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RoyalOrleans

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Everything posted by RoyalOrleans

  1. Can you believe that our Director of Homeland Security .. and the former Governor of Arizona ... didn't know this? What a fukken moonbat!
  2. No I don't know why you are happy to get rid of her? Sleep with her, eddo? Did you fall in love? Please don't tell me she faked a diarrhea story and bolted for the exit! Please don't.
  3. Obama can't simply stick for the people he took an oath to protect? He can't just say, "Yes, we have made some mistakes along the way, but you can't blame the United States for ALL the woes of your respective countries."?
  4. Ok... well... we're programmed to dislike France for a reason. It's France you know? Where is the full footage of Obama's response to Latin American leaders at this summit? Did Obama stick up for Americans?
  5. I belive Chavez would have offered me a copy of Eduardo Galeano's The Open Veins of Latin America; Five Centuries of the Pillage of a Continent.
  6. Listening is an important part of communication. However, at some time it MUST come to speaking in order to become communication. President Obama's problem is that he LISTENS to people blame America for all their problems, then he SPEAKS the same message. The Contras may have been funded by America, but they were Nicaraguans that disagreed with the Sandinistas. Mr. Chavez has insulted OUR President multiple times, and denigrates our country at any given opportunity. Our Presidents reaction is identical to the bullied that buddy up to the bullies. Our President "listens" and then AGREES. The Monroe Doctrine at Wikipedia
  7. What's the matter, wez? Sad that you weren't amongst the rabble to accuse, point fingers, and lampoon the United States?
  8. Then why attend the summit if not to appease a rabble of tyrants bent on pointing fingers at the U.S.? I realize that we have to because of our allies in the region, Chile, Brazil, Argentina, et.al., but should the assumed leader of the free world sit there, smile for the cameras, and take it from demagoguery?
  9. Latin America is a region that has largely been ignored by Washington for quite some time. Bill Clinton wasn't all that popular with our neighbors to the south. And while there was a glimmer of hope for George Bush, September 11th pretty much changed everything .. including a focus on rebuilding relations with Latin America. And when it comes to Barack Obama, they are hoping to capitalize on his star-power, play into his leftist sympathies, and emphasize his weakness on the world stage. This is the America they have been waiting for. The little summit they held in Trinidad and Tobago was an all around bitch-fest and Obama just sat there, all full of himself, and took it like a new inmate. First off, the President of Bolivia Evo Morales accused the US of a plot to assassinate him. Then you have socialist slugger Hugo the Horrible asserts that there is more democracy in Cuba than in the US (Which the US is not actually a democracy, but that's another argument.). Then Nicaraguan President Daniel Ortega blames the US of the plight of Latin America after this little diatribe Obama thanked Ortega for not blaming him personally for said atrocities. Motherfukkers. So what can we conclude from all of this? This was nothing more than a political photo-op for Latin American leaders, and a chance for them to roast America for their perceived history of neglect and abuse. I say photo-op because Barack Obama is extremely popular with the Latin American people. That's why these Latin American leaders made a point to deride America, but not Obama .. they know that having Obama on their side will only boost their own popularity. He is a pawn, folks. He is being used to boost personal popularity. Meanwhile, Obama's "listen and learn" approach gives them the luxury to hate on America in a way that makes them look stronger and America weaker.
  10. Ohhhh.... I completely vehemently, with a fukken passion, fukken concur. Janet Napolitano is Obama's worst cabinet appointment!
  11. ... to get the Latino vote.
  12. Happy Birthday, Brother. Don't you go dying on me.
  13. Well... there are different tellings of the Aristocrats joke. The Aristocrats (joke) on Wikipedia
  14. WARNING: THE FOLLOWING MATERIAL HAS BEEN RATED "HFS (HOLY FUKKEN SH!T) BY ROYALORLEANS! THIS IS EXTREMELY OFFENSIVE! SO DON'T SAY I DIDN'T WARN YOU!!! A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." So the scene opens to my adoring family in our Bavarian castle. We're dressed in fancy 17th century clothes. I'm playing Dies Irae on a massive antique harpsichord, drinking some fine 18 year Malt Scotch, while my wife does stitchwork in a large chair. My children are playing with the dog next to our ornate fireplace. After a couple of minutes dabbling with the musical piece, my wife comes over and slams the harpsichord lid, as hard as she can, onto my fingers. "Darling," I say, between the tears and screams, "what an interesting thing to do." I get up off my 17th Century harpsichord stool and slam the thing into the side of her face, dislodging some teeth. As she falls over somewhat dazed, I reach into the harpsichord and wrench out one of the strings, which I then use to strangle my wife with. At this point, the children are obviously distressed. They, and the dog, run over to try and stop me. Rounding on them, I kick my daughter right in her 12 year old vagina, and elbow drop my 8 year old son onto his fragile little chest. Did I mention he's a hemophiliac? Through all this, the dog is barking and snapping incessantly at me. It's one of those little handbag rats. I douse it in my Malt Scotch and drop kick the damn thing straight in to the fireplace, where it begins to combust. After all this commotion, my father and mother appear on the stage. Given that they're both over 80, and served in the SS during the war, they're both very good looking people, if a little flawed. My father looks around the place and becomes so turned on by the violence that he begins masturbating. My mother, she's such a darling, hurries over to her semi-conscious grandchildren. Father, still masturbating, strolls over to my wife who's beginning to come round. He notices the teeth she's missing and decides to her mouth, rather hard. My wife, in a large degree of pain already, goes into shock and bites down. My father socks her one in the head, but she won't go down. He's shaking her about like a wet fish, but she won't budge. It's priceless. Meanwhile, my mother has disrobed and commanded, in her harsh Germanic tones, both the children to do the same. I'm standing over them with a Hussar's sabre I've taken from over the fireplace, so they're more than willing to comply. My mother gets my son to start eating out her 85 year old pussy. It's drier than the Sahara, bless her. I insert the sabre into my daughter's already painful vagina, slowly at first. The dog, still on fire, finally manages to escape and blindly runs straight at my Aryan father, who's managed to pull his mangled penis out of my wife's semi-conscious jaw. Dad bleed extensively, I'm talking a fountain of the stuff, straight onto the dog and proceeds to stamp on the damn thing. In shock, it begins to expel all it's effluvia onto the stage: piss, vomit, and cum. Dad, still mad at my wife, picks her up by the hair. He rubs her face in it, only to find she's getting turned on. Because his penis is so damn mangled, he decides to start fisting her, taking advantage of the situation. But dad's got a thing about anal. And rather than fist, he punches his way in. I should know, we've done it before. So as my Dad's slamming his fist into my wife's ass, while she's rubbing dog filth into her , I've upped the ante with my daughter and sped up the sword. Obviously she's bleeding quite heavily at this point, just like my wife's ass in a couple of minutes. My son's in tears at what he's being forced to do and, in disgust, vomits straight into his grandmother's pussy. She smacks the boy in the eye socket and, in true Nazi style, marches off to get her jack boots. I've had enough of my daughter, so I thrust one final time with the sword, so hard the tip comes out the top of her head. As her body goes into its death spasms, I make my son her in the mouth. Her body also lets go, and she s out a kilo of the brown stuff. I tell my son to roll about in it, while his grandmother comes back on stage. In this time, my wife's ass has started hemorrhaging all over my dad. He's had more than enough and snaps her neck, not before giving her a few knocks to the head though. He's a gentleman like that. Mother comes back on stage in full SS regalia and has a branding iron in the shape of the Star of David. Red-hot I might add. As my father and I walk off stage, she inflicts the branding iron on my covered son, while singing songs about the master race. She's got a powerful voice on her that woman. My son, naturally, passes out. My mother, disgusted at his weakness, kicks his body all over the stage, then throws it on the fire. At this point, I love this part, my father and I rise up through the floor with this large, Frankensteinian machine. My mother and father gather my family's corpses (and the dog's) into the center of the room while I plug the thing into the electricity grid. Now this bit is a miracle of science. Part voodoo, part Nazi technology, it's one grand scene. My father goes to call for the servants while my mother slits her wrists with the sword, and draws a pentagram around the corpses, before toppling over dead on top of them. As I crank up the machine, Father returns with the servants who are carrying a cage. Inside the cage is the Pope, bound and gagged, but still in his regalia. We're not that cruel after all. I open the cage and my father helps the servants bring on a massive crucifix. After a bit of struggling on his holiness' behalf, we manage to nail him to the damn thing. To stop any more wriggling about, I use the hammer that pinned him on to break his knees and elbows. The machine starts to glow green and make loud noises, so I know it's ready. The servants hoist the Pope's crucifix, upside down, over my darling family. My father, ever loyal to the Reich, bless him, gives a rousing speech from the Nuremburg rally before stabbing himself right through the with the sword. It's too much for the old man, and he finally gives up his 89 years of living. With the tears still brimming in my eyes from witnessing such a proud act, I take two cables and clamp them onto the Pope's nipples. I squat down and out a massive load of clay-like brown stuff. I start drawing runes on his face, then stuff his mouth with the remainder. Returning to machine, I pull the switch and this beautiful, sickly green lightning goes straight through the crucifix and into the bodies. The pentagram on the floor starts to glow. It's something beautiful I tell you. As the Pope screams up there on his cross, my family's bodies start twitching. His holiness bursts into flames just as my wife starts to stand on her feet. The last thing he sees is my wonderful zombie family reaching up towards him. The zombies promptly turn on the servants, tearing into them with their undead fingers, ripping at organs and such. There's blood everywhere. It's at this point that Satan, dressed as Hitler, manifests in the pentagram and commends me on such a sterling job of inhumanity. My dad would be so proud. As a finale, Satan pulls out his 3 foot spiked penis and s me right in the ass, vigorously as you like, while my zombie family, sated on human flesh, start a conga of the dog being ed by my daughter, my son ing my daughter, my zombie wife doing my son, dad's her while eating my mother's zombie . Then Satan and I start singing "Time of my life", just before the curtains drop on this happy family scene. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"
  15. In 2006, as governor, Janet from another planet ordered additional National Guard troops down to the Arizona / Mexico border to stop the influx of illegal immigration. (Article: Governor OKs more troops for AZ border) Sending more troops, though a step in the right direction, was a band-aid on a dire and very real problem in the United States. She says that we are not at war with Mexico. To the contrary we are, in a sense, at war with Mexico. We're being invaded. Economically, that is, and the legal American worker is footing the bill. Janet makes great strides to comply with the current administration's socialist agenda. I bet you, dollars to fukken doughnuts, that if McCain were in the White House, she would lean towards securing the border with a more adamant solution.
  16. Obama drew comparisons, in this ARTICLE, between the Russian invasion of Georgia to the U.S. invasion of Iraq. Does anyone remember Georgia being a threat to Russia? Did Georgia have a weapons program? Was Georgia in violation of multiple UN Resolutions ... violations that authorized any UN member to go in and remove their leader? I'm just curious if I'll have to break out my science.
  17. Obama can get a lot of mileage with the $100 million mark because to most Americans, it sounds like a lot when compared to 3.6 trillion. They have no idea of the relativity between a Million and a Trillion. But they do understand that 100 is bigger than 3.6. I think that all news should print the numbers all the way out: Obama has charged his cabinet with reducing $100,000,000 from his $3,600,000,000,000 budget.
  18. Old Blackwater keep on rollin'!
  19. Yes. To keep in your shirt pocket.
  20. Come on, folks! Let's get real here. Obama says that he is going to go line by line and streamline the budget .. and all he can come up with is $100 million? Folks, we are talking about a man who has proposed a budget worth $3.6 trillion. We are talking about a government that currently holds a $1.2 trillion deficit. And he asks his entire cabinet to trim $100 million?
  21. And we'll call you Barney Fife.
  22. This is one you're going to have to get used to. For the next four years - possibly the next eight years - every single time someone disagrees with a word that Obama says, or every time someone doesn't jump when Obama says "frog;" every slight of Obama, no matter how obscure, will be called racism. Obama, you understand, is perfection. There is only one reason in the world that anyone would ever disagree with one word from this man. Only one reason why anyone would ever deny him anything; and that would simply be because Obama is black. This is going to get sooooooooo tiring.
  23. Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr..........s Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..........s A'flurry!
  24. Ooooooooooo....................... (atlasshruggedface)
  25. One day a construction worker left the job a little early, and when he got home he found his wife in bed with another man. Purple with rage, he hauled the man down the stairs and into the garage where he proceeded to secure his dick in a vice. Utterly terrified, the man screamed, "Stop, stop! you're not going to cut it off, are you? ARE YOU?" "Nope," replied the construction worker, "You are...I'm going to set the garage on fire."
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