE. I went in order also when she was being served. I NEVER treated other people better than her, I treated people the SAME. Yes, I KNEW she wasnt' going to tip me, but I have a heart and CAN'T be mean to people just because they didn't tip me. This lady was a regular, not everyday, but came in a lot. I had to count the money at least 2 times, once in the back and once to the customer. I did the RIGHT thing and treated her like gold, just like EVERYONE else. So, I think it looks like you are the one that is the mean person treating people differently. Like you said, it is YOUR JOB to remember the condiments, so if you don't do your job well, your tip may go down. WHY would you want that to happen? WOULDN'T you want to make that extra money, like instead of 18%, they'd give you 20%?

Vortex said How typical of the customer that thinks they are the only table in the entire restarurant!

I DON'T think that at ALL. Just like you said

personally always remember my condiments....always...its my job....

Well then if it is YOUR job, if you don't do it correctly, obviously if a customer doesn't take off for it, the next time you get these customers you may say to yourself "Gee, they don't take off if I mess up, so WHY bother trying?" WHY reward someone for messing up? I want to PREVENT the mistake from happening EVER again. Some people have said the server may not know why I reduced the tip, but I TRULY think they know if they forget something that it is a mistake. If the server forgets something, it SHOULD be taken off. The server, if there is no food runner running the food at the time, reread the order they wrote down BEFORE they bring the food out. I WOULDN'T put my trust into the cook. They aren't the one's getting tipped.

Vortex said then say so stupid....your server is there to do what you want......They are refilling your (FREE) beverage because that what your ordered![/QUOTE

NO, the server should come and ASK the customer if they want more drink. WHY did you say this

They are refilling your (FREE) beverage because that what your ordered!

? Uhh, I DIDN'T order another drink. The server ASSUMES that I want another of the same drink instead of just asking FIRST. The server is making a decision for the customer, they have NO RIGHT to order for the customer. I SHOULDN'T have to tell them that they need to come ask me, they should let me order for MYSELF. I ordered 1 soft drink, NOT a refill. The server does this so they don't have to make another trip to come ask the customer which shows that they don't CARE about the customer, they only care about not making their feet more tired. If the server cared about what the CUSTOMER wants, there would be no automatic refilling of drinks without asking.

Vortex said Keep in mind, like the majority of the human population, that servers failed (just like you) Mind Reading 101......

NO, they are trying to read the CUSTOMER'S mind by getting them a drink that TRUTHFULLY and HONESTLY you don't know that they want. HOW can you know for SURE if you don't ASK? YOU DON'T, so you are mind reading. WHAT in the world is so hard about ASKING? Sounds like LAZINESS to me that you don't want to make another trip to please the customer.

Vortex said AWwwwww...thats too bad that your server thought a clean table to write your nonexistant tip would suffice...

For one thing, there were other mistakes that waiter made also like forgetting my extra bar-b-que sauce, which he didn't apologize for. Anyway, MOST people DON'T care about a clean table that is across from them when they want to leave, be for real. They want to get on with their day, not just sit there and wait for a waiter to clean up something that has NOTHING to do with their service, which this is something that could have been done RIGHT after he brought our rung up receipt. WHY delay a customer like that, WHY? Since he took the credit card and bill in his hand, WHY O' WHY did he take it if he wasn't ready for it considering he was bussing a table RIGHT across from us? If he wasn't ready to ring our bill up, WHY did he bother to pick up the credit card and bill then? THAT didn't make ANY sense. He should have just went to ring up the bill and THEN, bussed the table.

iVortex said if you did, you wouldnt get any tips

I would, because when I did go in order, I DID get tips when I worked at the diner/donut shop. I served food to booths, the counter, and 2 seater tables. I went in order, and I made tips. Also, I have seen servers go in order lots of times and I gave them a very good tip for treating me like they are suppose to.

and you get assholes (like yourself) that think they deserve everything before everyoneelse

NO, you see, you don't know me and YOU are the one that is calling people names. HOW old are you 2? I respect people enough not to be so mean, which obviously you are. NO, I don't think I deserve everything before eveyone else, I said the server should go in order. Meaning if I am at table 4 which got seated right after table 6. I would HOPE that the server would go to table 6 first since they got seated first. I would feel bad for table 6 if the server decided to go to us right after they ordered their drinks and instead of going get their drinks, the server would get our drink order. That's NOT right, the server should be going get their drinks FIRST, and then say "I'll be right back" and go and get our drink order as well as our drinks, unless it is a bar drink, then that will take more time, so that will be delayed.

Let's say if table 3 has 5 people and table 7 has 2 people. Table 7 ordered just soft drinks first, which they got seated first. I would go get table 7's drinks first. Let's say also that table 3 orders just soft drinks. Some servers would make table 7 wait for 7 drinks to be filled, that is making table 7 wait MUCH longer for ONLY 2 drinks. That is VERY UNFAIR to do that to table 7 got seated first. Table 7 SHOULDN'T have to wait for 7 soft drinks to be filled and brought to the tables, that is making the SERVER'S job easier, it ISN'T being fair at ALL to table 7. That shows that the server isn't thinking of EACH customer INDIVIDUALLY. They are looking at the situation as a group, which it SHOULD be like a line. If table 7 is first, table 7 should be served their soft drinks first.

I WOULD make tips because I WOULD put customers BEFORE side work. I would make the CUSTOMER the MOST imporant thing. Their time is MUCH more important than my side work. HONESTLY, I don't know anyone that wants to wait longer when they are hungry. If the server would go put the food order in RIGHT after it is ordered instead of going to 2 other tables, my food would be cooked that much SOONER. Server Joe Smoe beat server Jane Doe to the computer because server Jane Doe went to 2 tables before going to the computer. This means, table 5's(let's say John Doe is sitting there dining alone), order could have been in before the table that Joe Smoe's table 6, but because Jane Doe didn't go to the computer RIGHT after, table 5's order is delayed just that much more, especially, let's say both tables ordered the same dish, table 6 get's their pasta dish before table 5. It SHOULD be the other way around. Table 5's order SHOULD have been done BEFORE table 6.

 

[Lords]

Vortex, I also want to say one more thing. Just because the refill is free DOESN'T mean that it is wanted. YOU are just ASSUMING that the customer wants it.

 

[angie]

Don't you realize they are getting you the refill to SAVE TIME so your service IS FASTER?? Sheesh. If you're not paying for it, what the hell do you care?? Get a grip!

 

[Vortex]

Vortex, I also want to say one more thing. Just because the refill is free DOESN'T mean that it is wanted. YOU are just ASSUMING that the customer wants it.

Just because someone is an asshole doesnt mean i want to serve them either...


But ill give you a tip.....DONT DRINK IT.....there problem solved!!!

So your saying you would rather have an uncaring server that will not refill your beverage untill you ask....or untill they get busy and cant get to you quick enough as that spicy burrito is burning your mouth and you are slurping away at your empty drink chewing on ice cubes trying to get your servers attention?

Personally id rather have a full drink i wont be drinking in front of me than not getting any refills at all!

I only refill soda's for people without asking....Iced Tea and Coffee ill ask because people put sugar and stuff in them, Lemonades i ask because they are sweet and if they dont want any more ill offer water....(plus i have to go to the bar and get the bartender to refill them which takes time away from other tables....)


Wow..never heard of someone getting all riled up because someone was trying to give them good service.....Guess its true....servers cant win

PS ill be responding to your longer post later.....now i have to go to work and expedite...i have a kitchen to run so people dont complain that their well done 12 oz ribeye isnt done in 10 minutes.......

 

[Lords]

Angie said

Don't you realize they are getting you the refill to SAVE TIME so your service IS FASTER?? Sheesh. If you're not paying for it, what the hell do you care?? Get a grip!

It's NOT saving time if I don't want the refill in the first place, it's actually WASTING not only my time, but other customer's time. It is also NOT trying to see "What does the CUSTOMER want?" I care because I am getting something I didn't order to my table.

For example, I was a Red Lobster and the waiter decides to just come to my husband and I's tables to bring us refills we didn't order. I had just finished telling my husband before the waiter arrived at our table that I wanted coke instead of dr. pepper this time. Sure enough he brings dr. pepper. I NEVER ordered a second dr. pepper? He WASTED his time, my time, the other customer's time, product of the company, and another glass that has to be washed. If the server actually CARED about what the CUSTOMER wants, they would ASK. WHY should the server order for me? WHAT gives them that right? It's the CUSTOMER'S job to order, NOT the STAFF.

Vortex said

So your saying you would rather have an uncaring server that will not refill your beverage untill you ask

HOW is that uncaring? It is UNCARING to ONLY think of what the server has to do and NOT what the customer desires? HOW TRUTHFULLY can you answer if they want a refill or not? YOU aren't a mind reader, YOU have NO CLUE. Yes, a lot of times I do want the same drink, but sometimes I feel like something different or sometimes I'm just full. I would STILL rather be asked because I am the customer, so what I want to order is what I want to order, if I even WANT to order anything else.

There are other websites on the internet about servers. One person actually said "Thank you" for giving advice about not giving refills without asking because she actually said she was suprised at how many people decline refills and how many people change drinks mid-meal. For instance, my mother-in-law likes coffee as an after dinner drink. She actually doesn't usually drink soft drinks, but if she did, you'd get her a refill of coke and she would want a coffee. This is just an example of getting refills that were NEVER ordered.

Vortex said

But ill give you a tip.....DONT DRINK IT.....there problem solved!!!

I don't want an extra glass in my way, NO THANKS. I also, more than likely, CHANGE drinks so that refill is brought to me for NOTHING. It just really irritates me that a server can't take extra steps to make sure you get what the customer wants? HOW will you know unless you ASK?

Vortex said

Wow..never heard of someone getting all riled up because someone was trying to give them good service.....Guess its true....servers cant win

HOW is that good service to order for the customer? The CUSTOMER should make that decision, NOT YOU! Good service is satisfying the CUSTOMER , NOT to satisfy the server to not make as much trips.

Vortex said

....(plus i have to go to the bar and get the bartender to refill them which takes time away from other tables....)

So, you only care about the customers as a whole and NOT for EACH INDIVIDUAL customer. So if it takes an extra minute or 2 to make sure your customer is satisfied. Also, you may be SAVING a trip to the bar to begin with, you DON'T know. Even if MOST of the time people want the same drink, that doesn't mean EVERYTIME or that they even want more drink. Let customers order for THEMSELVES.

 

[Mohammed_Rots_In_Hell]

Vortex, here is my slant...

I don't want my conversation interrupted by the wait staff.
I want my waiter within earshot at all times.

This is the typical scenario I encounter at just about any restaraunt in th US:

I sit down and peruse the menu abit. My company begins some small talk that escalates into meaningful conversation and right when I'm in the middle of some deep enlightenment I get interrupted by "What can I get you to drink?" or some other (I call it rude) interruption. Since this is so common, I try to ignore it and ask for some iced tea.

After what seems like hours, the tea arrives and the waiter interrupts the now half-restarted conversation with "Are ready to order?" again, he doesn't wait for a break in the conversation he just buts right in. Ok, that's how it's played in the US so I just order.

The conversation eventually heats back up while were waiting on the food. The tea is now out and I'm getting very thirsty. The waiter is no where to be seen. I don't really care to much but after about 10 to 15 minutes I start to get really annoyed. I don't want the mother-****er's conversation or interruptions, I just want my tea refill. So I 'll ask the busboy to go find the waiter for me (actually, the busboy is everywhere and always convienient... unfortunately he doesn't speak english, so he has to settle for this job)

Finally after being parched, and repeatedly being ignored by the waiter, he brings out the food with a very welcomed tea refill! I'm so happy, the waiter darts off and I begin to eat. Right when I begin to savor some delictable morsel I get interupted again by the same waiter with "How does everything taste?" Now I'm pissed! The asshole ignores me while I'm thirsty and wants to bother me while I'm eating!

As I'm leaving, I hear the ringing of my goofy little brother (who is a waiter) in the back of my brain "make sure you leave a 15% tip, after all he earned it!".

(I eat at home alot, BTW)

 

[Lords]

Mohammed_Rots_In_Hell sounds like you don't want ANY interruptions, I think you should stay home to eat then because the server HAS to do their job. If you don't like interruptions eat at home. I personally rather the server come to my table after I just started eating because I have had problems with my order before like food that was cold that was suppose to be hot and the wrong filling in my chimichunga or burrito. The server doesn't know that my order is cold or wrong by looking at it, so I feel it is nice that they come to ask if everything is ok. Also, tell the server that you don't like interruptions if you are that adamant about not being interrupted because you are going to be interrupted at a restaurant, sorry, but you more likely are. Also it seems like you want it both ways, you want the server to get you a refill and you don't want to be interrupted. Sorry, but its NOT that likely that that is going to happen. This is just my take on your posts. Get take out or cook, that's my advice. You seem to not be happy when you eat out. I am happy if the server thinks about the customer instead of themselves. I am happy when my food order is completely correct and I don't have to wait 10 minutes for my check to get rung up. I have had to wait 15 minutes before for the check to get rung up. I think that is TOO long for anyone to wait to leave, that's ridiculous.

 

[angie]

How the HELL are they supposed to take your order if they can't interrupt you for thirty measly seconds of your less than profound conversation? Get a grip. Lords is right, if ya don't want to be interuppted, stay in your goddamn house. Sheesh. I pity the server who gets you at their table. All I know is if it was me, you bet your ass I'd be spittin in your food.

 

[ALLAH IS GREAT]

'Tipping 10 percent and under is downright cruel. '


Damn,now I finally know why the guy was staring me almost to death.
hmmm? ain't that a bitch

 

[Mohammed_Rots_In_Hell]

How the HELL are they supposed to take your order if they can't interrupt you for thirty measly seconds of your less than profound conversation? Get a grip. Lords is right, if ya don't want to be interuppted, stay in your goddamn house. Sheesh. I pity the server who gets you at their table. All I know is if it was me, you bet your ass I'd be spittin in your food.

They're supposed to WAIT attentively for me to begin ordering like good little minimum wage servants! After all, aren't they called WAITers? When I need something they are still supposed be within calling distance. They should "Be seen and not heard". They are servants not culunary overlords!

Outside of the US, this is very common. I never get interrupted and my drinks are always refilled... So how the HELL are they supposed to do it? Use their brains, maybe?

 

[angie]

Yeah...they've got fifteen other tables to serve, and they're going to sit around and wait for you? Bull ****. You are a waiter's worst nighmare, and you deserve all the shitty treatment they give you.

 

[Mohammed_Rots_In_Hell]

Yeah...they've got fifteen other tables to serve, and they're going to sit around and wait for you? Bull ****. You are a waiter's worst nighmare, and you deserve all the shitty treatment they give you.

And they deserve all the running around I give'em without a tip!

 

[angie]

You are SUCH a dickhead. Oi.

 

[Mohammed_Rots_In_Hell]

You are SUCH a dickhead. Oi.

Thank you. BTW what is "Oi" ?

 

[angie]

Thank you. BTW what is "Oi" ?

You are welcome.
It's an expression of frustration. Like when someones says "JESUS". Never heard anyone say "Oi vey"? Hm.. Must be a NY thing. Don't live in NY but damn close.

 

[Outlaw2747]

Oi...

 

[Vortex]

They're supposed to WAIT attentively for me to begin ordering like good little minimum wage servants! After all, aren't they called WAITers? When I need something they are still supposed be within calling distance. They should "Be seen and not heard". They are servants not culunary overlords!

Outside of the US, this is very common. I never get interrupted and my drinks are always refilled... So how the HELL are they supposed to do it? Use their brains, maybe?

Well i usuually try to go to the table less than a minute from when they get seated...so there shouldnt be enough time for the meaningful conversation to start...so i dont interuppt anything but people opening their menues and pleasantries.....When its time to order ill walk up to the table and wait for them to look to my direction..or pause their conversation before i ask if they are ready....if not ill just wait till i see all menues closed...then come back...


Thinking back on the refill argument....and being conscience of what i was doing i realized i usually ask if they want a refill the first time...after that i quit asking and just do it. If the customer wants to switch to a different drink then they should say so as the glass is rising off the table.

Because people want to talk and not get interuppted, and thats how i eat out actually...but i unlike MRIH i realize my server is just doing their job. So my serving style is very low key...im not putting on a show or telling jokes or trying to entertain them . I just am like a silent ghost anticipating what my customers might need.

( some customers will start off the bat wanting to be "entertained" by joking with you and getting personal with you....these people i will switch on a very obtrusive waiting style because this is what they were looking for)

- if my table is all talking & laughing...im going to sneak in grab their glass..fill it up and leave...no one is interuppted....im not going to interupt them with something so trivial as a drink refill, if they dont want it they will say so....

-When ordering deserts ill ask if they want coffee or espresso. its a courtesy because many people like coffee/espresso with their desserts....unfortunatley they ususally forget they want it or dont realize it till they have had one bite and im taking an order at another table... Anything that requires sugar i will ask with every refil as to not upset their sugar/drink ratio

-If they order their salad sandwich Dry (or in customer speak...Dressing/condomants on the side) ill punch their order in go into the kitchen and get their dressing/mayo/etc out to the table right away....They then will have their piece of mind that they have what they asked for before the food runner gets it to the table! Same with catsup...ill put that on the table if a burger or fries are on any of the customers order

Lords you worked at a diner/donut shop? Did you have any customers who were under 80 and still had their own teeth?

 

[TheJenn88]

Wow, I don't know if I agree that people should just tip. We're paying for the meal, and your boss pays you. Whether or not you get a tip at ALL is entirely depended upon your service. Restaurant meals are extremely overpriced (incl. things like wages, to pay people, etc.), but even then, I think expecting a tip is annoying. next time y ou buy a 75-100 dollar pair of running shoes, tip an extra 15-20 dollars for that poor kid in asia who's making your shoes for $0.50. Afterall, we pay that much for a meal, and we're expected to tip?
hell, tip everyone that works hard and doesn't make enough money.

 

[Vortex]

Wow, I don't know if I agree that people should just tip. We're paying for the meal, and your boss pays you. Whether or not you get a tip at ALL is entirely depended upon your service. Restaurant meals are extremely overpriced (incl. things like wages, to pay people, etc.), but even then, I think expecting a tip is annoying. next time y ou buy a 75-100 dollar pair of running shoes, tip an extra 15-20 dollars for that poor kid in asia who's making your shoes for $0.50. Afterall, we pay that much for a meal, and we're expected to tip?
hell, tip everyone that works hard and doesn't make enough money.

Ok, great fine...remove the tip...problem solved!!!!!!!

Hardly

No one would want to wait on people.....And thus restaurants would have to increase their wages....and thus increase the prices....so that 7$ burger would now be 14bux or more.....

Plus the tip is an incentive for your server to try harder....if that was gone imagine the service you would get then....half assed and non existant....

Now you pay 15-20% of your meal...the bigger check price means the more they had to work for you....typcially


im going to guess you never had to live off of tips before ever.......