The whole gay thing.

[Anna Perenna]

There are three cases that would lead a woman to lesbianism...

1. Being too Goddamn ugly to snag even the most repulsing grabastic piece of amphibian **** out there.

2. Having been burned one too many times by some shitheel guy.

3. Attention whore.

I'm not sure if I should be taking your post seriously, but just in case:

I know the concept is hard for a devastatingly handsome man like yourself to grasp, but there are attractive women out there who don't want to sleep with you, Royal.

Take the instance of one couple I know.

One of the girls is outstandingly beautiful, and actually got married to her high school boyfriend.

The other girl in the couple isn't as beautiful, but she is in no way ugly. She was married too - she even had kids with the guy.

However, when these two met, they just totally fell in love with eachother, broke up with their husbands in as nice a way as possible, and have been together ever since. They raise the kids together in a nice house in a quiet leafy suburb and they keep to themselves.

Just like most of the lesbians I know.

Believe it or not, some women prefer other women over men. They're not in it for attention, or for any other reason than genuine attraction to other women.

You have friends?

No, I'm just pretending. I want you to think I'm cool.

 

[Outlaw2747]

You should see the bull-dyke that lives down the road from me! Goddamn... she looks like Pete Rose. She has a bumper sticker that reads "Gyno-American...".

Her live-in girlfriend is a tiny waif with hairy legs and pits. In the summer time, she's out doing yard work in her wife-beaters and beneath her arms; hairy wings flap in the breeze. I'm a little skiddish around chicks with more body hair than me.

For ****'s sake.

Alright you know what? That's just plain friggin' scary.

 

[RoyalOrleans]

I'm not sure if I should be taking your post seriously, but just in case:

You fixin' to school me, Anna? School ain't all shiny apples and learning, it's almost always leather straps and pain. Listen as I school you...

I know the concept is hard for a devastatingly handsome man like yourself to grasp, but there are attractive women out there who don't want to sleep with you, Royal.

First of all, I'm not devastatingly handsome. I am more on the side of ravishingly handsome. I mean, ****, you haven't even seen my curl-ups or bread-basket.

Second, all women want to sleep with me. They just don't know it yet.

Take the instance of one couple I know.

Is this couple related to the Bovidae family?

One of the girls is outstandingly beautiful, and actually got married to her high school boyfriend.

Latent homosexuality is comparable to feeling the need to expel a giant **** or so I am told. Unfortunately, for gay men, it gets pushed back in and then they fear the latent desire to decorate or wear sweater vests.

The other girl in the couple isn't as beautiful, but she is in no way ugly. She was married too - she even had kids with the guy.

Reminds me of the female Methodist preacher down the road. Insane ****ing person, but I'm suspicious of her devilish side. I mean, who in the hell keeps ducks pinned?

However, when these two met, they just totally fell in love with each other, broke up with their husbands in as nice a way as possible, and have been together ever since. They raise the kids together in a nice house in a quiet leafy suburb and they keep to themselves.

I'm sure the husbands decided, "What the hell...", and became butt-pirates on the S.S. Fairylander.

Just like most of the lesbians I know.

Sounds like women lick twat out of sheer spite of men, rather than from the experiences of hardship. I prefer the latter to the former, because at least there is some ****ing emotional basis.

Do you have any factual statistics that my assumptions are inaccurate? I mean, a mother****er can't go by one's personal experience alone. A mother****er needs more concrete evidence to be proven wrong.

Believe it or not, some women prefer other women over men. They're not in it for attention, or for any other reason than genuine attraction to other women.

I stand by my bull-dyke brothers when they say "I love *****", because so do I. And the trim loves me, but unfortunately there are some that will never find out.

No, I'm just pretending. I want you to think I'm cool.

I already think you're pretty cool, Anna. No need to get persnickety.

 

[Komrade Vostok Hazard]

You have friends?

There are three cases that would lead a woman to lesbianism...

1. Being too Goddamn ugly to snag even the most repulsing grabastic piece of amphibian **** out there.

and yet somehow another woman would be attracted to these mutants?

2. Having been burned one too many times by some shitheel guy.

I've seen WAY too many rug munchers use this excuse for being a rug muncher. Ladies: if you meet some guy who's a loser, GET OVER IT, AND LEARN A DAMN LESSON OR TWO. why is it we never see men running off to fairyland after having sexual frustration?

3. Attention whore.

Makes up about 99% of all dykes out there

 

[dshogan1]

How many real lesbians do you know, i said it once, and ill say it again, lesbians are not attention whores, women that pretend to be lesbians for attention, are attention whores. And RO there are many bulldykes like you speak of, but they are few and far between now adays. I mean, the bulldykes of today look more like 12 year old boys than 50 year old men.

Its homophobic mother****ers like you that make this country hard to live in for people that are genuinely homosexual and dont want to bother you at all, they dont want your attention, they dont want your pity, and most dont give a holy **** about your heterosexuality, so leave their homosexuality alone, its none of you business, i say to each his own, live and let live, they are lesbians, get the **** over it.

Im sure there are enough heterosexual sweaty fatass hair armpit white trailer trash wino bitches that want your ****, leave the bulldykes alone.

 

[RoyalOrleans]

And RO there are many bulldykes like you speak of, but they are few and far between now adays. I mean, the bulldykes of today look more like 12 year old boys than 50 year old men.

How the **** would you know that?

Its homophobic mother****ers like you that make this country hard to live in for people that are genuinely homosexual and dont want to bother you at all, they dont want your attention, they dont want your pity, and most dont give a holy **** about your heterosexuality, so leave their homosexuality alone, its none of you business, i say to each his own, live and let live, they are lesbians, get the **** over it.

I am the **** over it. Been the **** over it. Keep that limp-wrist in your pocket, Hogan. Could come in handy.

Im sure there are enough heterosexual sweaty fatass hair armpit white trailer trash wino bitches that want your ****, leave the bulldykes alone.

Yes... your mom wants to **** me.

 

[Phantom]

First of all, I'm not devastatingly handsome. I am more on the side of ravishingly handsome.

Second, all women want to sleep with me. They just don't know it yet.

And the trim loves me, but unfortunately there are some that will never find out.

Oh, BARF...

 

[RoyalOrleans]

Oh, BARF...

You know you want to ride on Space Mountain.

 

[Anna Perenna]

You're a hard man to argue with, but I will at least attempt to reply ...

First of all, I'm not devastatingly handsome. I am more on the side of ravishingly handsome. I mean, ****, you haven't even seen my curl-ups or bread-basket.

Second, all women want to sleep with me. They just don't know it yet.

No need to see your curl ups - I'll agree to all that on the proviso that you tell me what a bread basket actually is.

Sounds like women lick twat out of sheer spite of men, rather than from the experiences of hardship. I prefer the latter to the former, because at least there is some ****ing emotional basis.

A glimmer of a serious response.

I promise you that it is not out of spite. My sister tried to have boyfriends when we were in high school but she ended up breaking their hearts because she just didn't find them attractive.

I already think you're pretty cool, Anna. No need to get persnickety.

I wasn't getting persnickety. I was being facetious. Hard to convey over the net (without one of these )

Though I am sure you knew that. I'm simply quoting it because you said you thought I was pretty cool, and I have to admit I'm pretty chuffed about it.

 

[RoyalOrleans]

You're a hard man to argue with, but I will at least attempt to reply ...

Actually I'm not that hard to argue with, you've just got to look pass the cursing and the flaming self-gratification.

No need to see your curl ups - I'll agree to all that on the proviso that you tell me what a bread basket actually is.

A bread basket is a nickname for the lower torso; especially the stomach.

A glimmer of a serious response.

I promise you that it is not out of spite. My sister tried to have boyfriends when we were in high school but she ended up breaking their hearts because she just didn't find them attractive.

Perhaps you need to venture to the States and meet the American Dyke.

I wasn't getting persnickety. I was being facetious. Hard to convey over the net (without one of these )

Though I am sure you knew that. I'm simply quoting it because you said you thought I was pretty cool, and I have to admit I'm pretty chuffed about it.

Chuffed? As in delighted or disgruntled?

 

[Komrade Vostok Hazard]

Chuffed

What in the name of the good lord's arsehole is "chufed"

 

[Anna Perenna]

A bread basket is a nickname for the lower torso; especially the stomach.

Very nice. I was worried it was going to be something lower.

Perhaps you need to venture to the States and look at my bread basket.

Only if you insist .....

Chuffed? As in delighted or disgruntled?

Chuffed as in delighted. Very pleased. Smiling like a goober.

What in the name of the good lord's arsehole is "chufed"

Sorry, but I'm not sure what "chufed" means myself.

 

[RoyalOrleans]

Very nice. I was worried it was going to be something lower.

You shouldn't worry so much about that; it has many, many nicknames all of which give it away upon utterance.

Only if you insist .....

Seriously, if you ever come to the States and decide to make Savannah, GA your starting point; let me know. I'll give you the "nickel tour" and introduce you to some great food.

Chuffed as in delighted. Very pleased. Smiling like a goober.

There you go again with the phallic observations.

 

[Anna Perenna]

Seriously, if you ever come to the States and decide to make Savannah, GA your starting point; let me know. I'll give you the "nickel tour" and introduce you to some great food.

What's a nickel tour?

If by great food you mean cornbread and gumbo and soul food and all these other southern things I have heard about my whole life and always wanted to taste but never got the chance to, then I will definitely let you know.

I'm actually planning to go to New York City in October with my sister, for our birthday, but that's as far as we've planned. Hopefully we'll be able to visit Georgia and Florida as well. I'll keep you posted - especially if there is going to be great food involved.

There you go again with the phallic observations.

Unless you think a goober is something sexual (and I'd be very concerned if you did) then the phallic observations are pure projection on your part.....