Funny Quotes

<whoreee> i just ordered the explosion self titled CD single?
<Weeve> what's it called?

hhahahha.. i've done that once or twice before! the people just look at me and stare... but that was like.. way back when... -cough-
 
okay here another one...
At class my foot was ichy wich was really annoying and it got worse
*there is a sort of cancer called Leukemie in dutch and my whole life I tought it was jeukemie* jeuk is dutch for itchy. So I sad I've jeukemie. Hybi: whaha wokay and then Mnoe: uhm when you have jeukemie are you itchy all the time??
Hybi: euh it's leukemie
Mnoe: oh ey yeah..is it??
 
KillMeImIrish said:
<whoreee> i just ordered the explosion self titled CD single?
<Weeve> what's it called?

hhahahha.. i've done that once or twice before! the people just look at me and stare... but that was like.. way back when... -cough-
Haha, that one actually made me laugh out loud. Sounds like something I would say.. lol.
 
Well, my friends found out about my massive 'crush' thing on some girl at my school when I was wasted.. they were using her to make me do stuff, like lure me into places, for example. Yea...

Matt - Sigh. says:
i heard about how u lured me into the car too...
Matt - Sigh. says:
****er..
says:
lol
says:
well it was that or taxi
says:
that u pay for
Matt - Sigh. says:
lol
Matt - Sigh. says:
janessa tried to get me to go to sleep at justins the same way
Matt - Sigh. says:
i should slap her. :p
says:
lol
says:
thats how i got u on the couch at his house
Matt - Sigh. says:
god dammit
says:
and into his house
Matt - Sigh. says:
****ing hell!!


Not incredibly funny. But again, it's all I've got. :( Worst thing is that I don't remember a thing from that night.
 
I was talking to Ryan on msn and I decided to quote this:

Brkng_th_Hbt dice:
oh! Vero is short for veronica!! am i right? lol
WoOoHoOoO Ya sOn mEnOs lOs dIaS Q FaLtAn pArA El cOnCiErTo dE AvRiL!!! dice:
yup
Brkng_th_Hbt dice:
wow i'm slow lmao!
WoOoHoOoO Ya sOn mEnOs lOs dIaS Q FaLtAn pArA El cOnCiErTo dE AvRiL!!! dice:
that´s my full name
WoOoHoOoO Ya sOn mEnOs lOs dIaS Q FaLtAn pArA El cOnCiErTo dE AvRiL!!! dice:
hahahaahaha
Brkng_th_Hbt dice:
I've know you're name was Vero for a few months now, but i didn't know it was veronica! XD lol lmao rofl
WoOoHoOoO Ya sOn mEnOs lOs dIaS Q FaLtAn pArA El cOnCiErTo dE AvRiL!!! dice:
hahahaha rofl!!!!
 
some by my friends and stuff.

roger: melissa im tired.
me: of what
roger: tired of being cool.

and i like dane cook so yea hold on.

Dane Cook: THe Kool Aid MAn BIT
Dane Cook: Ok well like when i was young i will always have these like ****ed up dreams you know why?
audience: ....
DC: The ****ing kool aid man
audience: laughter
DC: Like he would crash through the wall like you wouldn't even no he was like *makes crashing noise* OH YEA! OH YEA! then like the kids would drink out of him. And he'd be like OH YEA!! and they would drinkin out of him after like debris like fell in him and He'll be like OH YEA!!! I mean if that was me. I would be like ok dude you think ur cool, well using the front door is cool now you patch that up before my dad gets home and kicks my ass. and he'd be like OH YEA!! and I would be like Oh no you, you fruity beverage. OH YEA!! OH YEA!!! OH NO!!!! YOU GET out you fruity drink. OH YEA!! NO!!!!

its not exactly what he said but you get the point.
 
misspiggy said:
some by my friends and stuff.

roger: melissa im tired.
me: of what
roger: tired of being cool.

and i like dane cook so yea hold on.

Dane Cook: THe Kool Aid MAn BIT
Dane Cook: Ok well like when i was young i will always have these like ****ed up dreams you know why?
audience: ....
DC: The ****ing kool aid man
audience: laughter
DC: Like he would crash through the wall like you wouldn't even no he was like *makes crashing noise* OH YEA! OH YEA! then like the kids would drink out of him. And he'd be like OH YEA!! and they would drinkin out of him after like debris like fell in him and He'll be like OH YEA!!! I mean if that was me. I would be like ok dude you think ur cool, well using the front door is cool now you patch that up before my dad gets home and kicks my ass. and he'd be like OH YEA!! and I would be like Oh no you, you fruity beverage. OH YEA!! OH YEA!!! OH NO!!!! YOU GET out you fruity drink. OH YEA!! NO!!!!

its not exactly what he said but you get the point.
LMFAO...nothing can top the Kool-Aid man :D
 
yea i have alot of funnie stories and stuff. me and my friends are totally stupid and we say stupid things. i just can't remember half of it. :eek:
 
This was on my way to a FooFighters concert yesterday...

Me:I can't wait,i'm gonna be sooo close to David Grohl!
My Aunt:You don't even know who he is.
Me: -_-Yes i do...
My Aunt:Fine,what band was he in before FooFighters?
Me:Nirvana!
My Aunt: Um,ok fine who was the lead singer in Nirvana?
Me:Kurt Cobain!!!
My Aunt: Um, Kurt Cobain was married to?
Me:Courtney love!!1
My Aunt: Did they have a kid???
Me:Yes!!1
My Aunt:And the Gender of the child???
Me: Female!!!!!!1
My Aunt:Is he still alive???
Me:No :(

**1 minute later**
Me:Well,is that all you got for me? >_<
My Aunt: -_-...Shut up.
Me:....-_-....I THOUGHT SO! ^_^

I love telling her off...and yes we act like sisters,lol
 
lol, i even knew those answers.. common knowledge to the music fiend XD

anyways, this was from work a couple days ago

what you ahve to understand is there's this thing called u-scan, where you scan.. your items lol (i work at a grocery store) okay, so this is what happened

a customer was having trouble scanning something, so here we go

<Linda> Ma'am what's that you're scanning?
<Mike> Gillette, the best a man can get.
<Me> DUDE! I didn't know your mom changed her name to Gillette.

yeah yeah, kinda lame, funny as hell if youw ere there
Linda and Mike are both coworkers btw.
 
okay something i said awhile ago.

me: dude kimberly guess what i saw on my shower curtain?
kim: what?
me: a ****ing spant!
kim: *looks up from art project* a spant?
me: yea its like a ant with the body of an ant and like the legs of a spider! a spant!!
kim: right?
me: yea what would you want it to be called an anter or a spanter or um...a spander? gosh!!!!! ur sooooooooooo uptight
mr. gall (my art teacher): ok melissa its time to calm down
me: but i saw a SPANT last night!!!!!!
mr.gall: okay enough with the spant talk....let it go melissa..let it go.

probably not that funnie but it was like a kodak moment.
 
watching DNAngel:
Hiwatari-"Daisuke.. thinking about him makes me..."
Caitlin-"HORNY!"

lmao..

my band's quotes:

"MATT STOP WEARING MY CLOTHES!"-me
"AW! But they're so comfortable!"-Matt


"Helena is a camel!" Jayde

"Tom delonge(blink 182) is a sex godess"-me

"Herpes! Fully loaded!"-Kandy (while watching the new Herbie movie)

lol
 
misspiggy said:
okay something i said awhile ago.

me: dude kimberly guess what i saw on my shower curtain?
kim: what?
me: a ****ing spant!
kim: *looks up from art project* a spant?
me: yea its like a ant with the body of an ant and like the legs of a spider! a spant!!
kim: right?
me: yea what would you want it to be called an anter or a spanter or um...a spander? gosh!!!!! ur sooooooooooo uptight
mr. gall (my art teacher): ok melissa its time to calm down
me: but i saw a SPANT last night!!!!!!
mr.gall: okay enough with the spant talk....let it go melissa..let it go.

probably not that funnie but it was like a kodak moment.
I admire how much time it must've took you to get all those colors there lol.. but the quote was HELLA funny!! LMAO..10/10..creative ;)
 
Thelea (BrokenAngel) kept bugging me about drew.. lmao..

Thelea: are you guys personal friends...or LPF friends?
me:o_O LPF.. I've never been to perth so.. I haven't met him in person..
Thelea:yet*
me:lmao
me:I might ^___^
Thelea:you sooo have a crush on him!
me: O_O HE'S 6 YEARS OLDER THAN ME
Thelea:so what?!
Thelea:how old are you?
me:13
Thelea: oh alright...i think that's kinda against the law, right?
me:yes.
Thelea:aw crap
Thelea:still doesn't mean that you can't have a crush on him
me:lmao
me:*smacks your head* lol
Thelea:*smacks it back* don't do that!
me:heheheh ^.^
Thelea:do you have a bf?
me:Nope ^.^
Thelea:could you stop doing that and just add "yet" behind it?? lol
me:lmao! *falls over*
Thelea:*picks you up and places you a table*
me:O_O
Thelea:aha!
me:I think I'm having another laugh attack
Thelea:where'd it come from? o_O
me:I dunno o_O
Thelea:weirdo
Thelea:lmao
me:lmao
me:brb
Thelea:aight
me:b
me:I fell over laughing when I was feeding the cats... lmao
Thelea:wth??
me:lmao
me: Dad asked me what I was laughing about
Thelea:what time is it there anyway?
Thelea:what's ya say?
me:7:10 PM
me:I told him what you said
me:about me
me:and drew
me:lmao
Thelea:you like it, don't you??!
me:lmao
Thelea:yes you do!
me:O_O
Thelea:i KNEW it!!
Thelea:what'd i win?
me:o_O *passes you a pancake*
me:^.^
Thelea:good enough

lmao
 
<me> Hey steph, I have a scenario for you.
<steph> Shoot
<me> okay, so, lets say you have a donkey, and I have a rooster.
<steph> Okay..
<me> well, your donkey gets hungry. So it eats my roosters two feet. What do you have have now?
<steph> I don't know, what?
<me> Two feet of my **** in your ass
<steph> rofl you dirty boy
<me> You know you like it.
<steph> I know <3 *Hug*


yeah yeah, lame, dirty, but damn I love huggin her.
 

Similar threads

O
2
Replies
28
Views
162
whoisthatmaskedman@hotmail.com
W
O
Replies
30
Views
199
Onideus Mad Hatter
O
O
Replies
0
Views
77
Onideus Mad Hatter
O
O
Replies
1
Views
60
whoisthatmaskedman@hotmail.com
W
Back
Top