Can they quit on their own?
- Thread starter Anonymous
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atlantic
New member
You know Phantom, I've been thinking alot lately about all the times in the past when she has actually met me and my son at the park and then left for an hour or more to supposedly talk to someone about a job. Now I think that was just bullshit too. It all adds up now. Nazznegg is right also, she is just worried about him doing her drugs; and the fact that they get welfare and are taking it away from a child who may actually need it makes me sick. She constantly complained about her husbands addictions (which are many); shows up at his work to check on him, calls him up to 20 times a day; she even was told she couldn't show up at his work for awhile, but it is behind their house so pretty hard to enforce. She really ****** me off dragging me and my son into that. After 20 years of always picking up her pieces I'm done. She only cares about herself.
Jhony5
New member
A few questions NazzNegg number two.
You need to be more careful and descriptive when laying out such a broad statement such as this. I plan on resuming my recreational use of marijuana when my custody situation is finalized. However and of course this does not suggest that I'll be toking up in the bathroom while my daughter plays in the other room. People that do that are pieces of **** on the sidewalk of life. I'll say the same for people that drink while they have their kids under their care. However this is generally socially acceptable as it is not illegal. Somehow that makes it right.
The words "addict" ..."addicted"...and "addiction" have transformed into buzzwords. With many different applications and levels of severity.
The definition of the word ADDICTION: compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal.
I drink coffee everyday. But does that mean I have a coffee addiction? According to this definition, yes. Because, although on a very minor scale, I will have physiological symptoms as a result of depriving my body of a substance that it craves. Cigarettes, well those physiological symptoms are somewhat more harsh and carry a far more apparent effect upon withdrawal. Some people have addictions to certain TV shows. They find themselves stuck in traffic and realize that they are going to miss their show, thus making them physically agitated and, as silly as it might sound, emotionally upset to one degree or another.
So I have to ask you to clarify what you mean, EXACTLY, by your statement that addicts are bad parents. Most of us here are addicts in one sense or another.
What you said might seem obvious as most of use are probably picturing a crackhead huddling over his pile of dope while his/her children are scuttling about trying to figure out how to cook their own mac 'n' cheese. If thats what you mean by "addicts" then I'm totally with ya.
Often the "experts" that study drugs and hand out advice and legislative measures about drugs are doing so while in a vacuum. This is a large part of the reason why many narcotics, and the ensuing addictions are misunderstood and **** gets lost in translation. Because there is a need for translation when dealing with and discussing something that one has no personal knowledge about.
You can read all the books and scientific data you want about cocaine. But in the end you'll know very little about the nature of the beast until you've stood face to face with it.
To understand this you must also understand that often police will turn to former criminals when trying to understand and profile other criminals and their respective crimes. How does a serial killer think? Ask a serial killer, then you'll know. All else is equal to guesswork.
In short your above post more of a smart **** jab than a thoughtful addition to this thread.
What exactly do you mean by "use...drugs" in this reference? Are we talking about just hard drugs like cocaine, meth and heroin? Or are we talkin about illegal drugs in general? Is alcohol included in this? Maybe just people who use drugs while they have their children in their care?
You need to be more careful and descriptive when laying out such a broad statement such as this. I plan on resuming my recreational use of marijuana when my custody situation is finalized. However and of course this does not suggest that I'll be toking up in the bathroom while my daughter plays in the other room. People that do that are pieces of **** on the sidewalk of life. I'll say the same for people that drink while they have their kids under their care. However this is generally socially acceptable as it is not illegal. Somehow that makes it right.
Again you make a broad sweeping statement that has lots and lots of room for individual deciphering.
The words "addict" ..."addicted"...and "addiction" have transformed into buzzwords. With many different applications and levels of severity.
The definition of the word ADDICTION: compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined physiological symptoms upon withdrawal.
I drink coffee everyday. But does that mean I have a coffee addiction? According to this definition, yes. Because, although on a very minor scale, I will have physiological symptoms as a result of depriving my body of a substance that it craves. Cigarettes, well those physiological symptoms are somewhat more harsh and carry a far more apparent effect upon withdrawal. Some people have addictions to certain TV shows. They find themselves stuck in traffic and realize that they are going to miss their show, thus making them physically agitated and, as silly as it might sound, emotionally upset to one degree or another.
So I have to ask you to clarify what you mean, EXACTLY, by your statement that addicts are bad parents. Most of us here are addicts in one sense or another.
What you said might seem obvious as most of use are probably picturing a crackhead huddling over his pile of dope while his/her children are scuttling about trying to figure out how to cook their own mac 'n' cheese. If thats what you mean by "addicts" then I'm totally with ya.
Agreed.
Sounds correct, but plenty of room for correction. People that work on cars are the last people that should be handing out advice about cars. Did that sound right? Naaaaa, it sounds a little funny. Think about that for a second will ya please.
Often the "experts" that study drugs and hand out advice and legislative measures about drugs are doing so while in a vacuum. This is a large part of the reason why many narcotics, and the ensuing addictions are misunderstood and **** gets lost in translation. Because there is a need for translation when dealing with and discussing something that one has no personal knowledge about.
You can read all the books and scientific data you want about cocaine. But in the end you'll know very little about the nature of the beast until you've stood face to face with it.
To understand this you must also understand that often police will turn to former criminals when trying to understand and profile other criminals and their respective crimes. How does a serial killer think? Ask a serial killer, then you'll know. All else is equal to guesswork.
In short your above post more of a smart **** jab than a thoughtful addition to this thread.
atlantic
New member
I don't feel that people should lose their children, I do feel that if somebody is neglecting their child because of drug use they should be made to get counseling and monitored.
I feel bad for people with addictions, what kind of life is it, when all you can really connect with is a pipe, or a drink. Sad really.
I think people can get help but only if the people they know don't enable them, and they themselves truly want the help.
Phantom
New member
I absolutely disagree with that. A parent should never drink when they are alone with their children, smoke ciggarettes around their children, or do drugs at all if they have children. I couldn't care less if anyone disagrees with me. I can't stand parents who do such things. Kids are too precious. Period.
Weed, beer, ciggarettes: although considered "light" addictions by many, are still not something a responsible or good parent should do or do around their kids.
If someone has a drinking or drug problem, they should lose their rights to their children, even if temporarily while they get help. Why should children be subjected to their parents' idiocy? Unacceptable. The parents already showed society their drugs were more important to them than their children in my opinion.
atlantic
New member
Phantom, I do agree that these things should not be done around children at all. Lets say for example though you have a chance to go out with the girls one night, have a designated driver and know your son will be safe at home with dad. Then I think it would be ok for you to drink. I should have clarified that.
I don't let anyone smoke cigs around my son, hence, why I was so ****** my son had to be stuck in that house breathing the crack air.
Addictions are usually destructive period. Whether it be gambling, drinking alcohol, drugs. When someone brings a child into this world they need to put their selfish wants behind and do right by the child aways I agree.
atlantic
New member
Phantom, this brings up another good debate. I knew a nurse 20 years ago that was an acquaintance of a guy I was dating who used Cocaine occasionally with her husband at parties. I was shocked to learn this, but everyone else seemed fine with it. She was a great mother and a good nurse. You'd be surprise how many people in various professions can carry themselves well in society and still party once in awhile. I honestly wouldn't have felt right about reporting her. She was a wonderful person and mom. I should also mention that I knew her children were always safe, and well provided for and were never neglected of medical attention when they needed it or food and shelter.
snafu
New member
Back to the topic.
You can quit on your own. But if they get caught and say they're gonna quit I wouldn't believe them. Also if they quit you will notice because they will go through withdrawals and then they will be proud to mention the fact they quit. They will be able to tell you how long they've been clean. It's a badge of honor. To quit on your own you have to have will power too. Without self control and will power they are domed to the drug without intervention.
You can quit on your own. But if they get caught and say they're gonna quit I wouldn't believe them. Also if they quit you will notice because they will go through withdrawals and then they will be proud to mention the fact they quit. They will be able to tell you how long they've been clean. It's a badge of honor. To quit on your own you have to have will power too. Without self control and will power they are domed to the drug without intervention.
Phantom
New member
I know a lot of older people that smoke weed on a regular basis but they don't have young children. I guess it comes down to doing something that alters your reaction time and senses. To me, it just seems like a bad idea.
How good of a parent could anyone be if they do drugs around their kids? I'm glad the children were "always safe" but that sounds like luck. It's just not worth the risk of possibility.
If you can handle a beer or two then I suppose it's ok but if you are a lightweight like me who gets a buzz after half a beer, it's best to stay away.
atlantic
New member
That's the thing; she would never do that around her children, and I guess I just didn't know enough about the situation to really feel like I could make a judgement about her. From what I was told they only used it once in a blue moon. I felt the same way you did though. I felt it was wrong.
The other person has a history, and by history I'm talking about 15 years of serious drug addiction. So bad that she has stolen all her friends vehicles to go in search of her love (Drugs) while she was staying with them. She has stolen from all her friends and family, she will stop at nothing once she gets going.
phreakwars
New member
Anybody heard this story yet ??
http://www.woai.com/news/local/story.aspx?content_id=911f03df-e75c-4887-9b7b-51860c3592f9
They are charged with INJURY TO A CHILD !!!
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http://www.woai.com/news/local/story.aspx?content_id=911f03df-e75c-4887-9b7b-51860c3592f9
They are charged with INJURY TO A CHILD !!!
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Jhony5
New member
Holy ****....thats horrible. They should be charged with something serious indeed. I had a friend who's dad did this to him when he was 7. Both of which are in and out of jail frequently.
That is injury, BTW Phreak. A 2 year old doesn't even have a developed body yet and hes smoking tar laden marijuana. His brain is still developing the necessary electrical connections and no ******* doubt whatsoever that this is damaging to this process. A clear case of child abuse and they should be in prison for that stunt.
KathyA
New member
I am going to let you slide on this comment. Only because you wrote that the 'majority' of cases are brought on by lifestyle. As long as you are aware that its not the case 100% of the time.. There are 2 types of diabetes, one is child onset, type 1.. The other is adult onset, type 2. And while lifestyle is definately a contributing fact in type 2. It has nothing to do with type 1. What possibly could a 5 year old do to their body that would cause this renal deficiency ?
Blah, blah, blah. What the **** is this all about?
While I think that ADD is overly diagnosed. It does exist. The problem lies with understanding it. And learning how to deal with it. NOT to medicate the problem. If you put your kid on any ADD medication because you can't handle them, then your an idiot. You as a parent. Again, NOT in all cases. But at least 90% of these children do not belong on medication.
Now back to main subject. No, I don't believe someone can quit on their own. Usually the person with the addictive personality finds something else to manifest their addiction towards. Have you ever gone to an AA/NA meeting? Ever notice the amount of people outside smoking? Ever notice the amount of people that 'have' to have a coffee in their hands? When you put one addiction aside like drugs and alcohol, another addiction replaces the behavior. So even though you quit the main the substance, what ever that may be, something steps in and takes it place. And the addictive cycle continues.