RoyalOrleans

Marriage is old school theology turned ugly(or uglier) by the government and your potential in-laws.

Ohhh... believe me, sugar, I am totally happy with my lifestyle. I go and come go as I pleas and do my own thing. Right now, with my business early in its growing, I can't get wrapped up in a relationship. You want to fukk? Fine! So do I! Want to have supper some night? Fine! I get hungry! Want to spend the night? Fine! I get sleepy around nine! Just don't go expecting me to meet your girlfriends, your parents, your coworkers, etc... I don't have time for that. Well... today I do. I'm off today. Still... I just like to fukk.

I used to work an Arby's drive thru. Late one evening, must've been close to quitting time, a guy in a convertible pulled up to the window. His pants were down, his out, and he had just ejaculated all over hisself. He screamed to me, "Napkins! I need napkins!" I threw the entire dispenser at him and then ducked behind the counter. I heard a loud thud and a shriek. I looked outside and he had pulled away and down the lane. Never heard anything else out of that perv.

I wish there were an emoticon for a guy pissing his pants!

I do apologize, unreservedly, for the felling of your crest.

I believe that this has the market cornered. AMY WINEHOUSE

Yeah... the average score was 3. Your mom is a solid 6, but an 11 in bed.

I bet they did a body cavity search, because.... well... just because!!!

Honeychild, I thought I was the settling down type. After two failed marriages and several live-in relationships, it's probably best that I have come to this juncture. The lord has set me to wander, but I'm not lost.

I'm in between dysfunctional marriages.

Gandalf? Saruman? Not Radagast! Please no Rahagast!

If I'm not shallow, then I have no depth in character. I like what I like.

This is verbal masturbation, right? Just trying to fit in and/or keep up.

All the Jews in St. Louis Park are pretty smart, but I'd say that the bulk of Minnesotans are pretty dull.

"Butt Bandit - case cracked!" Hahaha!

With all those wangs to be critiqued, we may never hear from eddo again. If I were to find a Rate-My-Livestock site and post it here, we could say "adios" to wez, too. Hey eddo... I rated your mom a "6" over at Rate-a-MILF.com

Son... even if I were a butt-pirate, I like to think that I could do a whole lot better than you.

I would love to crack open that treasure trove of knowledge, but I would rather you judge for yourself. Do or do not. There is no try. RateMyBoobs - RateMyBoobs

White Rod the singer: toss him a pocket mirror, a baggy of coke, and a mountable singing bass. Black Rod the bouncer at the Purple Onion: Run! Run Run! Any direction! Get as far away from him as possible! He stalks by scent alone! Fly, you fool! GOOOOOO!!!!

Depends on what they look like slippery wet.

Which Rod are we talking about?

Yeah... I heard that in Russia, a rapist will ask the victim's name and scream it eerily throughout the process.

I laughed out loud with a big ass guffaw when Eddie said, "Fukk Jesse Jackson!" in Barbershop. The entire audience was black and my date was white, she was more offended by my outburst than thug-nasty and nasty-thug next to us.

Rod has the demeanor of a pussycat, but I'd seriously hate to make him mad. I mean, I could keep my distance from him. However, if he ever laid hands on me... it's all over. Motherfukker looks like a black Thing from the Fantastic Four.

The lazy eye. If you're trying to keep his attention by looking into his wandering eye, he gets frustrated thinking you walked away.