{Wood'z Journal Act 2}

Ravynlee

New member
This is what I just replied to him to another email -Quote:To be all honest I think you're the cause of the relationship fallout. I asked you to help me with my problems and you did nothing for it. My actions, as there is no real excuse for them, ultimately could have been prevented if you just understood my condition and help me.

Come over tonight unescorted by anyone I promise I will not get violent unless I am provoked and trust me you know what I am like when I'm provokedand get your ****, including your underwear and jumper and your phone. I think you've seen my full potential. If you want to stay for drinks or anything I will be fine with that. Call it our farewell drink or anything. I think I deserve all my food/what money you owe me from the bet/clothes back as well.
Please tell me you were joking... :eek: Jesus H Christ... I have no comment whatsoever.
 

woodyloveslinkin

New member
I did not strike him in the waist with my leg, I slapped him across the face. I have not threatened him with more letters at all. I HATE HIM. He's making all these weird accusations!! And I didn't break into his home. *******.
 

Ravynlee

New member
Would be lying if I said I was shocked. Just one more chapter to this saga isn't it? Bet you wish you hadn't been so nice to him now with that email, huh?
 

Ravynlee

New member
I did not strike him in the waist with my leg, I slapped him across the face. I have not threatened him with more letters at all. I HATE HIM. He's making all these weird accusations!! And I didn't break into his home. *******.
Actually the email you sent where you said he knows what you're capable of even to me was borderline. Like it or not, you walked right into that one. No comment at all would have been better than trying to be civil. A clear cut, giving him his **** back and getting the cops involved for yours was the way to go. Now he has made the first step in ******** you over. You know he's made himself out to look like the victim. Doesn't matter what you counter-claim now, he will always have the cops' sympathies because he got in first.

Silly girl Sarah.

At this point though don't stress. For now it is literally his word against yours. If he has his roommate or whatever testify against you as a character witness then it will become more 2 against 1 and look worse for you. Besides, you haven't been formally charged. They're intimidation tactics and they are working extremely well. He wants to get you stressed and scared, and let's face it, he's not an idiot, anyone who's been intimate with another knows their weakest spots and that's exactly what he's doing.

Want my advice? First thing you do is formally address any so-called problems with you. If he says you're mentally unstable, make an appointment and see someone. Talk it through, get therapy. Sounds dumb but trust me will be like a shield for you in court should it come to that. The fact you saw problems and took steps to 'fix' them will make you look better than you do in the eyes of the law now. Start that tomorrow. Don't wait. If you do, you'll look guilty. He will win. Stop procrastinating and take control, take your life back, stop letting him run it. You have a spine, you have a brain, use both.

 

Ravynlee

New member
I'm ****** off. I'm tempted to go to his place now and slap some truth into that guy. *******.
SHUT UP! Keep talking like this he will get you thrown in jail! THIS is what he means by threats! **** woman are you that dense you just don't get it? He's playing you like a freakin instrument and my *** are you responding. Wake up, Sarah, or you won't have to worry about him ******** you over in court, you'll do it to yourself! >:eek:

 

Ravynlee

New member
I'm going to ask him nicely to drop everything. I'm not wasting my time and effort in court.
He won't. You know why? For the same reason you took his phone; to hurt him. He wants to hurt you too. Besides, you 'talk him out of it' and he's likely to use this against you later, reminding you how nice he was to you by not taking you to court as emotional blackmail. Don't be an idiot. Again. Stand back and say / do nothing at all to him. Let him dig his own hole. But why am I even telling you any of this? I feel like I'm beating my head against a brick wall when I have told you for ages now and you refuse to listen. Am not looking to say I told you so, but christ, I wonder why I bother replying at all most times. You'll figure it all out. You do eventually. Maybe.
And as for not wasting your time and effort. You don't show being stubborn not only will you look bad you'll more than likely lose your stuff, get fined, maybe charged, and get a conviction against your name (if it were to proceed to actual criminal charges and they were proven) - not the smartest thing - or MOST MATURE way to approach this problem. Use your head. For the love of ***, wake up!

 

woodyloveslinkin

New member
Well, guess what I did? I asked him to drop it to his face without an angry word said or done, and he's going to do it. We sat there talking about various things.

He heard one of my friends say (he doesn't know her name) that I've been doing badly at uni and I have. I told him that it was one of the reasons why I'm taking leave and he said it was for the better. He said which really SHOCKED ME was the reason why he hasn't charged me with anything was because he felt half responsible for my actions. He said that he was afraid that he was going to be the one lashing out at me not the other way around and that he feared that I was going to be the one taking the AVO out on him not the other way around. What he said was true, it was him or me that was going to crack first and it was better me than him he said, because he felt like he was going to grab the nearest knife and stab me with it. His direct words.

He said that I could keep his phone but just give back the sim and then he knew I had his phone on me (I've been ignoring my mother's repetitive phone calls for the night) and asked why he couldn't have it back. I said that I felt like he didn't deserve his phone back. He offered to give my stuff back but at that stage I was balling my eyes out. I asked him if he ever loved me, he said yes, he loved the old me but was too afraid to admit to his own feelings about me :'( He went to the coucillor today and funny thing that the guy said, you can love but hate each other so much at the same time. He said he couldn't hug me and I said that I didn't even want a hug. I just told him to drop it the AVO because of some reasons, and he said yes he would.

The only reason why that was brought out on me was because he thought I would never calm down. I was so calm with him tonight I didn't use violence and I didn't swear at him. I didn't raise my voice and I didn't threaten him. We apologised to each other that things had to get to the point of an AVO.

Is it just me or is he making sense for once?

 

woodyloveslinkin

New member
Okay outta sucker mode.

But I swear to *** if someone calls my name to wake me up next I will strangle them. Amanda, the people from downstair's secretery, kept yelling my name, so I dragged myself outta bed and went downstairs. I asked her what was happening and she was like

"Just checking you were here, bye."

"How come you're leaving so quickly?"

*holds up envelope "Just had to get something for Ian that's all."

She woke me up for that?

Not looking forward to today at all. It means going out and having coffee with a mister someone to continue on from last night's talk. It's not like we're getting back together, oh *** no! But it's just....I wanna make sure that AVO is gone. ****. Reminds me, therapy tomorrow. He said the reason why he's dropping it is because "he was ahead of himself and knew I was unstable and the only person to blame was himself for letting it get to this point". About ******* time he's admitted to somethings. Or is he being sneaky and giving me back what I want (I hope to *** he hasn't got it in his mind that I'll ever get back togethe with him I mean it, I'm dead set not getting back together with that ***) and then pounce on me? Why do I feel like this isn't going to get anywhere but at the same time I feel like I'm just setting myself up for something I don't want?

Marilyn Manson's Coma White is slowly sending me back to sleep....

 

woodyloveslinkin

New member
:yea:

Monthly pregnant test results (I do this for my own ***) My blood tests came back from the doctors just then and the funny thing is I'm not pregnant...but seriously wtf? One minute they tell me from my other tests that I am and the other tests says I'm not. But they also said to me that certain medication like the one I am one, can block out whatever hormone that makes you think you are which can only be found through the first test I took. But still leaving me thinking wtf? Its too technical for me and all I wanna know is I'm not pregnant so no kid for me and no bullshit for me!! YAY! Time to go back drinking/smoking.

 

Ravynlee

New member
:yea: Monthly pregnant test results (I do this for my own ***) My blood tests came back from the doctors just then and the funny thing is I'm not pregnant...but seriously wtf? One minute they tell me from my other tests that I am and the other tests says I'm not. But they also said to me that certain medication like the one I am one, can block out whatever hormone that makes you think you are which can only be found through the first test I took. But still leaving me thinking wtf? Its too technical for me and all I wanna know is I'm not pregnant so no kid for me and no bullshit for me!! YAY! Time to go back drinking/smoking.
When I was 16 the same thing happened to me. Back then it was called a 'phantom pregnancy,' meaning my body had all the symptoms of pregnancy but there was no child obviously. Their explanation back then (considering only a year or so beforehand I was also suspected of having endometriosis / sterility) was that it was a side effect of medication, namely of all things, the Pill. Go figure. It's always a good thing to seek a second opinion, especially if you doubt the results. It's your body, no one knows it better than you do ;)

As for the rest. Nothing to say.

 

woodyloveslinkin

New member
Yeah. I'm still wtfing at the doctors.

Well today I kudos myself for not getting physically angry with him. It was in the middle of the shopping centre. I don't know wtf came over me, I just wanted to lose control over what was being said. I know it wasn't anything major being said, but I just found myself getting angry all of a sudden. I talked to someone on the phone about what's been happening and they told me to take this test at the doctor's to determine if I have severe bipolar/schizphrenia. I was like schizaphrenia? wtf? I ain't seeing **** all. And they said if I have been eating a lot lately, and I'm like "more than ever! I have a gut on me!" And they were like it is a sign.

As much to my own disgust what was said today, I am partly to blame for getting angry, but I stood my ground I did not lose self control at all. I'm really happy that I didn't. He said that he's retracting the AVO and therefore, for me to prove to him (I can't believe it myself I found myself sucking up to the guy, by all means, I'm trying to get the guy off my back about the AVO) that I will not harm him/myself.

We're drawing up an agreement with the help of a therapist of course :) Something like this -

I, Sarah W&(^%*&(&^, will not attack Daniel in any verbal or physical way. If I do so Daniel needs to take these steps to help Sarah retain her calmness -

a) If I get violent or aggressive in both verbal/physical manner, I lose privilages

b) If I don't get violent or agressive in both verbal/ physical manner, I earn privilages

c) I give permission to Daniel if I get violent for to Daniel physically restrain me if I am is "provoked" to attack him physically but doing so he is not allowed to get the police involved

d) Losing privilages will eventually result in the AVO going though

e) Gaining privilages will eventually result in the AVO not going through

f) I am not allowed to damage or steal any of Daniel's property

g) If I do, I lose privilages

h) I will not harm myself with any objects

i) I will not start nasty rumours about Daniel

I feel like a little kid, but I have to do it. I am the one to blame after all because I was the one who physically attacked him with a screw driver after all in the first place.

I think his goes along the lines of

I Daniel Humphris will not attack Sarah in any verbal or physical way. I need to take these steps to make sure she is okay mentally and physically (because she's been asking for it from day one!!)

a) When Sarah is angry I must talk her out of it calmly

b) I do not deliberately provoke Sarah

c) I will not get the police involved because it sends her pyscho when the police arrive

d) I do not wish to get back together with her (I tried to put this one in but he wouldn't allow it, **** therapist!!)

e) I will not steal or damage Sarah's property

f) I will cooperate with her in the best manner possible

g) I do not wish for Sarah to end up in jail because of me

h) I will not forgive myself if she ends up hurting herself because of me

There's some alteration needed badly in those, BUT I am getting help (admit it, I'm outta whack right now) and I am seeking advice. I didn't swear nor did I cause I scene today. I hate to say it, but in his right mood and mind, he is a good guy. We're both ****** up and this has been demonstrated throughout time.

My **** sister keeps trying to contact me. I think my whole **** family's concerned for me right now. It's nice, but I haven't even told Imogen of the latest development and that's saying something. I rather discuss it in words than verbally as I know I'll lose self control and do something stupid that I might end up regretting.

ACTUALLY - since I've been spending more time on LPA then LPF right now, sorry, but LPA I've made a ton of friends and you get post count for everything in the random section (but not as a good'er friend than you Rav :) Admit it, you just lurrrrvvvveeee me!) and there's a lot more activity going on there, Arlene did give me a good tip about Daniel in the "Got Something to Let Something Out Part 2" thread -

DS: I think you should hear him out. Yeah, he proved himself a jerk, but if he's willing to support you, you might want him on your side.
http://lpassociation.com/forums/showthread.php?p=825940#post825940Yeah my user name is December's Shadow...lol, I'm such a nong bat.

But the gay thing about LPA is that if you're a noob the first 50 posts have to be approved by moderators. Penny and I are like the equals to you and Jojo, Rav! We're both Australian and Greek!

 

woodyloveslinkin

New member
:D I got lots of replies back from that one single photo on LPA. Man it's like a hurricane at 10 pm. Penny from Greece and Sylar and I just spam nonsense **** everywhere in random thoughts. I think tonight's topic was that Sylar needed to wear make up, despite him being a guy and I needed to wear less :D

Despite me only having 300 posts or so there I've been a member since May and I talk to Mike a lot on AIM, I've seemed to fit in quite well. Derek (a.k.a The Modfather) and I were having a long conversation with the topic being of the American Optical Scheme. I'm not at the point just yet where I can easily ditch LPF. LPF's had some pretty good times at it, yeah, it's dull at the moment, too dull, but I'm rather thinking about spending less time on here then usual. Post my stories that's about it and post in here + LPA let's you have huge *** sigs :) LPA moves so ******* fast it's only at certain times that it slows down to be fast. Which I guess that's what I miss about old LPF really. I know I shouldn't ***** and moan about LPF but I am following rules and I'm not mentioning any names.

A Great Video, Imagine by A Perfect Circle <3

I'm just bored shitless right now so I'm going to quote some responses to my pic which I said was evil -

@ DS: You look nice in the picture' date=' honey [img']http://www.lpassociation.com/forums/images/lpasmilies/hug.gif[/img]
Lovely eyes' date=' DS. [/quote']
Hardly. You look nice.
Hush.<3
EXACTLY! December's Shadow you're so adorable on this one! <3
I don't know why people always notice my eyes first, no one really has until this year so that's a bit strange.

I'm waiting for 500+ posts so I can go play in the LPA arcade and try to beat Penny at Pacman and endanger her throne as champion. (You get these neat little banners under your username if you're a champ **** I want one). But I've had to be careful because they are strict on their rules, as you can get warned for saying "******" and stuff like that.

I love Derek's sig at the moment ^^ -

http://z.about.com/d/politicalhumor/1/0/L/f/bush_hurricane_cake.jpg
 
sounds cool ^^

I was about to join LPA once but I was kinda "scared" of being the noob and shiz and then like never get back on lol

but hmm... maybe we should move? *shotsmouth* did I say that out loud?

 

woodyloveslinkin

New member
Yeah you did Jos! Hahaha. Well almost 400 posts now on LPA, I'm looking forward to becoming the bejewelled champion more than anything. Man, I'm going to some serious gaming on there. I'm still thinking about moving over there. Well, if you're afraid you should just say "I'm December's Shadow's friend so you've gotta treat me nicely." Haha. I am popular over there. *lol* I'll see you there sometime Jos?

On facebook last night, I don't know how long I spent playing that word game, it's like scrabble but you get 7 letters and you've got 2 minutes or so to come up with the most words. I only got about 2700 points compared to Heather who has 5790 points. **** her.

Therapist today, ****. I don't feel like going. It's rainy and cold and I feel lazy. I was gonna wear my blue skirt and blue shirt but it looks too cold to wear it and I don't have the woollen stockings Imogen told me to get, I still can't ******* find it in the shops dammit! So I'm gonna just go in my PJs most probably. I've done it before and I'll do it again. Haha.

http://www.lpassociation.com/forums/member.php?u=12852 is where you'll probably only find me in a couple of weeks if I make up my mind ...

 

woodyloveslinkin

New member
I feel like ****. Physically and emotionally. I didn't even go to therapy today. That's how bad I felt.

I've got the line -

Where'd you go? I miss you so. Seems like forever that you've been gone in my head and it's just bringing back stuff I don't know if I want the feelings or not. I

n all brutal truth, I do miss him a lot. I miss our fun times. I miss how he used to stir me up like crazy (having a reflecting moment so mind the tears coming from me as I write this). I miss the "hey she's hot, why don't you sleep with her and then can I youtube it?" then I usually would retort by giving him the proverbial finger and an evil look. He would laugh and tell me he was joking :'( What I don't miss are the arguments. But I miss the shoulder to lean on, a place to stay when I don't want to be home...even though it hurts for me to say this like a lot, I don't want to get back into a relationship with him. And he acknowledges that as well. I am the one to blame afterall. I was the lousy gf who lashed out at him, deleted **** off his computer, and even though I wasn't his gf at another stage, I still tried to tell him what to do and I ended up hurting nobody but myself. I just thought to myself "I should go to sleep" but then I thought of how he used to hold me and then ******* try to roll over either onto me while I'm half asleep or I move over and I somehow get whacked in the face by either his fist or his elbow, not on purpose of course ^_^ We would have our hour or two nap in the afternoon and then go to bed around 11 and most of the time we were sharing a king single bed. There were times were a double was involved, but somehow I always got complaints no matter what the size of the bed was that I always took the blankets.....wtf? Mum said that was natural of men to do that.

The second time round was awesome. We had so much fun and we got along so well. The first time was just chaos because my parents didn't know that we were together and I felt like I had to hide it from them, well, mum found out because I told her my stepdad still doesn't know until this day.

The first time around was a bumpy ride, but we had some good memories. Us stuffing around in the park, drinking in no alcohol zones and not getting busted for it.

As much as I want to forget it I can still remember the first time I saw him and the first thing I said to myself, well a couple of things -

Any straight guy who's that cute, has to be gay.

Man, he's cute, let's see if I can chat him up.

And chat him up I did. Originally we had met at bus stop. I was sitting on the gutter waiting for the uni bus in O-week to come ask me if the bus stopped here. So we got each other's numbers and we went for O-week party that night. We did nothing but hang around each other (this recollection is actually cheering me up!) all night and we got smashed together. By the end of the night, people thought I was 16 and he was 30, lol. We made out and then we decided to go out.

I might go to sleep now and hug Billy the Cow instead. He's always good compensation.

 
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