diana's journal

woodyloveslinkin said:
hey di. the play went well. YAY !!!! last night was the worst crowd.


love sarah.
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I'm glad it all went good... :) Go go, girl! :D *hugs*

Update:

A quick one...well, right now I'll go and wash my hair cuz I'm gonna met Miha in about an hour... :D Yeah...I hope all is gonna go well... :p
Oh, and one more thing...last night I didn't sleep very well...I went to bed at 11 pm...It took me about 2 hours to really fall asleep... :( Then I woke up at about 7 am...crazy...meh...whatever...more update later...Bye!
 
Thanks you guys! :D Mattie...*hugs back* :)

Update:

Okay...sooo...I went to Miha's place and been there till now practically...that's like more than 8 hours!! :eek: Yeah, it was pretty interesting...first, there was nothing special going on...we just tried to chat or something and then this ex school-mate came to show Miha her driving licence she just got...I was like okay, I don't have to bother much...so we were chatting a bit when Miha ( I think) came up with the idea of smoking pot...Teja was really into it and so we went outside to smoke some...it was my first time and we all together smoked 3 "scrools" of it...but it really didn't have any effect on me...or on anyone else...lol...

However, she then left and we were left alone...emmm...it's hard to explain what happened next but later we somehow had this conversation...He is not capable of any kind of relationship right now cuz he has enough of it for now...he said that it's just not worth it...(he have some bad experiances...) And he even don't want to fall in love at this moment...that means that he can't really have any deep feelings for me or anything...so we somehow agreed that we'll be just something like lovers, you know...just to keep it easy, to have fun...Of course I was a bit disappointed but I guess I kinda expected that to happen...Then we were just lying on his bed for like...uh...more than 2 hours, I think...and it was really nice...we were often just looking in eachother eyes...and I must say, he has this beautiful green eyes...so sweet...and from his look I'd easily say that he has some feeling for me but...I know that he doesn't have them or he doesn't want them to have...And I don't want to bother him too much cuz I don't want him to get hurt again...Idk...
Oh, and he said that it won't always be like that...he'll change his mind eventually, there's no doubt...so I guess there's still some hope...but we'll see what's gonna happen...I think that I too couldn't be in some serious relationship right now so...I guess it's all good...the only problem is that I think that I fell in love with him and it's a little hard...but I have to not love him...it's for my best, I think...
And another thing...well, since he had this gf for a year and a half, he has had sex before...for many times...but I'm a virgin...and it's a bit strange for me, you know...we talked about it and he said that he doesn't want to have sex with me right away, you know...even if I wasn't a virgin...but, since we're gonna be lovers...there's of course much more then just kissing...and I have to get used to that...I mean...cuz my head is all filled with some strange thoughts that are stopping me at doing something more, you know what I mean...I guess he'll help me with that...he knows almost everything...he wanted to know and I just had to tell him what's going on...
Well, what else could I told you...maybe I'll find later anything...or you can ask... :thumbsup:
 
well...sounds not that bad....I think there will be a chance for you...he just needs some time....you gonna be lovers...but don't have a relationship...did I understand that right?
 
Jeezy said:
well...sounds not that bad....I think there will be a chance for you...he just needs some time....you gonna be lovers...but don't have a relationship...did I understand that right?
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Yes, that's right...we're gonna be lovers...at least for now...no, it's not bad but...I just hope I'll be able to handle that good... And I completely understand him...
 
My sweet... I'm really tired and I was going to log off soon but honestly I want to tell you what I think about your experience because I know you want to hear right?

First of all, I must tell you that I've been in your shoes... this means I have been so much in love that I was willing to do anything just to be with that specific guy. He told you he doesn't want to get seriously involved in a relationship and just wants to have fun. Do you want that too? Do you feel alright about this? If so, then yes, go on, by all means. But, if you feel awkward about this and you are only submitting just for fear that you might lose him then I'd tell you to think it over... We should always have respect for ourselves and our own feelings OK my sweet?

As for having sex with him my sweet, whatever you do, don't rush and don't do anything unless you really feel ready for it OK? It is a magical experience as long as it involves the right person and the right feelings... And believe me, you'll know when the right time comes.

But, hey, you're a smart girl, I 'm sure you know what's best for you! I just gave you some advice cause am your friend and I do care! All I can say now is GOOD LUCK!!!! :thumbsup: :D
 
Jeez...actually, your new sig is pretty cool...I don't really know how you did that background and it looks pretty interesting...Chaz is maybe a bit too...hmmm...he should be more clearer, if you know what I mean...but, in general...looks good! :thumbsup:
Jojo...yes, I do appreciate your advices...always...I actually need them! Thank you for that! *squeeze hugs*
Well...I think I should start to have some fun...I have to start with something new cuz I'm always avoiding new and to me unknown stuff, you know...this sucks, believe me... :confused: Often I'm just wondering why I'm like that and I don't like this ****! Idk...However, maybe I don't want to lose him but...I know he won't push me into something I wouldn't want to do...And I think some experiences won't harm me, right?
And...I know that I shouldn't rush with sex...and he is not rushing either since he knows I'm a virgin...but there are other things too...you know what I mean...and...yeah...Emmm...in my head is something like this...I don't want the guy to please me if I can't please him, you know...and if I won't do something so he enjoys...I'll feel strange...Idk...like I said, we'll see where things are gonna go...
But I too know that everybody is like overreacting with that first sex thing...I don't want to expect much cuz there's a good posibility that I'll be disappointed...and cuz I don't want to be...I don't really care about first sex...Look, Idk...I'm just strange...my head is all filled with bunch of crap and...I know I'm thinking about everything way toooo much...I'm always complicating...eeerrrrr, do I really have to be like that?!? Damn...
 
My sweet Di, all I said to you was just make sure you really want to do the things you do with Miha, I never suggested it's bad trying new things! You sound willing and determined to give it a try! Therefore, as I said, it's all good! Go for it! ;) :D *hugs*
 
No, Chanty, I don't have a boyfriend...I have a lover...lol...this is a big difference...haven't you read it all?!? :eek:
Sygy...well, Miha is that guy I like and I probably fell in love with him...but I have to be careful with my feelings...
And, yeah, I guess I'm gonna sleep with him eventually...there's a big chance for that...what do you think about that? Any advice since you know about these things and stuff...?
 

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